The Human Race

I want to nominate the human race for a cunting, or ninety five per cent of them anyway, there are a few nice genuine people in existence but they’re a tiny minority.

Humans are the most revolting worthless species ever to develop on this planet. Animals are far superior and know how to co-exist, they’re content as long as they’ve got a full stomach and they have a lot more sense.

Take something like a wildebeest, it gets born on the African plains and it has about an hour to get up and follow its mother otherwise it’s dead meat. Compare that with teenagers who run straight out of the school gates into the traffic. Fifteen years on the planet and they haven’t got the brains of a gnat. Treat an animal right and it will love you, treat a person right and they’ll likely kick you up the backside. The law of nature used to be the survival of the fittest. That doesn’t apply to humans any more. The ones with intelligence have careers and the ones who don’t stay on council estates, living on benefits that others provide and breeding more fucking idiots who grow up and do the same.

The human race should be exterminated like parasites before they develop space travel and get the chance to infect other planets. They’re a motley collection of lying, cheating, thoughtless, arrogant, thieving, two-faced, selfish, offensive, bloody fucking arseholes.

Ah. I feel better now.

Nominated by Allan.

Human beings are mostly as thick as pig shit. They harbour beliefs in supernatural beings, churn kids out by the billions without a thought how they are going to be supported and find things to fight about that even a three year old wouldn’t bother about. I’d be surprised if this pathetic species is still here in 500 years. Probably wouldn’t be able to reproduce anyway after the pissy fairy wusses have had every fuckers cocks n minges removed so you have to go to a shit n piss removal centre. Gender free of course. Cunts.

Nominated by Kendo Nag

113 thoughts on “The Human Race

  1. The first cunting was outstanding, couldn’t have put it better myself…..although not all animals are saints – cats are sly cunts and cat owners are selfish cunts who let them shit in other people’s gardens. (this from a cat lover).

    • Advice please Lenny me old mucker – apart from holding them prisoner indoors or sealing them in plastic bags and chucking them into the nearest reservoir, how would you suggest cat owners disallow their recalcitrants shitting in other people’s gardens?

      • The two methods you mentioned are the only ones that are either extant and morally virtuous I’m afraid. The onus should not be on me to purchase a big, fuck-off dog or line my garden with tiger dung.

        • I’d a work mate once … not the full shilling … he had an issue once, for a very short while… when his neighbours, lazy cunts, would just open their house door and let their dog out to ‘walk it’s self’. Problem being, all it would do is come into his garden and have a shit there. After the second or third occasion and explaining politely to them this was not on .. on the next occasion, he scooped up the dog shit on a shovel, walked up their garden path and flicked it on to the middle of their living room window pane.
          Problem solved. It didn’t happen again, but he was unhinged enough to carry it off and the neighbours knew it. Fine if you can back it up.

  2. I’m a cunt. Given the slightest whiff of power I’d pol pot most of the planet. There wouldn’t be any thick breeder cunts in my council estates, they’d be down on the farms doing 18 hour shifts for their new trackie bottoms, in fact, anyone who failed the 11 plus would be mucking out pigs for the rest of their natural. I wouldn’t be too horrible though, each one would get a nice shiny 9ct gold sovereign ring for every 25 years service.

      • I was wondering if Hairy Wankstain had stuck anything up her.

        He seems to have pretty bad taste, looks as if he’d put his dick up an Austin Metro’s tailpipe.

        I wonder if lots of wimmin will be coming out to make atrocious claims against the most wonderful and holy Bill Clitworn.

  3. Today’s news and papers are rather sickening… Turkeyneck Paltrow and Slagelina Jolie all over the front pages: being portrayed as ‘victims’ of Harvey Weinstein…. Getting goosed by a movie mogul (if it happened!) does not make them ‘victims’… Scores of media cunts and social media mongs will be feeling sorry for these two obnoxious and round the track Hollywood publicity (and cock) suckers… But they don’t give a fuck when innocent girls are groomed and worse by gangs of ‘peaceful’ human filth I shitholes like Rochdale and Rotherham… This, I think, does say a lot about the human race these days….

    • Bang on the money Norm! A Hollywood cunt ‘abusing’ Hollywood cunts. Everyone’s a winner – what’s not to like?

    • The Cunts were queuing up to slag Trump off for a bit of innocent “Pussy Grabbing” while covering up and colluding in rape and long-term abuse. Typical biased, deluded, arty-farty Cunts.
      I hope the old hooknose did the lot of them up the shitter. It’s what they deserve.

      • I wonder if he’s got any videos. I’d have a little peek,just so that I too could be “shocked and outraged.”….None of Angelina post-op mind, that would be just too much.

          • It’ll be interesting to see if that Cunt Alec Baldwin ..who cannot mock ‘The Donald’ enough .. will parody Weinstein. The Cunt wouldn’t dare.
            What’s good for the goose … if you pardon the pun.

    • That’s as bad a Taylor swifts mum in court!! Apparently she was crying her eyes out when the charges against her daughters (attacker) were read out?? Sexual battery and a whole other list of nonsense!!, for what in effect was an alleged arse grope which happened in a studio with others present, non of whom I believe saw anything?? ” boo fucking hoo some man touched my daughters skeletol arse” WTF!!
      Get a grip love…..

      • Right about Swift’s arse, Quislings,… There’s fuck all to cop hold of… If Swift wore a fur coat she’d look like a pipe cleaner… All these Hollywood celebrisluts suddenly acting like little angels, when most of them (and certainly the likes of Slagelina and Cokebag Delevigne) have had more directors cock than Alan Partridge had had directors bitter… And I’m not just talking about Weinstein either…

        And all these media cunts calling the Weinstein scandal ‘Hollywood’s darkest hour’… They obviously haven’t heard of Marlon Brando being a male prossie, Clark Gable killing someone with his car and a Hollywood ‘underling’ taking the rap, or Sinatra pimping out the likes of Marilyn Monroe to his mob pals… Hollywood has been a sleazy and corrupt craphole almost since the day it began…..

  4. If the human race is so fucking clever..If the human race is so fucking intelligent. How come we are so overpopulated with cunts, fuckwits, tranny’s ,cretins, liberals, socialists,arseholes and Piers Morgan?

    • Ah, that’s simple Simplearsehole – it’s cos the stupid – or farmyard animals as the wife describes them as – will always outbreed the intelligent, and the human race has reached a critical tipping point, the stupid outbreeding the sensible by at least 10 to 1.

      This is known in scientific circles as De-Evolution.

      I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, from arsehole to breakfast time – CULLING THE CUNTS IS THE ONLY OPTION NOW! The indiscriminate scum breed like obese bluebottles, and should be treated as such.

      I favour using weapons of mass destruction.

      • De-evolution?
        There’s no such thing.
        No matter what direction something is moving in its evolution. Going backwards, still evolution.
        This is not a pop at you, as you said it’s what scientists say.

        • Are you questioning the veracity of my source material birdman? I have a doctorate in psychotic enlightenment (D.O.P.E), so I obviously know my onions. And besides, Devo sang about it all back in the mid ’70s – “Are we not men? We are Devo!” – so it must be true.

          Not taking a pop at you either birdman. But tell me, are you a bird or a man? You’re ain’t that cunt who thinks he’s a parrot, is you? Sorry, didn’t mean to get personal, but I have very strong feelings about this issue.

          • Don’t really know what to make of your reply, but have noticed you being sensitive to some replies that came your way before, so i was trying not to upset you.
            Anyway, its a bullshite phrase that makes no sense.

          • I am a sensitive cunt, it’s true. But never vindictive. And no way you could upset me birdman, your heart is in the right place and that’s all that matters at the end of the day.

  5. It’s time to reset the clock.
    Humans are nearing the end of this cycle of existence. I’ve long believed that there have been advanced civilizations before ours,and believe that there will be civilizations after ours. The world itself senses when we are about to go too far and flushes us like the parasites that we truly are.
    Personally I couldn’t care less if there is some cataclysmic event which sets everything back to Year Zero. I have no family that I give a damn about,and certainly don’t care sufficiently about myself to give two shits if it all ended tomorrow. The Human race is not developing in a constructive way,it is hurtling towards a self-made extermination. Overpopulation, pollution,religious extremism and just plain the fact that we are Cunts will be the end of us.
    Animals belong on this World. We don’t…We spoil and destroy wherever we go. Talk about shitting in your own nest? That’s us,not the animals. The Human Race is determined to wipe itself out,and I have no doubt that within a generation it will have achieved it’s aim.
    Good. Fuck them.

    Nice Cunting Allan and Kendo,

    • Agree with that 99.99% Dick. Except would kindly point out that humans are in fact zoologically classified as animals. Albeit animals that wouldn’t know their arseholes from a cunt in the ground.

  6. Go anywhere in the world and you can always guarantee that humans will fuck it all up. Everything is in balance with animals and their predators (other animals) until humans come along and build a shopping mall and start digging for oil, gold and diamonds.
    Humankind’s problem is greed and power that is the root of all the problems we cause and it won’t stop. Humans are obsessed with killing each other and develop more and more clever weapons to achieve it.
    Although saying that I went shooting in Prague and fired an Uzi, AK 47 and many more the other day and it was fun.
    Humans what a pile of cunt.

    • “Fired an Uzi,AK47 and many more”

      Are you, as a Black and White Cunt, aware of something that a casual racist, such as myself,should be worried about ?
      Time to circle the wagons and man the barricades. There’ll be no white women left unmolested by the time I’m done anyhow,so no good thinking that you’ll get your hands on them.

      • Being a bit of a dirty cunt I don’t discriminate, black white, blonde, brunette I don’t mind. Whatever ladies I meet who are up for some usually get it, fuck it I’d even shag a peaceful ladies… Might be interesting.
        Now I’ve had my training I’ll go on the rampage conquering town and city alike. All the women will be mine.

      • Thought I’d get some training in Dick Fiddler, you never know when the call for the final takeover will be given.

        • I’ll be ready. I’ve long fancied myself as the Michael Caine character in Zulu. So don’t be suprised to see me defending Fiddler Towers armed with nothing but a fake posh accent and wooden performance.

          • I’ll send the darkie divisions in and if you defeat the wave and wave of attacks by throwing fried chicken to distract them and you win, I’ll pretend I didn’t know them and I’ll be singing the national anthem.

      • @Quislings, I usually got the targets after a couple of shots. It takes a while to get used to the Gun. Great day out.

  7. Project Fear pumping wildly – Hammond today warning less money for NHS and planes unable to take off in event of No Deal…

    • Come to think about it, maybe not such bad things after all.

      Good for the environment – and should have no problem finding £350million a week in NHS savings if they cut out inessential services like comedy breast enlargements, tattoo removals, IVF, etc.

      Was going to include Gender Reassignment Surgery in that list, but Mrs Baker has her heart set on me having a chop n’ cunt, so I can get me State Pension a full 5 years ahead of current schedule.

      • Some non binary tranny fucktard has been given leave to appeal to the high court (or higher, did nit read it all) because he/she/it is demanding a non-binary passport. I say FUCK OFF YOUR RETARD.

        • I just read about that. The more freedom you give to people, the more they take the piss with it. Not so long ago I watched a programme about a girl who identified her gender based on whether she felt like a woman or a man depending on how she felt that particular day. Back in the good old days of a more oppressive society this high maintenance fuck would have had to make a choice and live with it. Nowadays we have to indulge the ridiculous whims of tossers like that. Makes me want to boil my head in chip fat.

          • I had a hell of a craving for cheese about an hour ago.
            Housemate very kindly “lent” me a block of Royal Canadian extra mature cheddar. Had trouble trying not to eat the whole block.
            I obviously need a DangerMouse passport…

        • Non Binary passport if you want … but as long as they’ve got their own queue at the airport. I wouldn’t want a Cunt in front of me with a passport with that shit on it when I’m in a hurry to be somewhere.

  8. Brilliant cunting this. And the worst thing is, as political correctness strengthens its death grip on society, even more people will be able to indulge their warped tendencies until eventually there will be an awareness movement for cross dressing, gender bending, pink haired, bisexual hybrids of Asian, white Caucasian, african American and possibly Martian origins with a fetish for every form of sexual deviance in existence. Not to mention the usual rabble of rapists, stalkers, murderers, paedophiles, religious nutcases, power hungry sodomisees, work shy scrotes and remaining backwards folk, it’s not looking great. Kim Jong Un is a blessing in disguise.

  9. Would it be possible to recommend for another monumental cunting for PIKEYS, these pieces of shit have turned up in Walsal and parked 50 vehicles in a field, then said pikeys have allowed their pack of probable stolen dogs loose and an 80 year old woman has been attacked by said pikey mutts and the the thieving, lying, cheating, benfit claiming, tax dodging, lepracaun scum have has the brass neck to say the woman was trespassing on their land….W.T.F is wrong with these cunts,i reckon some ethnic clensing is due or send these fuckers back to the emerald isle with a pair of water wings…..kiss the blarney stone pikey cunts, one day all your mistreated animals are going to turn on you and I cant wait…..

      • Ja ja. Und who had ze perfect zolution for zer pikey untermensch? Zey tarmacked meine bunker zen ve gave ze degenerate scum a spezial zhower ja! Und ve paid zem nothink!

    • Apparently community action can work. Here are two apparently true examples:
      Pikeys rock up. Small village locals gather in local pub. Within one hour, ALL the locals pay a visit to the pikeys and calmy explain that they will return in one more hour to set fire to all the caravans even if they have children in them.
      One hour later, no pikeys.
      Second example, a business needed to clear the site. A local emissary was employed and no warning given. Just rolled small burning hay bales toward the caravans.
      One hour later, no pikeys.
      As far as I know, no-one got arrested in either example. To be fair, this seems to be one of those things the cops are happy to let go unless some dull cunt goes and puts something on record.

      • When my wife was young she saw a line of council bin wagons driving across the common land the pikeys had parked on and watched as they were gradually pushed off to dissappear into the distance.
        Fuck me the council now would build them a permanent pitch complete with amenities block for a few millions, and the cunts would strip it bare shit on the floor of the showers and never use it again.

    • yeh that ‘survey’ that was published yesterday included the fact that pikeys and Romas had the highest rate of kids suspended from school. it was deemed ‘ discrimination ‘ lol. nothing to do with the fuckin way their scum parents drag them up then?

  10. Ja ja ja. Zair you Kuntz go again. Who had ze perfect zolution to ze human race? Who got on nicely zorting out ze scum from ze Meister race? Ach! All zoes flaxen haired goddesses exzerzising in zair Jack Boots und zair parachute zilk panties zat Zer Fuhrer loved to sniff…..Ach zo! Ein minute while Ich wipes away a tear.
    Ich vas vell on ze way to kleanzing ze entire planet zen you Kuntz fuck Zer Fuhrer. Barbecued in Berlin. Kuntz!

  11. Chris Eubank Jr, tweeted this after his dad removed two stunning ring girls from photo bombing his interview, ” to all the ring girls. Do not photo bomb me as my dad has a very particular set of skills. He will look for you, he will find you and he will pie you”

    Lily Allen’s response ” they are doing their job. Your dad went bankrupt and gave you away to a stranger in Vegas, the only photo bomber here is him. #respectwomen.”

    Eubank Jr replied: ” it’s called banter Lily. You’re well known for abusing drugs and alcohol so maybe focus on respecting yourself first before worrying about others.”

    She cries for refugees, abandoned refugees, poor refugees, people who lost things in a fire etc etc , yet poking fun at some cunt who went bankrupt is not off limits for her?

    Twisted little cunt.

  12. How the fuck can you even contemplate the end of humanity which would mean the end of such seers as J K Rowling, and how the universe would miss the great thoughts and advice of Gary Lineker.
    I have always hoped that space travel would come on leaps and bounds in my lifetime so that the knowledge and compassion of Lilly Allen and the acumen of that huge lovely man Richard Branson would spread throughout the planets. And not forgetting the high IQ of Prince Charles and his wonderful children and their splendid step mother Camila, we should rejoice in the fabulous development of our human race and all aspire to be just like Vince Cable and Tim Farron what wonderful role models.
    I am proud to be ruled by cunts and I know my place which is to have no say and be poor all my life at least I have the pleasure of watching all the rich cunts enjoying themselves at my expense.

      • I know a guy who shot himself in the head with a rifle.
        I was talking to him only yesterday.
        Yep, the cunt somehow survived and i frequently slag him off for failing at such a simple task.
        He doesn’t like me much.

        I’ll tell him about the “shotgun mouthwash” next time i see him.

        • Mate. I have actually seen the effect close up. ( I had to assist Police investigations as part of my job as it happened in our workplace ) They did ask me first if I was OK to provide identification of the poor bastard. Not a sight you easily forget. 12 gauge buckshot up through the roof of the mouth certainly ends dandruff.

      • A bloke that I did some work for shot himself. I like to think that the two events were connected. Happily I got my money before the Cunt weaseled his way out of his other business debts by topping himself.

        • I’ve been feeling quite depressed recently. My missus said I should find a new interest and has enrolled me in the bridge club.

          I jump off next Thursday…..

      • I can well believe the shotgun is the most effective, got the chance to shoot a real one lately and the thing is a lethal cunt of a gun.

        • I reckon the method with an absolute guarantee of success (unlike the shotgun and those shakey hands) is to hire a wood chipper and jump in it.

        • Know an old country cunt with a sawn orf. Bloody lethal. He blasts it into fox holes and the like. Have a brace orf Purdy’s meself. Have downed a coupla drones with ’em. Action as smooth as silk but if you don’t get your stance right they’ll rip your shoulder orf or set you skidding backwards on your arse.

          • Nitrogen is allegedly pd good, non-toxic, odourless &c. Just acts as a blanket, excluding oxygen.
            Loss of consciousness pretty quick (faster than watching a Royal Variety performance, allegedly), and that’s it.
            All done.
            Over.
            I was going to use it in Vienna, kept getting emails from gas suppliers (Austrians seem to have some sort of history here).
            It was actually from a big wine shop chain, like Oddbins used to be. Ideal stuff for keeping plonk fresh in the bottle. I never bought the gas, in the end, cos I talked myself out of it, and re the wine, I can easily empty a litre, so saving a bit of a bottle seems pointless…

          • Cheers for the tip Belinda, have bin on the lookout for an alternative to currently favoured option of valium 10s washed down by a litre or two of railroad gin – then off the Orwell Bridge at last moment of cuntiousness.

  13. I took a long time composing a post naming all the ways that DeAndre Harris is a cunt but it got lost google the antifa nigger thug and make you own mind up

  14. It is inevitable that the human race will self destruct. As technology advances at an ever faster pace it becomes available to cunts who have more sinister intentions to wreak havoc across the globe. So either some cloaked up allah loving cretin or some gold finger type will fuck us all over. And I’ll laugh like fuck when these cunts die and realise they’ve been had off and Allah’s nowhere to be fucking seen. Dumb asses!

  15. Out of the 7 billion people on the planet I am popular with such a tiny percentage it doesn’t register. I don’t like them they don’t like me. Being such a tiny minority I expect laws changed to suit me, free cash and all the good stuff tha tcomes with being an obnoxious minority

    Cunts

    • The problem is that of those 7 billion – through the joys of social meejah – 6,999,999,750 think they’re important and that the world needs to know about their last cup of tea, sandwich or menstrual cycle.

      The other 250 are the realists on this site!

  16. Lilly Allen I’m sure is an inbred pikey cunt, but I would love to aim a sniper cunting at a Cardiiff bus company called NAT buses and coaches,these cunts are the reason for half the traffic jams in Cardiff.
    Whenever I’m sat in 1 mile an hour traffic for 20 mins half the time there is a broken down NAT bus that’s caused it……
    Tonite crawling home from work behind a 25 car que,you all never guess a fuckinf NAT bus doing 7 mph in a fucking 40 zone for 3 fucking miles gearbox fault I suspect, so you would think the cunt driving would pull over and let the traffic pass but nnnnnnooooooooooooooo this cunt made my trip home take 20 mins longer than usual….
    So to NAT buses….buy some new buses you cunts or lay off the chimps that don’t do your maintenance and pay for some proper mechanics or else your buses should be called NOT likely to get you there customer they are cheap skate cunts……

  17. @Shaun of the Dead 69, i feel your pain. I remember my first one with no break and it was soul destroying. Fuckin’ bullshite bosses should get their acts together. I bet they had a break.

    My first two days working in Ireland, i missed the morning and afternoon breaks coz no cunt told me they existed.
    I was working in my own out there but there was other cunts doing their job around me and it took till the third day for some cunt to say “why don’t you take a tea break?”. No cunt told me , that’s why.
    Maybe they were getting a Brit back for all they jokes.

    I have a course tomorrow, and as its Gib, there’ll be plenty of breaks. Just hope i stay awake to see them.

  18. An emergency cunting is required for professional mutant and passport gender objector Christie Elan Cane.

    This Nosferatu doppelganger has secured the right to take on the government over the requirement for passport holders to disclose their gender. Apparently born as a woman, Cane had its female sexual characteristics removed and had the leftovers thrown to the dicky birds. I.e. no twig and berries fashioned from the meaty scraps.

    Cane, quite correctly, has ‘female’ on its birth certificate. Whatever cut ‘n shut work has taken place since, it is still female. This will never change. The only people who believe this is fluid or erasable is frankly in need of a strait jacket and a high dose of sedative.

    What superheats my piss is that all of us who hold passports don’t get a say over one oversensitive, mentally ill Michael Stipe lookalike, that is likely to get its way if right-on cock-decryer, Maria Miller has a hand in the proceedings.

    Fuck off Cane, you bald, emaciated little cuntwich. This bullshit propagated by the mentally ill really needs to stop before the likes of Cane are pushed off a very high cliff.

  19. What happens if any of these freaks visit a peaceful country? They barely tolerate women let alone rocking up at passport control in Saudi with a fucking X in you passport.

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