We all know the joys of snowflake cunts pissing around atop plastic broomsticks on 5-a-side pitch pretending to play the imaginary game Quidditch from Harry Potter (football/hockey mixture with a child’s toy stuck between your legs), Pod Racing from Star Wars (basically a dodgem car drag race on a straight track – no bumping!) and Tron’s “Deadly Discs” (two cunts throwing Frisbees at one another, wearing full body padding, helmets and goggles – just in case they melt) but now – as covered by our very own Snowflake Central liberati spewing machine the ABBC – we have “Mermaiding”, and yes it is exactly what you would imagine!
Sad cunts wear a pull on mermaid’s tail and then swim by flapping their legs up and down. That’s it.
The objective: to swim like a mermaid. So who wins? The fastest cunt? The cunt who swims the furthest underwater? The cunt who swims the longest distance?
Well the objective of who wins (as with all snowflake endeavours) wasn’t so much to find the best (because “best” and “brightest” are baaaad words in modern society) but to be inclusive and will probably be based on the very subjective notion who most embraces/resembles the motion of a mermaid in full flow.
Hmmm, so what archive/library footage of mermaids will they be referring to when making these assessments? Splash? A Disney cartoon?
No doubt there will be points for artistic impression too – which would explain why their outfits were as garish as any Rio carnival costume rather than a perfunctory black or blue colour.
No surprises then that the cunts in flake central want to make it an Olympic sport (to go alongside pole dancing no doubt – yes also to be an Olympic “Sport”).
Well let me tell you now – snowflake cunts – there’s already an Olympic swimming discipline where you legs are together and you flap them up and down, it’s called the butterfly stroke and you use your arms as well and it’s all about who is the fastest, i.e., the BEST over a given distance because that’s all any (normal) fucker cares about in a real sport!
So instead of inventing/recreating imaginary sports why not just try and get better – or at least participate in –
real sports. Oh but that’s right, real sports have a definable objective and that’s baaaad because it identifies the best (and “best” is baaaad in an “inclusive” flake society isn’t it)!
Triggered? Then please feel free to paddle off to any fucking safe space of your choosing. The shallow end is 👉 way!
Fucking snowflake cunts!
Nominated by Rebel without a Cunt!