Misery me musicians like Leonard ‘whinging cunt’ Cohen are a genre from the dark side. Dog’s died, facing a disbility allowance reappraisal and the bastard bailiffs are at the door again? Run a nice hot bath, get in, settle down and open your veins while playing any Smiths album in the background..

Or there is Mister Misery Lou (Berlin) Reed, Elvis (don’t make me laugh) Costello and old wail of despair Bawb Dylen. Point is for the depressing cunts our misery is their pension. Every time one of their songs is played they receive a royalty. Every time some poor punter fills his car up for the last time on the way to Beachy Head one of those cunts gets a royalty. Every time some terminally ill fucker buys a one way ticket to Switzerland one of those cunts gets a royalty.

Neil Young, Lou Reed, Joy Division, Katatonia, Morrisey…ja ja ve kill you without drugs here. Music to slit your throat to…

I can only bear to lift the coffin lid on a few of the misery merchants. I leave the rest to stronger cunters than I.

Nominated by : Sir Limply Stoke

My cunty son lives in Australia and hates them fucking Abos. For you cunty northern hemicunts, der Abos are Asylum seekers that came to Australia two thousand years ago. Australian border control is fucking shit.

And when did illegal immigrants become ‘Asylum seekers’ anyway? Them black cunts are really black and stand on one leg, or is that fuzzy wuzzy cunts; can’t tell the fucking difference. But their kids are blond- what der fuck?

Anyway, they still get pissed all the time and piss their pants in the middle of the street in the middle of the day. Should send these black Abo cunts back to Abocuntland. Or burn them. How do you get a Abo women pregnant? You come on her foot and let the flies do the work. Black Abo cunts.

Nominated by : Flaxen Saxon