Douglas Carswell (2)


Douglas Carswell is a two faced, unprincipled, hypocritical, turncoat cunt.

Call a by election and show us just how ‘honourable’ you really are Carswell!

There was an MP for Clacton
Who once had a UKIP hat on
But despite his defection
He won’t call an election
‘Cos the voters are saying he’s not on

Vote Loony! You know it makes sense…

Nominated by Dioclese

51 thoughts on “Douglas Carswell (2)

  1. And in case you’re wondering what really prompted him to quit UKIP it couldn’t possibly be to get publicity for his new book which is – er….. – about UKIP. Surely such a honourable man would not be so opportunistic???

    • Ah yes…Karsi by name, and Karsi by nature. Now let me see…what exactly was it that I detested right from the start? This smug self arsed individual has never been a true brexiter. He ( prior to the weeks leading to his defection ( or should I say defecation ) had not uttered a single word against the European Union. Suddenly ( almost overnight ) he was a snarling outspoken antagonist of anything even vaguely european. Aha.. a plant! It had to be! Yes folks, this articulate prat who espoused volumes of anti european bile was indeed a disingenuous arsehole of mammoth dimensions feeding from the prompts of his puppet master. The fucker of pigs (Cameron ) had a plant well placed to sabotage UKIP.
      Karsi relished the prospect of fucking over Farage, and in return, he would receive an assured future under the wing of his master. A Ministerial rank perhaps? As soon as Karsi was in UKIP, he fucked over and bitched spot on fucking cue. And now, now his task is done, he will flit back to the nest to collect his reward.

      Well, as we know, all did not go well with the referendum result, and the pig fucker Cameron had flown the nest. His protector, mentor and handler had fucked right off.

      Karsi is now very much alone. Will he be welcomed back to his old party ( I think not ) Will he remain on seat as an independent ( I think not ) Will he stand and win in his old constituency ( I think not ) In short, this odious little fucker is right up shit creek and with few stones to crawl under. The cunting of this miserable twat is well deserved, and his nomination a masterpiece! Karsi the fuckwit.

      • He was always a true Brexiteer in the sense that he wanted to leave the EU and its institutions.However he clearly only jumped ship for opportunistic reasons entirely.He knew he would never ever get a ministerial role under a Cameron administration or any other Tory leader .So feeling like a misfit the size of his own jaw he thought ok how can I make a splash?I know I will join UKIP and as the only (then) Westminster MP will be able to replace Farage after the General Election when it fails under the current electoral system and shape the party in my own image.Problem was he was an awkward cunt who pissed off well over half his new parties members by constantly squaring up to Farage.The fucking brilliant irony is that he could have just stayed and been an awkward arsehole in the Tories and climbed his way up the greasy pole as many have done and one day made a name for himself.Now UKIP hates him the Tories hate him and he will definitely lose Clacton in 2020 and come 2025 no one will remember who he was.He is basically the nerdy awkward kid at school who when his parents were away one weekend had a party and invited all the cool kids snubbing his fellow nerds and tossing them aside to fit in with the cool kids ,only for the cool kids to get pissed and ruin his parents house meaning he is never left a free house again so has nothing to offer the cool kids again.Then he crawls bak to his fellow nerds with his tail between his legs only to be told to fuck off leaving him with absolutely fuck all but a few minutes in the limelight.

  2. Cunt changes his principles to suit his chances of getting elected. A career politician, best avoided.

    • Farage wasn’t wrong when he told people that carswell is ruining ukip from the inside. Although I’m disappointed with farage recently on the recent terrorist attack. Rather than make the obvious point that Masood was a racial alien of recent immigrant origin, and that his ancestral alienness must have been a factor in the lack of empathy he obviously felt towards the British people and his support for ISIS. What the fuck did farage do? he bottled it the prick!

      Farage backed down by calling Masood “British” and halted trying to broaden the discussion to include other attacks committed by first-generation immigrants or british born terrorists continental Europe. To make things worse, the disgusting Baroness Warsi is back doing the only thing she ever did even when she was supposed to be doing other jobs…. defending Islam. Masood “was a violent Christian before he was a violent Muslim,” she tells us. Fuck off Warsi you retarded cunt I don’t care if he smoked crack!

  3. Leaving the party you were elected to represent should be an automatic by election. If he had any honour he would put his seat up for grabs. If they think he does that good a job for them as an individual he will get re-elected as an independent.

    As it his his position is untenable.

  4. Sir Nigel always said this bloke was a snide untrustworty cunt right from the off so that’s good enough for me. The Tories won’t take him back, they just don’t need him. I’ve heard that he is a very good constituency MP so, fair play, and he may fancy his chances in Clacton. However, he will hang on, in my opinion, because of the pay off and pension that these wankers get. If you look it up you will be staggered at what these cunts pay themselves when they get kicked out even if they have only served one parliamentary term. If he goes for a by-election he’s a bigger man than I thought he was and fair play to the cunt.

  5. Fucking EU can go and fuck off. I remember when Maggie got a rebate for the UK only for that wanky cunty fucking wank stain piece of shit off a shovel lying champagne socialist tosspot Blair to give it back. It cost this country over 9 billion pounds.

  6. Maybe subliminal messages do work.

    When I opened the page the first letters that jumped out was ‘ars’.

    Don’t know much about the guy, but after reading about him jumping ship, I recognized he was definitely a cunt.

    A cheeky slippery cunt.

  7. Did he crash face first into a wall, as a child ?

    Or is that an Easter Island head ?

      • If Dick comes on ,Excuse the pun,Tavener runs tomorrow 4.50 was 9/2 but now is 7/1,He backed it the other day but its been quickly turned out again????

        • Cheers ANDZ, It didn’t get the mile the other day,reckon it’s got a good chance dropping back,but it always seems to find one too good. It’ll be waiting for the time I don’t back it,it’ll be sure to win then.

      • One day ANDZ, one day that cunt Branson will do us all a massive favour and take a bunch of sleb/politico cunts up into outer space and kill the lot.

        Fingers crossed his first few space trip go as planned so the cunts are confident enough to take the trip.

        And then boom, cunts.

        The downside will be that the sleb/politico cunts left on earth will get this put down as the greatest tragedy mankind has ever known.

        If the right cunts die, that could be worth it.

        Bransons Death Rocket Nominations.

        Elton John/David Furnish
        Brendan Rodgers
        The entire Big Bang cast
        The entire Modern Family cast
        Coldplay

    • I met him in person once and the jaw is even more noticeable in real life!Definitely had some bad fight or accident as a child.

  8. Can’t wait to hear him explain why he has left himself once he quits his party of one.

  9. MEP cry baby Seb Dance is a small cocked, traitorous cunt.

    I can never stop looking at Carswells mouth, he reminds me of Mr Mackay from Porridge when he talks from the side of his mouth.

  10. Yes he is a hooky-gobbed, untrustworthy, treacherous cunt.

    I’ve never liked the cut of this cunt. He seems to drift to wherever the wind is blowing that day.

    I can’t imagine any book writtem by this boring cunt will be worth reading – unless it’s this month’s Insomniacs Anonymous book choice for a good night’s sleep.

    In the previous thread it was said that UKIP isn’t a legitimate choice between the Connies and Labour – it isn’t (neither is the joke Liberal party either), it still has too much negativity associated with it with regards to racism, etc.

    Much of that was down to being constantly negatively portrayed on UK TV. Some of the documentaries following the Thanet UKIP campaign was scandalous focusing on former BNP members and some old fucking racist woman who was the Thanet UKIP press officer.

    Even so, as a party it’s damaged goods and having Paul “Mind yer car mistah!” Nuttall at the helm is a surefire way to guarantee that HMS UKIP heads straight for the iceberg!

    No staunch Conny or Labour voter would go anywhere near UKIP and even thinking of voting for wickle Timmy Farron is an even bigger joke.

    The UK political landscape is wide open for a legitimate alternative party. I think it should be called the “Common Sense” party. If the Connies have a good idea, nick it. If Labour has a good idea, nick it. A good idea is a good idea no matter which cunt thinks of it.

    It pisses my off to see decent ideas pooh-poohed by either side – not because it was a crap idea – but just because it wasn’t *their* idea! Talk about cutting your nose off to spite your face! Except it’s the British Taxpayer who loses out, not the cunt MPs who are whipped one way or the other simply to tow a party line.

    The manifesto for the “Common Sense” party would be a peace of piss to write too: “The Common Sense Party pledges to the people of the UK to make decisions which are based solely on irrefutable common sense. The Exchequer will only make economic decisions if they make common sense for the good of the UK economy. State departments will only make state decisions if they make common sense for the UK. This is the pledge of the Common Sense Party and we urge all citizens of the UK to vote for us. It’s common sense after all.”

    A pipe dream but if anyone had wherewithal and resources to start a party with that message they’d gain a lot of traction and would have the attention of a lot of the Tory/Labour middle ground voters who feel totally disenfranchised with their own parties.

    The only fly in the ointment being finding enough respectable candidates to run for seats without attracting back-stabbing treacherous cunts like Carswell or nutters like Nuttalls!

    • Unfortunately, we have the terrifying prospect of another political party formed by twats from the blairite labour cunts, lib dem cast offs, and opportunistic Tory twats like Carswell, capitalising on the vacuum that exists in the left of centre area that the Labour Party used to occupy before Corbyn took them back to the 70s commie style. And, with the liberal left leaning brainwashing this country has been subjected to in the last twenty years, the cunts would probably win.

  11. Farage should never have quit, now would have been the perfect time to build to build up support and ride the Brexit wave and provide some real opposition. Corbyn the trot and the Momentum cunts are unelectable, Tim Farron and the Lib Dems are as useful as a used tampon and wouldn’t be surprised to see some sly fucker in the Tories to pull a Major and stab May in the back. If anything he would at least tell Wee Jimmy Krankie and rest of the haggis munching sporran fuckers to bore off back up north.

    Katie Hopkins on LBC was on fire & cunted Phillip Schofield for walking across Westminster Bridge to show he was not cowered by the attack, get back to your fucking sofa cunt.

    • Katie Hopkins was excellent on Tucker Carlson last week also.

      It definitely comes to something when you have to rely on Katie Hopkins to be the voice of reason.

    • I get that Nigel wanted and deserved a break but if he lead UKIP over the next two years it would have survived as a political force.However problem always would have been that he was the glue holding UKIP together and whenever he went the party was always going to eat itself.

    • Katie should team up with Nige and form a new political party… Get backing off Big Don, offer an alternative to Steptoe Corbyn and Spoilt Bastard Farron and Fanny’s yer auntie…

      • If Farage and Hopkins teamed up, the snowflake mushroom cloud would be seen and heard for miles….

  12. He’s weird looking cunt. His mouths nearer the side of his face than the front.

  13. Just when you thought TV couldn’t reach higher (or is it lower?) levels of cuntitude…
    Mrs Brown’s Cunts…. Now with added celebricunt guests….
    Louis Walsh, Pamela Anderson, James ‘Cunt’ Blunt, Judy ‘Norma Bates’ Murray…
    The horror… The fucking horror….

    • Didn’t Saint Caroline Of The Blessed Never Was A Drunken Husband Abuser Merton do the irritating old lady ‘interviewing’ celebricunts gag already?… Mrs Brown’s Bollocks is bad enough… But with celeb twats too?! The glass on the cuntometer is about to shatter…

      • You’d think living abroad I’d escape this tat, but no, the missus buys any box set of this tat she doesn’t already have.

        It’s fuuuckin terrible.

        I think it’s filmed in Glesga, but I don’t know coz Glesga’s audiences used to be famous for being a hard crowd to please.

        Many comedians where sent packing, but these daft cunts piss themselves at a guy overreacting to everything.

        And they ‘bloopers’ are set up.

        Totally amateurish, totally outdated and totally shite.

    • In a couple of years I’ll be able to say that the missus is better looking than Pamela Anderson.

      If she hasn’t dumped me.

      🙂

  14. Thought for the night….
    Wonder how many cocks that Banana Gob has actually munched?…
    Well into tripe figures, I’ll wager…

  15. The cold weather is a cunt.

    Last night the clock changed, and I usually love this time of year, but not this year coz its nine fuckin degrees tonight and was eight fuckin degrees last night.

    I’m indoors and my finger bones are killing me its that fuckin cold.

    I know in blighty it gets colder than this, but I ain’t used to it, as I only come back in warmer weather.

    I haven’t felt a British winter for sixteen years now and I don’t know if I ever will now.

    Its been a mild winter so far and I thought it might be day out weather soon, but it don’t look like it.

    I saw snow a couple of months ago for the first time in sixteen years in the mountains behind me.
    That was nice. 🙂

    Stay warm this spring, cunters.

    • I am more comfortable with cold weather then hot maybe I’m just really thin skinned birdman but I get really fatigued and lazy in hot weather. In fact anymore then 30C and I’m pretty much useless. My dad always said us brits don’t adjust to it well perhaps hes right I dunno of course everyones different…. Now I can’t get this song out of my head https://youtu.be/6QftnPNjQXs funny song I think

      • Aw TitSlapper, I hate Mark E Smith with a vengeance.

        Now I’ve got to get try and get some kip coz I’m up in three hours.

        Gonna be that bit more difficult now. 🙂

        I love hot weather, the hotter the better for me.

        The ladies wear less. 🙂

        • “Aw TitSlapper, I hate Mark E Smith with a vengeance.” doesn’t fucking everybody tho?! say what you want about him but the guys working class people always complaining there isn’t any working class type bands anymore what bout the fall? cunts!

          The problem is he has released alot of shit albums especially 90’s era material and his most current albums are not really good. Tho despite his inconsistency he has released more albums then the beatles and rolling stones put together I hate his rants spoken word shite but I love his songs early fall was pretty good for what it was worth Yeah the ladies wear less but they are still evil cunts!

          • Smith is a proper Bitter Blue Man City cunt, and I’m no fan of The Fall, but he is a dry as fuck funny cunt too… Mark should have done stand-up comedy…

          • Its his interviews years ago that makes me dislike him.

            As Norman pointed out, he was very dry.

            Maybe I was too young to get his humour, but every interview came across as if he hated everyone.

          • Liam is pissy with interviewers and rags that have slagged him off in the past, but he’s usually funny with it.

            After reading the Guardian interview , I know I wasn’t wrong about Smith.

            I’d knock the cunt out. 🙂

            Why are they interviewing him ?
            He’s a fuckin no-mark gobshite.

  16. Hello cunters. Great cunting of Carswell, though wasn’t too sure on the Limerick so had a go meself:

    There was an MP called Doug
    who treated the public like mugs
    the nonchalant drip fucked over the ‘Kip
    And now he’s off to May for a tug

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