Have only just realised that I would like to nominate the stupid sport of tennis. This is after accidentally switching on to the French Open Roland Garros.
Two guys each standing on their respective base lines and each making a stupid loud grunting noise every time they hit the sodding ball. Incredibly tedious, boring and fucking irritating. Shut up for fucks sake, especially you Nadal. Funny looking Spanish cunt.
Hate the muscly and unfeminine Williams sisters, on this point why the fuck do the women demand equal prize money when they only play the best of three sets compared to the men’s five best of five sets? Potentially 60% of the effort so 60^ of the men’s prize money? Particularly hate the smug Swiss cunt Federer who by the way earns about £60m every year.
Hate the “Ohh I say” and strawberries and cream at £10 a pop bollocks, silly dress code, stupid women’s outfits, the stupid hats and compulsory sunglasses, twattish commentators and the general elitist element of the sport.
I even hate the stupid scoring system used. 15 to 30 to 40, then deuce? Arseholes.
Finals day the camera will be just as much on the celebrities (or royal fucking spongers watching in the crowd) as it will be on the cunts playing, and especially on the wife/girlfriend every few minutes or so for her predictable reactions.
Far to say that apart from the occasional nice bit of totty playing in a very short skirt I hate pretty much everything about the stupid poncy game and the cunts that play it, wouldn’t bother going even if you paid me.
Filled with dread with the thought of Wimbledon fortnight coming up soon, perhaps I will take the opportunity to commit harakiri.
Nominated by Willie Stroker
Good cunting, Willie.
Only moderately interesting when characters like McEnroe, Borg and Nastase ruled the roost. Beard growing fodder nowadays.
The grunting you mention is particularly irritating. Many of them sound like Joey Deacon on cocaine.
Is Cliff Richard due to sing again?
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Joey Deacon? Now I know your age bracket!
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Knocking on the door of 48, old chap.
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Spring chicken!
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It goes a fuck of a lot faster the older you get. Probably a blessing in your final months…
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so am I, in less than 4 weeks, what a cunt, nearly 50……where the fuck did it all go?
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55 here and a bigger cunt than ive ever been.
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OFF TOPIC
Suck my dick Khunt and his bimp Trump balloon.
WHAT AN UTTER 100% NUCLEAR GRADE PLATINUM RATED SCUM CUNT.
FUCK OFF YOU UTTER COCK WOMBLE.
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It plays right into the hands of the likes of May and Khunt who both really don’t want a US trade deal, but want to keep us in the EU. They have the power to stop this ‘peaceful protest’.
I don’t recall a balloon depicting Macron as a cheese eating surrender monkey flying over No.10 during his recent visit or a giant inflatable Merkel depicted as a brown shirt.
Our Government are clueless cunts with all the emotional maturity of a sixth form. Cunts to all men.
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They’ll stop at nothing to run this country down… no doubt expecting to deliver us back to the 4th Reich, tail between our legs Prodigal Son like.
Fuck that. Suggest we join the U.S. instead.
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I would gladly become part of the USA now
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If given the choice between remaining part of EU or becoming US state would opt for the US.
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I read that as ‘brown shit’ at first, well either will do.
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Totally agree SOK
Utterly childish and pathetic!!
Fuck Khan …….
Excellent post ws…..
thank god for the World Cup I haven’t seen a second of Wimbledon this year and the men’s final is running alongside the World Cup final ( brilliant)….
saw rafael nadal of TV WTF is going on with his face?? Looks like something from Madame Tussaud’s ! Freak…….
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We’ve edited your comment –
1. If you want to nominate use the nominations page and write it up properly
2. You can’t tell a bloke to fuck off back to Pakistan because
a. it’s racist although we might have allowed it if…….
b. Khan wasn’t born in Tooting!
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Tooting isn’t Pakistan?
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No that’s Whitechapel 🙂
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HIS DAD WAS A BUS DRIVER, YOU KNOW!
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In the interests of good old English fair play, there should be a balloon of Mohammed up there too, in a suicide vest… knob up underage indigenous white girl perhaps… that at least would be more appropriate. After all, the Londonistan shithole is not of Trump’s creation.
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British fair play.
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What annoys me about that pompous motherfucker is that this is exactly the sort of stunt Ken Livingstone would have pulled and Mr. Kunt would then have been all over the BBC with Ali Camp-bell-end condemning it. He is not only an oily heap of shit but an oily hypocritical shit. Innit.
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Agreed Mr Stroker, the worst is when you find the what you thought you had recorded didnt, due to Penis Williams the gorilla dragging the game out for an extra ten mins, so not only don’t you get your program you get Butch and butcher to turn you off sex for a while…… testosterone testing required here I think for the two cunts….
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I reckon all you need to do is take a look at their balls.
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The Good Ship Venus and Serena should have come from Russia – where the men are men… and so are the women.
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i don’t know, some matches are great and some of the ladies are handsome. I don’t include the uppity ‘don’t you know who we are’ Williams sisters who can often be seen skulking and sulking around the court when the opposition have had temerity to play better than them. One’s like a fucking Chieftain Tank and the other a praying mantis, not to mention the fucking mother. I’ll be glad to see the back of this traveling circus when it finally dawns on them that it’s game set and fucking match.
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There’s a lot of sexual harassment in professional tennis, particularly for wimminz.
For example French tennis player Maxime Hamou, banned from the French Open for repeatedly trying to kiss a female tv reporter. Fucking disgraceful!
But let’s not mention that he’s a peaceful ok?
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For the life of me I don’t understand why people can watch such a boring game that’s about as exciting as watching the old computer tennis . The players have no personality what so ever except John McEnroe perhaps. Someone once said to me , what if you were stuck in a lift with Andy Murray listening to cold play.
Fuck Tennis.
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No Wimbledon for me this year, as my preferred girl (and miraculously “straight”) is not playing, due to an injury.
Thomaaaaaas’ cook and its sibling can fuck off.
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Something I would like to share with you all. I can’t wait for my Thai bride to arrive in the UK. She has an amazing sense of humour. I asked her to send me a nude pic and she only went and photoshopped a massive dick between her legs haha what a girl she is lol
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Errrrm, what’s the best way I can put this to you? 😳
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Can’t be done with poncy tennis; the only good bits are the upskirt shots of some tasty young wench who won’t last long because she’s seeded 5000 and isn’t full of steroids and built like a T-1000
Other than that, tennis is a pile of wank for elitist wankers, corporate wankers and twats on the BBC waxing lyrical about some fucking forehand volley! What they really need is a forehand volley in the face along with a lob to the bollocks – that’ll shut the fuckers up!
New balls, cunts!
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Well…
I actually enjoy a decent tennis match. I used to be a member of a tennis club that cost me the princely sum of £35 quid a year and that included balls and the use of a racquet if required.
It can be elitist in some circles but that’s the same argument that can be made about golf (and often is) when the reality is that that’s just an often used misconception by folk who never have, nor ever will plat the game.
The scoring system is silly but makes sense when you know what they used originally when the game was first played – an old clock face.
The long hand representing one player/team the short hand the other. First point = 15 minutes, 2nd 30 minutes and the 3rd 40 minutes. The reason being that in the case of a deuce – 40 all – when either side scored the next point they would be move to 45 minutes to show an “advantage” over their opponent.
Well that’s all the bollocks out of the way, and so I present to you Dominika Cibulkova, the Slovakian player who knocked out Johanna Konta yesterday…
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/7b/6e/c8/7b6ec8967292166e4d1f778b9b47bcce.jpg
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I suddenly like (women’s) tennis. Weird that…
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It amazes me that no one says anything about Serena despite the fact she has bigger shoulders than some of the men. Are people actually that stupid to believe she is natural? Remember that game where she spazzed out because she was ‘feeling ill’ and literally couldn’t serve properly?
That alone makes everyone involved, including the spectators, gullible and culpable cunts.
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Tennis is the Novochok of choice.
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Dangerous place to be this year is Wimbledon.
I heard Novichok was seen on a practice court….
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I wonder whose cock is bigger out of Serena Williams or Caster Semenya?
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Have a threesome with them and find out. Bareback, naturally.
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I don’t like the thought of being the meat in a manwich! Besides, I’m going to wet the baby’s head with Tom Daley and Dustin this weekend. They’ve promised to give me a jolly good Lubbocking, whatever that is – sounds like fun though!
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Ooh, I love a nice bukkake me… room for any more?
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They’re probably using Dale Winton as a lilo in their pool.
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She could straighten out cold iron with that pelvis slamming down.
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Wimbledon.
The rich at play.
Fucking hate it with a passion.
And if the singles winners are each pocketing something in the order of £2m each for a couple of weeks “work” why do they need to rely on unpaid volunteers?
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It’s the crowd that get me. Mainly coffin-dodging old bags wittering on about Murray Mount or Henman Hill while waving some silly little flag that they bought for the Coronation and now get out to wave at minor Royals who come to open a new shithouse in their sheltered accommodation complex,or, more usefully, cruise past in a hearse. The senile old Cunts whinge like fuck when some Pikey charges them £100 grand to clean the gutters,but think nothing of paying £20 for 5 strawberries….too much pension money,that’s their trouble.
Then there’s the “Chelsea Set” types who have no interest in the tennis and are only there because it’s part of the “season”.Utter Cunts. A couple of glasses of warm champagne,a few lines,and they’re braying their chinless-wonder shite at each other “Oh, Wuuppppert, is this Henly or Royal Ascot? I’m too fucking inbred to know the difference”. Hopefully they’ll have an overdose and their bloated corpses will be found still gassing their inane drivel 3 hours after death.
Then there’s the stupid tart who takes her screaming brat. The brat spends the day screaming and ruining everyone else’s day,but Mummy doesn’t care. Her little Prince must be accommodated no matter how it affects other people.
Then there’s the “Security”, fat old wankers who may be capable of herding a gaggle of OAPs about,but wouldn’t last 20 seconds if faced with my steel toe-cap arrowing towards their nether-regions.
I went one year and hid in the dirty laundry basket in the Ladies dressing-room. Martina Hingus or Ana Ivanovich’s sweaty briefs were my intended target,but a faceful of Serena’s (not so) smalls cured me forever of that particular predilection. My knicker-sniffing days are ruined. Even my extensive collection of female rugby players knickers has lost it’s, admittedly questionable, charms.
Fuck them.
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Fucking Henman, eh? “Tiger” Tim.
Cunt.
He always summed up the Brits’ sporting achievements. Trying (to a moderate level) and failing pathetically. Every fucking year.
Back in the days when Viz was funny, they had a brilliant cover: “We’re backing Tiger Tim…all the way to the quarter finals”!
https://goo.gl/images/bHzD3K
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Talking of Viz, there is a superb cunting of Sting in the latest issue – Sting of the Dump. And for once it is funny.
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I know a female rugby player. Gorgeous piece of totty in her time. Ended up damaging her knees, silly bunt.
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Did her knees get carpet-burnt while she was being made airtight by a bunch of predatory lesbians wearing strap-ons?
Be sure to ask next time you see her. She may have a video of the incident.
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Will do – she certainly won’t be offended by the question!
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TI_cmAVLICc
A few of the cunts that attend Wimbledon.
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Stephen Lawrence killer to get damages
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-44737851
There is something seriously wrong with the justice system in this country.
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“why the fuck do the women demand equal prize money ”
In order to broaden its appeal and just for a laugh this cuntish sport should have the men and womens champs at Wimbledon play against each other in a winner takes all Grand Final.The Cunts want equal pay let the cunts earn it.
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Some years ago a woman golfer was complaining to the interviewer that she thought it unfair she and other women were not allowed to enter the mens events.
Interviewer replied by saying to her that in the interests of fairness men should then be allowed to enter the women’s events.
Typically no fucking response.
Stupid bitch.
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Re: grunting noises during play. Have you tried closing your eyes during a women’s tennis match and having a wank?
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Yep I have Allen. Certainly does the job. Especially when the female umpire shouts “juice” at the end of a long grunting rally.
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Tennis is such a cunty game to watch much funnier playing it yourself or a videogame version of it It was alot of fun in gta 5 can’t be arsed to watch the full thing usually just check out the highlights
Its a very elite sport to watch cunts who go to wimbledon or other known events pay up to £2000-4000 a seat its ridiculously priced not for poor people like you or me
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The current state of Sheffield https://i.redd.it/pv8tzi4706811.png
They elected some nog with a sombrero and bling around his neck as their major? Democracy was a mistake cunters
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Looking at that picture I know exactly what he’s saying: “YOU AIN’T GETTIN’ ME ON NO PLANE FOOL!!!”
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He’s a Somali. Sheffield was the only Yorkshire city I had any time for. Fucked up now. I expect he will help the Roma scum who infest parts of the city. In the interests of diversity.
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Fuck me, I didn’t realise that Somali pirates operated on the UK canal system.
Like they say, forewarned is forearmed!
I bet the cunt claims he knows Sir (USA tax dodger) Mo Farrah as a personal friend!
Fucking “bite the hand that feeds you” cunt!
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Grand Slam is what one does (in the RN) after a particularly heavy drinking debauch……….piss, shit and puke in your bed.
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