Peter Jackson


It seems clear to me that Peter Jackson deserves a cunting.

The frizzy haired scruffy bearded kiwi cunt has clearly never heard of the word “CUT”. He makes “fantasy” films, i.e. films for kids and slow adults and he makes them long, very long indeed. His fans think the sun shines out of his arse and that he is the bestest director of all time. But they are all lame brained fucking nerds with personal hygiene issues so who gives a fuck about what they think.

Jackson, you cunt, try making a film about real life humans and bring it in at under 90 minutes and then we will see what kind of director you are. Shit in other words.

Nominated by: Fat Rich

25 thoughts on “Peter Jackson

  1. The Lord of the rings films are way too long and I always fall asleep about halfway through.

    That said, two of his early films Bad taste and Meet the feebles are cult classics shot on a budget of about £50.

    Did anyone have David Bowie in the dead pool by the way?

    • Bad Taste is a frigging brilliant film that did get airtime back in the early 90’s (I watched it at least twice on telly). Wasn’t as keen on Meet the Feebles, it felt really grimy…
      I wonder what the ponderous cunt thinks of his early oeuvre these days??

      • Agree totally about Bad Taste, absolutely brilliant movie made for fuck all money. Goes to show it takes more than a massive budget to make a good film. BrainDead was lots of fun too…

      • “Aren’t I lucky, I got a chunky bit” nearly blew my lunch all over the TV first time I saw it…..

      • I didn’t mind LOTR the first two weren’t that bad, fellowship of the ring I saw in the theater. Although the Hobbit trilogy is a load of shite and a boring 2 and half hour CGI wankfest.

  2. I would like to NOMINATE:

    Celebrities & plebs who post epitaphs & eulogy’s on Twitter when someone famous has died.
    Posting a Tweet when someone dies make me sick, if it was not bad enough every fucking celebrity posts a Tweet,
    Case in point:
    Dave Cameron posting this on the news David Bowie has died

    “I grew up listening to and watching the pop genius David Bowie. He was a master of re-invention, who kept getting it right. A huge loss.”

    Oh fuck off Dave, you never liked him, you never listened to his music, just name a song he recorded and recite more than one line, NO, you cannot do it.
    Then you have every other celebrity cunt posting thew same pointless, devoid of any true sentiment, generic RIP Tweet because they have to show some kind of empathetic remorse.
    It makes no difference 90% of these cunts never knew David Bowie, but the PR machine demands they Tweet, total fucking herd mentality!

    And as for the general public, don’t get me started, I bet if you collated every RIP post on Twitter today it would total fucking billions, all the same self-indulgent, narcissistic platitudes.


    On the plus side, someone must have had Bowie in the dead pool 😀

    • Surely there is no plus side to David Bowie dying?
      Devastated I didn’t nominate the strange-eyed cunt though.

    • David Cameron never wrote it mate, one of his many spin team wrote it and will get ‘Cams” up to speed later regarding Bowie’s most popular hits when in the course of the day Cam’s will name drop it into an unrelated interview to try and look ‘modern’ and ‘in touch’ with the voters yet still managing to get it wrong just as he did when one of his spin team told him he better pretend to support a football team so it was deemed he was a lifelong Aston Villa fan but when the fucking charlatan gave an interview about multicunturism in the UK he said this….

      “We are a shining example of a country where multiple identities work.

      “Where you can be Welsh and Hindu and British, Northern Irish and Jewish and British, where you can wear a kilt and a turban, where you can wear a hijab covered in poppies. Where you can support Man Utd, the Windies and Team GB all at the same time.

      “Of course, I’d rather you supported WEST HAM.”

      Didn’t take long for one of his spin team to try and dig him out the shit on twatter though…

      Attempting to explain what many on Twitter have judged to be the inexplicable, Cameron later clarified: “I had what Natalie Bennett described as a brain fade.

      “I’m a Villa fan … I must have been overcome by something … this morning. But there we are, these things sometimes happen when you are on the stump.”

      The acid test would be for a journalist to ask him about his front line Policing cuts wait until he’s finished answering and then ask him what he thinks is Bowie’s best album and who is Aston Villas manager and watch the cunt squirt to his knees, hisssssss like a snake and slither out the door on his belly!

      • Why is it always said that “David Cameron LEADS the tributes”…?

        Given that all his so-called tributes are written by junior advisers, the idea that the pig-bothering cunt has anything to say of any cultural relevance is beyond risible.

        Of all the people who have commented on Bowie so far, I’d say that it’s his son, the film director Duncan Jones, who has led the tributes. Not a bloated, oleaginous, pink-faced, conviction-free, lying, Old Etonian toff cunt.

  3. Im not sure what us worse, David Cameron saying this, or the first cunt on the BBC to comment, Lewis Hamilton? Fuck off Hamilton u limelight cunt.

      • With that hat, his Bleached hair and Diamond Earings he is no doubt hiding behind newspaper on a bench by a playground with a bag of sweets. The cunt.

  4. Sorry that should say “What IS worse” not what us worse – this keyboard also is up for a cunting. But Hamilton is a cunt.

    • Or as the late Frank Sidebottom used to sing, “It’s a god awful small affair to the girl with the mouse in her hair”.

  5. Anyone who actually read the Tolkien books will tell you Jackson fucking massacred them.
    He couldn’t direct traffic, let alone a movie.

    • You mean like the Elves turning up at Helms Deep in the Two Towers? He certainly fucked about with that. What annoys me, is that he released the ‘Special Editions’ so he could make even more money. I just downloaded them. From a perfectly legal and reputable source, obviously. And by sheer coincidence, they were completely free.

  6. Louis van Gaal admits he has been “very bored or angry” during some Manchester United games this season….

    Join the fucking club, you old cunt….

  7. I am sure Van Gaal won’t be there next season. Its not worked out and the cunt has spent a lot of money. Interesting to see who you’ll get in to replace him. My money is on Jose, look who that past it cunt Rooney voted for when his own manager is under pressure.

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