Winter Olympics – and the BBC

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The Winter Olympics on the Beebistan Broadcasting Corporation.

So it’s time again for the love in that is the Olympics, on BBC, the four yearly shitfest of sportspersons and activities you’ve never actually heard of. The Winter Olypmics is a particular favourite.

Curling. Polishing some Ice with a brush so a fucking great stone can slide along it. Not taking a good shit, as I wrongly assumed. Appears to be done by Scottish dikes and Norwegians.

Moguls. Strapping ski planks to your feet and sliding down a bumpy slope covered in snow. Looks like a good way to have a stint in A&E to me.

Snowboarding. An excuse for a bunch of ‘right on’ lefty snowflakes to get a free holiday and wear ludicrous clothes whilst hacking on about half pipes, twists and catching air. Grow up you fucktards.

And finally good old Claire Balding, every cunts favourite lesbian who told us yesterday that she would be ‘doing the show’ from Salford, because it’s 4am in Korea and it’s very cold. No shiting Claire, is that why they call it the ‘winter’ Olympics?

Nominated by Leonardo Di Cunty.

Eurgh the tedium of the Winter Olympics. I only had it on accidentally and within 2 minutes I wanted to slit my own throat.

This thing is only on TV so that the new rich semi-intelligent/conscious middle classes can pretend they’re interested in sports. They can then use this discussion of “real world events” to distract from their small time dynasty building for their spoiled vomitous liberal offspring.

Its so fucking boring. Its like bingo in atmosphere and excitement. What is the point apart from some humanist celebration of bullshit. Who gives a shit if someone can skii or ice skate quicker than someone else? What good did it do anyone?

Their are numerous criticisms because of “tribalism” in football and other sports, but that’s because people give a shit! Because it’s exciting! Opening another bottle.of wine never gave meaning to anything.

One day when there isn’t a global media vacuum waiting for arbitrary sports to fill its schedules for the media spoon fed middle classes, this wank will.be forgotton, and sports like curling and skiing will be left to whatever local mutants have the spare time and inclination to do it. And good luck to them, its probably fun, but fun isn’t necessarily interesting to watch, so it doesn’t mean it should be on TV globally. A shitting contest would frankly be more interesting, and get a more focused audience.

So fuck the winter olympics and the cunts who watch it. There is always something better to do unless you are a brain dead moron who thinks its sport you can watch and be discussed over dinner and wine and not be embarrased about because lower class people watch it, like football or snooker.

Nominated by Cunting Rank Wags

29 thoughts on “Winter Olympics – and the BBC”

  1. The Winter Olympics. What a total bore fest . Does anyone actually watch it ? Talk about watching paint dry. I’m sorry if i upset other Cunters that are into these activities , I suppose its more interesting than watching Golf, indoor Bowls or Fat bastards playing Darts.

  2. Skiing is what cunts do on holiday. Going downhill on a tea tray is what kids do.
    Unless you live in fucking Norway this pile of shite has no relevance.
    Top notch cuntings. Was going to cunt it myself but would have had to watch 30 seconds or so first and that is above and beyond the call of cunting.

  3. Sorry to say Mrs Stroker and I must clearly both cunts as very much enjoy watching most sports including both Summer and Winter Olympics.

    Pretty much the only sports left on BBC these days, they have managed to lose almost everything else (cricket and golf).

    Mrs Stroker a most excellent and proficient skier, I too have strapped some planks of wood onto my feet a few times however the way I ski might as well just be planks of wood. Not far off being categorised as a completely useless fucker but what can I expect if only five times in 59 years.

    Fresh mountain air, sunshine, great scenery, good exercise and great food and drink. What’s not to like, apart from the cost. Last time in 2003 for a weeks skiing in Whistler for the week £6k.

    Hoping to go to the 2022 Tokyo summer Olympics.

    And yes, as rightly stated by Shitcake also enjoy watching indoor bowls.

  4. Well at least the fucking BBC didn’t spend a shitload of our money sending the Lezzer and a load of hangers on over to Korea.
    But that can only be because none of the freeloaders wanted to go……too fucking cold and there’s a good chance you might unknowingly be eating dog. Not to mention the prospect of Fat Boy Kim dropping a fucking great bomb on the cunts.

    • Yes if Madeline had gone missing in Oslo I doubt plod would be so quick to go back there every other winter for a jolly!

  5. Great fun to do, pain in the arse to watch, pissboiler listening to commentators becoming hysterical. Choice of events too limited. 3 persons in a big poly bag going down a ski run seeing how many plankers can be maimed in the process is also fun,to do (personal experience) and probably fun to watch. More imagination please.

  7. There are too many events in the winter Olympics that are not sports.
    Anything that involves judging or style marks based on someone elses’ opinion immediately rules it out as competitive sport.

    Who the fuck wants to watch ice skating?
    Commentators getting wet knickers cos some cunt does a triple toe loop or a double salco, it all looks the fucking same. It’s just some cunt jumping up in the air.
    Blokes who skate just look like benders on ice.

    Curling, although no judges involived is just a rock, a broom, weird shoes and shouting.

    Snowboarding, blokes in their thirties dressed like their fourteen screaming about big air.

    Ski jumping, where you can jump the furthest but might not win, so what’s the fucking point.

    Waiting for an avalanche….

  8. The winter Olympics remind me of that national fucking embarrassment Eddie the eagle Edwards who found fame and probably fortune for coming last. Yep, a British sporting hero who took part in 1 event and comes last.

    I fucking hate it, all that snow and ice. There are plenty of sports played through winter that don’t involve snow or ice. Why can’t they have more variety. Snooker, basketball, football etc

    • With a total medal haul of less than 25 since 1913, considering one Dutch bird has half of all that and she is under 30 – how much more of Fucking waste do the press, or any cunt waving a flag and wearing a hat made in China think the GB team tosspots actually stand. These cunts are the most over paid unemployed dead hopefuls around. Get a job u cunts.

  10. The real truth is coming from GB the only winter sport i know is getting rained off going down the pub and playing darts,table skittles and shove hapney and doing the slalom back home FFS
    And the only skiing i knew was if me and my mucker pulled the local drunken#pubslut champion doing the double!
    The geemans bild zeitung has gone into a wank fest of collosal proportions because they on are the leaderboard and i am not a great fan of football but when a newspaper puts the winter bollocks before the football because they won another one and two pages later football bundesliga then you know something is wrong
    Merkel will be dishing out snowfake crosses by the score for the injured WINTER OLYMPICS CUNTS and as goes for the olympics my brother put the best answer to the handicapped olympics and said to our mother THE OGIMPIC LAMES and she said “if your brother was like that you would be up in arms “QUOTE “CUNTS

  11. As much as I agree with this cunting, did do one on the manbeast balding myself, I have to say stop fucking moaning you cunters, always going on about Al Beeb ramming nig nogs down our throats and now we have hours and hours every day of blonde hair, white faced (mostly) athletes on our tellys that dear old Adolf would have been proud of. I’m loving it, apart from the cunt balding

    • Sorry balding. When I hear our favorite lesbian I go straight to pornhub and not the beeb for your inert waffling. U and that Perkins need to take Norton and fuck off under a rainbow.

  13. What grips my shit is the proposition that some athlete who has twisted its ankle and got knocked out of the running is a tragic hero/ine/ungendered suffix in whose existence is embodied the sufferings of the world.

    And see Battle of Kursk for perspective in the snow.

    • My extremely bad. I am a cunt. Kursk was in July and August, so the comparison with the Winter Olympics fails. Please read Battle of Stalingrad.

  14. Skiing.
    An exotic method of getting into a casualty ward without having to be involved in a fight or traffic accident.
    Like golf, only of use for advancing the plot in a Bond film.
    Jeremy Clarkson goes on skiing holidays.

    Fingers crossed…

    P.S. Am somewhat inebriated, and also impressed with myself for still being able to type “inebriated”

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