Urgh! As if it’s not enough to have to out up with irritating self righeous and selfish cyclists clogging up the roads in summer with unnecessary 2 or 3 abreast riding or riding down single lane country roads to annoy everyone, on Sunday they’re going to shut a frankly incredible about of roads for a cycling event whose apparent remit is blatant self promotion.
Who the fuck has the right to close all of these roads? Are we going to be compensated? What if someone has made plans? What if the emergency services can’t get there is time? Who the fuck cares apparently, it’s just another fly to swat in the path to cycling totalitarianism. We will all be do gooding middle aged middle class people, even if it kills us!
I just drove the A25 around to dorking and up to the M25 past Leatherhead, all of this will be closed. All of the A246 to Guildford, closed, that’s a massive stretch of road, there’s not much of an alternative, it will be a nightmare for those who couldn’t give 2 shits about cycling, and that s just a tiny bit of the route, it bloody goes all around into London!
Whoever organised this event, but even more whoever gave permission to fuck up a whole load of our roads for a vested interest. deserves a weighty and comprehensive cunting!
Nominated by Cunting Rank Wags
More than Mandelson, Campbell, Blair and May combined, is how much I hate cyclists. Thankfully, as the link between cycle saddles and infertility is now beyond doubt, hopefully only a minimal amount of these utter cunts will be breeding and those that do will have drooling mongs for offspring.
I reckon I’ve managed to reduce the gap I leave between my wing mirror and their arses as I thunder past in the awesome Toyota Carina to less than three inches every time, causing much receiving of wanker hand signals.
Death to them all, leftie cunts to a man (and wimminz).
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‘will have drooling mongs for offspring’…………well that’s the future House of Commons/Lords sorted then.
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Talking of drooling mongs, I appear to resemble my avatar more and more as the days pass.
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That’ll be the rage Moggie, Im also looking like mine more and more as the days go by. Whilst we’re on the subject, does anyone else have to keep typing in their details every time the post a comment? It’s getting on my tits. Admin..?!
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I am also looking more and more like my Avatar every day.
Went for a free health check today. Cholesterol level 3.8 (ok), blood sugar level 6 (right on the limit for being ok), blood pressure excellent. BMI just over 30 (too high) and needs to be 25 or below so ideally must lose about 12 kilos (which I know I can do). Currently 100kg with waist 100cms. Likelihood of heart attack (as non smoker, no alcohol, vegetarian) next 10 years 8%.
Mrs Stroker (on the other hand) strangely cholesterol higher than mine at 4.8. No sugar level given. Weight 49kg, waist 64cms and again excellent blood pressure. BMI 20. Likelihood of heart attack next 10 years 1%.
In perspective, highest likelihood next 10 years, doctor has seen many over 40% and a few over 50%, so 8% for my age (59) is I am reliably informed good. Looking ideally below 20%. 1% is the lowest she has ever seen (Mrs Stroker).
I am thinking that with all of the shit going on in this country I may well start smoking, drinking and eating lard in order to not prolong the agony longer than I have to.
Would also like to nominate myself for giving far more away about themselves than any other person on the site. If you are ever passing through Ipswich, just look for someone who looks like Oliver Hardy, it will probably be me.
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@ Cuntbubble
We all have to sign in manually now to comment. Did you miss the raging debate a couple of weeks ago? Nothing to do with admin apparently.
Remember: what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
Bullshit.
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Me to Cuntbubble. I get my name and email come up on my laptop but I have to type it in every time on my phone. Why the fuck do we have to this now ? Never used to ☹️
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An excellent, and much warranted cunting.
On the day I become supreme ruler of the world, I’ll bring out my list of all those cunts who are to be put up against the wall and shot. At the very top of the list are these sanctimonious cunts in their fucking ridiculous Spiderman outfits. They’re as welcome as a turd in a swimming pool, the fucking, arseholing twats. Cunts, every last one of them.
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How can decent law abiding citizens be expected to hold a nice traditional Pride parade with all these lycra clad fascists commandeering the road space?
Cunts.
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They should hold them at the same time. That way any lycra-clad,middle-aged stragglers who weakened could be dragged off for a richly deserved bumming off a bunch of over-aroused,mincing Willie-Woofters.
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Take away the bicycles and I doubt I could tell the two camps apart – they both dress in an irritating fashion, hold up the traffic, and abuse performance enhancing drugs.
And after those saddles have been up them, a spot of anal fisting would be neither here nor there.
Evening Dick.
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Lycra is so fuckin camp, but what amuses me is these cunts who wear tights or jogging bottoms under there shorts. Other than looking like Batman They look total wankers and it doesn’t seem to serve any purpose.
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Well fuck me. I had to comment on this little beauty of a cunting. What in the name of all that’s fucking holy do these cunts think they’re playing at. Firstly the utter pricks who arranged this shit fest and second (and by no means least) the Lycra Cunts taking part in it. Makes me wish my name was Mohamed and I had a fucking great white van
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There is a half marathon held every year in Ipswich. Sponsored by an accountancy firm (or a solicitors, I forget which). It is held on a Sunday.
This involves the closure of several roads in the area, with marshals at strategic junctions/crossroad barriers to let cars cross when clear of runners.
Last year my wife left for work at just after 8.30am, a good while before the race was due to start. She returned approximately ten minutes later, saying she was blocked in and unable to get out, specifically past either of the three barriers (to three different roads, which were all unmanned). I went in the car with her, removed one of the barriers and she continued on her way whilst I walked back home. There was also a nurse in her car coming in the opposite direction who was on her way to a patient and was unable to get inside the area.
Later that day saw and complained to one of our neighbours (knew he was a marathon runner but did not realise he was involved in some way with the race). His advice to me was that the night before we should have parked our car half a mile away the other side of the barriers.
If he had not been a neighbour would have seriously told him to fuck off, and that the organisers should not look to inconvenience the residents and work with them, not the other way round. Suggested that they had marshals at road crossing points as soon as the barriers were erected as some people had to go to work. Also mentioned that if had done as he suggested, if anything had happened to our car, it is most likely that our insurers would decline our claim as not parked on our driveway (as we have stated to them we do when at home and a condition of our insurance). He failed to give a satisfactory response to this, and whether we would be compensated in this eventuality.
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Although not pushbikes,pretty much the same thing……a fella up here came home after working on a Saturday to discover that the road to his,admittedly remote, home was taped off. When he stopped,two officious Cunts had stepped from behind the tape and told him that no spectators or cars were allowed through and that he should basically turn around and Fuck Off. He tried to explain to them that he lived a couple of miles up the lane,had paid his road-tax, and was going home. Cut no ice with “Security”…”too bad,you got a notice through the door,should have been through an hour before etc.”
Unluckily for “Security”,they were dealing with a,by now, highly excitable timber-cutter in a Hilux. Red warning tape,bollards and lanyarded Busybodies were left upended in his wake as he proved their assertions that he couldn’t go through totally wrong. He apparently had no bother whatsoever.
The rally stage was cancelled….Served the Cunts right.
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Even ordinary cyclists hate the lycroids, I found out the other day. I welcome the opportunity to expand on the subject further. Closing any part of the M25 must surely necessitate Project Fear’s lorry-chaos-at-Dover apocalypse becoming fact? Let alone paralysing swathes of Londonistan. Brexit’s going to hit just-in-time logistice, and this isn’t? Pull the other one. And yet I just know that all lycroids voted Remain.
It’s a measure of the government’s slobbering devotion to the finance industry that this was even contemplated, let alone implemented. Lycroid cunts. Prudential cunts. And no doubt Sadiq fucking Khant cunt.
On the bright side, it may mean a few days without the ultra-lycroids round here: I’ve had to divert en route to work since April in order to permit a ridiculously short road-widening operation to take place. One of whose objectives is to, quote, make it safer to overtake cyclists. Personally, I’d narrow the fucking road and run a ditch full of industrial waste and crocodiles* along both edges…
*noble beasts.
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Fancy a ride to London on the motorbikes Komodo?! My gixxer has just been tuned up and is ready for some lycra ten pin bowling
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I am so pissed off after the week’s commuting I just want to go for long walks in the country when I’m off, I’m afraid. And I have a sentimental attachment to my license and freedom. Sorry.
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A motor bike right?
What is a “naked” motorcycle, and what is “Fully Faired”?
Sorry, haven’t got much of a clue when it comes to bikes (or many other things now I come to think about it)..
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Fully faired has the extra ‘bodywork’ around the engine and underneath. Naked would be without.
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What gixxer do you have, CB?
I’ve got a 97 SRAD 750
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Hi Thomas, I’ve got a 750 gixxer at the moment. Had a 1000 but it was too much like hard work. Also just got an SV 650 sport for commuting. Love SRAD’s, they always sound the nuts. Nice to ride as well I bet?
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Oh yeah, bit too slow though, even with a full Harris system and a power commander…but then, I am “coming down” from a Gixxer 1260 turbo (1991 gixxer ‘L’ with most of a Hayabusa engine and a turbo, 220 rear wheel bhp, sold for tax reasons (owed cunting HMRC 5k, robbing cunts).
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Boy fined £500 for kicking dog to death in St Ives.
A 15-year-old boy has been fined £500 for punching and kicking a “much-loved” pet dog to death.
The boy, who cannot be named, was 14 when the “prolonged attack” happened in St Ives, Cornwall on 31 October.
He was found guilty of causing unnecessary suffering to a protected animal last month after a two-day trial.
The teenager has been banned from keeping animals for five years and ordered to pay £500 compensation.
Why can’t the evil little fucker be named? And why can’t he be banned from keeping animals until there isn’t a breath left in his pathetic body? Abnormal behaviour- drown the little bastard now. He’s only going to get worse.
Fucking cunt
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More cuntdom.
Saudi Arabia seeks death penalty against female activists for ‘participating in protests’.
All the Boris bedwetters are you there? Hello? Hello……?
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Needs to be kept an eye on the little cunt. Will graduate to people by the time he is 20 most likely, fucking psychopath
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Have patience Willie – I’m sure he’ll be named in a few years time, once he graduates to become the next Ian Brady.
“Justice will prevail and all the morally upright will be vindicated.”
(Psalm 94:15)
Yeah yeah…
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Reubke’s Sonata on the 94th Psalm is one of my all-time favourites. He was a pupil of Liszt, and possibly more gifted.
Some great performances on youtube.
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A few weeks ago I was sat at the lights in a right turn lane on a dual carriageway, in the opposite right turn lane was a lycra encased epsilon minus cunt, for whom traffic lights were an unnecessary inconvenience . The silly twat decided to go through the red light and was very nearly taken out by the oncoming traffic on the other carriageway , which had hurtled from the other set of lights a couple of hundred yards away like a formula 1 grid on the last day of the season. Lycra man shit himself, he’ll never come closer to death without checking out.
I laughed.
Good afternoon.
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Funniest thing I ever saw was a cyclist try and undertake a bus as it pulled in to a stop.
He nearly made it… Nearly.
Lycra clad knob jockey pinned under the front of the bus and under it’s own bike no less.
When they driver got out to check if the spandex clad road warrior was OK, he got a mouthful of abuse and a couple of kicks from the two wheeled psychopath’s one free leg.
Obviously not one to take being called a cunt and take a bruised shin laying down, the bus driver then proceeded to administer a fucking good kicking of his own to the trapped cyclist.
You really had to see it. Comedy gold. 😁
Back on topic.
Two years back I went to visit the parents and it took an hour to get to the Hammersmith one way system, such was the traffic mayhem.
I ended up turning round and going back home, which is less than a mile away.
These cunts actually block off the bottom of my road and bisect London to the point you can’t get from North to south.
Bring on the truck of peace!
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Maybe there is a god?
Enjoyed turning left out of a side road in front of an approaching lycrrhoid today. Had to wait, though, to ensure he had to slow down for me for a change.
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Politicians, from Downing Street to the local council , make these kind of shithead decisions all the time. They don’t give a fuck about the impact on ordinary people just making themselves look good.
No doubt some councillor ponce appeared in all the local rags droning on about “green issues” , “healthy lifestyles”, “family activities” blah blah.
Just shut it cunt.
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Thank you cunters for another reminder why I don’t miss Londistan.
I also hate these virtue-signalling snowflake cunt events which allows participants to post their stupid bearded faces on Facefuck or Instacunt. I now live in the Highlands where I see loads of these cunts as tourists, all VW campervans and Cunt-UVs. They all have the gear but I never see these cunts actually in the mountains. Millenials are utter cunts.
Countless times, I nearly came to blows with one of these bearded, lycra-clad cunts when I was living in London. Problem is, like their gender, these cunts have a fluid approach to being a road user or a pedestrian. And yet there has be a day of mourning when one of these cunts is killed in a RTA.
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Lycra-clad, shaved-leg ponces.
And a bunch of fucking cheats too, turbo-charged as they are by gas blasts from the Lucarse Green high-fibre diet. Evil-smelling, soiled, two-wheeled mongs.
I hope that a ropey puts on a good kerbside demo of tolerance, diversity and cultural enrichment for their delight and delectation.
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Lycra-clad, shaven-leg arsewipes.
And a bunch of fucking cheats, turdo-charged as they are by gas blasts from the Lucarse Green high-fibre diet. Evil-smelling, soiled two-wheeled mongs.
I hope a ropey puts on a good kerbside demo of tolerance, diversity and cultural enrichment as they all wank their way past
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Aaaaah – maybe using the word **nce has been automatically barring my attempt to post…
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Sub-human African gimmegrunts arriving on Ceuta, and chucking battery acid and caustic quicklime at security guards…
Just gun the bastards down. If that’s how they behave on landing, what are they going to be like in 6 months time ??
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