Now I’m calling them imposters….I may be wrong and there really are genuine. However,if they are, I must assume that the SAS has the equivalent membership to the Chinese army. Over the years I must have heard dozens of them blasting off about their derring-do,and strangely they always seem to believe that a public bar is the best place to share their tales.
A few years ago I had the rather dubious pleasure of being friends with a tree-surgeon. I was aware that he was some kind of an army reservist but he never really encouraged anyone to ask him about it,and he wasn’t the kind of man to push. It wasn’t until he died that I discovered that he actually was something to do with the Special Services..still no idea what exactly. Now considering that he was a grand craic when he’d had a drink and could tell the finest tales about when he played rugby at a high level, felled dangerous trees etc.and yet never felt the need to even mention his military career,it just makes these pub blowhards look even more pathetic.
I’m happy to admit that I can sometimes “gild the lily” when in full flow, but how fucking sad must you be to claim that you were a member of the SAS when,in truth,you probably got no further than the cookhouse at Aldershot Barracks?
Fuck them.
Nominated by Dick Fiddler
Now there is a little group of people who deal with these “Types”
https://www.facebook.com/The-Walter-Mitty-Hunters-Club-HQ-315222931946839/
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Never heard of this group but they appear to be doing excellent work!! 👍
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Ironically one of the guys who started it got outed as a walter himself
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I’ve never encountered these shysters myself. Perhaps they merely prey on the simple or gullible-looking to procure free pints.
🗿
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The Fred Dibnah lookalikes.
4
Ha ha. Afternoon RT
Lookalike bluffer or real one, Fred Dibnah wouldn’t have swallowed any guff and certainly wouldn’t have dished it out.
The listener would’ve needed subtitles.
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Afternoon Capt. – my comment was meant as a cryptic reference to one of our highly esteemed colleagues known to liken his appearance to the aforementioned Mr Dibnah. (See thread in the Smoking Intolerance nom).
I’ll give no further clues, except to say his name begins with a D and ends with ick Fiddler…
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I knew what you meant, Ruff-Tuff, hence my ha ha.
I’m not as thick as my avatar looks, you know. Well…
1
Fuckin’ hell, that guy in the photo is so decorated, he looks as though he’s fought in every war over the last 300 years. Still, appearances can be deceptive with the medals that twat Prince Charles wears, despite never seeing any action at all in his lifetime. However, he fully deserves that one he wears for being married to old fuckin’ horse face Camilla. Those bastards like Charlie who wear ceremonial medals are a fuckin’ disgrace to the real soldiers of this country, many of whom will have no medals at all.
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I love to see the royals in their full military regalia. More fucking medals than Idi Amin, and with as much right to wear them.
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Roger Day, a complete cunt and they are not his medals either
4
Aye Dick the real ones tend to say fuck all its the sad fucks who did basic training that won’t let up telling you how they blew up bridges and shit ….utter crap
One brilliant true story from the Falklands. SAS land in secret but so do the SBS (special boat service) and run in to each other and open fire. Each side kill 1 each I think, but both sides are saying to each other ” fuck me we never knew Argentina had crack troops like this!”
Wasn’t till after they found out they’d been shooting at each other
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I was in Port Stanley when the first shot went off. I was changing my trousers when the second one did. Don’t like to talk about it, like my charity work.
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I think it’s just called ‘Stanley’
The ‘Port’ is either due to the fact it’s right on the water or there is ‘Port’ in the vicinity.
Either way it’s also got a Thatcher Way, or Drive. Brilliant.
Mare Harbour aptly named but not sure about Mount Pleasant though.
My Grandfathers WWII campaign medals are framed and take pride of place in my hallway.
Any cunt that wears them under false pretence should face a firing squad in my book. Cunts.
8
Just found out that the bastard in the photo was the guy who was arrested for falsely wearing SAS medals.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/8454715.stm
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The Army act makes wearing any military decoration, badge, wound stripe or emblem without authority a criminal offence. It is also illegal to wear a replica “as to be calculated to deceive”, and to falsely represent yourself as someone entitled to wear any such award. That twat Charlie should be arrested immediately and that other fuckin’ old Greek git.
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However they do not give a fuck, I was contacted by colleagues when my medals were sold in a london auction house( they were fakes I still have mine), I challenged the dealer who refused to say where they had come from (colchester).
it would seem that someone purchased blanks and had my name and number stamped on them after rumours of my death circulated.
I am happy to say that the auction price was quite good £215 which isn’t bad for a £60 restrike , but I can do fuck all about it and plod isn’t interested either.
5
Ex royal marine, never ever felt the need to justify my time to civilian folk or snowflakes, my time done want nothing fuck the weak who pretend
8
Peter de la Billiere was once asked if he was first into the Iranian embassy in 1980 and he replied “No but I know hundreds who were”
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Incidentally though I do know somebody who actually was in the SAS during the Falklands war, no daring tales etc. he just said they had to hide in freezing observation posts and report enemy positions back to the task force, openly admits he didn’t fire a single shot or even aim his gun at anyone.
8
well the bar room bulshiters are boring, the ones in a conflict are dangerous.
I once met a chap sporting the uniform of our infantry support (done the gulf and everything) thing is he didn’t seem to realise that he was talking to someone who was in the Cavalry regiment he supposedly supported in the gulf, likewise things can go the other way too,
attached an article about a bar room hero who bigged himself up so much he belived his own shit and got shot by the police.
https://www.yorkshirepost.co.uk/news/latest-news/ex-mercenary-predicted-his-violent-death-1-2403309
so the shut the fuck up idea is always best.
2
Bullshitters are very easy to spot when they haven’t even done their homework on who they supposedly served with, one fella once claimed to have been on the ship which sunk the Belgrano.
I said “the submarine Conqueror?” he goes “no the destroyer HMS Invincible”
That’s how dense some of these clowns are, the HMS Invincible which served in the Falklands as anyone will know was an aircraft carrier and coincidentally I was reading a book around that very time called “Sink the Belgrano” which is an account of the story.
The story is also quite well known because even to this very day nearly 40 years on the HMS Conqueror remains the only nuclear submarine to sink another ship in combat, it’s what that sub is famous for.
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Obviously I know colour the boat house at Hereford is but I don’t like to talk about it etc….
4
I didn’t know your were a member of the Special Angling Service Mecha. The Wye is a beautiful spot to do a bit of fishing.
4
* taps side of nose conspiratorially *
2
Is that the scene from “Ronin” and the way Robert De Niro pronounces “Hereford” as “Here-ford”?
3
These guys are a joke. Years ago I worked briefly with a guy who led people to believe that he was an SAS reservist, if there even is such a thing. He never openly made the claim of course, but was always making ‘in the know’ comments or dropping hints to give the clear impression that he was something to do with special forces but ‘couldn’t talk openly about it’.
Naturally the only person who gave him any credence at all was himself, the twat.
8
There’s a TA SAS, or at least was as Chris Ryan was one at first and despite accusations of him exaggerating his stories he definitely became full SAS.
6
I think one of the units I was in could be referred to as “special forces” not because of any elite training, but the mental calibre of some of them.
(one went for a walk unarmed in a front line village on his day off, when I bolocked him explaining the safety issues behind his actions, He explained to me that he was in no danger because he was unarmed and it was his day off so the enemy couldn’t kill him because it was against the Geneva convention.)
9
Territorial SAS ?
A few years ago we needed some close protection due to the work we were doing, we employed a company who’s owner was a former Para then SAS …
He recruited from both para/ marines and associated special forces…. so met a fair few over the 5-6 years we used the company, been out on a few drinks too, never seen them mouthing off in a bar or giving it large , maybe some do but not the lads who worked with us!
A few of them invited us down to the cenotaph a few times and even into their pub afterwards!!
Top fellas!!
And if they weren’t I wouldn’t fucking mention it 😂😂😂
Any cunt who impersonating them deserves a dose of public humiliation!! And maybe more……..
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The worst sort of cunt!!
Throwing in plenty of army banter!
Hoping some cunt will ask the question
These Walter Mitty types are not just fixated by the army they appear all over the shop, there’s a cunt down my local gym who’s always gotta tan, never likes to say what he’s been doing on his trips? Secret squirrel 007 wanker!! Prick probably works as an air steward or something else equally dull….
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I got my Victoria Cross by heroically buying a replica for twelve quid on eBay.
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At least your more honest than prince Charles CNR 😂😂
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A cunt: pure and simple
https://imgur.com/r/uniformporn/5Q3JOwD
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(genuine link showing Prince Fucking Charles in his military uniform with a shitload of bling on his chest!)
4
Services to shafting Camilla up the Pall Mall while taking Lady Diana for a ride!
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Mind you his brother prince Edward the dud was even worse!! Didn’t he quit on the marines training course? With the whole country watching!
And then he humiliated himself further by becoming involved in theatre?
And worse still if it’s possible appeared on “ it’s a royal knockout “ ?
I bet he’s got a chest full of service medals too?
Utterly useless twat……..
15
Any cunt that freely volunteers the fact that they were in the SAS/SBS wasn’t.
And is a total cuntwipe.
12
Indeed so, Cuntzilla.
Not that long ago, an ex-squeeze of mine had been going steady for a long time with a hard cunt from the “specials”.
She reliably informed me he was so insanely obsessive about secrecy/identity breaches that he would take cumbersomely extreme measures to avoid being photographed, even though they were just having it large in Ibiza. Not a single snap of them together existed.
His obsession was my good fortune; she was a real honey-bunny. She’d clearly not realised the deal with him, but then nor did she with me. A daughter of a diplomat unaware of the need for secrecy was a surprise to us both “Chris” and me.
It was a brief but joyous relationship.
1
Not only was my reply authentic, Cuntzilla, but also moderated –despite its wholly unobjectionable content (unless you’re a civil servant).
Vicarious apologies to all concerned.
*It wasn’t important*
Was going to say “bit different”, but that would be untrue.
1
Another of my favourite bullshit merchants was when I worked in a pub in my teens, I was on the bar one afternoon and this guy was going on about his time in Northern Ireland with the Paras, now as coincidence would have it, I asked him what he was doing the following weekend, to which he replied “nothing mate why” I said because a group of 40-50 bikers are coming for their annual meet up as they’re all ex-Paras who served on Operation Banner, I went on that any ex-Para is welcome, you don’t have to have a bike and he’s like “Oh aye I’ll definitely be there I might see some lads I know”
Following Saturday did he show up? Did he shite. Still believe to this day he was a Walt as he never showed his face again in that pub.
12
The trouble with this cunting is, its difficult to sort the Uncle Alberts from the rest!
7
on a sub note, I would like to say Arthur Denaro (who was SAS) is a massive gobshite, and a cunt.
Though I never reached the dizzy heights of compatible rank (or owned a polo pony) My ex brother in law did, he thinks he is a cunt too, One of the recruiting agencies run by another ex think he is a cunt too.
so it can’t just be me.
7
Never met any members of the SAS as far as I know whilst doing my stint. Have met and heard of many once back in the land of norm. One chap was a serial womaniser had a wife and kid but liked to shag around. His story was that as a member of the SAS he did something naughty in NI and had to leave, he was working for Dixons based in Stevenage. This is the line he used as a clincher if he thought he would get his leg over; if true well he was what he was, somewhat careless with his personnel security and that of his family. Another geezer was always banging on about the Regiment got done for thieving when a security guard he and his workmate cleared out some tills off to nick, broke his heart as he could not be a firefighter.
The moral of this story is some people are cunts and some are not, most times your gut instinct is right.
1
My grandfather was in 2 SAS during WWII. He never mentioned it. I remember asking him in the 70s did he kill any Germans. All he said was a few bullets hit home.
6
I’ve met one or two of these twats at pub bars over the years who claim to be ex SAS.
It was an open secret in our extended family that my mum’s cousin was in the SAS and that he worked in close protection for wealthy oil Sheikhs in the 80’s and 90’s after leaving the army but nobody ever asked him about it and he never spoke about it.
As a side note, one of my work mates actually tried to attribute a famous Winston Churchill quote to some anonymous uncle of his without realising it was a really famous quote.
4
SAS impersonators may have a similar motivation to that of used car salesman Simon in the movie True Lies. He used an undercover spy schtick to get gullible milfs into the cot.
Gain from false pretences.
As was the scam where they substituted cheap carp eggs under the name of Caspian sturgeon. No legislation outlawed the misrepresentation and it was purely a matter of caviar emptor.
1
It’s not just military walts you’ve got to watch out for.
The amount of people I’ve had claim to have been a roadie for famous bands is off the charts, off the top of my head over the years I’ve met roadies for Queen, Oasis, Rolling Stones, Black Sabbath, Motley Crue, Metallica, Def Leppard, Led Zeppelin, Cream, the Beatles, Runaways, Ramones, Poison, AC/DC and many, many more.
3
When I was a kid, the gentle old guy who had the allotment next to my father’s patch would talk about how things were in the old days. No talk of the war but always highly entertaining.
One day, some louts were walking across the allotments shouting and pulling up the odd plant. On reaching his allotment, one of them said “Fuck off” after being challenged by this 60 something doddery old guy.
When the police arrived 20 minutes later, one had a broken jaw, another was unconscious and two were crying like babies. This man’s only complaint was the broken spade.
No action taken.
When I attended his funeral some years later, the truth of his military background came out.
A true gent.
9
I’ve never seen any action and never come across any SAS imposters, but I’ve had the honour of doing my STAB phase 2 with Para instructors when they moved the normal Catterick TA phase 2 to Lichfield in 2002. I was 17/18 and at my fittest, but these Paras were like machines.
We had a lad with us (a fellow Kings & Cheshire) who claimed to be an ex-Para right through his phase 1 and even had the front to do his phase 2 at Lichfield with us.
Well the instructors found out all about it the night before we passed out, whilst sharing a beer in the naafi.
We heard his screems and I hope they made a mess of the cunt.
Sad lonely cunt.
0