The 5G Virus

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A tin foil cunting for propagators of the 5G /coronavirus conspiracy theorists, otherwise known as attention seeking mongs who were stuck indoors BEFORE the outbreak.

There seems to be an overlap of these cunts with depressives and their heavy social media use and being a worshipper of celebrities.This scientifically illiterate nonsense has spread quicker than you can say ‘Venn diagram’ and I am amused at the contradictory crap they come out with.

The madness has reached the point where bovine inhabitants of Brum and Merseyside have been setting fire to metal demons… Telephone masts.

Give it a couple of weeks and telecoms engineers will be stuffed inside wicker men.

Ask any of these foaming cunts how 5G activates/replicates the viral symptoms and they’ll start talking about electrical waves and our bodies being made of water.

They can’t explain it and get angry when exposed as being the very last thing they’d claim to be; a guileless, clueless, semi-literate gormless pile of mutton.

Get to fuck, watch ‘Love Island’ and stop mangling the concept of the EM spectrum, you malignant half-witted cretinous cunts.

Nominated by Cuntamus Prime

78 thoughts on “The 5G Virus”

  1. What the fuck? Are the zombies gathering in herds up there, or are aliens stationed above your major cities?

    I love a good conspiracy as much as the next cunt, but this one is seriously left field. Surely if it were true, which it isn’t, then everyone within range of the mast would drop dead or whatever the fuck is supposed to happen.
    I’m assuming the sheeple running with this shit haven’t thought of that.

    Either way, it’s good for a laugh and for that I thank you, Cuntamus.

    • First the Scottish CMO, now it looks like it’s your health minister flouting lockdown rules this time. Rules for thee but not for me it seems.

    • Superb nom Cuntamus – had me laughing my ass off 🙂
      A very well written & hillarious nom.

      Have you considered writing comedy scripts ? Christ knows that most of the current crop of ‘comedians’ wouldn’t recognise a funny line if it smacked them in their overpaid gobs.

      Now, these tinfoil wearing crackpots usually confine themselves indoors… wary of the potential of UFO abduction and being gang probed by the little green men (no, NOT leprechauns).
      Burning down mobile phone masts ! FFS, what’s next ? Burning down TV transmitters as they fear SKY remotes will change the message playing in their heads ? (Infamy, Infamy, they’ve all got it in for me).

  2. It was Sparkhill in Birmingham where they set fire to the mast. Its the most peaceful and enriched part of the city. (And a stones throw from where I live) Enough said.

    • Ah, that explains it, the infidel technology! Burn it, burn it all! Thick, stone age cunts probably got told by their magical pee-do sky fairy to set fire to the masts.

    • If you give a book to a chimp, he’ll just hit it with a rock…. or shit on it….

    • Could well be an efnick angle to this. I can visualise ranting beards but no moustache. Lots of angry shouting in some foreign tongue and many pairs of baggy pants. All because the 5g may empower women or something. We are paying for these cunts and many similar sometimes I wonder who is the cunt.

      • What is it with beards with no mustache?
        I can’t stop looking at the mustache area thinking ‘there’s something not quite right there’ 🤔

  4. Great nom, I’ve been seeing this shite all over telegram. Never bothered watching the videos but I think their main point is: ‘radiation causes cancer’…
    Errr yea… course it does.
    But I’d rather give up a bit of my life (I’m gonna spend the last 10 years shitting myself and getting all joe Biden about shit anyway) and enjoy the sweet glories of the fruits of western civilisation, than live as a tribesmen in some fuckin cave somewhere wearing a tin foil hat….
    I actually had a bit of a cunting about this 5g shit but I framed it wrong….. wrong time. Rooting for boris
    Great nom CP….

  5. How the fuck does a phone mast spread a virus?

    Come on Greta, put your Crayon’s down,take off your anti head banging spaz helmet and help us all out. Alternatively, we could ask Jordan or Gemma Collins…..

    God bless the Queen.
    Long live Boris Johnson.

    Question: What job did Suck Dick Khunt’s father do when he came from Pakistan? He has never said….

    • …..A driver or some kind…. can’t put my finger on it, he never mentioned…..

      …space shuttle.

      London has one of those right…

  6. Apologies slightly off topic, Piece Morgan on GMTV asking can we bring back former prime ministers to help the government ie Traitor Blair Cameron G, brown are you a fucking retard CUNT

    • Better idea: can we bring back former PM’s to be hung by the testicles and beaten with cricket bats…..
      Piers needs to learn how to make good television….

  7. I have taken the opportunity to go around burning all the “Public Footpath” and “Cycle Route” signs that I can find.

    Not sure if this is relevant but it certainly made my day.
    ……………………..
    Best Wishes to anyone dealing with/suffering from ChinkyFlu.

    • Hmmmm. Looks like someone’s been pulling the permissive footpath signs round here, with the result that the hordes of cunts who have recently discovered walking (to get away from their coronoid families) can be found blearily sprackling across fields of winter wheat. Be careful what you wish for, Dick. Personally I’d be putting up signs (Unexploded Ordnance; Anthrax Control Zone; Quicksand; Nesting Crocodiles) rather than destroying them.

  8. Numbskull rockapes. I can’t muster a better description of these completely clueless mast-urbators.

    Elsewhere, the ever charming Laura Kuntssberg has written the following gem:

    “With Boris Johnson now in intensive care, it is abundantly clear that power is no protection from harm.”

    Kuntssberg is an almighty nasty piece of shit. Fuck her and her wonky gob of pure poison. Hopefully Boris will have this licked and will be back on form very shortly.

    • “With Boris Johnson now in intensive care, it is abundantly clear that power is no protection from harm.”

      But it appears that cuntitude is…..
      Therefore my vaccine against coronavirus is to be as much of a cunt as I can….

      IMMUNE….

    • The BBC is doing its bit to undermine the U.K. In addition to explaining what an intensive care unit is ( FFS) it is reporting that a panel of ‘experts’ are questioning whether shutting schools has a real impact on stopping the rapid spread of the illness. This report comes after another piece by the BBC last week where a panel of ‘experts ‘’ lambasted’ HMG for not closing schools quickly enough. On the same page we have the obligatory dark care worker complaining that she ‘does not feel valued’.

      • They never feel valued.

        You could give them a knighthood, a place in the house of lords, grace and favour apartment, free trips to the Carribbean in the winter months, etc and they would STILL complain.

        These cunts live to complain. Like us cunters ironically.

  10. Surely though, we ought to be at least suspicious of 5G? Just the fact that energy companies are so insistent on their customers “upgrading” to smart meters is enough reason to do a little research.
    No foil hatter myself, but corporations never do anything to benefit mankind and what with all that’s going on worldwide, I believe that this might be a preamble to keeping tabs on whole populations via 5G towers.
    https://www.globalresearch.ca/5g-danger-13-reasons-5g-wireless-technology-will-be-a-catastrophe-for-humanity/5680503

    • Morning CF, true at the moment, it’s like fucking groundhog day. But within another couple of weeks, people are going to start saying “we’re not prisoners of the state, so fuck this” and start going out and about as usual (hopefully laughing in the faces of the control freak pussy tiny-dicked Police), even if the economy hasn’t picked up.

      • “What valuable data will be gleaned from the surveillance?”… that their next attack should centre on poisoning Maccers burgers and Costa coffee. Although that shit barely qualifies as food and beverage anyway so arsenic would liven it up quite considerably.

    • Two legitimate concerns:

      The ‘internet of things’ 5G will help pave the way for. Do we really need this? Honestly? Or will it help accelerate an even tighter state surveillance grid?

      Health concerns. Aside from the fact that we’ll all be bathed in its output without consultation or choice, there is no reason for me to believe the companies involved would either tell us or even know if it was potentially hazardous to our health. From the cellular level to the psychological.

      There’s simply too much immediate money to be made, by pumping 4K Love Island feces into the faces of the masses, for them to care.

  11. Piers Morgan has spent weeks trying to lose one of his chins by screaming ‘WHAT THE HELL IS BORIS DOING’? and yesterday asking why he’s taking up an NHS bed.
    He has gone all pray for Boris today the two faced three chinned wankstain.

  12. The 5G conspiracy is mainly concerned with the ability of governments to use a 5G grid for tracking and control, the IoT is extended into every area of life, eventually where you go will be controlled by 5G capable devices.

    5G doesn’t create the virus, the health concerns are surrounding the impact of radiation generated by 5G transmissionz

    • China shouldnt get any goverment contracts in light of them half killing the world.
      They shouldnt get anything.
      No good bought, any good they have for sale ppen to massive taxes, sanctions, and shunned world wide.
      They are up to something.
      At the moment theyre saying their virus didnt eminate from wuhan and its other countries that are to blame.
      They need to be dealt with and harshly.

      • Great idea to have massive taxes on Chinese goods to start paying off the massive damage their duplicitous actions are causing in civilised countries. I can’t wait for the real story of this tragedy to emerge. I suspect that it won’t happen in my lifetime.

  14. Slightly off topic. I’d just like to slip in a Yangtze River, Chicken Chop Suey cunting, to the chilli bat wing eating, narrow eyed, bandy legged, buck toothed yellow monkeys. Fuck the lot of you.

  15. The internet of things. Again, look to the little yellow bastards and their social credit system. You are a fucking number.
    Whoosh, there’s my tinfoil hat flapping in the microwave breeze.

  16. I am occasionally a conspiracy theorist but not for things like this.

    The occasions where I wear dust off my tinfoil hat are generally when someone dies in an “unfortunate accident”.
    For example, a recently deceased billionaire sexual predator, being watched 24/7 by security and yet was able to make 2 attempts at “suicide” and was successful on the 2nd attempt.

    • With a certain royal parasite seen leaving the scene. With a garrotte. And being picked up by a Fiat. With an old cunt driving. Coincidence? I think not.
      CCTV footage available on Russia Today and Iranian TV but ‘they’ wont let you see it because they control all the 5G things.
      The cunts.

    • Well, if conspiracy theories are allowed; heres mine. BIG SPECTACLES ON WIMMIN. !! YES SPECTACLES..
      Before people started getting ill and dying you saw some wimmin on t.v wif big gregories. Now folk are getting ill and dying theres all these wimmin EXPERTS are popping up and to a man (so to speak) they all have big specs.. The virus is spread down the t.v wires from their specs.
      Also, how many rinky dinks have you seen wearing specs large or otherwise? Nah damn few.

      • Tinfoil has gone up in price at my local Asda.

        This is just a ruse to increase sales.

        The secret’s in the name-tinFOIL. They are out to foil us, foil all our plans.

        I swallowed it for a while but I won’t get foiled again.

  17. There is definitely something else going on here.

    If the chinks have weaponised SARS and let it loose from the lab, that is one thing.

    Why lock down entire continents when the mortality rate is around 4%?

    Since October last year, common or garden flu has infected 51 million and killed 57,000. Nasty stuff indeed, but we don’t lock down continents because of this.

    Within the last few years, we have had cases of Bubonic plague and Ebola turn up in the UK. Both of these are nearly always fatal. So why weren’t we in lockdown when these were diagnosed?

    Something doesn’t smell right about this and there are going to be huge changes to the way we live when the lockdown is lifted.

    • I get the same sniff of a hidden agenda also. Interestingly, last evening an unexpected statistic cropped up. It stated that Ethnic Minorities were 9 times more susceptible to the virus, and 1/3 of all admissions to Intensive care were ethnic minorities.
      The stat also said that minorities were 1/3 of all ventilations. Strange as they only comprise 13% of the poulation.

      Has Merkel found a solution to her error of judgement ?

      • Hanging out in mosques helps, they closed the Christian churches mind….
        Win-win.

  18. Do they really think it causes Covid 19 or is it just a backlash on the masts because it’s a kick in the bollocks to things Chinese?

    • Exactly Crusty. I immediately thought this load of crap is what the government would want you to believe is the motive for damaging the masts. In reality, this is more likely to be a political protest as a kickback to the Chinese and objecting to the Huawei contract.

  19. The BBC need to omit China from the graphs they show during the evening government updates because their figure is THE BIGGEST LOAD OF BOLLOCKS ever to be seen on a data graph.
    GOBSHITES!!

  20. I keep looking on the local Takeaway menu……I can’t find 5G any fucking where!

  21. Yup, and you know who’s heading this water tight ‘theory’ on the internet? Yes, that’s right. Enter stage David Icke. I saw him spewing his paranoid delusional swill on a YouTube podcast called ‘London Real’ yesterday, which was a follow up to a distressingly popular previous appearance he made watched by 10 million people. One born every minute.

    His basic thesis is that 5g causes us to fail to ‘absorb oxygen’. Hence all the respritory disease we are seeing. The silly, grey haired goon has zero hard, thought-out evidence to undergird this wacked out garble. Just some deep state, meandering conjecture that’s so out there you wonder, if what he said was true, and he’s really pulling the lid off the whole grand scandal, what’s stopping the geopolitical world order (who can kill with 5G) from just rubbing this guy off the face of the planet and making it look like some accident or a bad flu got him. Shit, just hide some plutonium in his cornflakes.

    Fucking worrying, that people might actually be receptive to the only top flight goalkeeper more mental than Bruce Grobbelaar ie David ‘the lizards are out to get me’ Icke.

    And as the original post indicates, the only people tend to be weed smokers and deadbeat fuckheads so wilfully out of touch with reality that they turn to his high functioning mental illness to rationalise their own.

    Scary, scary shit.

    • David Icke’s forums are always a good place to go if you’re feeling a bit down and you fancy a laugh.

      • I concur, Chris Spivey is another mentally ill fuvkwit in a similar vein, even more deranged I’d say.

        5g causing coronavirus reminds me of the brown noise episode of South Park.

    • As another poster pointed out, I believe the masts that were destroyed were in more ‘peaceful’ areas, such as Sparkhill.

      Icke has rather a large following among peaceful members of society. The reason being that he claims that the earth is controlled by a satanic cult of space lizards. Who just happen to be, for the most part, Jewish. This wild antisemitism has created a rather loyal fan base for Mr Icke to tap in to. It makes him money. If you watch him or read one of his books, you’ll see he uses the most tenuous of links as ‘evidence’. Usually by translating a word in an ancient language into English (incorrectly or with wild linguistic licence) and making up his own stuff from that. Or making outlandish claims with no evidence at all when he’s used a few examples of using ‘evidence’. Such as, the moon isn’t real it’s a hollowed out spaceship watching over us.

      Personally, I think the man is simply a con-man who’s thought up a rather clever (if nasty) way to make money. His market is the peacefuls, the extreme right and drug addicted nutcases for the most part. He decided to tap into these markets, in my opinion, after he had a mental breakdown and ruined his broadcasting career in the early 90’s by announcing himself as the son of god on the BBC.

      • Absolutely. I suppose, when the world brands you as a crazy, instead of pleading his sanity (thus making you look crazier) he decided to double down on his theories instead. And it’s been lucrative, as you say. Selling out large venues and selling a mountain of books.

        And he’s also hilarious. Maybe the lizard overlords keep him around as a folly to laugh at whilst sitting on the moon eating cheese?

    • I will have to watch that! I’m always keen to see what ‘scientific’ explanations conspiracy theorists have for their nonsense. Ancient Aliens was a laugh riot.

      Usually a bastardisation of quantum mechanics. What Murray Gell-Mann called quantum flapdoodle.

  22. Great nom CP – loaded with venom, I like that.

    I wonder how many of those there peacefulls who believe a 5G transmitter 😂😂 causes viruses / cancer actually smoke?

      • No not conclusive, 5G may be all fine and dandy, the concern for many is that there may be unintended consequences rolling out the technology.

        The soft cell is faster downloads but the commercial reality is 5G is currently sold on 4G data plans. 5G can eat a months worth of 4G data in an hour, end users are not the intended beneficiaries of 5G, who is?

  24. Google ” Raconteurs News ” Their latest video with a couple of split arsed know alls. The biggest pair of twats from oop north you will ever see. Telling us all how 5G is behind it all.

  25. I posted a few cunts ago that social media (this is a website not that) should be shut down to stop cunts over thinking this utter bollocks. I still think this.

    • Me and my young chum Lud are too busy smashing evil weaving looms and “steamful moving iron machines” so we sent some of our people round to do the “big sky pointy devil’s things” – the f*cking annoying thing is half the gang fell off the edge of the Earth – and as we know “there be monsters” I think we can say goodbye to them 😢
      Now – which awful person suggested hoofing a brick through the window of their local Chinese takeaway with “F*cking M*rderers” written on it? No need for that sort of thing now!

  26. I dont see the 5G internet of things as a conspiracy, but an unfortunate progression from where are now. I think it’s sensible to be skeptical about an internet of things. Do you need a house with heating, lighting and the kitchen linked to the internet? I think it’s a fucking idiotic idea.

    My issue is the linking of the technology with the virus. None of the proponents know the supposed mechanism. They claim to have ‘studied’ it, but just like ‘truthers’ they clearly havent.
    As for radiation, mobile masts use long wave radiation, not X rays.
    Again, no cunt has ever described how long-wave radiation exposure leads to cancer. We’d all be riddled with tumours if it was.

  27. I wonder how long until the next one 6G then the rest, 7,8,9,10,11, all the way up to twelfty G.

    Also, what does it all mean? With each generation, does internet on phones gets faster? The ability to talk to an astronaut whom is all the way out in space?

  28. Guten tag, mein herr. Ze coronavirus iz a zleeper projekt of my inventsion, herr adolf hitler. I obtained zis virus from ze same alienz zat are in USAs ‘Area 51’. It waz dezignated for releaze in 2039, but it zeemz to have been releazed early by my swinehund ztaff! Der pimmelkopfs!

  29. Sounds like a hippy guy I knew years ago who considered himself something of a scientist. He was trying to explain to me about how astrology works re: the pull of the moon and the constellation being in your anus etc.

    Cut a long story short, his explanation about how the moon affects behaviour was “well the moon causes the ocean tides and the human body is made up of mostly water…….. see?!” …………. how very fucking scientific, how very fucking precise.

    The sorts of people who believe all this Covid/4g nonsense are the sort who believe that praying for a thing to happen followed by that thing happening shows causation. Post Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc inded.

    • I just saw a horseless carriage sailing along like the wind! Are you mad – science has proven if you go more than seven MPH it will tear your lungs out!
      Oh, the horror! 😁😱

      • I heard if you drive more than 88 MPH in your car, you will travel back in time. That’s why the Illuminati set the speed limit to 70 MPH, they just don’t want us to know da troof!

  30. I used to think that Icke cunt was mental, but now I’m sure he’s just a fucking con man. Perhaps he did believe all that lizard shit he spouted on Wogan, but a few even duller cunts must have approached him and said they believed him, and when the internet came along, he had a world of mongs to see his shows, and buy his books, and donate to his campaign for truth and justice. Along the way, he seems to have woven lots of other conspiracies shite to tally up with the shite he’s spouting to give himself an even bigger audience. I heard one of the thick cunt, Putin loving retards in work mention Icke earlier, and what he said sums up the mind of the Mong. He said Icke was wrong about some things, but spot on with others, instead of dismissing it all because it came out of the mind of a manic. People believe the shit they want, regardless of who’s telling them, in the same way people dismiss some stories in the bible/Koran as apocryphal or silly, but believe all the other crap.

    • Icke is what I describe as a useful idiot. I have genuine concerns about the way our civil liberties have been taken away over coronavirus but let a crackpot like icke peddle his talk if lizard people and cod science and it helps the cause for taking them away by associating the genuinely concerned with loons like icke.

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