A cunting please for the Home Office.
We can “invest” over £14 billion each year to unworthy causes, and we can donate £45 million to the pension pot of the French President. Well hell, we can even find £200 billion to shave 10 minutes off a train time with HS2.
What we cannot do, is provide for the security and the protection of the British Public. And the reason? No cash allocated in this years budget ( we are skint )
The Home Office therefore, are actively supporting both Durham and Cheshire Constabulary to deploy unpaid volunteer ” CommunityTerror Detectives ” and Durham ( wait for it ) Child Police Officers!!!!!
It has also come to light, that an all inclusive force is to be formed , and that previous criminal convictions will not automatically bar an individual from service.!!!!!!!!!
Both sets of Noddy’s will be attached and trained by the relevant Constabularies, and if successful, will be rolled out all over the country. Child Police will be encouraged to spy on traffic offenders, and social disorders. Whilst the freshly released from prison can go case the local eastates for “Terrorists”
The scheme obviously has the blessing and the support of our one and only ever friend Amber the Gambler.
I can see many safe guarding issues arising, and some fucking amazing comparisons to the “Hitler Youth” of yesteryear.
All of this, at a time when the Politicians couldn’t be thicker than the shit in my pants following Ahmeds Camel Curry.
I understand from former colleagues that the “little Police” ( of Durham ) are already being recruited , and circulars are already being printed to be pasted no doubt within the prisons.
Gentleman, I give you the Home Office. A symptom of a very fucked country.
Nominated by Asimplearsehole.
Off topic cunters. I noticed there was a bit of furore the other day when someone mentioned a person and said some unproven things. When asked for proof they said fuck all, and originally wanted us to discuss it. It got me thinking whether there might be people trying to get us all to say things to get this site shut down. My thoughts only and I don’t want to stir it up again but let’s be careful what we start discussing and saying. Oh by the way I know naffink abaaaaaht it.
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B&W C
Do you remember who the provocateur was? (pardon my French)
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@Cuntstable Cuntbubble, I know who it was and I’m not gonna name the person. For me this website is about cunting the many cunts of all colours, races, religion’s etc and not about saying unproven things about a dead person without proof and asking us to discuss it. It seemed to me to be a bit of bait.
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The provocateur in question was a well respected cunter of long standing repute. Yesterday he inexplicably overstepped the line…and it wasn’t Dick.
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Totally agree BAWC…
I’m pretty sure 99% on here are genuine but there may be some people with a very different agenda….
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Exactly Quislings, as yourself I’ve been on here a good while and seen many cunters come and go, we have got to be careful what we get drawn into whatever the motive of the person who starts it.
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my agenda is clear, women, girly boys, alchol, a slight splash of fashisum all dressed in rubber.
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100% correct BAWC
ISAC is fuckiin ace!!
Always gives me a laugh and also some educational posts, I would hate to lose that, as I’m sure all genuine posters would……
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I’m fairly new here but one of the things I really like is that I feel like I’m among like minded cunts and that there are no sacred cows.
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Quality cunting. I agree with every word of that. This cuntry is going to cunt in a cuntbasket.
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Top Cunting.
I cannot understand how these politicians whose number one job should be to protect the people turn round and say ‘Sorry we can’t afford the and that’ yet we can afford to send billions in foreign aid. It’s a total pisstake and it’s more importantly discusting. After Christmas all the old cunts got ill and wee waiting in hospital hallways etc due to lack of beds. Surely we could tell India who have their own space program to fuck off for a few years whilst we sort out the shit hole that is now the UK.
Nah that’d be to easy and straightforward wouldn’t it.
The cunts.
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Exactly B&W, couldn’t agree more. Charity begins at home, and while we have our own homeless, and our own people can’t get into hospitals for treatment, to send money abroad is a fucking disgrace.
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Had to happen. Look at the ‘new’ army. Then self identifying gender freaks. Surely some fucker will call a halt to this shit?
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Well observed, although I would have thought that the contents of pants after the aforementioned Camel Curry would be more vapour-like and even ephemeral, not within a million miles of the thickness displayed by our erstwhile ‘leaders’.
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Wouldn’t it be a stroke of luck if they could persuade an ex-con well versed in terror attacks to taxi a gang of snooping brats in a government funded vehicle? Just think…Mo Le Taxi might get his quota of virgins popped before he launches his Home Office provided taxi at the nearest bunch of unbelievers.
When this scheme is the undoubted success that it deserves to be,perhaps they’ll get round to asking me to be a Community Liaison Officer. I have some groundbreaking ideas on how to resolve several of the problems faced by those who feel alienated in this “Evolving for the better” country.
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Great, next time some old Dorris is getting mugged for her pension or a bunch of scally’s are terrorising local shops the people of Durham can be safe in the knowledge that the Teletubbies, Big Bird and the rest of the Sesame Street gang are on the way.
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A few years ago I’d arranged to meet a customer to look at a job. I couldn’t find his house so after driving slowly around for a while I parked up and phoned him to come and meet me. I got the paper and flask out while I waited for him. Unfortunately I’d parked opposite a school entrance and it wasn’t too long before 2 teachers came banging on my window asking what I was doing. The windows had steamed up from the flask and my paper was apparently hiding my “fiddling” as I watched the kids.
How I giggled at the misunderstanding of being accused of Fuck Knows what. In fact I was giggling that hard that I fucking nearly decked the old bag who was leading the assault on my innocent self. Foul minded old bitch..
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Mo le Taxi! Fucking nice one, I nearly spat my coffee out laughing!
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My other half works at an education establishment. When a vehicle is seen hanging around a school and its reported, all other schools in the area are contacted and advised to be vigilant for that type & colour of vehicle.
There are some sick fuckers out their trying to get kids in cars / vans at schools and maybe a similar vehicle was on the alert list in your area.
I wouldn’t be too offended as she’s only doing what’s advised, albeit her approach skills may need some polishing. Its not something they thankfully get a lot of practice at doing, at least not in my area. They nip incidents in the bud and flush them out quickly.
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I suppose it’s logical progression, after all, the government is full of Muppets and that’s working well..,.oh wait, hang on…
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What aload of old bollocks. What the fuck is a child copper going to do? No money for cops, armed forces, public sector ect. Yet we give African cunts millions to buy new weapons.
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Maybe they are stealing a labour party idea and using the Flabbot scale of police wages.
£8 a week pocket money was it?
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Welcome back Basement.
Hope 2018 has got off to a good start for you and your family.
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Cheers Willie, Been quite rough at the turn of the year but on a more even keel over the last few days. Just got bogged under with too much on top of existing problems. Hoping to address a few big problems off the list this week and lighten the load. Getting through on the phone to cunts aka DWP & HMRC is easier said than done. If I fail then I’m going to my MP.
Getting what I’m owed in arrears from DWP would mend some rifts in my relationship & allow me to pay something to the HMRC. After six months unpaid, I have bigger people waiting on their money first.
HMRC screwed up three years ago & its come to light at a bad time. They don’t listen well though and I don’t have a “May Money tree” out my back garden to shake.
Sadly, Its going to be sometime before I am physically fit for work but I’m hoping to be back in some capacity in 5/6 months, in full hopefully 9 or 10.
I intend to leave the year better than I entered it, that’s for sure and I wish a good year ahead to everyone else here.
The spirit of cunters, yourself and others will keep me sane while I’m detained in this shitty system.
My situation has been long but thankfully wont be permanent, however its opened my eyes to what really goes on and I really feel for the many trapped in the system for life with no light at the end of the tunnel.
Those fighting every day, treated like shit while we pile out foreign aid and money aiding the foreign who land on our shores. Its like they’re rubbing salt in your GB wounds with a cheap foreign chainsaw!
Heartfelt thanks from the basement, Bob.
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Thanks for the update Basement.
Good luck, keep strong and dont let the bastards grind you down.
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Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right,
Here I am, stuck in the middle with you
Stealers Wheel, 1972
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FLASH………. Over to our newsdesk for some upsetting news…. A construction worker traveling on the New York subway has stuck one on James Corden (snigger) bursting his nose (chuckle). The fat cunt was singing with Uber Cunt Sting and cunt of colour Shaggy for some fucking TV shit.Apparently they had been told by various fellow travelers to shut the fuck up when the construction worker decided to take direct action (give that man a prize). After the altercation the three soft cunts sat down and behaved themselves. Fatty Corden dabbing his hooter. I’ve not stopped laughing for the last quarter hour, oh my fucking sides !!
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Did they get it on camera? Please, someone tell me it’s on youtube somewhere…
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I’ve just discovered it’s a set up. What a cunt. I feel cheated.
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Bugger.
Would love to have watched that. Endlessly…
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https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/5447421/james-corden-punched-in-the-face-during-hilarious-carpool-karaoke-skit-with-sting-and-shaggy/amp/
Clearly a set up. Unfortunately.
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Only slightly off topic…..May be I may have missed this being cunted as I’ve been pretty busy this last few days but how is it that Catweazle makes a statement to the effect in his first days in office he’s going to ‘buy’ 8000 Properties for the homeless and he’s not been laughed out of town?
My initial thought was ‘Jesus what a cunt but I’ll be kicking the kids out then at least they’ll be sorted’ but then on closer inspection it appears he’s going to ‘take control’ of many of the empty properties in London and across the country.
Catweazle is on record stating ‘most’ second Properties belong to ‘the rich’ and are only used as investments.
What a pile of cunt. Thousands of properties nationwide lay vacant for a myriad of reasons, probate is fairly typical as is elderly folks moving into nursing accommodation and who haven’t yet had to sell up.
But hang on a minute what if that’s your property, either left in a will or you want to sell it but it’s not on the market as the selling conditions aren’t favourable.
Tough.
Captain Cunt is going to force you to sell it so he can home any homeless Tom, Dick or Abdul. This house may have belonged to your parents, indeed you may well have grown up in it and it may have been the only asset your parents left but that’s irrelevant because your freedom of choice, a fucking basic core principal of democracy is not just being threatened, no, Catweazle has put everyone on notice, the Commie’s are coming.
Fuck me, he’s a genuine Despot, I don’t believe he’s yet stated how much of our money he’s prepared to pay in order to force us to sell our Properties in order he can give them away to some homeless cunt but I’ll bet my mortgage it will start way below the market rate if we’re lucky.
Why do I think this, well that fucking dangerous commie bastard McDonnell has already said he won’t necessarily pay market rate to buy back the Utility Companies, not that that would have any effect on investor confidence in the UK or anything, so you can rest assured there’s fuck all chance little old you will get a fair deal.
I’m absolutely fucking outraged at this intention but I’m fucking beside myself that he’s not being slaughtered over it. I know the Al-BBC is Corbyn friendly but surely a lot of the cunts that staff it could easily fall victim to such a policy, being middle class children of well off or asset rich ageing parents.
Maybe it’s a case of The Emporer’s New Clothes?
Regardless, this cunt has clearly stated he intends to use the power of the state to subjugate it’s citizens and you can bet your bottom dollar the suppression of political opposition will follow because it always does…..
I’m genuinely fucking stunned by the silence and lack of scrutiny of this cunt, the last time these policies were being practiced in any European country they preceded WWII.
In other more important news, Donald Trump represents a clear and present danger to women’s reproductive rights, Donald Trumps Dad once refused to rent to a Black person and Owen Jones is demanding some shit or other for some minor minority…..
Jesus fucking Christ, help us….
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One nation under a cunt, what could possibly go wrong ?
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Maybe he did the maths using his Flabottulator…
8000 x houses = £12001.80
Clearly the Flabottulator also tells him this is a win win situation as the council tax received on the empty properties first year of habitation will cover this and leave enough to buy the railways back.
Good job Jez has people he can count on should he get into number 10, hardest part of the job for his cabinet will be sitting in the commons for PM questions, the rest of the weeks a breeze after that isn’t it?
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Good show moderators. Marvelous service.
Chin chin.
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For the first time in I don’t know how long, I surfaced and made it downstairs to a pile of bills which got thrown on the pile.
I charged up my phone for an update on the world via ISAC and see this cunting.
Surely a hoax I say…ISAC has been infiltrated by pranksters…I rush off and google Durham police and up pops reality…
https://www.sunderlandecho.com/our-region/county-durham/police-recruiting-volunteers-to-help-at-incidents-patrol-streets-and-solve-basic-crimes-1-8986585/amp
Solve basic crimes?
Ticking the box on correct uniform sizes would have been a start, but maybe baggy trousers will mean big baggy trouser pockets to hide the doughnuts in…look left. 😀
God knows why they’re smiling?
When Fatboy gets tripped up and knocked out, leaving her at the mercy of a bunch of horny young peaceful religion worshipers, it won’t be a laughing matter. Nor will it be when the incident gets thrown in the bin.
The streets need patrolled by people trained and capable of enforcing law and order. This just makes a mockery of the system.
Give the trainee thugs some trainee cops to serve their time on before moving up to the real ones. Surprised they couldn’t get a peaceful recruit in time for the photoshoot?
Amber the Gambler?… More like Rudd the Dud.
Mind you the hunchback did no better in her time, failing to deliver everything on the manifesto.
Looks like I have missed some great cunting the past few weeks which I will have to catch up on.
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Look at that fat cunt in the picture! He’s gonna deal with a crew of pissed up chavs at closing time, is he? Do me a favour. He looks so fat and jolly, I actually want him to take a serious panelling on his first shift.
Sam Tarly looking cunt.
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He is guarding his box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts closely in that left trouser pocket…probably the only way you will get any angry show of strength is if you try taking them off him.
Otherwise, he will let you beat him to a pulp as long as you leave his left arm and mouth in working order so that he can eat his “stakeout snack” as he lies gasping for air.
I bet Durhams crime lords are quivering in their dens with fear following this announcement.
No fear folks, they will be standing with speed guns targeting the working man running late for work or people dropping a cigarette butt on the ground. Crime solving indeed, generating some cash along the way.
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Winter is definitely coming for that cunt.
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I don’t know what your issues are with this, I mean replacing proper Coppers with the “Dad’s Army” Community Police has been a resounding success hasn’t it!
“So you can nick fellons like a copper then?”
“Er, well no, but we can call the police to come and arrest them.”
“Ah, I see but you can detain them until the police arrive though right?”
“Er, well no, but we can take their details and inform the police.”
“And how do you know that they’re telling the truth, if anything at all?”
“Er…well…look, we wear hats, have stab vests and radios so we look good ok! And so that should make you feel safe on the street, right!”
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And can you imagine the snivelling shites they’ll attract to grass on the general public, FFS?
“Look, look! It’s old Wilson in his raspberry mobile. He always parks there gets on his buggy and fuck’s off into the paper shop for his smokes and paper!”
“So?”
“So, it’s double yellows and if we time it right we can get a picture of him banged to rights!”
“But he’s only in 1 minute??”
“Yeah I know but the coppers don’t. Besides the old cunt didn’t fork out on Halloween and if we show the cunt the picture first we’ll say ‘Call it a fiver’ to forget we ever seen him.”
“Oh yeah!”
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To say that none of this has been thought through wearing the “nasty cunt dark glasses” instead of Queen Bee May’s “rose tinted” ones is an understatement.
Combine little bastards with an axe to grind, camera phones, (anti)social media and we’ll end up in a police state somewhere between 1984 and Invasion of the Body Snatchers!
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Also “community terror detectives”…so in recent times 100% of the acts have been done by “peaceful” cunts. O’course it wouldn’t be PC to ban the likes of your Mohameds, Ahmeds, Abus, etc., would it.
And so we basically have a volunteer community terror detective group made up of “peacefuls” policing/monitoring “peacefuls”.
O’course they’ll have to get the skinny on who they’re monitoring/watching from proper plod and – cynic as I am – wouldn’t it be really easy to tip off the terrorist via the mosque grapevine!
I mean are they for fucking real!?!
Talk about the fox getting into the chicken run! We’re inviting the fox in and are blithely assuming that it won’t slaughter the chickens!
Fucking madness! Absolute fucking madness!!! 😠
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You got their plan spot on there!
Its about time people went vigilante without the home office blessing. Justice and laws of the people of the streets. Save the courts some time and money dealing with these scum, it surely can’t be a bad thing.
The EU transition looks like its going out the window…
We pay 40 odd millon, we abide by EU law, we allow as many of them to come and seek residence here, we are not allowed to start arranging trade deals with other countries and we pay in full membership money but have no say / vote in any decisions either?
How can anyone not walk immediately from this?
EU trying to bluff the British once again like when they sent Scameron home from Brussels with nothing to persuade us to vote remain in the referendum.
This is just another round of time wasting, slowing us down and trying to prevent Britain getting back on its feet free of them cunts.
They are trying to delay us making trade deals as they know America under Trump will look after us and this delay might take us past Trumps administration where the next president might be an Obama EU ass kissing type who will leave us out in the cold.
Typical EU cunts, treated us like shit when we were members and still treating us like shit as we leave, yet cunts like Macron give the “GB doesn’t have to leave” spiel.
They are fooling no cunt other than LBC presenters & their remoaner chums.
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The Police force was going down the pan once Sir George Young questioned the minimum height requirements in 1976. since 1919 minimum heights were 5ft 8″ and 5ft 4″ respectively but this twat asked “What then are the duties of a policeman, which makes it so essential that he should be above 5 ft. 8 in.? I am bound to say that the police have been helping me in my inquiries. I quote from their own literature: People are his business and in the course of that business he has to play many rôles. He is part detective. Part psychologist. Part organiser. Part public relations officer”. I ask the hon. Lady, to which of those jobs is height a prerequisite? The leaflet goes on to show some typical incidents in the day of a policeman—searching derelict houses for missing children, rescuing a family from a flooded house, escorting an ambulance by motorbike to hospital, climbing up a television mast to talk a man out of a suicide jump. Height is totally irrelevant to this typical range of functions shown in the brochure put out by the police themselves”
And there you have it we are doomed by midgets, fat cunts, and general dross recruited more to fill numbers than get real useful coppers.
Any cunters that are ex or serving police have my respect especially having to deal with all the modern PC crap.
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