Jay Kay

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The ghost of cunts past: Jay Kay of Jamiroquai fame.

I see no reason why fuckers who were exhibiting colossal cuntitude in their prime pre-ISAC should escape a rightful, retrospective cunting.

Just like that serial sex-offender from the 70s who thought he was in the clear until advances in DNA forensics got him the punishment he deserves, so too should Jay fucking Kay get belatedly hauled before the courts of this glorious website.

Jay Kay may have been a pint-sized manlet, but do not for one moment mistake his cunt stature as anything other than colossal. Casting our minds back to the late-90s, Jay Kay was in his pomp, excreting out repetitive cod-funk bollocks and hanging out with that whole TFI Friday/Priory Clinic/E-Generation stable of monolithic cuntitude.

In between cultivating a ‘bad boy’ image and wearing hats too gay even for Julian Clary, he had several scuffles with the paps and eventually got gloriously headbutted by one of them. Even more fucking savoury was the fact that this hero was never charged by the police.

I suppose this fucker was the back-then equivalent of someone like Lily Allen. Musically overachieved, sold a shitload, loved the press attention and regularly made a cunt of himself thanks to largely being too fucking stupid for words. Shagged fellow cunt and Essex super-bike Denise Van Outen, to just top things off.

Here’s hoping that there’s no mainstream return for this Cunt Cowboy, I give you Jay Kay.

Nominated by The Empire Cunts Back

29 thoughts on “Jay Kay”

  1. Features on the cover of a long lost Dr Suess book
    The Twat in the Hat…

  2. Some called him the Cat in the Hat. I say Cunt in the Hat. I’d gamble a boatload of money that he’s a hug-a-refugee prick who voted Remain. Virtual In-saan-idy. Virtual bell-end. Actual Stevie Wonder rip-off. Get those fucking feathers off your head, you look like Charles Hawtry in Carry On Cowboy.

  3. Is this the chap who was on Top Gear having his ego gold plated by that plank Clarkson, wonderful achievement going faster than another ego powered celebrity twat, riveting viewing.

    • Yes it was. To be fair to him all that repetitive music earned him a fucking fortune, got his leg over way out of his short arsed league, and got himself a stable of cars that most of us can only ever dream about.

      The only saving grace was he beat that other cunt Cowell to top spot.

      Still a fucking cunt though.

  5. That fucking wobbly-legged dance he did. Also Elvis Costello cunt. What’s with that? Come to think- the Fine Young Cannibals fella. Mixed race him. Maybe that’s how B&WC appears at Carnival? All wobbly- legged. Not from dancing though.

  6. Let us know who the guy from the press was who banged him and I will buy him a drink. JK is an absolute arsehole a proper cunt.

  7. All ‘Acid’ Jazz’ is steaming shite… Was briefly hip in the 90s (all that hipster faux loungecore all back to mine bollocks)… Jay Kay and Jammyrocky went into the mainstream and were arguably the most irritating cunts in 90s pop (except those Toploader twats with ‘Cunting In The Moonlight)… Kay was another champers socialist hypocrite and all… His first album portrayed him as some sort of humanitarian and right on social conscience… His second album (and every other one after that) was about slags and fast cars… Basically a mirror of his life… When the Fast Show did their Jazz Club sketches, they were taking the piss out of this cunt….

  8. Couldn’t name a single choon and thought he has melted into the obscurity he deserves years ago. I seem to remember his hat was the same height as him.

  11. Absolute wanker. I cried with laughter when he got nutted by that camera man

    • Dont hear about this little tit anymore do we? Like most people i loved him getting butted off that journo, shame bloke didnt fill him in! Bet they still tour, small clubs, piers, student unions etc, hated the acid jazz shite although liked his head wear? Know what they say? “If you cant fight wear a big hat”…

  12. A premium grade loudmouth cunt. Never liked him back in the day. Dancing around like a spastic chimp on glue with rickets. That footage where he’s acting like a total cunt, getting up in people’s faces and mouthing off, before getting that bloke’s forehead smashed into his teeth. He quickly quietened down after that. Gold.

  15. I have imbibed brandy and smoked cigarettes fashioned with herbs procured from one of b&wc’s bredrenz but that is a top quality and long deserved cunting.

    Evening gents. *hic*

  16. Are those spiked things on his hat to stop pigeons landing on it?

    Always disliked this pipsqueak little knobhead and still do now. He always behaved like he was a legend in his own mind. So egotistical and obnoxious with his paparazzi strops and bloody car collection. Plus he danced like he was having a bad enema reaction.

    What a tosser.

    Hope to fuck he stays gone.

    • I love your postings Nurse Cunty but at the back of my mind is the thought that you might be a male in disguise. Please don’t take this the wrong way but you seem to have views which accord with a male outlook. Are you sure you’re not a man trapped in a females body? I still love you whatever!
      😊😊😊

      • Ah, Thanks BSC! You’ve made my day with your reply!

        Yeah, I do wonder myself sometimes. I relate far more to the male outlook on life than my fellow females. I cannot be doing with most of them. They just annoy me! My Dad was in the Navy so I had quite a strong male influence growing up, with his own VERY dry and cynical sense of humour and outlook on life. Maybe that is where it comes from! I get more sarcastic and stroppy as I get older too, so there is that as well…….tolerance level: 0!! 😂😂😂😂
        P.S. Love you too! 😂

  17. Can’t help myself but……..
    Who would of thought 50 years after the first American landed on the moon, the first Africunt would land in a garden in Clapham.

  18. Looks like a cunt therefore is a cunt. Has an air of cuntishness about him that a good hiding would not sort out. He used to wear fuckwit hats as well,

  19. He is one of the Jamie fat tongue Oliver rent a friend crowd.

    Another cunt of immense proportions who unfortunately still blights the media.

    Here is hoping they go out for a Sunday drive together and never come back.

    Cunts

  20. Baffled jamirqoua (stupid name i can’t be arsed to spell it right) became such a big band,I assumed they were a one hit one album wonder I only know of their singles virtual insanity and canned heat

    Not big on acid jazz or soul funk but it can’t be worse then the brit pop faggos like oasis and blur I’ll download some of jamirqouas stuff later to figure out how cuntish his music is or if there is some salvageable good tunes to be enjoyed

  21. I didnt mind Jamiroquai at the time. I was about 17 back then but I still thought Jay Kay was a odious tit, much like Russell Crowe.

    Ive never had trouble separating art from artist though.

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