Len Goodman (3)

I nominate Len Goodman for a cunting.

I know he’s been done twice before, however this time he’s outdone himself with “partners in rhyme”. Something I have had the misfortune to be exposed to and I don’t even own a fucking telly.
If you don’t know what this is I suggest you get on youtube and find out. As an aside, hold a stopwatch and see how it takes for your piss to boil.
I only just made it to a bathroom.
This tv offering is utter nonsense designed to make people feel good about themselves for allowing their IQ to barely creep over 5.
Len the cunt roughly helps fucktards through this process with all the charm of a condom filled with oven cleaner.
Cunt cunt cunt cunt.
It hurts my brain just to recall this mind numbing drivel.
Smarmy orange motherfucker pretending he’s young and full of life. Fuck off you prick. Will someone please break out the chloroform and cart him off to a big hole in the ground somewhere.
Jesus christ, how is he still on tv? This truly is a crime against humanity. A crime against intelligence, and education; and decency.
Given his theatrical background why hasn’t he been locked up anyway? He’s statistically likely to be on file somewhere over at yewtree.
Put ISIS on hold, this guy needs yanking out of the public eye. Immediately.

Nominated by Cuntflap.

Jesus on a Tricycle, that Len Goodman rhyming wank is so utterly cringeworthy that I literally cannot look at the screen due to the extreme contortion of my face in sheer embarassment for the old cunt.

How did it fucking come to this? This old fucking relic from the neolithic era of TV needed to be put out to pasture along with fucking Forsyth.

For too fucking long, Len Goodman has been putting the ‘turd’ into Saturday.

Nominated by The Empire Cunts Back.

40 thoughts on “Len Goodman (3)

  1. What a cunt, and going by his surname he’s probably got something to do with that old shitty electronics brand Goodmans. So he can fuck off, been stealing a living from the TV licence paying twats for too long. The cunts probably got mansion in Essex and gets his pearly mates round singing “My old man”. Fuck off you cunt.

  2. Typical lowest common denominator television = find a “celebrity” and hurriedly shoehorn them into any old ill-conceived format without any thought whatsoever. The other show Goodman did was shite too (the one where he took other so-called “celebrities” back to places where they used to go on holiday as kids and found a contrived excuse to dance with them), but Partners In Rhyme takes the fucking biscuit.

    On a related note, cunters may be infuriated to learn that after initially considering Miranda Hart as the new host, the BBC has now decided to revive The Generation Game as a vehicle for Mel and Sue…

      • Tbh I couldn’t give a flying fuck who they draft in to do Generation game!
        How fuckin desperate are the BBC getting by exhuming this decomposing relic?
        If this is a successful exercise other other TV companies may get the idea to raid the graveyards of long forgotten shows? Bullseye with Danny dyer? Or maybe Sale of the century with Micheal McIntyre?
        Hopefully by the BBC,s act of self harm in letting Mel and she thru the door the generation game will be scuttled like the Graf Spee before heading out to do damage of the high seas of prime time British TV…….

    • Mel and Sue, what a pair of cunts. I’ll be honest I’ve always wanted to give the non lesbian one a rooting, but that doesn’t excuse them from being a pair of unfunny cunts. So many untalented cunts sucking licence payers money via the BBC. Surely the BBC has to be gone in the next few years. By the BBC’s logic if you have a device capable of receiving live TV you need s licence? So as most cunts have a smartphone these days that’ll be everyone. What a load of leeches who won’t fuck off and accept that times are/have changed and most people in 5 years will get all their TV online. I’m off to set up my Amazon firestick today, loaded up with Kodi and the other one. I know naffink abaaaaaht it.

      • License is required if you recieve live tv or watch bbc programmes on catch up.
        You can have a full sky package and insist that you only watch catch up and never watch any bbc and they’d have to prove you wrong. They’d do their best though, as they are convinced their claim is a criminal matter when in fact it is a civil one.
        As for the bbc, the radio has been felching cheggars corpse all morning. I tell you, I’m gonna be in a clocktower by noon if they keep this up.

          • Two points :

            1.It’s a broadcast receiving license not a TV license, so you still need one even if you only have Sky and watch catch up. It’s still a broadcast

            2. Buy a listings mag and take a deco. There’s fuck all on Sky worth watching either. Ditto Netflix.

          • Likewise Fred. Remember watching the phone hacking scandal questioning of Rupert and his son. Crooked the pair of them.

  3. Yeah, top cunting here, that “Partners in Rhyme” is definitely one of the most brain dead, sheeple pleasing abortions ever to appear on television…

    At least he fucked off from Strictly and we now have Shirley, who I am not ashamed to say, I would pump sensless !!

  4. Excellent cunting fellas …..
    “ smarmy orange mother pretending he’s young and full of life ” would have been a far better name for this pile of utter shite..
    This offering manages to make deal or no deal or pointless look like mastermind! And that’s not easy..
    This could only appeal to people who’s IQ you could get on the roll of a dice, and why did they think wrinkly old twinkle toed one trick pony Goodman could carrry it off??
    Len its not a 10!!
    Goodman should immediately give saga a call and book a never ending holiday…….
    Entertainment this is not!!

  5. I haven’t got the bottle to even look at this low grade offering from the bottom shelf of god awful bbc entertainment shows. Goodman is one of those old cunts that by complete chance has got through to his age in rather good health. Not being content with that he then has to preach to people that he has the special secret to keeping youthful by the way he’s lived his life and if we just listen to him we’ll all live to be 100. That’s why you’re an old CUNT.

  6. Never seen Strictly or this rhyming bollocks but I did see one episode of the holiday cuntery referred to above.
    It featured that massive birdwatching bore Bill Oddie.
    It might be because Oddie is such an overwhelming cunt but I barely noticed this Goodman fuckwit. So I don’t know the cunt but the programme was shit and he looks like a remoaner so he can go and fuck himself the wanker.

  7. I’ve derided Pointless, Bargain Hunt and Come Dine With Me in the past, but they are Panorama-esque compared with this rhyme smeg. The Telegraph gave the first show one star, which they very rarely do, so I watched the second out of interest. All I can say is that it scores so highly on the cuntometer that it disproves Sieberg-Witten theory. Some cunts are being paid money to put on this show, which is a bigger crime than holocaust denial. It is THE worst thing I’ve ever seen.

  8. Chirpy, wrinkly, cockney old has-been bell end.

    I can imagine him dressed in his pearly king ensemble, doing an on-the-spot jig whilst barking “knees up muvva braaawnn” at any cunt daft enough to listen to him.

    Oh, did I mention that he is a cunt?

  9. Off topic but has anyone noticed that Carry On films have been absent from our screens on ages? Perhaps the Wankstein furor has caused TV execs ringpieces to twitch like rabbit’s noses.

    • PM, I think they have gone the same way as It Ain’t Half Hot Mum(racism), Some Mothers do ave em (health & safety) and Till Death Do Us Part (where do you start?). Some snowflake cunt TV exec is having a meltdown at the very thought.

      • The only time you see those shows now is on a poxy ‘weren’t it dreadful in the past’ type of show on channel four. The format used to be lazy nostalgia, but it’s far more likely to be populated by crap new comedic types, too young to remember, sneering at the clips with that new PC superiority the cunts come pre programmed with. Nish Kumar mortified at Spike Milligan browned up for curry and chips, or Joe Lycett groaning at Windsor Davies shouting ‘pooftas’. Revisionism is for cunts.

  10. Ha ha! Poor old James o ‘Briern, he must be sick as a parrot this morning.Nick Ferrari has been named ‘ Journalist of the Year’. The only thing more upsetting for him would have been if somehow Nigel Farage had won !

  11. I couldn’t agree more that Len Goodman is a cunt however I have a great idea for Saturday night viewing where Len Goodman could for the first time in his life be a useful cunt as he could present my new TV show ‘The Great British Muff Off’.

    The concept is really simple, the contestants would compete a number of challenges in the buff in a sort of ‘it’s a Knockout’ style for no other reason other than for my sexual gratification.

    Points would be awarded for successfully completing said tasks and Len Cuntman, because he’s cunt would judge who’s got the bushiest thicket and he could even lay a few ryhmes and dance a little jig with the winner.

    I’ve got a massive list of contestants in my head but I just keep coming back to Shirley Bassey as being the outright series winner.

    • I saw one episode of the holiday thingy. He was in a coach with some fossil so famous I had no idea who he was, and they drove to Norfolk. That was it, they drove to Norfolk in a coach. Unmissable.

    • Great idea, can I throw in a steamroller please? As the end credits roll up the screen, behind the words can be seen the wriggling screaming len cuntman pissing himself with pain as the streamroller works its way up from the feet at a rate of 3mm/second….

  12. I can tell you that the old fucker won’t be doing another series of Rhyme. All the shows were recorded this summer, the first batch was shown about 7 on Saturdays but it was so piss poor it was dropped, and they have just shoved out the last four earlier in the day, just to save wasting money.

    No doubt he is a cunt – one of the old queens of the dancing world and like the dwarf lezzie Susan Calman, the BBC just give them cheap crap to make them little stars on daytime and early evening TV. I suppose the money has bought him a truss and a Stannah stair lift

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