The Beckhams

Another day another self indulgent PR exercise from the ageing ex pop tart, who for purposes of this stunt regards her 16 year old son as a *child*:

Granted this appears in George Osborne’s shitty comic, but how much longer is that dreary miserable tart going to ponce off the name of her dickhead husband, who himself has been over the hills for years. A pair of shagged out old has-beens now using their ugly kids to satisfy their lust for publicity.

Nominated by W. C. Boggs

30 thoughts on “The Beckhams

  1. Saw him in Japan in 2002. Idolised by the Japanese and many other fans all over the world. Probably the closest personality at the time to a god on Earth.

    Have always been publicity attention seeking cunts. Old squeaky voice thicko recently paid a dodgy lawyer more money to get out of a traffic violation that the cost of the fine itself, just to get some cheap publicity.

    The tattooed cunt will endorse any product he make money on. Not fussy, just get me the fucking money. Happy to trade on past achievements.

    Squeaky voiced thicko’s ego will not permit him the thought of being insignificant, which is frankly how most people see him nowadays.

    Fancied his hand at acting. Cunt.

    As for his pouting stick insect, she has more talent in her little finger than the rest of her body put together. One fifth of a pile of stinking talentless shit otherwise known as the Spice Girls.

    The Beckhams and the Spice Girls. Yesterday’s news. Move on.

  2. I can’t stand that cunt Beckham and his cunt wife. Although I can’t really blame the kids because it will be the fault of the parents if they end up having the same sort of entitlement – aside maybe from Brooklyn they’re not old enough or mature enough to truly think for themselves independent of their parents’ influence.

  3. I comfort myself with the thought that the children may well take the Peaches Geldof route to avoid the shame of being borne a Beckham.

  4. I’ve no interest in anything “thick or thin” do, say or promote.

    Chavs with dough….

    Fuck off….

  5. When he lived in Besses O’ The Barn he was an OK lad… About as sharp as a sack of wet mice but not a cunt or a flash bastard…. Then the Spice Mutts came to Old Trafford (‘Who let the dogs out?’ sang the Stretford End) and Beckham (who was never one for classy birds, even before he met Yoko Spice) settled for the ugliest and most useless one out of them (even the Scouse one is better looking than Yoko these days)… Fergie said at the time she would ruin him… But – overrated football skills aside – there wasn’t much to ruin… Whereas the likes OF Best, Cruyff, Cantona, Beckenbauer etc all had some sort of substance about them, Beckham was – to put it politely – a fucking imbecile…. I say he wasn’t a cunt in his pre-Yoko days, but there was definitely a cunt in the making, with such a biddable and stupid twat put into the wrong hands… And lo it came to pass… He is, of course, now a copper bottomed cunt alongside his horrendous wife and idiot offspring… Bastards…

    • “A fucking imbecile”- as you say you are being far too polite on the cunt Norman.

      A flash, self indulgent show off with visions on a knighthood.

      I suppose anyone with the amount of money he and his talentless wife have accrued will of course be disliked but feel he could have done far more to help himself and to deflect criticism.

      He has had his time, why not just fuck off and enjoy himself without having to continually try and get his name in the papers. Or their fucking kids.

      Nobody cares anymore about either of them, and they should try and come to terms with that.

    • An empty taxi pulled up, and the Beckhams got out.

      I often wonder if the cunt-shopkeeper (father of Jacob) in Emmerdale is based on Duhvid. It’s just the attention to twattishness, stupidity and football.

  6. I can’t recall the magazine, but some music publication interviewed Victoria Beckhham circa 2000/2001, Sometime after she had Brooklyn. The fairly savage interview was composed of questions from fans and one of them, believing that her kid was given his pretentious name after the place of where he was conceived, ask this beaut:

    “If Brooklyn Beckham had been conceived in Stockport, would you given him the name ‘shithole’”?

    In the same interview, she was asked about being a freeloader (in the context of David’s fame), to which she replied “what does freeloader mean?”

    Thick vapid cunts who are now thankfully on the wane as far as public popularity is concerned.

  7. You need look no further than the 1998 world cup game versus Argentina to see what a pea brained cunt this fucker is.

    • Agreed… Flicked his foot out like a three year old that can’t have any more smarties… If it was a one on one fight Diego Simeone would have minced the little fucker…. But, like you say, Thicko Beckham did all Simeone’s work for him and got himself sent off, the daft cunt…

  8. As a non football fan I’ve always regarded Beckunt as insignificant. And as a music lover I’ve always adjudged his offensive wife to be likewise.

    Not one of their sprog has ever crossed my path until this moment. Hopefully they will never do so again.

  9. David is in the dressing room at Old Trafford and Fergie says to Rio “we’re going to give you a cortisone jab.”
    David says, “if he’s getting a car I fucking want one too.”

    What has David got in common with Forrero Rocher?
    They both come in posh boxes.

    • David Beckham walks into a sperm donor bank. “I’d like to donate some sperm” he says to the receptionist.
      “Certainly Sir” replies the receptionist, “have you donated before?”
      “Yes” replies Beckham “you should have my details on your computer.”
      “Oh yes, I’ve found your details” says the receptionist “but I see you’re going to need help. Shall I call Posh Spice for you?”
      “Why do I need help to donate sperm?” asks Beckham. The receptionist replies “Well, it says on your record that you’re a useless wanker…”

  10. As my sister commented only last week, ‘If she hadn’t married Beckham, she would be fuck all right now’.

    Methinks she has a point.

    Designer? More like swanning in and telling her minions to make the sleeves longer and take the skirt up a half inch, then fucking off to ‘lady with lunch’ with Fat Elton and his ‘husband’, David Cuntish.

    That would take a full 5 minutes once she finished forcing down half a carrot.

  11. Have posted this a couple of times before, still find it amusing.

    David Beckham goes shopping, and sees something interesting in the
    kitchen department of a large department store.
    “What’s that?” he asks. “A Thermos flask,” replies the assistant.
    “What does it do?” asks Becks. The assistant tells him it keeps hot
    things hot and cold things cold. Really impressed, Beckham buys one and takes it along to his next training session.
    “Here, boys, look at this,” Beckham says proudly. “It’s a Thermos
    The lads are impressed.
    “What does it do?” they ask.
    “It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold,”says David.
    “And what have you got in it?” asks Roy Keane.
    “Two cups of coffee and a choc ice,” replies David.

  12. David comes home one day and finds Posh in bed with some bloke. He goes to a drawer, pulls out a gun and holds it to his temple. Posh says “no David…. we can work this out.”
    He says “ shut up bitch, you’re next.”

  13. Can’t sing, can’t dance and for some reason i think she thinks she looks ‘alluring’ with that continual pout and never smiling. No love you just look a silly miserable cow. Please fuck off and stay fucked off, you’ve enough cash now surely.

  14. Their ‘star’ is starting to dim thankfully but their shitty offspring are ready to step in. Brooklyn is already a published photographer while still a teenager, reviews ranging from ‘terrible’ to suggested alternative for loo paper and also a sometime model having perfected David’s ‘not all my dogs are barking’ vacant gawk.

    • Perhaps Brooklyn could be the official photographer for The Maybot’s moment of death, when she is finally executed for treason.

  15. Yesterday’s news, both of them. Totally fucking irrelevant to the rest of humanity. What I can’t understand is why the fuck don’t they just go and live in some quiet backwater and enjoy the good things in life. If I had the kind of money they’ve made I’d go and live in the South Island of New Zealand where there’s no peacefuls, aspiring architects or in your face wimmin libtards. There’s just sheep and a few Kiwis who are generally OK kinds of people. I’d have my Guinness airfreighted in and eat Haddock and chips once a week. Oh and I’d get my shotgun licence in case any press or tv wankers came near my property. What the fuck is wrong with these people? They’ve made their pile so shut up, fuck off and spend it. Cunts.

    • They’re narcissists. They don’t exist outside the pages of HELLO! and TV Choice…..

  16. As thick a cunt as he is, and as vile a piece of talentless,skeletal, pouting shit she is, they’ve sold brand Beckham like a good,’un,. Unfortunately the world seems to have fallen for it! We are all well and truly fucked !!!!!

  17. What’s the difference between the spice girls and Manchester United? The spice girls have only got four cunts in their starting lineup !

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