Ed Sheeran tickets (who wants them anyway?)

Ed Sheeran. Not because he is a ginger minger or even a ginger moaner and not because all his songs are repetitive and sound much the same. No, I nominate this little guitar strumming mumbler because he has stitched up ten thousand of his fans by invalidating their tickets. Now I thought it is up to the individual how much they are willing to pay for a ticket to watch him perform, but no little Ed thinks differently, so if you bought a ticket through a different agency than Ed’s official one you cannot watch him play even though your ticket is genuine. That is unless you buy another ticket at the gig and of course, many of these ten thousand did not have the funds to do that and as such were these fans were left very upset

If he is worried about other ticket sites selling his tickets then all you have to do is limit the amount you can buy to four tickets at a time, a simple piece of software will easily achieve this and stop blocks of tickets being sold. Do Not Punish your fans who have made you by their loyalty super rich.

I can only think that you are trying to out cunt Bono and that takes some doing but it appears you have managed it.

Nominated by iamnot


37 thoughts on “Ed Sheeran tickets (who wants them anyway?)

  1. The sort of people who like Ed Sheeran don’t like actual music anyway. He’s almost as bad as Coldplay. “Music” for dreary, dull people who paint the town beige. I’m glad they’ve been ripped off and hope it might spur them to investigate non-mainstream music. All it takes is a tiny step off the path of greyness and there are literally thousands of wonderful artists from all genres waiting to be discovered.

    • Modern pop music is the bland leading the bland. Not worth bothering with.

        • Pop is for little girls. Paid for by derpy mothers. Financed by hen pecked fathers. Dreamt up by greedy and perverted executives who are essentially selling sex to minors.

          Anyone over the age of 10, and has testicles, has no excuse for listening to any pop unless skipping through stations to escape the dire debate on LBC.

      • Modern pop musak is driven by twiitermong and FaceCunt likes.

        I’m certain it’s a fucking ruse by plastic pop Machiavellians like Cowell who get some faux popular teen to post: “Oh my God! Have you heard the new song by XYZ!?! Oh my God you must watch that video. Can’t wait for the album!”

        And the digital fucking sheep will do the rest!

        Et Voila! The world is now gifted with vacuous cunts like Sheeran and Adull.

        No cunt actually likes the droning shit they peddle they just think it’s “cool” and “in” not to be left behind in digital sheepdom!

        Just like bastard Cold Play: Yellow, Clocks, etc., preachy, whiny tat!

        “Oh but we’re cool with the planet dude!”

        9 Brit and 7 Grammy awards later…and they’re still shite!

  2. Talentless cunt – but take solace in the fact that he`s being sued (again) for (quite literally and unashamedly) stealing someone else’s song.
    On another note (no pun intended) is it me, or is he a what `old man Steptoe` would have looked like in his youth? Perhaps you could paste side-by-side images of them for comparison.

  3. Being the scathing and insensitive bastard that I am, I don’t feel particularly sorry for the cunts that didn’t get to see their beloved ginger ninja strum his instrument. There’s worse things that can happen in life. However, they’ve been done over by the chubby ginger prick who is fucking minted. Just another cunt that has become self-entitled and up up his own arse through a bit of fame.

    • Let them listen to “After Cease To Exist”. Failing that they can eat fork as far as I’m concerned.

      Btw, Bagpuss creator Peter Firmin has just snuffed it. Anyone have him in their dead pool?

      • I’m sure Shaun aka the grim reaper has picked him; picked him off more like.

  4. I once “upskirted” Geri Halliwell. Got a lovely Polaroid of a dribbling ginger cunt. I also recently took a photo of Ed Sherran, the similarity was remarkable,but Geri’s fanny-farts probably sound better.

    • Geri’s Spice Girls barnet was a dye job, Dickie… The collar didn’t match the cuffs and all that….

  5. This ginger cunt is the music equivalent if the colour beige and has a face I could never tire of hacking at with an icepick.

  6. I’ll bet that he’s also fucked Adele. The filthy,shameless bastard.

    • Ah, so whole body condoms are not a myth after all!

      Can you imagine the gusset odour from that glorified, shouty, fish-wife in this weather!

      Plenty of batter…ewwwwww!

  7. The humiliation of getting fucked over by ed cuntface sheercunt OUGHT to bring people to their senses, to the realisation that they have been soft as fuck. That they have been willingly lowering themselves below the level of the cumstains on ed’s pants.
    If that’s not a practical demonstration of social dominance then I don’t know what is.
    And then there’s the “muzak” (I even have to use inverted commas on that term it is so loosely applied). Deliberately listening to unkept tramps with no social skills whinge on and strum a guitar is no better than listening to a heroin addicted scrounging busker in town on a thursday morning. It is not, NOT a musical choice.
    Thanks to our cunt and dec saturday night culture as endorsed by cuntface cowell and the mighty knuckledragger aka danny dyer, our bookless society seem to think homeless lookalikes a la sheercunt are the living embodiment of musical genius. FFS.
    Then again, maybe I’m being too harsh. What can you expect when people want to sue their parents for being born white or simply cut their dick off?
    I will relent a little then. 70 lashes in the market square to the sound of classical composers ought to teach every one of these mindless followers of fashion the error of their ways.
    Despite their moaning about it (they moan all the time anyway) I bet they will give more of their cash away at the first opportunity the dull cunts, and buy another ticket. So desperate are they to be dominated.
    I suppose listening to ed sheercunt must be a bit like getting a good figging (thanks TtCE).
    Dammit, that’s it isn’t it? This is now a cuntry of sado-masochistic pervert slaves? Desperate to be shat on all day long, and then put it on farcebook.
    Cunts cunts cunts cunts cunts cunts cunts cunts cunts…..

    • Dead right, cuntflap… Because the music scene is a sea of liquid shit any cunt who claims to write their own songs is proclaimed a ‘genius’ by the social media mongs and the music press…. That talentless slag Jessie J was referred to as ‘Songwriter to the stars’… Doing crap songs for the likes of Chris ‘womanbeater’ Brown’ and Miley Slagbag Cyrus and suddenly Jessie Cunt is Carole King?! Bollocks! Jack White is another one… This cunt screeches out shite that Yoko Ono would be ashamed of, yet he’s seen as this ‘primal blues artist’ while his mute wife/sister/mong hits a drum like a three year old with one arm…. And the Ginger Gremlin is the latest one… Alll cunts with less talent than a dog turd…

  8. What a nasty, morally bankrupt little cretin. Just like most people in the entertainment industry.

  9. hype over substance. i would need to be paid to actually go and watch Sheeran and it would need to be a lot.

  10. I’d rather spend the evening washing Harvey Price’s incontinence pants than see Sheeran.

    ‘Galway Girl’ is up there with Mull of Kintyre, I am Sailing and Come on Eileen for cuntyest tune ever.

    Soap dodging folk singer who must have been a saint in a previous life….

  11. By the way, apparently he’s being sued by Marvin Gaye’s relatives for ripping off one of his songs (can’t remember which one now) after having previously been sued for plagiarising another song back in 2014. Read into that what you will.

    • The Ginger Gremlin is the new Noel Gallagher… An ugly looking igor type cunt who nicks other peoples’ work…. Gallagher pilfered off loads of artists (Slade, Marc Bolan, Stevie Wonder, George Harrison, John Lennon etc) and he even stole a song off one of the Rutles and also off a coke commercial and an old Schools & Colleges programme… I dare say this Marvin thing is the tip of the iceberg with the Ginger Gargoyle… God knows how many bits the little twat has ‘interpreted’ ‘appropriated’ or just fucking nicked… Little fucker…

      • Thing is with Sheeran is is he’s so smug, arrogant and thick… Even the Happy Mondays weren’t daft or out of it enough to release ‘Lazyitis (One Armed Boxer)’ without crediting Lennon & McCartney, Sly Stone, and David Essex on the record… Because the song featured bits off all of them… But at least Shaun Ryder admitted it and didn’t try to pass it off as his own…


  12. I’ve never understood the appeal of the Ginger Gremlin… It just shows the stupidity of people today and how they will settle for the medicore and downright crap… Sheeran puts out whining insipid shite… His songs are like a fourth rate Leo Sayer and I dare say that the Ginger Gargoyle fancies himself as a Gilbert O’ Sullivan type… When in actual fact the Ginger Cunt could never come near writing something like ‘Nothing Rhymed’ ‘We Will’ or ‘Alone Again (Naturally)’…. As for his ‘singing’? I have seen thousands of better singers in clubs, pubs, and even busking on the streets…. And the cunts in the media and social media mongs who are giving his tuneless crap ‘classic’ status? Which songwriter worth their salt would come up with the line ‘You between my arms… Bareffoot on the grarse’? Trying to rhyme arms with grass by elongating the second word? A six year old could do better… And have you ever heard any fucker ever say ‘Between my arms’?! In my arms, sure, but between? The little ginger minge is a hack and doesn’t even have a grasp of the English language…. And that ‘Galway Girl’ is a piece of musical excrement on a par with Black Lace’s ‘Agadoo’, Jessie Cunt’s ‘Price Tag’ and other pissed up chav music shite…. Oh, and did I say I think that the Ginger Gremlin Gargoyle Gimp Gnome is a complete and utter cunt? Stupid music for stupid people…

    • Barefoot in the grarse
      Between my arse…

      might’ve been more credible. Or not.

  13. To be fair to Sheeran, when I first heard him on a side stage at Glastonbury, I thought the boy had talent and gave him credit for getting out on the road and learning his craft the hard way.

    His first album was pretty good but he fell into the trap of cashing in on the success of the first one by rushing out a second one when he weren’t ready, but still not too bad. Then in fairly quick succession came the third album. Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear! What the fuck is this?? Sounds like the songs that were considered as the B-sides for singles that were never released but were rejected because they weren’t good enough.

    My advise to Ed? Take a year or two out and write some considered unhurried songs that were as good as your first outing. You’ve made the money and have nothing to lose or prove so what’s the rush? – or are you afraid that your 5 minutes of fame will evaporate? If you really do have talent and something to offer then it won’t – but FFS not another album as mediocre as your last one!

    And FFS dump this + x ÷ shit unless you’re going to call the next one – and attract all the appropriate piss taking that goes with it.

    • The mathematical signs are probably yet another ‘I’ll show you’ thing about his school days… Sheeran seems to have a big ants nest up his arse about that sort of thing… He said his popularity now makes him ‘the coolest kid in the school’ (when he isn’t at school any more, and he obviously wasn’t that)… And him being number one in the charts was like ‘finally coming first in the sports school race’ (when, again, he obviously didn’t)… He has said both these things a few times about his success now and the daft add, subtract, divide stuff is probably a dig at an old maths teacher he used to have… What a soft cunt….

  14. As much as I’d like to weigh in on how shite Sheeran is, I can honestly say I’ve never knowingly heard any of his output. I wouldn’t want to because I make certain assumptions about him and his ‘music’. His look, hair, sole instrument being an acoustic guitar and above all, the absolute fuck wits who fawn over him. That alone tells me all I need to know. Plus it is my understanding that he operates in the ‘pop’ genre which I pretty much avoid due to its bland, contrived, talentless and mass produced and dumbed down approach. I wouldn’t like it so I’m not going to subject my hearing to something which is most likely, very very far away from what I’d enjoy.

    I’m sure many cunters will have seen this video by the very excellent PJW:


    Say it all really.

  15. A few on here mentioned the travesty which is Coldplay. Their plagiarism is simply jaw dropping. I present to you, the very excellent top 10 single I Die:You Die by Gary Numan, released in August 1980:


    Contrast that if you will to Clocks, released by Coldplay almost 23 years later in March 2003:


    Notice anything similar erm….I mean the same? I remain absolutely astounded that Numan didn’t sue. He should have.

  16. I fecking hate music and musicians nearly as self absorbed as fecking actors, self important creatives dribbled over and puffed up by impressional fecking idiots. I swear that the day a cure for cancer is discovered it will be relegated to inside pages of the paper because one of our wonderful creatives has made front page news cos he’s had a haircut and all the fans are lol(ling) on faeces book

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