I deal with these twats daily at work. They show an industrial grade calibre of fuckwittery. Nice enough people, but so insular that I’m astounded they even realise they know the world outside the good ‘ol US of A even exists.
Just a few years ago we were in Spain at a market. Some dick head ‘merican was trying to convince the stall holder to accept dollars. An isolated incident, so I thought. Not so.
Just got back from Venice where a local ciggie shop has a queue out the fucking door due to some gob shite yank trying to pay in $100 dollar bills. The shop keep was most accommodating and offered the git a good Euro/dollar exchange rate so he could buy some tabs. All this cunt did was whinge about the rate he got. FUCK RIGHT OFF AND BRING FUCKING EUROS NEXT TIME!. That’s what I thought and was exactly what the shop keeper said.
Fucking Yanks. There is a world outside the inbread, racist shit hole you inhabit.
Nominated by: Essemess
The cuntiest thing they do is go on about ‘freedom’.
Oh for fuck sake, you’re not the only free country in the world, out of the free countries you have 1% of your population in prison, twice as much as the next country which is South Africa. South fucking Africa, land of the free my fucking arse. In Holland you can smoke weed while fucking a hooker in front of a cop. How dare Holland not be called the land of the free.
Cunts.
0
‘Murricuh is only the “land of the free” if you can afford a good lawyer…
1
There are ciggie shops in Venice? Where?
Last time I was there on business, there was nothing but souvenir tat shops and Kodak film shops.
Not a ciggie merchant in sight and I was clucking all the way back to blighty as I only brought twenty B&H with me.
0
No coincidence that Yank rhymes with both plank and wank…
0
…. and of course … ‘septic tank’ …. is the ‘rhyming slang’ for them round our way.
0
Like you say, nice enough people but thick as fuck and know fuck all about anything outside America. In fact most don’t know so much about inside America. It’s not that difficult to find ones who have never left the county, never mind the state. If they didn’t drop bombs on other countries they would have no idea the outside world existed.
I used to work a lot with Yanks. One time there was this Yank cunt, senior management, must have been drawing $300k minimum. He’d just come back from Disneyland and delighted in telling anyone that would listen too how you could pay an extra $10 and get a special cup with a microchip in it which allowed you to get unlimited fizzy drinks at any of the food outlets in the park. Like that was absolutely the highlight of his trip.
1
Sturgeon’s off again and warrants another nomination. The Scottish Government (aka SNP) has today published a paper predicting Scottish GDP to be between £1.7bn and £11.2bn per year lower by 2030 as a result of Brexit. It is based on a whole load of studies carried out by the Project Fear brigade before the referendum that only a cunt would still believe in.
Here’s an idea to boost GDP, Crankie – how about stop whining and go and get some trade deals? How about make Scotland more attractive to inward investment by resigning? How about reversing the decline in Scotland’s educational system since the SNP got into power? How about reducing public sector jobs in favour of private sector jobs? And how about accepting that we voted as the UK and the result, therefore, applies equally to all parts of the UK?
Hard to let go of the teat though, eh?
0
£1.7 bn to £11.2 bn? Not much margin for error there, then.
Scotland’s only asset was North Sea oil. Most of the North Sea oil plays are marginal fields, not worth the big boys time and effort so the majority of NS producers now are small mop up operations running on tight overheads. Due to the low oil price ( Thank you Saudi Arabia ) many of these marginal fields are being wound down and will likely never produce again. It is not as simple as turning a tap off and then back on again. Once a field has stopped producing it takes a substantial investment to bring it back online. That investment will be difficult to find, even if the oil price increases. Hence Sotland’s only asset is essentially fucked. Even if the oil price improves they will never see production levels rise to what they were only a few years ago. This in course has knock on effects throughout the entire economy and will see Scotland take up it’s rightful position in the world alongside The Central African Republic and Haiti.
Where’s your “Scandinavian levels of provision” now you smarmy lard arsed cunt, Salmond?
0
Let’s get fracking! That’ll fuck the jocks up…
0
Fracking doesn’t make sense without huge government subsidies and even then it only works if done on a huge scale which isn’t really possible in UK. I’m no tree hugger but I’m against fracking in UK.
0
There’s always the shortbread.
0
……. and the Harris Tweed …
0
kick the jocks out of the UK and we’ll see how their GDP drops then
0
we had a guy from Ohio working abroad with us once, nice guy but as I soon found out gulable as fuck, He was moaning about the fact we had to wait for most things, no “instant service” and how we didnt grumble about queueing, I explained to him that we were used to it because of the bread queues in the uk, He asked me about them and I explained how the UK was still paying off lend lease to uncle sam and that certain items were still rationed including bread.
It was food for thought for him, slightly humbling in fact, he allso belived it much to our amusment so yes they are very insular, but incredibly gullable too.
0
The yanks are annoying cunts,but they have some good points such as allowing guns
Remember the riots for the duggan cunt ? That would have been shut down real fast in america
In america you can only get benefits for 6 months, they should do ssomething similar here, tell the somali,roma gypsy fuckers to get a job
Also you’d be surprised how many yanks are proper right wingers, don’t believe the cnn,bbc bullshit about how everyone loves obongo
0
I recall an episode of that Jock Cunt Billy Connolly doing tour of the US , interviewing a chap in Oklahoma or some real US state for his Route 66 programme.
The bloke was less than enamoured with the fuck face obama and wee Billy had a right epi over it.
I’m off the the “Flyover” states next year. Looking forward to meeting some real Americans.
Not some metrosexual, simpering poofs from Noo York or La-la land
0
I always hated Connoly, his comedy consisted of telling a long rambling story ,and alot of unnecessary swearing in the thickest scots accent
Another fried mars bar shortbread cunt just like frankie Boyle
0
I always avoided those Connoly travelogue programs. He did one on Australia too. I don’t like that Michael Palin doing the same. Basically it is like looking at somebodies holiday photos, who the fuck is interested and why should we have to pay for them to go on holiday?
0
I’d like to nominate Twitter users.
A bunch of whiny perma-offended cunts.
0
Yep. Right there with you, Chris. I think it was Denis Miller who said about FaceSpace and Twatter, ‘never has a life so unlived been so well documented’. Pretty much sums it up.
0
Tell a yank that baseball is rounders and it’s predominantly girls that play it in Britain…and we call American Football….catch.
They don’t like it…..
0
Or asking them what part of Canada they are from
0
Much of America is all about appearances. The NFL is a great example. Some of those players are super fit and as ripped as you could be. But why? To play a game where the ‘action’ lasts about 10 seconds, followed by 5 minutes of standing around chatting with their mates. Seriously, what is the point of that?
I’d agree that throwing a rugby ball 50 yards under pressure and with accuracy to a team mate running at full pelt takes a degree of skill and talent. Try doing the same thing with your foot, Yankee boy. Not so easy is it? Wankers.
0
I read somewhere that several years ago when the whole Pride and Prejudice thing gained popularity over the water, some yank on a visit over here got annoyed and wondered why Jane Austen wasn’t available for book signings? Even after a tour-guide explained to this person that Jane Austen died in 1817 and has been dead for just under 200 years, apparently the response was something like “So does this mean she’s not available to sign my book then?”. Yep…some yanks really are that dumb. Keeping Uncle Semen in the same family isn’t a good idea.
1
You see the fat cunts all the time at Kings Cross Station, trying to find Platform 9 3/4.
Wankers
1
And the classic one from a yank tourist…”Why did they build Windsor Castle so close to the airport?”. Priceless. With some of them, a decent IQ isn’t on the priority list.
0
Yanks, eh? Where do I fucking start?
0
America is what happens when you export all the mongtards from Europe and release them in a new country to interbreed for 300 years. Even gene pools need a bit of chlorine…
1
The Septics that infest Manchester on the day of a United home game are priceless… One said to me at Victoria Station, ‘Say, son… D’ ya know the way to the Traf-ford Park Stadium?’ ‘Been before, mate?’ I asked… ‘A million times… In my dreams…’ was the reply from Uncle Sam… Then he said George Best was one of the ‘Buzbee Babes’, which is bollocks…
Anyway, I told him to get the Tram that goes to Bury and get off at Bury itself, which is the tram station farthest from Old Trafford…
0
Now City fans are getting the Doodle Dandy tourists at their place… Watch their looks of bewilderment when some blue asks them if they know who Colin Bell, Francis Lee, or Dennis Tueart are…
0
Septics are always good for a laugh – provided you can turn the volume down that is.
0
Cant fucking stand that silly yank slit licker Ellen Degeneres,anyone seen her show? What a daft cunt she is and who taught her to dance? I reckon it was Clyde the fucking Orangatang.
0
Ellen Degeneres is a fucking rug munching, tuppence flicking, knickerlifting, bulldyke cunt… She’s a typical Yank tosspot…
0
I can’t figure out which is the real one – her or Dorrie the Fish
0