Vanity

This is not so much a ‘cunting’ as a ‘moroning’ but shows that people’s vanity, mixed with myopic levels of naivety, can be both stupid AND fatal.

Last year, Washington D.C. couple Jay Austin and Lauren Geoghegan decided to cycle round the Globe. They were imbued by both a desire to see the the World as well as proving their faith in humanity, even the more dangerous places.

They decided to write a blog about their experiences and took endless photos for their Instagram page. This was nothing to do with vanity and bragging but so others could constantly view their cycling achievements and share in their endless holidaying.

They eventually cycled through Central Asia and some dodgy desert countries. Hmm, a tad dangerous, but not for our blindly naive,short-sighted millennials. What could go wrong? Well…

Let’s have a round of ISAC Gamehow, shall we? Question 1:

Last month while in Tajikistan, do you think they:

a.) Experienced culture shock that would stretch their minds and eventually strengthen their characters?

b.) Enjoyed a refreshing welcome from the open-minded locals who believed in free speech and democracy?

c.) Got brutally murdered by being stabbed after being run off the road by ISIS terrorists?

I’ll give you ten seconds….

Now click here for the answer

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous

38 thoughts on “Vanity

  1. It was a tough one till I got to C.

    Not just vanity but sheer unbridled naivety. Naturally both worked for government or government funded organisations because their dog piss collage degrees from dog piss college were not good enough for a job in the real world so they stay in la la land all their worthless lives.

    Won’t be missed.

    • I think the only “gentle breezes” those two would have experienced would have been the hopeless farts wafting around between their earholes.

      A positive result.

  2. Nice one, Cap’n.
    Whilst I’m not necessarily glad that this pair of spastics got murdered, the world is probably still a better place without bell-ends like these in it.
    Can you imagine how leftie progressive they were. Limp as an empty glove, always trying to see the best in third world savages and religious maniacs.
    In fact, I’ll change my opinion; I *am* glad they’re dead.
    Fuck them, as (the missing in action) Dick Fiddler used to say.

    • At least they never bred, I would encourage more snowflakes to engage in such activities. This should be a game on ISAC, where will some pratish millennial snowflake meet a grisly end next?

    • 100% Mr Cunt Engine – with any luck this cycling through Tajikistan wheeze will become the millennial snowflake version of the 1970s ‘hippie trail’ where young cunts spent their gap year ‘finding themselves’ by mooching their way through Iran, Afghanistan, Pakistan, India and Nepal, before ‘finding themselves’ in Turkish jails getting their feet beaten and their ringpieces ripped.

      Not my cup of tea, I chose the office boy route instead.

      Btw, Fiddler missing in action? I don’t think so. Multiple postings sighted yesterday…

      Y’all have a nice weekend.

  3. Fuck me this is a tricky one and not wanting to look like a thick cunt I’ve just done a little research on Tajikistan……

    Google….
    is Tajikistan a safe place to travel?
    Some factional fighting has been spilling over from Afghanistan as well as some local warlordism , visitors should stay abreast of the security situation and NOT take unnecessary risks……. ( they don’t specifically mention aimlessly cycling around but I’m pretty sure that meets all the unnecessary requirements)

    Now I’ve done 20 seconds of research I’m definitely going with C captain…….

    C = Cunts………

    • Maybe ISIS terrorists just have an issue with cyclists. It’s understandable. I know I do.

  4. I must be a right fucking cunt because this story just made me laugh. Pair of fucking idiots. Ooooh, if you are nice to people they will be nice back to you. Yeah, nice idea but you don’t have to travel to some mental 3rd world shithole to have that shoved up your arse. There are plenty of places in London you won’t catch me after dark and, coming from the USA, there are plenty of places they could have tested their dimmo theory and maybe got away with a stabbing or a shooting and lived to tell the tale.
    No, these cunts had to go to the land of the peacefuls who we all know are the victims and if you be nice to them they will recognise your neoliberal greatness and cover you with garlands of flowers.
    No, these wankers get no sympathy from me. You fell for the bullshit so fuck you.

  5. Oh, and I seem to remember the first time I read about these innocents abroad it said they were vegans. Well there’s a fucking surprise!
    No doubt their friends held a candlelight vigil for them with Lily fucking Allen, or whatever the Yank equivalent is, playing in the background.
    Obviously it was Trump’s fault.

    • Well…
      How do you tell the difference between a vegan and a cunt?
      Ha.
      Trick question…
      They’re the same thing.

      (Sorry, I’m still quite, quite, drunk)

  6. Masterfully cunted cap as usual.
    Tajikistan chicken is about as foreign as I go… and about the only thing that tadjikistan.. (?) … whoever
    … has ever given the world.
    Shame the days have gone where we can’t just beat the cunts up and make em do what we want.

    If those cunts really wanted to see foreign culture they could’ve stayed in London and walked round the corner … at least they could’ve called the pigs when the inevitable happened.

    I genuinely feel sorry for these people. I genuinely feel bad that cyclists can’t even make it HALF WAY round the world before someone does them in.

    …..there seems to be some dark horrible side of me though that… Ha h*ahem, h.. uhum…

    No

    ….. h h hummnm…

    No. Aherm. Huh…

  7. Maybe next week a millennial couple will cycle through the Serengeti National Park to prove the inhabitants aren’t wild just simply misunderstood?

  8. Funnily enough I saw a sickening video yesterday which identifies how self-loathing the West has become of itself in deference to the much more deserving ethnic (but not for much longer) minorities.

    The thing is, the excuses these snowflakes give for loving everyone (apart from their own) and cultures (apart from their own) are so shallow and so vapid, you just know that they have grown up and have only known a highly privileged lifestyle protected from the reality of knowing that outside of modern western and far eastern cultures, most of the rest of the world (Middle East, Africa and South America) is made up of dangerous shitholes.

    Moreover, when you take a cunt out of a dangerous shithole and plonk them in a leafy suburb of London, LA, Melbourne or Toronto, does that cunt immediately think/behave like the society they have just entered or do they retain the self-preservation mindset of the shithole they’ve just left?

    Exactly!

    Now imagine that there are 1,000’s of the cunts invading (because it is an invasion) the west, still with a dangerous shithole mindset, but who now have the numbers so’s not to be bothered by the notion of their adopted nation’s law and order! It’s an invading army except instead of wearing camouflage and jack boots it’s Nike and Kangols!

    And yet flakes (like the Darwin Award winners above) will excuse the behaviour of these fucking animals (sorry, that’s what they are) to the point of murder and will scream and shout to prevent their criminal (and often murderous) arses from being arrested and/or ejected from that country.

    If you saw a person holding a gun to their own heads threatening to pull the trigger, you’d have them locked up for being mentally unbalanced and a danger to themselves.

    Well the flakes’ mindset is no different when it comes to shithole immo cunts! They should be locked up because they’re not only a danger to themselves but to EVERYONE else in that society also!

    Moreover because these doss flake cunts are often from privileged backgrounds, their altruism doesn’t affect their way of life (until the very end of that society) but it fucking affects ordinary people who have to suffer the disastrous consequences of their”rose tinted” view of these “poor people”!

    I recommend you watch the following video (before it gets suppressed by the tech Stasi) just to see how bad the self-loathing of the west has become to the point where even when a man’s daughter is murdered by one of these shithole scumbags he *STILL* appeases the fuckers!?! The cunt should be locked up!

    As a father myself I’d want the immo cunt’s head on a platter and his entire family immediately ejected from my country!

    Please also note towards the end of the video the poor and desperate starving “refugee FAMILIES” (hah) just waiting to further enrich western culture.

    And by “refugee FAMILIES” I mean a horde of fighting age, fit, surly looking sub-saharan Africunt men itching to lay waste to yet another town/city in Europe (courtesy of “crimes against humanity” Merkelcunt and the traitor Blair).

    You know, the invasion horde that the AL-BEEB and Sly never manage to report on!

    Cunts!

    https://youtu.be/NPJCV4uKIWI

  9. Well to be fair to them they wanted to see the real world, and by fuck did they see it!

    This is the reality those dumb libtard millennial fuck-ups choose to ignore; preferring instead to see the world through happy-clappy glasses where everyone is friendly and not at all evil or remotely right of centre.

    But step outside the comfort zone and they quickly realise reality has a habit of kicking in you in the balls/cunt and you pay dearly for being so fucking naive- and there is no one to blame other than yourself and your brainwashed mindset.

    Inevitably of course, like all libtards, they will apportion blame on everyone other than themselves. It will be Trump, it will be Brexit, it will be WASPs, All their fault and not the stupid libtards, because the libtards know best.

    Fuck ’em!

  10. This excellent and disturbing Cunting has really made me think. So much so that I have decided not to vote for Jeremy Corbyn at the next Election.

  11. If only we could somehow persuade more lycra clad twats to take a detour through ISIS infested shiteholes instead of clogging up our roads.

    • I have always had a yen for Anthony Blair and Peter Mangledbum to ride on a tandem through the streets of Saudi Arabia, both as pissed as a fart, and to enjoy the following ten Fridays to see them get 100 lashes each week. If these two motherfuckers are too scared, I would gladly accept Chukup (“call off the dogs, I’m a black snowflake”) Ummuna and Gina Miller to take their place, or Bob Geldof and Vince Cable – the permutations are endless the idea delightful.

      As for the two cyclists, I actually think it sad two adults can be so naive and so misguided. They were nowhere near as dangerous and obnoxious as Putin and the EU gestapo though

  12. I really hope this sorry tale gets made into a film, brainless cunts banging tambourines singing kumbaya spreading peace and love across the world from the benefit of their safe spoilt middle class life get brutally butchered by illiterate low IQ subhumans in some third world shithole.

    I love happy endings, I would definitely watch it.

  13. I do hope that the poor cyclists went down,not fighting,but with a rousing chorus of “Don’t look back in Anger” as they furiously pedalled in a vain attempt to escape their Peaceful perforation. Can’t be easy holding the high notes while your throat is being slit.
    These Cunts deserved everything they got. I just hope that the killers remembered to trash the fucking pedal-bikes too, before they discover that they can’t get their baby-daughters to the brothel because their roads are blocked by red-faced,wheezing,dodgy-looking middle-aged bumders in lycra blocking their roads.

    Peace be upon you.
    Fuck Off.

    • Is that really you Dick?

      There’s a rumour going round that you’re actually Kravdarth’s alter ego. What a mess. No one knows what to believe any more.

      Good morning (assuming it’s you).

      • Shalom…. I’ve just booked an intimate table for two at Parkside Kosher Restaurant on Grovelands Rd. London….care to join me? Who knows where it could lead?
        Yours,quivering in anticipation…

        The Kriddler.

      • Ha ha, you can’t fool me Krav!

        Your kind offer finds me severely tempted, but sadly must decline as I am currently grounded till further notice in Sandringham House by order of your great heroine the Queen, despite promising the old trout I would desist in snorting speed in Kings’s Cross lavatory again.

        God bless The Queen!

        God bless the state of Israel!

        God bless President Trump!

  14. I see the music giant Mac Miller has tragically died from an overdose of an illegal substance.

    Famous purely for boffing the queen of grief-jacking herself – Ariana Grande – the world’s musical cream is unified in their pontification of this “genius”.

    Yes the household name Mac Miller. I wonder if he had a blue book and a white book too?

    Ariana – no doubt too distressed to speak herself – will likely release a press statement looking forward to a nice lift in sales of her latest album.

    —-

    And in other news…

    Extreme “tig” (or “tag” – depending on where in the UK you are from) is now an official sport – as reported by the AL-BEEB today.

    The participants climb, jump over, duck under and avoid various obstacles in an indoor arena set up to mimic urban areas as they are chased by the other participants.

    The new sport has the full backing of the UK government as it will help train the indigenous population the necessary skills for their ‘Run, Hide, Tell!” campaign, thus negating any need to actually deal with “peaceful” terrorism.

    So long as Cuntminster is safe, HM’s Govt is happy.

    • See it. Say it. Sorted. Tag it.

      If you fall over playing this cruel sport, it’s all part of living in a modern city.

  15. A sobering tale tis true, as earlier comments suggest we may be witnessing evolution in action. I suggest that the advances in medical treatment, education, public health etc. in the “civilised” World has led to an increasing number of fuckwit liberals who seem to think that everyone they meet is like them. Transported away from their safe and sound environment where drinking tap water is safe, men can be women and vice versa anything goes and control is bad they then have the awful realisation that most of the World is a shit hole and no one gives two fucks about global warming. They then get murdered by some goat fuckers whose excuse is “Ubelievers must die” when the sordid simple truth is that most of the goat fuckers wanted to fuck western woman and one most likely wanted to do same to the male member of party and the bikes would look nice as part of a goat pen. The murder was carried out afterwards to ensure no one left to tell on them.
    Thus having unwordly halfwit ideas is bad for your health outside your safe bubble. In conclusion I would state that the mindset of the cyclists regarding their view of goat fucking humanity and humanity in general was at odds with the environment they found themselves in so as per the theory of evolution they became dead.
    How or why in the name of all the Gods would anyone want to cycle through the arsehole of the World I mean just go for a pedal in south London at least the medical facilities are OK.

    • South London is dodgy in places Black Biscuit but I reckon Tajikistan might be a bit safer than East London. Bicycles (like British people) haven’t been seen there for years.

      • I live a long way from Tajikistan, a long way from London come to that, and I wouldn’t walk down our street after ten o’clock at night. I wouldn’t describe these people as naive, I’d call them thick as pig shit. Asked for and got.

  16. It seems to be a disease that infects runners in particular. I do one of those parkrun things on a Saturday and every time there’s a cavalcade of people with their running club t shirts or finisher t shirts and crap like that. Oh, you finished a marathon – good for you but I’m not interested in hearing about it. You did tough mudder – again, good for you because that shit is hard. But the world doesn’t need to know about it.

  17. Mussolini said that the 1930s was the decade of fascism… Well, the 2010s are the decade of narcissism…. And one is amazed at how many there are…. Not just the usual suspect celebrislags who have ‘hacked’ (Ye-ahhh right!) pics of their norks and jizz covered fizzogs all over the web.. That’s only to be expected from slags and celebriwhores like Lawrence, Gaga, and Johansscunt… But the amount of so-called ‘ordinary’ people who have also been sucked up by this ‘phenomenon’ is frightening…. Every other cunt now takes ‘selfies’ of themself and posts them on Twatter, Facefook, or Instacunt…. Social media and technology may kid these narcissistic cunts into believing they are ‘beautiful’, but in actual fact it has shown just how ugly and self obsessed a lot of people actually are….

    And as for the celebrislags who encourage this behaviour? The slappers and Hollywood tramps who knowingly flash their baps all over the web and then say it’s ‘my body’ and it’s their ‘right’ to be a vain slag with no class, they should think on this… Did Deborah Kerr ever do it? Did Leslie Caron do it? Did Audrey Hepburn do any such thing? No, and they didn’t have to… Classless is as classless does and true class will always out… But most ‘actresses’ and celebrislags nowadays are totally lacking in it…. Rich as fuck. but cheap as chips…

  18. I love a quiz and I love the feeling of smugness if I get one correct, I also like it if the quiz master has a sense of humour. This quiz ticks all of those boxes. What a great quiz and what a great cunting.

  19. I second cuntsince, a great quiz, a great cunting and a great result. If only it could happen to all cyclists that I have to give room for when driving and have to dodge when I’m a pedestrian on the park. What utter naive cunts thus proving that innocence is dangerous.

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