Dead Pool [7]

Posted on by

Ronnie Biggs arrives to attend the funeral of Bruce Reynolds-1775032

* * * * WE HAVE A WINNER! * * * *
Congratulations to Dioclese (Me!!!) who correctly guessed the next cunt to kick the cunting bucket … therefore becoming a dead cunt … would be Ronnie Biggs. And about bloody time too!

Here’s a picture of the dead cunt sticking two fingers up to the press at Bruce Reynolds funeral earlier this year. If you really want to know what a total cunt this bloke was, then take a look in Wikipedia.

So that’s the shortest dead pool yet and all bets are off and we start again. I promise to resist the temptation to crow about scoring the first hat trick! Well, maybe just a little?…

The slate has been wiped clean and everyone gets to pick a new ‘dead cunt walking’ as we move on to The Dead Pool 7.
One rule change and in case you’re new to the world of predicting bucket kicking cunts, here’s a refresher:

1. Nominate who you think is next on the way out.
You can have a maximum of three cunts each. Leave names in the Comments.

2. You win if your Cunt dies first.
Then the slate is wiped clean and we start again. Of course, you can always be a cunt and steal someone else’s dead cunt candidate from the last Dead Pool.

Any cunt who tries to cheat by nominating the World’s Oldest Man or Woman is a cunt and will be ignored. The winner gets a dedicated Dead Pool Champion post and kudos of cuntishness aplenty. Oh, and the usual “Our Blog Our Rules” thing applies.

66 thoughts on “Dead Pool [7]”

  1. Getting in quick, I’m sticking with Chapman Pincher and Kirk Douglas. My third is Pete Seeger – for crimes against music.

    “Little Boxes”? Could be prophetic?

  2. Not only a train robbing cunt, but guilty of far greater crimes against music.

    The cunt recorded two songs with the Sex Pistols for their Great Rock ‘n’ Roll Swindle album, “No One is Innocent” (aka “The Biggest Blow (A Punk Prayer)”/”Cosh The Driver”) and “Belsen Was a Gas”. Very tasteful. Amazingly the former was released as a single and reached number 7 in June 1978.

    Biggs also recorded “Police on My Back” and “Carnival in Rio (Punk Was)” by German punk band Die Toten Hosen in 1991. In 1993, Biggs sang on three tracks for the album “Bajo otra bandera” by Argentinian punk band Pilsen.

    If you really can’t resist it, here’s a link on YouTube : http://youtu.be/Tk1osVnYt0s

    Yes, for crimes against music alone they should have hung the fucker

  6. I’m going for the following:

    Wayne Rooney
    Katie Price
    Ellie Goulding

    More based on wishful thinking rather than probability

    • Rooney? Yes please. Jordan? Waste of air just like her ex. Do we really give a flying about their reality TV series? No. Not really.

      Added to the list. Cheers!

      • I’m probably alone with the Ellie Goulding one. Her girly breathless whiny singing style and bland songs are just really getting on my tits, And she lists Bjork as an influence, says it all…..

    • Scrub that list! Gristle has just nearly pecked me bollocks orf. New Gristle approved thesp list:

      Eli Wallach
      Louis Jourdan
      Luise Rainer (oldest living Oscar winner at 103)

      • Oooooohhhhhhh! Sailing close to the wind. Rules clearly state “Any cunt who tries to cheat by nominating the World’s Oldest Man or Woman is a cunt and will be ignored.”

        103 years old is definitely pushing it!…..

        I shall ponder upon it! After all, rules is rules!

        But then who was it said ‘rules are for the obedience of idiots and the guidance of wise men’? Some cunt.

        I’m sure some of the others might like to join in this debate? Any views, anyone?

      • She is not the world’s oldest woman dear heart and certainly not the world’s oldest cunt so entirely eligible as the rules now stand. I am backed by Gristle on this. Anyway knowing my luck she probably will go on to be the world’s longest ever living woman.

  8. If that is how you wish to deal your cards then I will take Christopher Lee and may the Devil take you.

  9. I’m going for:

    1. George Cole. Looked half dead already on the box the other night.
    2. Muhammad Ali. Parkinsons has to finish the cunt off soon.
    3. Ian Watkins. A bit of wish fulfilment but hopefully somebody at Her Maj’s Pleasure will do what our courts no longer can. Preferably as painful and protracted as possible…

  10. For a Christmas present, I would wish for:
    1. Ian Brady ( for obvious reasons)
    2. Robert Mugabe
    3. Alex Salmond

  11. For fuck sake Mr D, did you inject ricin into old Bigsy to push the cunt over the edge? Anyway, I’m going for my previous trio;
    Myley Cyrus
    Shawn MacGowan
    Richard O’Sullivan

  12. Well done Dioclese. Biggsy has been on your radar for quite sometime. Patience has it’s rewards!

    Ok: 1) Freddie Starr
    2) Ian Duncan Shit
    3) As Norden has been nabbed I’ll take George Bush Snr

  13. Shawn MacGowan (Irish Cunt)
    Bruce Foreskin Forsyth (well we can fuckin dream)
    Katie ( Id like to kick you fucking face) Hopkins, vitriolic cunt if there ever was one.

    • good call on katie hopkins, we can only hope, and who would have thought shane mcgowan would outlive kirsty mccoll, there really is no justice!

    • Shawn MacGowan has already been nabbed by me. Though to be fair to the cunt the man has the constitution of Keith Richards and may go on for ever unless someone cuts off his alcohol supply.

      • Then nominate your own original cunt Occams Razor. We continue to scan the obituaries with you in mind. Can you not feel our love?

  17. Had a £1 bet with my brother, was convinced he died about 4 years ago, he clearly didn’t though, maybe it was a dream! I lost a quid coz of that cunt.

  18. Commiserations go to Dim Reaper who correctly forecast the demise of Mikhail Kalashnikov, designer of the terrorists’ weapon of choice.

    Unfortunately, he forecast said demise in Dead Pool 6 – so nice try but no trophy!

    Dead Pool 7 continues…

  19. In any other Dead Pool I’d take Murray Walker. Trouble here is that he isn’t a cunt and I’ll be sorry to see the bloke croak. Ex-Scots Greys and a top chap.

    So I’ll take Acker Bilk, Dennis Healy and Benedict XVI (Pope, retd)

    Is it cheating if I pick Justin Beiber and then make it happen?

    • Yeah Murray isn’t a cunt but your in the right ball park. I wonder if Michael Schumacher had Murray Walkers voice in his head as he was hurtling down the mountain? “It’s Schumacher, there’s been a shunt”….. Bet Damon Hill is pissing himself!

      • Where to start ……….she epitomizes the worst aspects of smug cuntiferousness ,whilst bleating interminably on about God alone knows what, in a soapy ,pubefest of scandalous drivel.Bracket the birch with the previously mentioned Blunt-Cunt and you have the win double of fuckers spouting nonsense Twatitudes . Surely a great reason to get up a mob and put them to t he fire.

  21. David walliams, cilla black, almost all politicians , the French, micheal Parkinson,Tim henman, the manager of the bankers draft in eltham and Mr Mario……….Major league counts all

  25. Ariel Sharon’s looking very doddery.

    Can I temporarily drop ex-Pope Benedict from my 3 and take Sharon?
    Don’t think I’ll need to borrow him for more than a couple of weeks if the reports are true.

  27. I can confirm that nobody nominated Phil Everley.

    And perhaps I should have allowed Schumacher because it looks like he’s going to survive

    • Yes The Eye has it. That means a new Dead Pool then.I had Sharon a few pools back and could never get on quick enough to claim him back.

      So to get in there first I am reclaiming some of my original candidates for Dead Pool 8:

      Richard Attenborough
      Muhammed Ali
      Christopher Lee

    • Confirmed – congrats to the Eye who wins it with a late entry…

      I get round to resetting pool #8 tomorrow.

Comments are closed.