Women in Fiat 500s

Women driving Fiat 500s are complete cunts.

We have one living next door to us – she thinks she is fucking Sterling Moss, bollocksing up our private road as fast as she can go, gravel spewing everywhere. One day she will run some poor cunt over, that’s for sure. Another cunting Doris in a Rosso Red model almost took me out today – again driving too fucking fast near a junction with very restricted ability.

What is it with these soppy tarts when they climb behind the wheel of one of these ‘cute’ little Iti jelly moulds? They think they are driving some exotic, mini Ferrari. Next one that incurs my wrath will end up with said mini Fiat shoved right up their front bottom!

Nominated by Paul Maskinback

76 thoughts on “Women in Fiat 500s

  1. Grenfell Grenfell racism Grenfell police oppression Grenfell Grenfell Grenfell hate crime racism Grenfell community community racism Grenfell Grenfell hate crime racism Grenfell community compo Grenfell institutional racism Grenfell racism Grenfell Grenfell Grenfell Grenfell Grenfell fucking Grenfell…………

    Sorry, just warming up for Grenfell day.

      • Which, in turn, is like reading the back of a cereal packet.
        A minute’s silence at 12. I don’t want any of you cunts fucking about!

        • I was in Ikea Brent Cross when the silence was announced for Borough Market. Whiteys went into silent contemplation. The blambos and sand people (the main demographic in that Ikea) went on talking about curtains and cushions. Yes, I was in the soft furnishings department, but it sez it all really….

        • Actually it’s 72 seconds silence. One for each death.

          Followed by 352 seconds. One for each each fake compo claim

          • It’ll be a minute’s Hendrix ‘Star Spangled Banner’ live at Woodstock turned up to 11 blasting out into the street, for me!

          • Funny as fuck Pedantic – Blambos are still being sniffed out who were nowhere fucking near when the Barbie was on. Strange that nobody knows who the fuck lived in most of the toast houses considering they were such a close knit community – Clammy Lammy was in full swing at some blambo church service – the “silent” march they undertake every week is mainly your typical ginger dreadlocked 60 year old “students” with an array of wimmin pushing sprogs around in prams attending to give justice for the Grenfell blambos – looking and acting strangely like the Greenham common cunts. How in the name of fuck do they manage to attend all day festivals? Affluent middle class mortgage paid types or never worked a day since they dropped their first sprog types? A mix of both I wager. TV has been wall to wall Grenfell grotto whingefest. A couple with 2 sprogs and a senile Father who originally signed for a Grenfell pad 30ish years ago are living in a 5* hotel and they are having to wait until November before their new house in Kensington is ready – due to the fact that the Father isn’t of sound mind to sign for the place which I say is fair game – if you are away with the fairies you should be in a summersault factory – not waiting for a new pad in Kensington. Its a 3 bed mind you – so the council have to cave in and allow them the old hereditary council house for life bollocks that every other council stopped years ago. Cunt came from some shithole in the desert, still speaks no English and hasn’t done a stroke since he landed. Meanwhile – our veterans are kipping on the streets – their brains addled by drink / drug / PTSD / mental problems but we can find Kensington pads for goat bothering blambos. Boils my fucking piss.

    • Just add a tune and you’ll have out new national anthem if comrade compo and the abbopotomous take over… though you did forget to mention far right extremism.
      Maybe the second verse could be about that.
      They can call it ode to st cox…

      • Works well with the German anthem

        Grenfell Grenfell uber alles
        Grenfell Grenfell gren-en-fell

    • Oh did you know its the Grenfell anniversary today just in case you didn’t know.

      • Actually, it happened at 9pm last night, ironically the date was the 13th. Unlucky for some.

        So in typical snowflake style,they got the date wrong but never mind. Near enough.

        Call me a cynical pedantic cunt, but I hope the 72 doves they release shit all over the green cladding because shit happens in life and if it doesn’t effect me or mine then I simply don’t care.

        Especially don’t care about the greedy cunts claiming compo who weren’t even there. Lock them up and throw away the key.

        Sick of hearing about Grenfell.

        • Of course, James Shithead O’Brien is virtue signalling on amphetamine fuelled steroids right now!

          So far he’s managed to “keep it friendly”, creaming his boxer shorts respectfully only every 30 seconds or so.

          “The entire programme today will be dedicated to remembering that morning a year ago when we all awoke to a sense of grim disbelief.”

          Yes, I switched off 10 minutes ago.

          • Oh man I can’t even imagine the shitfest of cuntitude extruding from every orifice on that cunt today.

            I think I’d die if I tried to listen to his virtue signalling at the mo.

            Has he given a lecture to white people yet about how we need to respect gimmegrants coz without them our country wouldn’t function?
            And he has to make up some hypothetical white man (usually old and northern) that just can’t understand the world as as he does coz said white man is evil and O’Brien is an enlightened, educated, intellectual, elite, genius from the basion of sanity that is Chiswick…..

            I’m getting fucked off and I haven’t even listened to the cunt.

          • Yes – he managed all the above in the first 3 minutes and 57 seconds!

            Strangely though, he didn’t mention his favourite subject, blue passports and fish once, before I shutted him the fuck up.

    • In other news, political prisoner Tommy Robinson transferred to class A prison with high Muslim population for execution.

      Move along, nothing to see here.

        • Yes according to his manager /cameraman /official spokesman Caolan Robertson who was being interviewed by Alex Jones on info wars Tommy was transferred at short notice to a prison in the Midlands and onto the main wing in gen pop. 71%Muslim population who were all banging on the walls and his cell door threatening to kill him as soon as he arrived. I guess state enforced execution is illegal so they’re doing it by proxy instead.

          • That’s it then. He’s probably not going to survive that. The cunts have effectively sent him to his death.

    • That famous Star Wars scene would be perfect to describe today. Only changed to ‘something, something, something… Grenfell’ l

    • Pray silence please, let’s say a year’s worth, from all high-profile remoaners and defenders of mass immigration, for the tragic etc victims of Grenfell. Because that’s what happens when you import cheap labour from countries which care naught for fire safety to do the dirty work in a city with limited and very expensive housing.

      Especially when your idea of investment in housing is to apply lipstick to that high-rise pig, in the form of panels of what is essentially solidified petrol. A week for every victim, please, you welcoming and inclusive cunts. Though public flagellation would be more appropriate.

    • Grenfell Grenfell Grenfell Grenfell Grenfell Grenfell……….if only I gave a fuck……….Grenfell Grenfell Grenfell etc

      • The memory of the Grenfell tragedy would have brought a tear to my eye, if I hadn’t been devastated by the rumours that the Beckham’s marriage may be over.

      • I’m currently monitoring the news with the sound turned off. I think they’re singing “Oh Happy Day”.

    • The mood has brightened this afternoon near Grenfell Towers as locals left their English classes. Word of the day was ‘ compensation ‘

    • compo…

      but no mention of smeggy Cleggy – he must have an opinion on Toksvig Towers ??!

    • I live very close to where they have rehomed a bunch of the illegal gimmegrant filth that plopped out of Grenfell.

      Since that time we have enjoyed numerous unannounced visits into our front garden while the sub Saharan delights scope out the best way to break into the house. (big mistake M’Tebe, there’s a Rottweiler behind the front door)

      The abundance of graffiti that has sprung up all over the place is obviously a selling point that I am sure estate agents will be keen to point out when we sell up, along with the hightened possibility of being mugged in the winter months when returning home from work in the dark.

      Looking on the bright side, I don’t live in such close proximity to the Grenfell scum that I get old mattresses, packing boxes and other assorted crap dumped on my doorstep like the mega rich fuckers who live in the 375 High St. Kensington development. I actually have photographic evidence of this, while two little Mohammeds were kicking a football up against their windows. I bet they are really glad they spent millions on an apartment, just to have a bunch of third world criminal shitbags move in next door.

      Why the Grenfell vermin have not been rounded up and deported is still a fucking mystery to me.
      instead they’re mooching off the taxpayer and living a lifestyle that the majority of working Brits could never hope to afford. Complete with huge cash handouts, translators, therapists and leftard fuckwits falling all over themselves to virtue signal their way into the hearts and minds of the same people who will be stabbing them for their Rolex /iphone in the very near future.

      Oh, and I note that my council tax has just gone up to help that vile Labour cunt Emma Dent Coad fulfil her promise of emptying the council coffers and the residents of RBKC’s bank accounts in order to appease the peaceful and Dindu cunts who shouldn’t even be here in the first place.

      Fuck you Grenfell.

      Fuck you Emma Dent Coad.

      And fuck anyone stupid enough to trot out the usual virtue signalling bullshit about helping ‘these poor people’.

      They’re not poor, they’re not people and they’re not welcome in RBKC.


  2. I think the fiat 500 is going for a cutesy look, the psychological implication being to blur the drivers’ memory that they are driving a gay machine of death.
    So, fiat are cunts (they claim this model inspires fashion) and, the women who attracted to less personal responsibility are cunts.
    Even the name of the paint job is a cunt. Rosso red indeed.
    I’d also like to say that the name of every modern car is a cunt. What the fuck is “juke” meant to mean?

      • Kia soon to be available in three-wheel version: the Kia-Ora. Complete with a plastic sheet, bog roll and cloth cap to put on back seat.

        Any car of your choice is available in 3-wheel (or probably no-wheel) version if you have pikeys nearby.

  3. Still better than a cheating Nazi scum diesel though. Mercedes been caught at it now. Fuck Germany and especially fuck German cars.
    And I’d get them long legs right over my shoulders as I give her a right song too.

  4. My brothers 2nd ex had a fiat 500. Not sure how she got in it the fat cow. Also not sure how she paid for it as I bailed them out twice!.

    My fat activist metoo femanazi neice has blocked me from her twitter feed. Lefties don’t like it up em.

    • She can’t do that! That’s homophobia! I think you need to remind her of her snowflake responsibilities, the bitch.

      • Contact twatter and get her “no-platformed”, exorcised, whatever these mongs do in such circumstances…

      • Everything I hate:

        Pro Palestine
        Fat activist
        Eco warrior

  5. It’s not necessarily the car. The Highway Code needs re-writing: “when about to make a maneouvre, put down cuntphone, check your mirrors, signal then maneouvre” or “whilst proceeding, ensure that you frequently glance up from your Facefuck page or Twatter account”.

    Uber drivers are, of course, exempt from reading this publication.

    • Sgt. Major, Sir !!

      In check your mirrors, you omitted “make-up”. Applicable to both sexes these days, I fear.

      For the benefit of Uber drivers, “withdraw from goat, and stow animal safely in the back.”

  6. Ugly looking car; mostly driven by ugly trolls. One of those being a right hag of a computing teacher back in me school days. Her Fiat death machine got the old sugar in the petrol tank treatment. She was nicer to everyone after that.

    • Citroen 2CVs and the model slightly up from it (ok, a bit old-days now) needed cunting.

  7. Just on my way to grenfell Anniversary , got a rucksack full of candles and a wheelbarrow of mawkish sentiment……
    Guess I’m gonna fit right in…….

  8. I rather like them. A friend of mine had one with a sunroof,and I used to stand on the seat pretending that I was Adolf Hitler giving a speech at Neuremberg, all salutes and hand gestures,a la that Father Ted episode.
    My fun was only curtailed when I did my party-piece driving past a squad of T.A who were putting on some display on the local show day. The sight of me bouncing across the showfield, several times around the beertent, and then slowly past the TA display,all the while giving furious Seig Heils proved too much for the show organizers and Abby,myself and our makeshift Panzerkampfwagen were ordered off the showfield.

    Fuck them

    • Insensitive. Doncha know the mention of H^tl€r is verboten nowadays?

    • Fair play mr Fiddler, I think that properly undermines fiat’s intention of the car inspiring fashion, being iconic and being bold. To quote their sales pitch:
      “The iconic soft top Fiat 500C is more surprising, more connected and bolder than ever.”

  9. The worst drivers on the road are in light-to-mid blue cars, regardless of make. I don’t know why this is. They are followed closely by BMW and Merc drivers, regardless of colour. One of each category has tried to kill me this week, all by pulling out of minor road junctions without looking.

    For what it’s worth. I have no personal complaint against Fiat 500s, except that they look like warts. But Little Noddy seems to have had a hand in the design of everything since 1990, so that’s not exceptional.

    • A major blockbuster is on its way.

      Bendadick McCunyface will play Andy Pandy and Little Weed.
      “Dame” Emma Thompson as Looby Loo. Teddy will be taken by a diverse Peruvian…
      All together now…Here we go Looby Loo, here we go Looby light, here we go Looby Loo, all on a Sarturday night.
      I kid you not…I had a distant memory of the lyrics, thought “Saturday night” came into it somewhere, but couldn[‘t believe my eyes when I checked it out…
      What was she on ? Polish-strength gripe water ?? Saturday night…defo hint of “activities”
      Bet Teddy was a dirty old groper.

  10. The SNP have made a cunt of themselves again. Those SNP MPs are *not* there to represent the Scottish Parliament, they are there to represent the people who elected them to west minster and look after their interests. Do your fucking jobs you fucking cunts. They should be sacked.

  11. It’s ‘cute’ and modern so they won’t feel embarrassed driving it, even when they drive like a special needs child who has eaten an entire box of frosties and shoved a crayon up their nose. Very popular amongst college girls who enjoy the endless bankroll of daddy.

    Much preferred the Fiat Panda. It had the structural integrity of a baked bean can and somehow managed to incorporate 90 degree angles into its form. The ‘turbo bass’ computer speakers and automatic reverse tape deck were its (only) revolutionary features.

    • 4WD version was a bit of a hoot.
      Mostly sold in warmer drier countries so didn’t rot away as fast…

    • Ex and I had a few Pandas. Seats were quite easy to adjust.
      Every fortnight, kneel on them, and pull the back to a more vertical position…
      Never had any tech probs though, unlike a seriously “Friday” Renault 5. It spent more time down at the garage, until the sevice manager decided to escape. We decided to try somewhere more local to sell it- somewhere that didn’t know its history. We got a reasonable price.
      My mother said it was up on the ramp for months, every time she walked past.
      And the service manager turned out to be the bloke from the original garage…

  12. Anyone know what’s going on over at the Guido Fawkes website? Used to be hundreds of comments per article and now there’s barely 10, and sometimes comments are off.

    • Yeah, it’s almost like people don’t like the fact that they sold out to the Establishment

  13. Poor old Albert Einstein is taking a beating for some ‘racist’ views made in a travel diary while visiting Asia and the Middle East almost 100 years ago. “industrious , filthy , obtuse people” the Chinese and “Levantines of every shade…as if spewed from hell” said after docking in Egypt.

    A visionary of 21st century Britain I say.

    • Einstein’s work should be consigned to the dustbin along with the ‘Bell Curve’ which dared to use science and stats to look at IQ. (interestingly Asians came out on top but Blacks came bottom, as they are the world over, so it was suppressed and howled down) I wonder why no one has looked into intellectual differences that the genetic cross pollination from Neanderthals into humans that left Africa may have had?
      In fact, only pre-determined scientific theories should be allowed that fit the neo-liberal agenda.

      • Einstein was the forerunner to Hawking and the other popularized mathematicians posing as discoverers of truth. They all boil my piss quite frankly.

  14. Apparently 80,s band power station are doing a set at grenfell ?
    surly not?
    According to reports it’s being sponsored by Electrolux? Say what!
    Having recently returned from holiday with a nice tan I’m fancying my chances of coping a few quid down there…..

  15. Fuck me, can’t these cunts find enough raaay-sists knocking about, they have to go dragging up corpses to give a kicking?
    Fucking wankers.

  16. I’m bloke who drives a Fiat 500, or more specifically a 595 Abarth.

    140mph, 48mpg, Beats surround sound system with subwoofer (Classic FM sounds superb) Bluetooth handsfree system, full media integration, takes off like a scalded cat and handles like a go kart.

    I had a fully loaded Fiat 500 before that and its only weak point was that it couldn’t hold its own on the motorway…. Particularly after some dozy Polish cunt in an Artic twatted it halfway across the M25 while watching porn on his fucking laptop.

    The cunt.

  17. The 500 always reminds me of a spaz chariot. I certainly agree as I’ve witnessed it myself, they’re normally driven by these overtanned Kayleigh or Chardonnay types with earrings bigger than a Maasai’s lip, not even looking at the road they’re sat on, but rather checking out their glittercunt status on Facewank, Twatter or some other carton of social cunt. Another motoring atrocity from years back, was the Metro. Mother of sugarcoated Christ that was a shit car. The bodywork was about as rust-free as the foundations of a Victorian pier. My dad had one many years ago. He paid the scrap dealer a tenner just to get shot of it!

  18. I prefer my missus’ wheels, I’ll never forget the day not long after we started dating when she rolled up on a Triumph in tight black leathers.

Comments are closed.