The Tank designed not to be used. Remember the poor sods in there.
This useless but highly expensive bastard has been around since the 1970s and is a mainstay of NATO forces. It is part of the immense German armaments industry (who knew they still had one ‘eh?) and at £4 million a pop supposed to be the last thing in such motors. Well they are so long as they remain oit orf combat. Talking about last things, the last thing the poor cunts crewing the bastards actually hear is indeed a pop followed by a sizzle then good night Vienna.
Have come to recent prominence because some dumb cunts ie the Turks have actually started to use them. Against fearsome opponents with state orf the art weaponry? Well a few clapped oit Toyota pick-ups with pipe mortars mounted in the back but supported by Blighty with whatever obsolete shite we can scrape together.
Thing is the Curds are blowing the shite oit orf ’em and that is not supposed to happen. £4 mill worth of armour plating reinforced with tungsten and depleted uranium. Twin diesels with a max orf 42mph (nippy for a tank). Very embarrassing. These dodgy motors are the mainstay orf NATO defence against the Russkies (and Comrade Ivan knows their capability). Very lethal. (Stop laughing Ivan)
Usual Kraut marketing, false performance figures coupled with brute force and bribery (Shurely not from the nation orf VW and BMW).
Not surprisingly there are rather a number of used Leopard II s aroinde for sale – not ex-battle field (scrap merchants only) but more ex-display models (Italian Forces ect ect). Indeed our Nato allies cannot get rid fast enough. Now hearing that the MOD is looking to replace our aging Challenger Tanks (a good tank despite faults, many orf which now ironed oit) the helpful Krauts have jack booted in and offered their own second hand rejects at a bargain price, £2 mill per pop. Response from the chinless cunts at the MOD? Fuck orf Krauty, not even if you chuck in an extra tank orf petrol? Not a bit orf it. Creaming their knickers at the prospect. Extra lubrication won’t make the bastards work better or safer though.
What the Krauts really want to do is get their mitts on the maintenance and spares contracts. Always lucrative in the military sphere particularly for a tank that gets blown up or stuck in a ditch whenever you use it. Bugger me though, Blighty has a tendency to use her tanks. A minor problem.
Clincher though is the role orf Brexit. Main Kraut bargaining chip. Pour your British pounds down our Euro sink hole and we well be minded to support you just an infinitesimally bit more in the negotiations. Sieg Heil! (Ja, das ist die neue Euro-Hymne)
Nominated by Sir Limply Stoke
Fucking emissions cheating closed shop running squareheaded German cunts trying to sell us more shite.
Never forgiven us for beating the cunts twice so now it’s an economic war and our useless government are more than happy to capitulate.
10
If we buy their crap tanks, how will we defend ourselves against the bastards when Operation Sea Lion (MK II) commences? Or is that all part of their cunning plan…?
9
On a technical comparison, I am not qualified to comment upon how a Challenger II would fare, but the Challenger UK is renowed for being a competent piece of kit, albeit an ageing one…
Which is more than I can say about the bunglers in the MOD. I work for a company who has to deal with the MOD’s DIO division and they are the most clueless, inept arseholes walking the earth.
Cunts all. Merkel must be rubbing her merkin at the thought of offloading a load of Hun steel and maintenance contracts at our expense. I thought the young Williamson had larger cojones?
9
Just read a bit about Challenger II. The one and only unit to be destroyed and two crew killed was when it was hit by ‘friendly fire’ from another Challenger II when the turret lid was open.
Why on fucking earth is the MOD considering these apparently inferior bullet-headed Joyman units?
7
The MOD are and have always been a bunch of money wasting cunts.
Should certainly be buying only British tanks.
12
They only buy British if they think it’ll cause a stink in the press, or there is a local vocal politician who will make some noise in the house of liars, apart from that anything overseas goes. Not that the snowflakes in this country would really care or even give a fuck where their armed forces equipment comes from.
For example,
MARRs Tankers, built in South Korea
New Apache choppers, USA
Maritime Patrol Aircraft, Boeing USA
RAF Surveillance Aircraft, Boeing USA
Lightning II Locheed MArtin USA
3
Oh for the days of Armstrongs on Scotswood Road in Newcastle. The whole of Scotswood in Newcastle used to build weapons such as the tank. Now a mere shadow of its former self, having been stiffed by the good old ” were all in it together” politicians. The prospect of not being able to arm ourselves is the most damning indictment of our fucked up times. Our air power gone, our navy mostly built with baco-foil, and our army now targetting the liberal mongoloids of the social media class.
An excellent cunting Sir Limply. Sad, but neccessary. Ivan has been the butt of many a joke over the last few decades. But I think the joke is entirely upon us.
Deutscheland Uber Alles! Wir sind alles zusammen nicht! EU Fukee Offski !
10
Surprised we can afford any hardware these days, what with all the money being pissed away on military LGBTQXYZ “inclusivity” projects!
If we’re buying 2nd hand can’t we buy some off our true allies – the yanks – rather than Mutty Merkel’s crepe paper cast offs?
They’ll probably do shit mileage but I bet they’re built like a tank…oh…which would be the point, I suppose.
7
All part of the emasculation of Blighty, which has been going on for years. Enemies without and enemies within. A Corbyn premiership will see the final capitulation.
11
Fucking he’ll had to cancel work today.Nearly skidded straight off the road 3 times in less than a mile.Main roads no better than the smaller ones down my way.
5
The wallop we took yesterday and last night I doubt the services could’ve done anything about it (road wise). Not even a character from Game of Thrones would go out in it!
What pisses me off is when we get a light flurry – when none of roads have been treated – and the whole cuntry comes to a pointless standstill!
4
Get rid of yer jalopy and buy a Leopard 2 tank Shaun…
4
It’s bad where I am too. Even with a 4×4 it was…challenging to drive. And still, I saw numerous fuckwits trying to drive on snowed up roads as if they were clear, I even had one twat behind me sound his horn, flash his lights and make hand gestures because I was doing twenty miles an hour on a snow covered road, in a 40 mph zone. The drooling crayon eater obviously didn’t consider the fact that it’s only a 40mph zone when the conditions allow, which today they did not. Humorously, Wally Windowlicker then tried to overtake, and promptly skidded off the road and onto a grass verge.
I’ve been driving for nearly 27 years now, and it never fails to amaze me how low standards have dropped in that time, especially when road conditions are bad. I was taught to drive in the Army, and as well as getting my HGV and motorbike licences, I was trained to drive in adverse weather conditions. Do they not do that in civvy street? I mean, what the fuck are today’s driving instructors teaching? I was taught that you drive to the conditions, meaning that if the conditions are bad, you slow down and take it easy. It should be common sense really, but we all know that the age of common sense has long since passed.
Ok, the amount of snow we had in my area last night made it incredibly difficult for the local council to ensure that all our roads were snow free and safe to drive on. That said, I couldn’t help noticing that they did make sure one particular road was clear. It’s the road on which a local Labour councillor lives. A Labour councillor whose late father just happened to have been the council’s “Leader for Life”. And didn’t he just revel in that.
Getting back on point, I think our current weather problems are the worst they’ve been for a while. Where I live, it’s certainly been a few years since we’ve had snow that stayed for more than a few hours, and there’s no sign of it melting any time soon. But that’s no excuse for people to forget that snow tends to be quite slippery, and driving like wankers.
5
Feel bad for turning back but am convinced I would have done a Marc Bolan if I hadn’t.
6
Feck orf ya ( young? ) weak cunts. The winter of 62/63 makes this shite positively tropical. Started snowing ( in the Midlands ) on Boxing Day and didn’t stop until the middle of March!!. No central heating, no coal, very few four wheel drives. People walking miles to get to work and back. Old army greatcoats on the bed, balaclavas, socks on kids hands for gloves. Schools closed. I was 9 years old and it was feckin’ great!
Mind you, I am now in SE Asia and it is 30 degrees today so you can all freeze ya balls off for all I care.
10
I was 6 and I remember it well. So cold it hurt to get into bed. Frost on the inside of the windows when you woke up. My school (in a suburb of Nottingham) never shut. Cunts…
2
Tanks are increasingly obsolete, far too vulnerable to Apache type helicopters.
5
And from the A10 Thunderbolt II, commonly referred to as “Warthog”. Possibly the only military aircraft to have been built a massive, fucking, 30mm cannon. And believe me, if you’re a tank, the hog will fuck you up.
7
Very well cunted, Sir Limply. With attention to detail to which it would be presumptuous to add anything more than my warmest thanks for highlighting the wretched state to which are fighting forces have been reduced by a bunch of arrogant and pig-thick civvies. Thank you.
10
*our* fighting forces. Fury makes cunts of us all.
4
Back to brexit. Not sure if this has been mentioned just heard it on the radio. It’s soooooo obvious I feel a bit thick for not realising it before. The Eurocrats are making brexit as hard and as complicated as fuckin possible so as to discourage any other country from trying the same thing, it’s also having the affect of making those here who voted brexit consider whether or not they did the right thing.
5
You are being heavily ironical, aren’t you Richard? Either that or dementia has finally caught up with me…
5
Not sure what to make of it either Shitcake.
First class honours in stating the bleeding obvious..
4
All the EU have done with their insidious campaign is to make me realise
A … I voted leave correctly
B… I wished I had been offered the opportunity earlier
Also juncker,s 5 point plan isn’t something I would ever be interested in, ditching the pound? Allowing poorer countries that don’t meet the EU,s financial compliance to join? The EU is looking more and more like a Ponzi scheme!
If you haven’t got the cash they are happy to take slave labour as payment………
12
Anyone with any brains can see we are better off out of the EU.
Unelected corrupt lying fuckers screwing with countries.
7
Excellent cunting SLS
Nobody should be surprised by this post the MOD have been fuckin selling our forces short for years, talk to anyone who has served and you will hear a tail of woe…
it’s utterly shameless!!! Cunts
8
At the risk of stating the bleeding obvious, the answer to the underfunding of our armed forces is very simple – just do away with the ridiculous .7% minimum compulsory aid funding and use it to fund defence instead…
11
Too many snowflakes in opposition to cutting the aid budget, Dio.
Far, far too many snowflakes.
7
You’ve only got to look out your window!
7
I’m genuinely interested here, Dio. When you say “fund defence” who are you defending us from? Do you mean that the military should take an active role in policing our borders? The greatest threat to this country no longer seems to come from a military power,more from an internal will to surrender the country without a fight.
I suppose I mean,in my confused way,that we could have the biggest and best army in the world,but if our “leaders” sell us out anyhow,what’s the point?
11
Although your absolutely right dio there’s no chance, can you imagine the bleeding heart brigade?
Sending money to coco joe in coco mo is far more important than funding and protecting our armed forces properly……… 😡
13
But defence is racist Dio!
Unless its against ordinary UK folk who are pissed off with the shithole we’re becoming.
Yes those people are nasty “right wing” anti EU gravy-train types who need to be bound over and controlled by government forces (unlike our borders for example).
8
Would probably do a sight more practical good. Applause.
2
Does anyone think that we even have the need for tanks,be they German or otherwise,any more? I’m genuinely interested to know if Cunters believe that we are capable of taking an active part in a conventional war,and if we are,who do they believe that we will be fighting?
I can’t see why any country would bother to invade us. What the fuck have we got that anyone would want? Besides,there’s no need to invade when we have already sat back and let the Country be overrun with hardly a shot being fired. A few bombs and a couple of mentally-ill drivers seems to have reduced the national psyche to a state of “Run,hide and tell”.
I have every respect for the Armed Forces but fear that they are becoming increasingly irrelevant. Their legacy has been sacrificed on the alter of political correctness fronting for darker forces. A tank on every driveway would not turn the tide these days.
Cheerful cunt,aren’t I?
13
The Generals have all been ‘re-educated’ and their bollocks removed. Officer class in danger of parodying Black Adder Goes Forth…
10
Oh, I don’t blame the Generals, S.B. I blame a nation which has stood by and allowed successive governments to sell-out not just the military,but the whole country.
11
I suspect that if anyone seriously wanted to invade this country, and we were unable to get support from neighbouring countries it would be over within the hour.
The last 20 years of government have completely ruined this country for ever more.
7
Who the fuck would want to invade us, Willie? Unless they had a national need for peacefuls,snowflakes and degenerates they’d be out of luck. We haven’t got much else.
5
Who would want to invade us? The same cunts who are currently invading us, except on a larger, more root & branch scale. It would be like Black Friday on steroids!
8
@S.B….they have no need for a larger invasion,they’re doing quite nicely without having to upgrade.
8
Fuck me Dick… it was only a month or so ago you became a born again poofter, which was an event hard enough to swallow, but now you’re coming out as a born again pacifist?!
Jeez. That snowflake potion /formula the Russians have been pumping into the reservoirs must be more potent than I imagined…
7
@SB…. Pacifist? Hardly,more of a realist.
5
Realist you indeed are Dick. Pacifist clearly not. Suppose I was really musing on the pointlessness of us retaining any sort of defence force at all if no one would want to invade us – it certainly makes a complete mockery of us maintaining a nuclear deterrent (assuming it’s functional, or even exists) – think of all the cash that could be freed up to piss down some other shitter, like an early start on a replacement for HS2.
After all, the army is only recruiting peacefuls and homosexualists these days, all of whom would be far better employed re-educating white middle aged men, sadly left behind in the rush to modernity.
Btw, has Kravdarth taught you any interesting new techniques in your quest to embrace the ways of poofery?
5
@SB…Krav has ignored my overtures. I can’t understand why. Perhaps it was some inadvertent slight slip of the tongue,although I must say,nothing springs to mind.
5
At least you tried Dick.
Reckon that Kravdarth is all talk… faced with the prospect of a real man he predictably ran to his safe space.
4
Aircraft carriers without fighter jets for years, Marines threatened with cunts…it will soon be reduced to some drone pilots sat somewhere in Lincolnshire bombing towelheads out of their holes.
5
Agree, Generals just following orders, mirroring the new social order – people get the Government they deserve – everything down the Swanee, I’m off for a nice dump.
8
Too much information Shitcake.
4
Yes but in the battle of the lip gloss we’re streets ahead!
5
Any “war effort” very likely to be “By the left, quick mince !”
“Ooooh, look at you, Sarge !”
2
Don’t know any technicalities here but it has been well known for many years that MoD procurement is incompetent in the extreme.
8
Nationalisation in action! A timely reminder…
6
MOD procurement appear to use the services of Arthur Daley and boycie ……
7
No because they’d at least get a good deal – even if the product is shite!
The MoD excel at getting shite at the highest possible price!
7
Ah common on RWAC
6 billion for an aircraft carrier is a fuckin steal !!
Even better when we eventually get to stick some jets on it in 3-4 years!
Can you imagine those useless Cunts building a battleship?
Ships built guns delivered in 2025!
I particularly like our Type 45 destroyers , apparently they can only sail in a gentle south westerly…. 😂😂
9
Not much has change since the 17th century. Samuel Peyps was dealing with the same sort of cunts then when trying to defend good old England. Must be inbreeding still showing its ugly head century’s later. General Melchett’s genetic lineage must still be prevalent in those MOD cunts today.
10
Leopard 2’s have wafer thin side armour, even the later versions. Front armour is good as they were designed to halt a head on attack by soviet tanks in the Cold War. They are also not good at working without infantry support to clear their flanks. Plus I suspect Jonny Turk hasn’t got a fucking clue what they are doing either.
Having served in Challenger 2’s – and sat in one outside Basra being hit by so many rpgs it sounded like a hailstone storm and remaining fully mobile / operational there ain’t no other tank I would serve in anywhere else in the world.
Mutti Merkel should be told to fuck right off trying to peddle virtually obsolete shite to us.
Of course the desk flying pen pushing twats in the MOD will only look at the cost benefit analysis on this one, not the cost of our forces lives in the next conflict if we end up with these pieces of shite.
Wankers
13
The MOD procurement is overblown for sure. I work for a company that rebuilds Piston Aero Engines. We do the RNHF Swordfish engines they are 1930’s Bristol Pegasus beautifully made bits of kit apart from the 2ba nuts and bolts on the exhaust manifold. 4 valves per head, twin plug supercharged.
But to do any work on it you have to deal with the combined departments of the Navy, and the MOD some cunts called CAMO its like pulling teeth.
The aeroplane flew in the north Atlantic off an aircraft carrier pitching around in the freezing and attacked the fucking Bismark and our modern snowflake cunts worry about the most minute details like why is the paint not the same colour or they aren’t the same spark plugs. They components fitted are all Aerospace approved fitted to vintage and modern engines alike but not conforming to their idiotic standard is more important. MOD fucking our country slowly but surely.
9
You have my deepest sympathy goodwoodone.
It’s only a matter of time before the RNHF is consigned to static display only and all vintage warbirds prevented from flying. The Hawker Hunter crash at Shoreham a few years back was the start of this particular slippery slope.
The amount of paperwork and clearances required now to fly an in-service/production aircraft is almost beyond a joke I dread to think what it must be like for a vintage model of 60/70yrs age…
Seems to me also that 2/3rds of the jobs in depts. such as CAMO or the MAA are just there for the ‘old boys network’. It’s no wonder MoD have got no money when they have to fund this myriad of desk bound fuckers wages.
3
If you’re good at reversing an ITALIAN tank would do you nicely !!!!!!
8
Italian tanks.. eleven reverse gears and one forward gear just in case they are attacked from behind.
6
….and a rear view mirror to watch the battle….
8
And check their hair every 2mins…
Captain Corellis Mandolin was a documentary….
Nicholas Cage, now there’s a cunt.
5
The guns only point backward, like on their warships.
4
Run Away ,Run Away !!!!!!!!
6
Is that your Jimmy Somerville impersonation Cumnock?
6
Would you cunters ever use rape in a self defense situation? https://i.imgur.com/QJ4LOrC.jpg Like this hunky poof
5
Ha ha ha.
Karma.
I almost feel sorry for them.
3
Fucks Sake.. I’d charge the robbers with burglary and the Gay with turd-burglary. They really should have some kind of sign in their window to let people know that they run the risk of forcible entry.
8
I do hope it’s true, but I think it’s fake…
1
If the mod want German tanks they should go take them the old fashioned way.
Why do they want tanks anyway?
We need candles, acoustic guitars, flowers, “not all muslims” banners, a crackdown on “right wing” cunts on social media, thoughts, prayers and some “elite” twats to come on the telly and call the British public cunts.
That’s how you fight a war these days.
11
Too fucking much DTS – I nearly fell out of my Bath chair!
5
I almost forgot the run, hide, tell pamphlets.
…..wouldn’t want to go to war without those.
7
Reminds me of the final Blackadder scene.
Edmund: Don’t forget your stick, Lieutenant.
George: Oh no, sir — wouldn’t want to face a machine gun without this!
6
As for the four-minute warning, Al_Beeb will emit a high-pitched squeal recorded by Linekunt.
4
Someone give big bad Vlad a call. He’ll be more than happy to flog us a few leftover T-34s….
4
Snow day today so I’m watching Emily Cuntberry in the commons on sly news.
What a fucking horrible cunt she is.
A right old bruiser.
Man I hope these cunts don’t win the next election.
8
Daily Politics even more painful… Barry Gardiner attempting to defend the indefensible – Munroe Bergdorf’s appointment as advisor to Dawn Butler!
If nothing else it’ll put off another shed load of traditional Labour voters, Bergdorf being a sort of mega Eddie Izzard scumbag on stilts.
6
Be nice, but
I’ll wager an LGBTXYV123 butch hairless half dog half ape crossed with a dead pig and the spawn of Elon John would get voted in parts of the North East or South Wales if it wo a red Labour rosette.
2
Staggering to think that considering what a complete fucking bunch of shambolic useless misfits ET and her opposition twats are they are still in a position to influence the Brexit outcome.
Shows just how fucking weak and useless the current Tory party is, and together with Labour just how much they are letting down the 52% of the electorate who voted to leave the EU.
Spineless unpatriotic undemocratic cunts.
6
That’s what happens when 80%+ of Parliament (both houses) would rather rape their grandmothers than actually leave their blessed EU.
It’s unfolding as we said all along: B.R.I.N.O.
Brexit In Name Only.
And all this Irish border shit is nonsense. After all, if two friendly democracies like USA & Canada can administer a far longer friction free border, why can’t the EU & the UK? Because the EU don’t want to, and our Remain Government and opposition are playing along – it’s all a fucking sham, they don’t want Brexit and that’s that.
7
Now John major is going to get up and enlighten and educate us all on brexit shortly.
I’ve heard as much as I ever want to hear from this cunt but i guess I’ll hang around out of curiosity.
I feel an imminent piss boiling is on the cards though.
I’ll just make sure there arent any heavy objects around. I don’t want my tv to get damaged.
6
Thanks for the heads up Sausage. I am going out.
I may be some time…
6
How the fuck can someone who has shagged Edwina Currie, question somebody else’s decision making….
7
Heard him. Piss now explosively ebullient. What an absolute five-Michelin-star, cytotoxic, mealy-mouthed, selfserving cunt.
However, JR-M had a word or two to say on the same lines – he thought Major might at least deliver a statesmanlike speech, having been PM (has JR-M ever heard Blair? – that would have confounded his expectations), based on something other than unsubstantiated scare-stories….but…
And thrice but.
3
I used to work for a company that supplied the MOD and the private sector. Average gross margin for private sector a respectful 54%. For the MOD. 88%. I was in accounts, not sales so had no idea how that came about. We had one product that was 98%!
Can’t see any reason for us to buy tanks. Who needs tanks when we have drones?
5
I think drones and tanks would be useful right now, I can think of parts of Rotheram and Luton to start with, then 10 Downing Street if the fekkers don’t deliver the majority wish on BREXIT.
5
As for the four-minute warning, Al_Beeb will emit a high-pitched squeal recorded by Linekunt.
2
Have no idea what the fuck you’re on about regarding the challenger, the challenger 2 is state of the art and it’s British. It has classified stealth coated armour that no other nation has. Don’t even think the yank cunts have access to it.
3
Sir John was a bus conductor in his younger days……could have
ended up as a ‘Blakey’ type inspector.
What an idiot.
2
His father was a trapeze artist, music-hall entertainer, and purveyor of garden gnomes!
No wonder the cunt turned out to be a snake oil salesman.
2
Gentelmen you are missing one tiny little detail……..
These are export models, they do not have the same armour packs!
I know it sounds bizare but the ABRAHAM’S, Leopards and the Challengers that were exported have different armour packs in them.
However we do not sell “down powered” tow misiles.
You may wonder how I know this, but my own expeariance (Gulf war 1, my whole regiments chariots were sold to the rag heads (bar 3 one in bovy museaum then my bosses one parked accross the road and one in private ownership) but they had their armour packs changed and the chalinger 2 has a more advanced pack coupled with reactive armour.
1