Cocky Tourists

A cunting for arrogant, disrespectful tourists who treat other people’s home countries like they’re theme parks that exist for rich westerners personal amusement. A skank was arrested the other day in Muslim Maldives for wearing a bikini in a public place, which from the locals point of view is like going naked:

Now I’m no fan of Islam, but it is their country and this cocky bint thinks, “oh well, I’ll do whatever I want to do, make way for me and my human rights”. They have a right to have their own country, with their own customs, social norms, and laws. When going abroad, a person should respect other peoples tradition and not trample on them like “well, I’m so rich compared to these peasants I’ll just do as I please. I’m special!”  You’re not special. You don’t even belong there, so respect others’ cultures. Their home nation isn’t one big resort that only exists for your pleasure and entertainment.

I’ve got no sympathy with cunts who go abroad and naively expect those foreign lands to be like home, that you should enjoy the same privileges as here, and then get themselves banged up for spitting in the face of the hosts.

Nominated by Agent Double-O Shagga

111 thoughts on “Cocky Tourists

  1. Despicable people. Drink copiously until drunk, throw up, abuse the natives, demand food and meals from their home country, make no effort to adapt to the environment however fleetingly they’re there, have no respect for the culture or language, and speak loudly, curtly, and loquaciously in their own tongue.

    The British are quite revolting abroad.

    • They come here act like they do back in the sand dunes, why shouldnt we?
      Mutual disrespect.
      Now then Ali baba, order me a camel, and fetch me your most comely goat!

        • He most certainly would!
          Dress it in your finest silk veil Ahmed
          And stuff its bra wi turkish delight!

      • You beat me to it MNC. Who gives a fuck?
        These 🐫 jockies don’t give a fuck about our laws so fuck the towel head cunts.
        Go on dear get your thruppeny bits out…yeeehhhaaa.

        • Spot on. Visit an Islamic shitehole…for holiday ??!
          I don’t need to; step outside my front door, and all divershitty is on my doorstep (and on the soles of my shoes…).
          When in Rome, ask for directions to the vomitarium…

    • She should come to Cambridge and run around wearing her Extinction Rebellion bikini. The useless waste of space police here would do the square root of eff all…

      I went all over the world when I worked including many peaceful countries. The very simple rule wherever I went was “their country, “their rules.”

      The Russian plod did pull up in their car and look me up and down in Red Square at three in the morning but in fairness to them it was too cold to get out of their car.

    • Quite correct Capt. I reside in the middle of France, and it makes my piss boil to see British tourists wandering about, without wearing a black beret or a string of onions. Ignorant cunts.

    • I’ be been to the Maldives and most women wore bikini’s without anybody batting an eyelid.I can only assume ( didn’t read story) that she wasn’t on one of the islands that’s marketed as a holiday destination.

  2. I totally agree agent, however it is a double edged sword, I am more than happy to abide by their laws in their country, but it would be nice if they did the same over here, Giving little girls drugs and then giving them to your mates to fuck is illegal here (both counts) and most Islamic countries have a death penalty for drugs, which they conveniently forget when they are over here.

    • Totally agree with you there LB , i mean being arrested just for wearing a bikini is really nothing , even more so in this day and age . I do understand the whole respect thing but as you pointed out it would be nice if they did the same over here but they don’t and they take it to levels way beyond just wearing a bikini . They get offended by a woman in a bikini but yet they are willing to sleep with 13 year old’s . Britain has surly got to be one of the (if not the most)
      disrespected country in the world by foreigners .

    • Yes, but you could argue that if our police and laws weren’t so fucking soft they wouldn’t be here taking the piss in the first place. That’s the trouble with mouthy drunken Brits abroad…….they think the foreign cops are soft as shit like ours. They’re not…….fuck about with those cunts and you’ll know all about it. Behave yourself and be polite and you won’t have a problem. Act like a cunt and you’ll soon be crying about your yewman rites , which they don’t give a flying one about.
      As far as i’m concerned Brits abroad get what they deserve so fuck ‘em.

      • I agree with you on the police being soft but we all know that they way our country is now if the police took no shit you would have all the lefties etc police brutality and racism. The Brits do get out of control abroad and i remember going to Benidorm on holiday as a kid . I would have been only around 8-9 and i was with my parents sat outside a bar and this Spanish guy came around dressed as Charlie Chaplin doing the thing Charlie did. He wasn’t causing no harm it was just an act he did round the pubs and everyone loved it. Well there was a table of rowdy English lads drunk and one of them decided to go up to this guy dressed up and fuck about knocking his hat off and pushing him about , the next thing he started to punch this Spanish guy in the face good and proper while all his mates laughed until some guys broke it up . The guy did no wrong and i remember him after that sat on the floor all dazed it was horrible to see i was only young , iv’e never forgot that . I remember thinking to myself even that young that someone would have given that rowdy English guy and his mates a proper good hiding .

        • The arse responsible should have been jailed and made to pay damages. A harmless guy having fun and a drunken twat ruining it.
          Sounds fucking awful.

    • Two wrongs don’t make a right. The fact that our authorities let cunts from abroad get away with breaking our laws and disrespecting our customs doesn’t mean our cunts should be allowed carte blanche to do what they like in other people’s countries.

      Btw, the bint in the header looks pretty fit from the waist down. If I were the police in that country I’d take her down to the cells and have her pull a Müzzie train.

  3. Fuck the Maldives. We should send HMS Queen Elizabeth to level the whole thing to ashes for manhandling an English rose. Muslim cunts.

  4. If it meant the fuckers over here reciprocating in the same way, then I’d be in agreement. But until then, I frankly couldn’t give a fuck.
    What I do object to, is these halfwits expecting the British embassy to step in to help get them out of the shit.

  5. The problem here is mixed signals.

    They have specific private areas where tourists CAN wear bikinis and the usual anything goes holiday stuff, but this stupid, arrogant cunt was fucking well walking down the street in that skimpy bikini thing she was wearing, in an area that was NOT touristy and the decency rules apply.

    Let’s be honest here. The Maldives make a shitload of income from tourism. If there are specific places that are excluded from idiots like this – and SHE IS an idiot as she thought that because she could do that in the resort, she could do it everywhere else she liked – then they should make it VERY plain.

    I agree with the premise of this nom though. When you are in a foreign country, you should respect the place, its traditions and religion. We cannot moan about that if we expect it from the cunts who land on our doorstep. I am just saying that the water is muddied when like here, you have two things happening at once.

    Frankly, I never understand any woman who walks down the street in a bikini and ONLY a bikini and nothing covering it, like a beach dress or shorts. To me it screams of an attention-seeking slapper. I visit Gran Canaria twice a year and I have done for over 20 years. You see this cuntery all of the time and quite honestly, mostly from women who really need to cover up that shit!! On the beach is fine, but on the street is taking the piss in ANY country.

    • Mind you our ‘British’ London mayor banned photos of bikinis never mind the real thing.
      I’ve been embarrassed many times by arrogant behaviour by a certain kind of Brit tourist.
      ‘Eh Pedro, uno beero and an ouzo chaser and where’s me fookin’ chips got to’?
      Not a good look i’m afraid.

      • True indeed, SH.

        I’ve seen plenty of them too when in Gran Can. It is so embarrassing when you get Brits like that making a complete chav arsehole of themselves.

  6. Hope she was guzzling 🍺 and dancing.
    These fuckers have no respect for us so up em.
    To be honest we should respect other countries laws always but these peacefuls really take the biscuit. Respect us but we’ll piss all over your laws.


  7. One avoids certain places home and abroad now for a number of reasons… One is because of peaceful camelfuckers and their terrorist activities… Another is the bogo bogo hordes who have turned once great cities like Paris and London into crime riddled slums…

    Then there is that special class of very British vermin… Pissed up and badly behaved as possible shite who infest places like Cyprus and Spain… Binge drinking wankers and knickerless tattooed slags who spoil it for every other cunt…

  8. As far as I’m concerned this bint should have faced an extra charge of making false allegations against police officers for screeching they’re sexually assaulting her when just trying to arrest her for breaking the law.

    BTW her name is Cecilia Jastrzembska and ”was arrested after strolling past a mosque and a school on Maafushi, an island in the Maldives where it is illegal to wear bikinis except on designated beaches because of strict Muslim Sharia laws.” She’s been on reality TV shows as is a parliamentary advisor apparently.

      • Used to be you could count on Brits having British names. In Germany they have a list of approved names that people have to legally choose from – naturally peacefuls are exempt. But I think it’s a really easy way to try and integrate massive numbers of foreigners – want to live here and leech off us? Then call your son John you devil-worshiping cunt. No more mohammeds.

        That explains why most Pikey’s are called Lee or Smith

  9. An emergency cunting for 25 “speciesism” protesters blocking the gates of the Tulip pig abattoir on the outskirts of Manchester, funnily enough you never see the cunts outside Halal establishments, they don’t want “Allah’s sword of peace” across their throats!
    Cunts to man and beast they are!

    • I actually find this a bit embarrassing. A German just wasted 10 peacefuls in Hamburg, this hoody cunt stabbed a single OAP – and it’s not even life-threatening.

    • Angry ginger bloke, Thought it was ex prince harry on a publicity stunt, So I will go far right (in fact so far right he missed the artery)

        • Dispute over a purchase at the local marketplace . . .

          “Hey, Abdul, I’ve got a bone to pick with you! Do you know that Islamic sex doll you sold me? It blew itself up.”

          • It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than a moose limb to extract himself from a goat’s arsehole.
            And correct me if I’m wrong, I don’t think it was Confucius that said that.

    • Has to be Tommy Robinson or is it Tony Robinson? Yeah that’s it, time team wanted to dig up the mosque because they had been told their was some English culture buried under it.

      Elderly Mo says no way Baldrick cunt and a fight ensued.

  10. Just uploaded a late and very overdue severe cunting for the shower of shitshow “DAVE THE RAPPER CUNT”.
    I have uploaded in to the Nominations section.
    This little prick needs 20 Noms or indeed his own Dave The Cunt domain name.

    • If he’s that unhappy, and if it’s such an awful country to be in (compared to where Dave, compared to where exactly??), then – given his UK financed upbringing, riches and success – he can always choose to fuck off back to his parents’ gaff – Nigeria – if we’re so fucking bad!

      Well, I say parents, but really that should be Mum because I’m betting a chippy cunt like this didn’t have much in the way of Fatherly guidance? I mean, I am just guessing here, seeing how it’s the norm with Africunt spawn…

      “Dave was born David Orobosa Omoregie on 5 June 1998 in the Brixton area of London, the youngest of three brothers born to Nigerian parents. He was raised in nearby Streatham by a single mother, as his father was absent during his childhood.” (source Wikipedia)

      Wow! Lucky guess eh!

  11. I’ve got no sympathy with cunts who go abroad and naively expect those foreign lands to be like home, that you should enjoy the same privileges as here, and then get themselves banged up for spitting in the face of the hosts.

    And yet WE have to put up with cunts in Burkas here, and WE are not allowed to say anything about that are we?

    I agree wholeheartedly with the sentiment, I just wish WE were as vociferous in implementing the same tolerance levels towards dress that offends OUR sensitivities and that have no place in OUR society.


  12. Their country their rules. Problem Is these woke cunts who spend 50 weeks a year slagging of their fellow white Brits then go abroad and find out the wider world isn’t full of fluffy unicorns after all.

    • Yeah, like “Dave the Crapper” mentioned above.

      I’d love to see that cunt go to Nigeria and denigrate the locals and the authorities there with same fervour he directs towards the white British, who welcomed his sorry mother’s Nigerian arse over here, only for her to drop this ungrateful cunt into a life of the UK benefits gravy-train!

      Do you think he would be lorded in Nigeria for this dissent as he is here in blighty, or do you think he’d be enjoying a burning tyre necklace right about now?

      And now he’s a minted Brit Award winner. Yes what a harsh and unfair society Dave. I’m sure you would have been much better off under the benefits system in Nigeria mate, and as we’re so bad, please feel free to fuck off back there then!


  13. Hmmmm might be a reaction to the jihad rape gang . It could have pushed him over the edge.
    Mental illness.
    Far right would have used an automatic .

  14. The worst behaved are by far Yanks and Brits. Obnoxious, chavvy cunts who are barely able to tie their own shoelaces chowing down on bacon sandwiches and piss lager. Hooligans and stag-doers are particularly bad. I avoid the European cities now because of the hoards of fat barbarians who eventually get fleeced, beaten up or served a few Mickey Finns and robbed. Confiscate their passports.

  15. Hold on hold on.

    The woman was Cecilia Jastrzembska, reality TV star, instagram celebrity etc.

    Publicity stunt anyone.

    Google her.

      • Here we go, found it!!
        Shes a right little honey!💘 💘
        Definitely a stunt for media attention,
        Those filthy maldivens manhandling her!
        Shes over 13yr not your type, gerroff her!
        I was her agent that name would be gone first thing,
        Rebrand her ‘ Honey The bikini atoll!!

    • She has been on telly before, but I don’t think it was a deliberate stunt as she’s not done any interviews or promotion since. And a blonde bird who deliberately gets herself imprisoned in a mudslime country wearing nothing but a two piece really is taking her pink arsehole in her hands so to speak.

  16. Good cunting. THE SAME APPLIES to foreign cunts coming here and importing their fucking religion, misogyny, homophobia, Jew hatred and rapiness. Also the other Eastern European influx not of the “peaceful” nature, thieves, scammers & scum who see us as rich pickings, nicking anything not nailed down.

    • Rapiness is either the joy one drives from rap or the behaviour of somebody who’s a tad rapey.

      Perhaps a mixture of both. “That chap over there in the tracksuit and doorag is displaying signs of rapiness.”

  17. Me and the missus avoid unpleasantness abroad by holidaying in Dear Old Blighty.
    This however, can have foreign linked friction. Last year we experienced an unsavoury incident with a ‘ Cocky Tourist ‘.
    We were relaxing by the river in Canterbury, it was a glorious day and there were lots of people, including many children, enjoying the sunshine.
    There was a chap of North African origin swimming in the river, which was quite shallow, he stood up, he was bollock naked. He started washing himself, slowly and deliberately, the cunt was posing. People, especially women with prams, started turning around, refusing to pass him. A black chap took him to task, but wouldn’t get close, the ‘ Cocky ( ! ) Tourist ‘ just kept bowing from the waist, with his hands pressed together, like a child at prayer.
    Having witnessed this nonsense for long enough, I telephoned Kent Police Headquarters and outlined the disgraceful spectacle taking place in England’s Green and Pleasant . To give them their due, they turned up toot sweet and put the cuffed bounder in the back of a meat wagon, along with his tax payer funded bicycle.
    It’s a fucking disgrace when you can’t sit in an English Country Garden eating an ice cream, without some filthy dark key cunt waving his tackle around.
    Boris should launch a massive de bollocking programme.
    Gertcha !!!

    • I forgot to add … when he’d been removed, I wandered down to the spot, and there in the water, glistening in the sunshine, was a pair of shiny scissors, he must have had them in between his ‘ praying hands ‘,no wonder the other chap kept his distance.

      • Listen Jack. He was probably a “Cockney tourist” not a “Cocky tourist” which would explain a lot. You just can’t tell the difference between them these days.

          • Im of a similar outlook in that we holiday in the UK,
            Rather give British people my holiday money,
            Tried abroad when kids were younger, but it was rubbish.
            Hated the heat, the food, the whole thing.
            Hated abroad, love the UK!
            Luckily no naked black men with scissors upto now.

          • No country like it MNC. The only ones that come remotely close, are some of those we colonised.
            Like you, I’m spending my money here.

          • We are truly the best of british arent we Jack?
            Selfless, Patriotic, thoughtful,
            Not a fuckin mention in the new years honours!!
            Role models we are.
            Buy British, holiday British, stay British!🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧

          • Not tried Scandinavia Miserable? Visiting your Viking brethren, great feasts of hog with busty wenches serving flagons of beer and the weather is just right too!

          • No LL, Norway an Sweden are somewhere id actually visit, cool climate, nice scenery,
            But when suggested it to missus M, she pulled a face!
            Whined about never warm, snow etc.
            Patiently explained to her if you jog for 10mins you warm up, or chop some wood!
            No pleasing some….

          • You’re lucky if you can get a woman to do the hoovering these day let alone chop fucking wood.

        • Canterbury is a Remain-voting shithole full of pîkeys and the lowest form of East Euro Dooshka-Dooshka criminal scûmbags. Your négro at his ablutions was probably the most educated there, and certainly the cleanest.

  18. What a mixture, foreigners and rude British tourists. They’re all cunts and they deserve each other. And you don’t even have to go abroad to see this clash of cultures, thanks to our immigration policy.

  19. A peaceful has stabbed another peaceful at the Saudi funded London central mosque.

    Let the fun commence…..

        • Bertie
          I can write, but cant read.
          Was to embarrassed to tell anyone.
          Missus M read me your Cat Stevens nom,
          Wild world is my favourite, beautiful.

      • Hello, this is Bertie Blunt. I am so far up my own arsehole, there is no way back. I think this might be my 5 mins of fame that someone promised me. Right, bring it on!

      • Okay, I can’t toss off to Justin Bieber videos and watch this site at the same time….

  20. Where possible I avoid conflict, I have noticed that a lot of Brit’s assume that speaking slowly and loudly, and chucking in a few words from an unconnected language makes it all good.
    Now I will give you a true example.
    I went with a colleague to a “Restaurant” in an eastern European hotel.
    we were the only people there and no service.
    My colleague decided that it would be a good idea to use his knife (eating not combat) to flick butter from the butter dish at some of the pictures in the eating area whilst we waited.
    eventually a waiter appeared and he gave us both menus, mine was in English I pointed at the number next to my choice(mixed grill) and the waiter took my menu.
    My colleague had difficulty with his, because he had been given a Croatian menu.
    He had to act out his entire order (ham and eggs with chips) Durring the exchange, the waiter gave me a few worried glances, but I was happy to go along with it because he had acted like a total cunt.

    • Yeah no point upsetting the natives when abroad,
      We after all are ambassadors for our country!
      Plus its always wise to stay on the right side of someone whose dealing with your dinner!

      • ……….and presenting you with your bill in the morning.
        Porn channel? What fucking porn channel? I didn’t even know there was one you Kraut bitch!

  21. Brits on the piss are a national disgrace, good, that slapper got a short sharp shock. Once our trailblazing nation produces upstanding citizens we can still turn around and show the world our way is the right way. Her, her tramp associates and the feral oik element deserve a proper 3rd world kicking to teach them the error of their ways. Have some self respect you ubiquitous whore droppings.
    As for the shit skins who abuse our nations renowned hospitality, let’s see some positive action from the plod and the beak fraternity, are you in or out?
    Arse biscuits on the fuckometer.

  22. Attention seeking cunt was on first dates, by the look of the picture that’s probably how those cunts in the Maldives do first dates as well

  23. Honey, i mean Cecilia is ok, just didnt know the rules.
    Lets buy her some flowers!!💘

  24. And her name reads like somebody took a bag of scrabble blocks and dumped them on the table.
    Fucking heathen tramp.

  25. The reason for them being worried about infidel whores wandering around in next to fuck all compared to the covered over from head to toe moustachioed hairy mosters that most of their bints are, is down to the fact that if any of the male goat fuckers see more that the back of a hairy hand they completely lose their shit and cant control themselves and then you end up with a Cyprus situation, Brit slapper must have known it wasnt a good idea,she needs to count her lucky stars she wasnt gang pumped, or maybe she is a mouse and was looking for some action, who knows but while these cunts cant behave here and some our our retards miss behave their who give a fuck……

  26. The reason for them being worried about infidel whores wandering around in next to fuck all compared to the covered over from head to toe moustachioed hairy mosters that most of their bints are, is down to the fact that if any of the male goat fuckers see more that the back of a hairy hand they completely lose their shit and cant control themselves and then you end up with a Cyprus situation, Brit slapper must have known it wasnt a good idea,she needs to count her lucky stars she wasnt gang pumped, or maybe she is a mouse and was looking for some action, who knows but while these cunts cant behave here and some our our retards miss behave their who give a fuck……i used to care about shit like but now fuck em…

  27. I believe treat people how you want to be treated.

    I haven’t been abroad in a very long time. I’d like to one day.

    • Somewhere with a dirty name,
      mount wank!
      Depart from cockermouth.
      Stop being dirty Spoons
      You naughty boy.

    • There are two Tits in Algeria.
      Two Twatts in Scotland.
      An ‘Anus’ and an ‘Arse’ in France.
      ‘Rectum’ is far up Germany.

      • I wonder what ‘Bullshit Hill’ is like in Sumner?

        ‘Dildo’ in Chad. I wonder what size it is?

      • Two Twatts in Scotland ??! What a surprise; one’s the S nazi party leader, and the other will be in prison soon.

        Gobbler’s Knob (something to do with Groundhog Day) sticks in my mind…

  28. English football hooligans abroad, they were hard. Some guttural bald cunt lobbing a plastic chair, I’m scared. Put them back in time to a trench in The Somme, or landing on Sword Beach, they would shit themselves or die of a heart attack (hopefully) through lack of exercise. I’ve acted a bit of a tit whilst pissed abroad (getting pissed with the locals) but I never forgot a simple respect of the country I was in. I knew when to reign it in. Plus knowing, unlike our coppers in the UK, the local coppers would have no qualms in battering my head with a baton and stomping on my bollocks.

  29. I would not entirely agree. We were all born naked and there is no shame in it. A woman’s body is a beautiful thing, and should not be covered up or hidden.

    Their coverall dressing is backward, retarded and unhealthy. The way they treat girls and women is completely disgusting.

    It would be far better for Islam culture to be stamped out completely. All Gods and religion and religious icons are fictional fairy tales, including Christianity, Catholics, Islam and all other, and Jewry, none has a place in a new modern society.

    I am minded of a few British and Europeans whilst living, working or holidaying in Dubai, Kuwait, UAE etc. they have been arrested and imprisoned for such infractions as kissing a lady on a beach (who was their girlfriend or wife) and wearing bikinis. It is their locals regimes that is in the wrong, much like that old episode of Star Trek, where you weren’t allowed to walk on the grass, and it was the death penalty if you did.

    Modern life would be far, far, far, better if NO Muslimists had ever come over here to the UK and Europe, Islam has their own country and culture and should stay there in Pakiland and the Middle East etc.

  30. Yeah she’s a drunken slapper who I’d be embarrassed to holiday with. But I’m with others on this. We’ll put on an extra layer in your gaff when you stop blowing up our kids.

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