Parking Obsessed Neighbours

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Parking Obsessed Neighbours Are Cunts.

Fucking morons who deliberately box you in and think they actually own the bit of road outside their house. One cretin just said to me,oh i’m allowed to park outside my neighbours house because he’s given me permission,IF you don’t move i’ll call the ‘ol bill. Fucking dull,useless cunts,i wish I could live in a detached gaff with no cunts for 20 miles in all directions. I’m becoming a Sociopathic Cunt in my 60’s.It’s not me, it’s all the other CUNTS.

Now get outta my fucking sight!

Nominated by Twinkletwat

24 thoughts on “Parking Obsessed Neighbours”

  1. Spot on cunting. Cunts who put cones outside their house’s grate my arse. Who the fuck do they think they are. You don’t own the roads you ignorant cunts.
    Fuck off and die.

    • The street where I live is cuntishly narrow. Those of us with cars have tiny little ones. fiat 500, mini, smart type cunty cars. We do that so that we canall safely navigate in and out and not be a cunt to each other. All except Mrs. Cunt and her Range Rover Evoque (with a private registration). Consideration for others is quite cheap. CUNTsideration costs everyone loads.

    • Early morning I stop when I see cones and wheelie bins blocking spaces. What do I do? MOVE THE FUCKING THINGS.

    • Just had a major meltdown in my street with parking obsessed cone cunts opposite.They moved in 4 months ago and have been intimidating and frightening some of the residents.Old boy been there 40 years and is scared to park for fucks sake. We collected all the cones up and slung them over a wall into a disused yard.14 year old poxy Honda, you’d think it was a New Porsche or summat. Dirty CUNTS…..Fuck them!

  2. It’s a fucking public highway unless it’s in a controlled parking zone . No right to permit anyone to oark or prevent anycunt from parking. Oh and also cunts… if you’ve a driveway but no drop kerb it is perfectly legal to oark right across it. Saw one eastern European cunt recently had painted a white box outside his six in a block with wall paint ( not plastic road paint) with his house number in the middle as if this was a fucking unilateral declaration of owned public realm

    It was burnt off immediately the cunt

    • Very good point Cuntflap. My only fear with this is finding that my jam jar had been keyed on return.

      • Then they are stupid cunts Quis because they are making offenders of the very owners by preventing the driveway owner of parking across their own driveway either to wash car or maintain the surface or if family members visit whereby they would have no objection to parking over exit.

      • Yep!!
        We have light touch parking here, so for 1 hour twice a day bays are resident permit holders only, it’s definitely helped as parking was complete Cunt!!
        Last week the council took a 3 car bay and turned it into a bicycle stand for their PAYG cycles!!! Absolute Cunts…. nobody fucking uses them…….
        😡

    • Very true , only blocking access to the public highway is illegal. However, blocking someone in and fucking, certainly if over my drive, will see the owner of that car needing 4 new tyres and a new paint job when they return.

  3. I feel your rage Twinkletwat. Only the other day Mrs. Cunter and I parked in front of someones very nice detached bungalow. When we returned, the aged residents were just going out in their car, which narrowly missed my wife as they drove off, glaring at us.
    In retaliation she shat on their doorstep, whilst I set fire to their wheely bins.
    Festering old cunts.
    Well nominated.
    Good afternoon.

    • These Cone Cunts? Well get a big lump of stinking “Dog Rope”..turn the cone upside down and ram in into the bottom.Invariably folks pick up cones by inserting a finger into said hole.Hey presto…Dog Shite under the finger nails.Plenty of scope for variation on the Cone Fouling Routine.Engine oil..or mayhaps drain your dog’s anal glands and wipe that stuff around the top of the cone.

    • 66 me Mr Stroker.Just drove past a caravan sales and was suprised how cheap they are. If me and the ol lady ever part the ways…i’ll sell up my terraced dump, buy a caravan and plot up off grid. I hate every cunt lately,you seem ok though Strokster….for a Cunt that is….now Fuck Off.

  5. A very worthy nom….
    I used to get notes on the van about parking in front of people’s houses. I can understand the one’s about how they can’t see the road as they pull out which could be dangerous … they were always polite notes, and I always consider that when parking now, but there are cunts that just grumble that a van is parked outside their house. They can fuck off. I’ve got just as much right to park as anyone.
    ….You may own the house but not the fucking road you cunts!

  6. I call this Northern Parking Misery because every cunt lives in terraced houses in the north. My girlfriend, who lives in Yorkshire, doesn’t understand why I get the hump when I can’t park. I don’t want to leave my new car some distance away. It’s the north, ffs, I don’t want to find it stood on bricks. Best avoid that part of the country.

    P.s. I come from the NW before I get the usual northern hate mail!

    • I don’t worry about the thievery (I come from London, no tubes or busses to catch and besides, it’s all white people round here), no it’s the driving rain and stinging wind that I hate about having to park down the road 😁.

      ….though it is my own fault for renting a house smack bang on a roundabout I suppose.

  7. Some years ago I was tootling through a pleasant spot overlooking Lake Zurich when I missed a turn and dared to reverse on a tiny bit of grass that some grumpy old Swiss thought was sacred. He came running down from his chalet, shouting, swearing and waving his fists. I waited patiently for him to arrive and asked very politely what the problem was. He ranted away and when he finished I answered in Swiss German but as my words went unheard, I then told him to “Halt die Klappe”. This just means “Shut your gob” but it only served to boil his blood further so I added “Figg di” which means “Fuck off”. I then revved up, making sure to cover him in exhaust fumes and zoomed off across his precious grass to the nearest cozy Bierstuebli.

    Having said that, I love Switzerland and (most of) the Swiss but there is an ingrained streak of bossiness and selfishness which they regard as citizenship. As someone once said – my dear wife, actually – anything that is not forbidden in Switzerland is allowed but almost everything is forbidden.

  8. My fat ugly cunt bitch of a niegbour will park across the front of my car even when there is a free space next to it she could park, but nooooo this cunt wants to make an issue out of it, so on facecunt, so now its a regular call to the police when this happens and believe it or not she still does it,i have tried knocking on her door but she says she felt bullied, so rather than give this fucking moose the opportunity to accuse me of anything its safer to call the police on this cunt, so they can tell her to move and that she is a cunt…..

  9. Nothing much to say about parking spaces: I keep the bike off the road, and the neighbours (sfter a certain amount of unpleasantness) are pretty good about allowing me to get it out of the side gate. However, There’s an incipient cunting for a matter raised by the illustration. Huge, mass-produced fibreglass animals, covered in eye-flinching patterns from a surrealist curtain catalogue, planted at random locations in every population centre in the country. Simple question: WHY?

    Possible answer…gigantic anatomically correct illuminated fibreglass CUNTS similarly scattered across the urban landscape.

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