I have to cunt Greenpeace.
Greenpeace, in the shape of a young man I assume was (hopefully) a foreign student, knocked on my door the other evening looking for a monthly donation.
Not four pounds a month…
Not five pounds a month…
Nope, his recommendation was the “average” monthly donation, by direct debit naturally, of twenty pounds a month.
Twenty Quid? Fuck off! That’s my bike petrol fund…

I’m told Greenpeace own a fleet of Land Rovers by the way.

34 thoughts on “Greenpeace

  1. When the chuggers come a’knocking I ask them how much they get for signing me up. I’m told it’s the first ten months of your dd?

    They usually fuck off at that point…

  2. The trouble with the whole environmental/global warming issue is that we are expected to believe that politicians care about what the world will be like in 50/60 years time. Oh really? The problem is that experience tells us that these lying cunts are only interested in the next election and keeping their snouts deep in the trough. Combine this with the fact that their only answer is to slap taxes on environmentally damaging behaviour….I.e the rich can do it but the rest of us can fuck off. Nah, sorry I ain’t buying it. It’s a load of bollocks…stick it up your arse.

  3. These charities are taking the piss, these fucking knobheads who try to get you to sign up give you the cheesy grin as you approach them on the high street. You are already stressed having to navigate through the mass of cunts, rich housewives, poor cunts trying to find Poundland, tramps, Eastern European beggars who look at you like they are about to die unless you give them a pound, tourist cunts who get in the way, and old cunts going along at 1mph, you finally approach some usually middle class uni type cunt who tries to engage you with shit comment when you and they know they want MONEY. They can all fuck off, charities should only employ volunteers or cunts on benefits who work for charities to get their benefits not cunts getting paid and in the process deprive the charity of money. Don’t get me started on the cunt Director’s of these charities who are on £100,000+ a year.

  4. We need a cunt patrol, surely as the police have the community police officers we could have the cunt patrol division. Armed with 10 tasers per officer anyone who looks or acts like a cunt gets the taser. I’d need 1000 taser guns a day.

    • Leave off. The economy couldn’t stand the cost. I had to make a train journey last week , not long but they were five deep in that carriage, looking, sounding and acting like cunts.
      The 24carat tosser opposite me was talking on a phone you could have landed a jumbo jet on, bald all over except for his ponytail and shoes with Cuban heels. All the other standard cunts were studying him to get pointers on how to be a giant cunt.

  5. I’ve been invited to a fancy dress charity ball on Friday.

    This year’s theme is Jamaican hairstyles.

    I’m dreading it…..

  6. Biggest cunts on the climate change issue are the hypocritical celebs and MP’s. Leonardo DiCuntio bitches about carbon emissions then takes a private jet thousands of miles to collect an award on raising awareness about climate change. 5* bellend.

  7. Fuck my fucking old boots. I’ve just found out that that smarmy, slimy pro-EU, pro-Clinton, pro-Muzzie, pro-immigrant foul cunt James O’Shithead has been named Radio Broadcaster of the year by the British Press Guild, whoever the fuck they are. Cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt CUNT! I am fucking fuming. I fucking hate this fucking cunt with a passion. CUNT CUNT CUNT FUCKING CUNT! Why is the world so full of total cunts? They didn’t know what they were voting for, they were brainwashed by the Daily Mail, they were lied to. I want another fucking vote and I’m going to stamp my foot until I get one!

    • Good old James O’brien, what a cunt. The cunt cannot accept anyone disagreeing with his agenda. Everyday the cunt is still moaning about Brexit. What a piece of cunt.

    • The art of a great interview is to not say much, just steer the conversation in the direction you want it to go and let your “victim” hang himself with his own rope. James O’Shithead never shuts the fuck up, he asks a question and then shouts down the answer. And he gets a prize for it?

  8. Imagine trying to explain to some cunt 25 years ago that you could walk thru central London as fast as you could drive it in 2017 and the cunt would have thought he was listening to a Cunt!! Not only that but you would be hit with a daily charge for pleasure! , the whole green issue has been seized on by the righteous to levy a whole raft of stealth taxes on the general population, although we have a relatively low carbon footprint our political class have seen this as an ideal politically correct opportunity to grab our hard earned.
    With a population of 55 million in England and a land mass of a measly 132,000 km these issues will only continue to grow and the Cunts know that, so expect more of the same, all the time the biggest world polluters America and China go about their business…..
    On the taser front I think the government should run a trail, maybe the House of Lords?? Just a thought…..

    • Or you could have approached the same cunt in the Barking Road 25 years ago, told him that in 2017 he’d be standing in a street in Islamabad and he would have thought you were a double cunt.

      • My uncle used to live in those strange looking flats by the roundabout in barking, when he passed two years ago my brother and I went to his funeral, I hadn’t seen barking for a few years, what a fuckin shock!!

  9. The Olympics needs a cunting for having an Olympic Walking Race,
    We’ve all been there about to shit yourself and the toilet is 70 metres away, you can’t run as everyone will know your about to shit yourself and you can’t stroll as you might shit yourself as it takes too long. So you walk like one of those fucking cunts in the Olympic Walking Race trying to make it to the toilet. Secondly and more importantly they spend millions on the buildings etc and within a year its like a ghost town (Greece, Brazil). All that fucking money wasted. I say turn the fucking places into Gladiator Colloseum type places and get all the snowflakes, cunts, refugees and politicians to battle it out and when there all gone turn it into luxury flats. The cunts.

    • Love to see my Pomeranians ripping Tim Farrons fucking eyes out the cunt. But wouldn’t want to subject them to such a hideous slug

  10. All charities need a cunting, but especially the ones about starving wogs and refugees. Charities are big business, but only a fraction goes towards the actual cause. The rest is all admin costs and paying the CEO a 6 figure salary.

    But the climate change crowd are the biggest set of cunt bags. Climate change has become a huge fucking industry and a sacred cow for the liberal media and sadly the scientific community too. For a scientist to stand up and say anything which in even the slightest way deviates from the climate change mantra would be the kiss of death to their career. It would be like an imam eating a bacon sarnie. It has become an orthodoxy backed up by spurious claims such as 97% of scientists believe it is true. Apart from being an Argumentum ad populum, it is also factually inaccurate and the study which produced the figure widely discredited. But still they repeat the lie, over and over again, Obarry said it so it must be true. Fucking sheep. Also the notion put around that it will be the end of the world as we know it is complete bollocks. We are not looking at an extinction event or anything like it, even if you take the worst case scenario. The last interglacial period, called the Eemian was about 125,000 years ago. Temperatures were at least 5 degrees warmer than they are now and sea level was 20 to 30 ft higher than today. Did it wipe out the human race? Did it fuck. If some cunt wearing animal skins and living in a fucking cave can survive such a warm spell I’m fucking sure we can. What a bunch of cunts.

    • When I was a kid we were told it was going to be another Ice Age and that it was all our fault.
      Wish the cunts would make their minds up…

  11. i dunno about global warming oops sorry climate change. we are told the ‘science is settled’ but i have a hunch its all a load of bollocks and in a few years the ‘experts’ will admit they got it all wrong. of course you cant argue with the faithful saying you just have a ‘hunch’ but i do, its fuckin hilarious hearing talk of us being able to ‘control ‘ the temperature, can we fuck, the climate will do what it wants, we can only observe.

    • It makes sense to me that burning huge quantities of fossil fuels and thereby altering the balance of the carbon cycle will have consequences. Where I part company with the mainstream is the answer to it: Cutting down the carbon footprint per person in the west is basically fiddling at the edges. In reality the planet is fucked sooner or later if population growth continues at it’s current rate. Tackle population growth and we could stand a chance of keeping it a reasonably pleasant place to live. Unfortunately controlling population growth would need radical ideas like certain religions actually accepting that contraception is a good idea, and an understanding that the constant aim for economic growth is bollocks. That’s before even starting to tackle the “human right” for anyone to have as many sprogs as they want, even if they can’t support them.
      Basically, there are too many vested interest cunts, imaginary friend worshiping cunts, and spineless politician cunts for anything to actually get done.

  12. And now for something completely different;

    An ICM poll out today has put the Tories in front of labour by 19% with 45% Tory versus 26% labour. The only demographic where this dominance is not reflected is the non white vote, where labour have a lead. Surprise surprise.

    In other news, the peaceful man at the centre of the ‘Trojan Horse’ schools scandal is helping to run the Labour campaign machine in Birmingham. Mohammad Ashraf was a governor at Golden Hillock School, which was placed into special measures after it emerged it had segregated boys and girls, banned the teaching of some subjects and taught pupils: “Islam is the true religion, not like those Christians and Jews”

    Someone needs to bury labour, they are starting to smell.

  13. Islam…the religion of peace. Really?

    When was the last time you saw someone holding a severed head other than a Muslim….

  14. Greenpeace are utter cunts, they tried to BAN Chlorine, not just in any particular industrial process, but completely! It’s Element #17 in the Periodic Table FFS. As for “climate change” these gits stopped referring to Global Warming/Cooling because “climate change” covers all bases. Climate is a very complex non-linear system and the idea that a small change is solely responsible is simply crap. (Crap, a scientific phrase I use politely when presented with a view that us utter bollocks). No explanation of observed climate change on Mars, Jupiter and other planets, does ET drive a 4×4?

  15. i have another hunch- Muslims don’t actually know whats in the Quran or what a complete bastard Mohammed was. do they know the Quran claimed the Earth was flat and that the Sun orbits the earth? or that Mohammed had a man murdered and then married his young wife? its total total bollocks and they either know it is and don’t care or they are totally oblivious.

    • Most cannot read the Koran cos they do not speak, read or write Arabic and the Koran is written in Classical Arabic so most are doubly fucked. Very useful as one has to rely on the words of the religious scholars who are mainly fucktards anyway.

  16. Well at least the International Aid Budget is doing its bit, battling the evils of climate change in giving hundreds of thousands of pounds to stop Colombian cows farting, the Chinks and their polluting power stations may as well give up, the battle is won.

  17. As with fathers for justice the cause is a good one but they go about the wrong way by making utter cunts of themselves so no one will take them seriously anymore you just hear fathers for justice or greenpeace and fucking switch off… these cunts have failed bigtime cuz they are ignored before you even know what they are trying to say……restructure your demonstrations fuckers and you will get better results oh and stop being cunts wouldn’t go a miss either

  18. Charity. Don’t make me laugh. The latest scam is to donate to the East African appeal. Why! Learn about contraception first and foremost. Don’t expect the West (mostly the UK) to keep digging deep to pay for your fucking cultural inadequacies. If you can’t feed, clothe, nurture or educate a child, DON’T BRING IT INTO THE WORLD. CUNT’S.

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