37 thoughts on “The veteran survey

  1. Sorry to sound like a dumb cunt but what is this abaaaht? Is there some discrepancy about the meaning of Veteran? Surely not just HM? What about the Septic vets etc?

    I’ll get my coat.

    • The septic’s as you call them have the American Legion, (I recall this as I was the first to mention RBL on this site) So probably not, taking into account the subject is the RBL,
      Call me racist if you want.

      • I have great respect for the American service personnel and entirely withdraw my inappropriate use of the word ‘Septic’. I shall only use this word for the ilk of Hollywood and the Clinton loving press.

  2. I’m a bit perplexed by these random pages that keep coming up, like Jack the Cunter’s on speculative poofery and now this one….is it a case of anything goes here at the moment? Or is this a big boss’s call?

    My Dad was a Petty officer in the Royal Navy for 10 years. Not me of course. I was cunt enough to go into nursing, sadly.

    • Yes (Merchant Navy for a few years, but I’m now a Baron of Beef.
      Actually, if you look closely, this is a reply to Nurse Cuntee

          • Just as well. I am eating a lot of protein these days.

            Coronavirus has nothing on my farts lately….surgical mask? You’d need a fucking gas mask.

        • No, I’m sorry Nurse. Didn’t expect any reply from you but I didn’t think it was very difficult to understand my meaning either.

          When I said “Yes”, I was replying to the suggestion in the nom: “Veterans that means people who served HM forces just say yes below.”

          Obviously the Merchant Navy is not HM Forces, so if I was really John Prescott that would have been misleading. When I wrote “I am now a Baron of Beef” it was a joke, as John Prescott is now a Baron on the House of Lords. The “beef’ bit is because John Prescott is very fat and jowelly but used to be a boxer (hence” beefy”).

          When I finished my comment with “Actually, if you look closely, this is a reply to Nurse Cuntee”, I meant that my comment “Yes” was also a reply to your question “….is it a case of anything goes here at the moment? Or is this a big boss’s call?”

          So to sum up –

          🔫”Yes” to the nom – I was in HM Forces (if you count the merchant navy).
          🔫”Yes” to Nurse Cunty that this is case of anything goes, and the big boss’s call.
          🔫The “Nurse Cuntee” bit was a mistake, it should have been “Nurse Cunty”. I didn’t mean you were the Cuntee, you are the Cunter. Sorry about that.
          🔫I’m not really John Prescott.

          But if I was, I can honestly say I’ve not had so much trouble explaining myself away since the time when I had to explain to Pauline why I was fucking that intern chick over the leather topped desk in the Admiralty building all those years ago. Happy days!

          I hope with sincerity this clears up any misunderstandings, and affords you a sounder sleep unconcerned by weird cunts replying to your remarks on here.

          Night Night, Nurse. (nothing to do with the over-the-counter medication)

          • Ahh, thank you Mr P. That makes it all clear now. You are right in saying that it probably was all clear to begin with, but insomnia has my mental clarity a little…well, to put it mildly….FUCKED.

            I’m not averse to weird cunts as I am one myself, so fair dos.

            Night, Night to you too, Mr P.

          • Thank Dog for that.
            At least you’re not John Bercunt.

            I am not a member, nor ever have been, of HM armed forces, but genuinely believe that either MOSSAD or BOSS tried to recruit me (in about 1983 – 84, towards end of my university period), just off Manningham Lane. They offered me “vacation work” in Hungary. When I said I didn’t speak Hungk, she disappeared pd smartly, apologising for having wasted my time. Probably saved my life.

          • The NightNurse isn’t having any effect, so I’m still here.

            I had a kind of similar experience to yours HBL. In the first week of my last year I found a MASSIVE piece of draw in a wardrobe in my room. It was very smelly black Morrocan, about the size of a small shoe box
            It might have been my second day back at university, and the room was in a house owned by the University. To make matters worse, there were a couple of police cars parked across the road.

            I immediately went to see my tutor and told him what I’d found. He advised me to go to the police station and “report a crime”. He also told me to go to see the Chaplain (who was well-known as a recruiter for intelligence services).I didn’t do either, but instead went to the pub and had a couple of drinks to calm me down. I decided to take the risk, not tell the police or the chaplain, but instead keep it and sell/smoke it myself!

            When I went back to my room, the draw had gone. I found out a couple of years later that this was a fairly standard recruitment exercise by the MOSSAD.

            It didn’t work, because I sort of ended up working for “other side”. Make of that what you like (and no, i don’t mean MI6, btw), but that is a 100% true story.

            At the time, I wondered if I was losing my marbles, and was scared shirtless, which was part of the plan. I now know I wasn’t.

  3. Yes. Army 22 and a half years.

    Boris’s government has made a good start by introducing the Veteran’s Rail Card later this year. Other “covenant” stuff is largely bollocks. For example, I tried applying for social housing when I left – mostly to test the system – not a chance behind the immos, slags, scroungers and druggies. So the rail card is actually a good start.

    • You would be surprised, apart from the disabled card, the veteran card came in handy, not in getting here but for further residents, I have my own little exclusion zone round me, admittedly I live in Beirut but it is not peaceful….

        • Local crime figures would indicate so, First time I have ever had to fit a cctv system to a place where I live and then put up a couple of dummy systems free of charge on other residents places to push the tide back. (worked though)

  4. Yep total fucking piss take. Money grabbing bastards who wouldn’t know what end a bullet came out of an SA80a2

    I would, and I think they are shit. however your answer in context with the question?

  5. Para’s 3rd battalion (3 para) 2000-2008 .
    Me and me mate joined at the same time both did P company together and he went onto 2 para and i went into 3 para .
    When it came to doing the milling the PT instructor knew we were good friends so they put us against each other (ouch)
    He stayed 2 years more than me as i decided to come out when my soon was born , my mate ended up having a big drink problem and last year i called into see him and i found him dead in the house , he feel downstairs pissed up and cracked his skull open on the side board , proper fucked me up that did. Just goes to show you can have all the training in the world and yet something like that can just take it all away. I just went back to being a plasterer what i did after leaving school/

    • Sorry about your pal and Para, Telly as it is. Recently watched the documentary about Para Joe’s trying to get the maroon beret, fucking hard core blokes. Never been in the military but quite a few of my family have served. My Auntie lost close friends when she served in the Royal Navy when HMS Sheffield was hit in the Falklands. I’m an avid reader and watcher of anything military. I don’t want to sound patronising but anybody who joins the military and is willing to put their life on the line for us is a fucking hero in my book. Pisses me off that we don’t celebrate our military like the Yanks do but we can’t upset the ethnic minority’s can we? Thanks to all who have served on Is a Cunt.

      • Thanks mate but these things happen , before we signed up we knew we had to have a certain level of fitness so we used to meet up after work and go running . After awhile we would jog with rucksacks on and fill them with rocks gradually getting heavier . There was a guy in our village who was ex para and he gave us some insight into how to prepare and what to expect . Like i said i came out when my son was born as i didn’t want to be away all the time and i’d done 8 years , i was fortunate to have my old trade to fall back being a plasterer never looked back since.

        • When you mention upsetting the ethnics Bob i put in a recent post about when i was in barking east London . I think i’d been out the forces around a year and there was a march in barking from soldiers returning from abroad. The amount of fucking dirty filthy muslim’s protesting shouting all sorts of hate was horrible , to make matters worse they were allowed there own protest march after. The funny thing is the EDL was there in force and was throwing pork sausages at the muslim’s 😄

  6. Never served, but always regret not taking up the offer of a commission in the RAF for Air Traffic Control, as it wasn’t what I wanted to do. Much preferred the option to deal with electronic aircraft systems but, being of Eastern European descent, was deemed a security risk as I had family back there.

  7. NOTE: ” Nominations ” like these, you can’t have nominations like these, it indicates a very low standard of non existent quality control, it’s a stub at best.

  8. Yes, Royal Artillery, 24 years, 1989-2013. I’m sorry if the nomination upset you, but as I said in it, I wasn’t having a go at the majority of RBL employees, they do a fantastic job, just the ones at the top who make the decisions.

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