Baby on board stickers

Another thing which riles my shit are these cunting stupid “Baby on Board” stickers in car windows. Loosely translated it means “I’m the only woman in the world to have a child…My other half is a limp wristed hipster cunt who keeps his bollocks in my handbag and my child is the centre of the solar system and you WILL move out of the way”. Cuntish behaviour illustrated.

I put it to people like that, that I don’t give a well-rounded first wank if there’s a “Baby on Board”. What cuntish difference will that make to me? Bugger all. What’s next? “Second Cousin Thrice Removed Inbred Weirdo Shit-Slurping Mong Farrier on Board”. What a load of Generation Snowflake, Entitlement-Era mule shit.

Nominated by: TwatVarnish

106 thoughts on “Baby on board stickers

  1. I reckon all miss behaving kids in cars should be subjeckted to electric shocks until they shut the fuck up,talking of shutting the fuck up charlotte church has opened her big gob again and lied about being asked to sing at trumps enorgeration, even if trump is a treble cunt it,s doubtfull he ever heard of the welsh slapper,i cant wait for lilly the mongs comments next…cunts

  2. Shithouse muvvas and their horrid noisy kids should be banned from all public cafes and coffee shops,they do my fucking fruit in,noisy horrible things,seems now nowhere is safe to chill out with a meal and a coffee without a screaming brat nearby,and dont mention flights,ive had some flights from hell locked in a tin tube for four hours with brattage screaming non stop,if I enter a cafe/pub the first thing il do is survey the area for brats before deciding,fucking boils my piss little fuckerz

    • You already know theres a cunt on board when you see a baby on board sticker. Little chortle to myself 😊

  3. There’s some great bumper stickers sold on line that you can covertly attatch to cunts cars who have parked inconsiderately, or who you see parked up, and you know drives like a cunt.

    Some favourites:

    Only fat queer cops give me tickets..

    Stay back at least 100ft I’m wanking….

    I love gay porn…

    I’m not gay but £20 is £20…

    I always drive fast, I’ve got drugs to sell….

  4. I want a car sticker that says “Don’t piss about… I can be a cunt, you cunt”.

  5. Thought of the day,why did they do away with hard labour,And i always thought the workhouse was a good idea,Why not bring it back ,The migrant what are here could be put to good use in these places,Your thoughts.

    • It’s not babies but their half baked parents. ‘Baby on Board’ means precisely fuck all. Does it mean you would have otherwise rammed the cunts but the sign made you veer off at the last second?

      • I know I was joking I mostly hate all car stickers, I hate when I see one cause then out of curiosity I have to read it. Its distracting as it is informative and annoying.

        • I have rather novel score charts on my car indicating various road kills available on my commute spanning from wildlife, to cyclists an pensioners. £4. On flee bay.

  6. Why is it the same cunts when little darling snotty cunts are not in the car proceed to drive their people carrier shiteheap like they are Juha Kankunnen?

    Child on board sign only visible for 0.002 seconds as they blast in and out of your field of vision.

  7. Gumtree is a cunt,

    I have advertised a piece of equipment on there to SELL and some fucking weird cunt texts me asking if he can rent the fucking thing. This knobhead is a disgrace to the word cunt. Un fucking believable. I told the cunt he can rent it for the price advertised. I should have agreed though, met the cunt and given him a kick in the bollocks. Fucking CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT.

    • O yeah,I advertised a pretty good but old car For £195 but to get a freeby ad put £1.95 thinking common sense would prevail but alas no.Dick shite spliff heads were phoning up expecting to buy a 2002 Renault laguna with 7 months mot for 2 quid,thick benefits scrounging cunts.

  8. There is posters being put up on bus stops here in Spain that have ruffled a lot of feathers.
    The posters show outline drawings of two boys and two girls running hand in hand through the countryside naked.

    The boys have vaginas and the girls have penis’s (don’t know the plural for more than one penis).
    A line above says ” there are girls with penis’s and boys with vulvas”
    The news crew then asked the public what they thought. They all said it was too much, so the reporter then cut to an interview with Spanish pornstar Nacho Vidal who is one of the sick cunts who are trying to promote this sickness.
    Obviously he’s well up for it and we’re the ignorant ones.

    Where the fuck is Franco when you need him. (I know he’s dead).

    The next thing on the news was litter problems. Spain is full of litter and I’ve always notice that food wrappers don’t have “keep Spain clean” notices like we had in Britain as kids. Teaching us from an early age to respect your surroundings.

    They cant teach youngsters to keep the country litter free, but they can teach them to respect sex changes.

    Maybe Nacho Vidal and any other sleazy cunt who promotes this filth can club together and send the freaks to a “special” school that caters to their needs.
    And the “normal” schools can begin to reach the kids to use litter bins, or they can wait until home time and throw it at the freaks from the special school.

    • The other day i mentioned “PANSEXUAL” meaning they don’t recognize gender.
      I wonder if they’d recognize gender when one cock is gagging their throat and another cock is ripping their arse to shreds.

  9. Vera ‘Big Cunt’ Lynn
    Peter Sallis
    Denis Norden
    Lord Peter Carrington
    Leah Bracknell

  10. I commented on this just recently:

    It’s the same mentality with those cunts who put stupid ‘Baby On Board’ stickers in their cars. What are the rest of us supposed to do? Drive extra extra carefully because there’s a small infant in the proximity of our vehicle? Yeah, I was going to go around this roundabout on 2 wheels, but since I saw that sticker I’ll play it safe and refrain. Fuck right off. I don’t give a shit. I’m going to drive carefully and safely if there’s a bastard kid in your car or not, so fuck right off. If your sprog mobile flipped into the air and crashed down on its roof mashing all occupants including your bastard tax burden kid, as long as I can drive around the wreck and be on my way, I don’t care. It doesn’t affect me and I could not care less if there’s a baby on board or not. Not my problem.

    As regular cunters know, I fucking hate kids. That said, I can understand why parents of babies/young children would be ultra protective of their brats and consider them the centre of THEIR universe. However, what they fail to realise is the rest of us don’t. There is absolutely no onus on me to care for or protect other people’s fucking kids. Simply put, I don’t give a shit. It’s bad enough money is taken from me by force in the form of tax to subsidise the result of other people fucking. As an adult, I should be able to go about my adult business, without let or hindrance and without being constantly subjected to the noise, disruption and utter chaos created by other people’s bastard kids. But you can’t. They’re everywhere. Supermarket – there they are. Pub – there they are. Plane – there they are. Footie match – there they are. Fancy restaurant – there they are. Business office – there they are. The list is endless. Modern life is fast paced and stressful enough without the absolute dereliction of duty by parents who seem to think we should all just be considerate of and tolerate their revolting bastard shitty offspring. Advertising that in the form of ‘Baby on Board’ stickers is the last word in arrogance. Parents – just fuck off and take your scum sucking, germ spreading, loudhailer, tax burden midgets with you.

    • Woah, calm down, calm down 🙂

      Are you feeling grumpy coz of all the Obama loving that’s going into overdrive just now ?

      Did anybody see that shitefest ?
      I reckon i lasted seven seconds before turning off.
      It was live on Spanish news channel and Al Jazeera.
      Is it any wonder the USA believe they are the world , when other cuntries lick their arses/asses constantly.
      Cunts were crying in the audience FFS.

      • Ha, Birdman. I’m imagining you saying that with a ’70s porn star moustache, perm and a Scouse accent.

        The Obastard love-fest is truly nauseating. OK, so he’s hardly likely to go on stage and say, “Well, my ‘hope and change’ message was utter bullshit, I have absolutely failed by any objective measure and I’m deeply embarrassed by the catastrophic cunt up I’ve made of everything”. That said, the dishonesty is truly disgusting. The man has failed in his quest to transform America into a socialist Marxist state. Just! He has ruled by executive order, has undermined and disregarded the intent of the Constitution, has brought shame on the office of the President and has practically bankrupted the country for generations to come. Oh yes and he’s destroyed his own political party in the process. People are lining up to pat him on the back? Jesus christ on a bike – the man should be in jail for crimes against humanity and all that is decent.

        Anyone who voted for that cunt should be ashamed as well. Bye Bye Obastard and your wolf-man wife.

  11. Parent and toddler spaces at supermarkets. They’re another ridiculous idea. They didn’t have them when I was a toddler back in the mid 1970’s, and I don’t see why we should have them now. Arseholes with young children, particularly mothers, are entitled enough without this indulgence. I often park in one of these spaces if I can’t find a normal one, or if my disabled mother isn’t with me. Well, walking across a car park to a store never did me any harm, it won’t hurt a modern parent’s progeny either.

  12. I couldn’t give a fuck what any fucker’s got “On Board”. I’ll continue to drive like the selfish,inconsiderate, malicious cunt that I am.

    Clear the carriageway,Cunts, I’m coming through.

    • Fuck it Dick they should of gave you a tank and sent you to Molsul it would of all been over in less than a week and i would of come along for the ride.

      • There’d have been no streams of refugees clogging up the highways if they’d met me barrelling along in a Challeger 2.

          • Just backed Sennockian Star 7.45 at kemp,Better fucking win,I;m getting fucking fed up with this horse.If dont win i will put a fucking sticker on my car saying i’m a twat.

          • Jackpot ANDZ, you’ll be able to take the wife out for a slap-up meal this weekend….or did you forget to tell her that it won?

          • Happy days,About time the fucker won ,I thought i’d look on here first before checking result so i just got back and checked on here first,Mite back General hazard tomorrow LuLu Stanford is the pilot i’ve not checked what stall it come’s out of yet so i will look into it more.

  13. Cyclists get cunted all the time on this fine site, I’m sure a lot deserve it, but some like myself don’t.
    I always respect the car and even on one way streets while I’m doing about 30mph , i still pull in to let ignorant cunts that never thank me, pass.
    Over the last six months I’ve had cunts either cut me off or pull out of parking spaces forcing me to break suddenly and dismount.
    Three times in the last year, I’ve asked for square goes with motorists who have fucked me over, and three times they have sped off, shiteing it.
    This morning some so called hard cunt nearly took my hand off as he opened his door right onto me.
    I have flashing lights, yet this cunt still never saw me.
    After challenging the so called hard man, he mouthed a few more insults and sped off, coz i think he may have soiled his pant.

    As i mentioned, a lot on here hate cyclists, but remember they work out and might not be as soft as they look in their dodgy gear. And some like me are fucking psychos, who cant wait for a motorist to act the cunt.

    • I must say I hate cyclists but not ALL of them. Some r actually ok.
      What fucks me off is when I’m at the lights, indicating left and the cunt stops right in front by my left indicator. He then takes most of the phase just to pull off and gives me the wanker sign if I dare to look even the slightest bit pissed off.

      Though having stopped working in London I find the cyclists (slighly) less militant. Some even stop behind and let me pull off first!

      A cyclist even pulled over the other day and let the queue past, which I’d never seen before.

      I think cyclists are slowly becoming more considerate to other road users so they’re getting a bit more respect from me.




      • Sorry, but I fucking hate cyclists. Not all, mostly those cunts in their fucking ridiculous black latex gear and headgear, who ride two-abreast, normally on country roads that barely have enough width for a car alone, or those ones who think that traffic lights don’t apply to them. Also the cunts that ride on the pavement, either coming up behind you silently and zooming by about a centimetre away from your body, or trilling their little cunt bell angrily, indigent that you have the nerve to be walking on the pavement in their way.
        Cunts. Motorists should be allowed by law to run over these knob jockeys and pedestrians allowed to ‘washing-line’ those pavement cunts as they go by.

  14. Saw a good sticker on a car once. It said ’employ a youth while he knows everything’. Wish there were stickers for ‘politicaly aware young adult on board’, I’d fucking drive 2 bastard inches behind em all the fucking way. Young know it all cunts.

    • Who me ? MAMIL ?
      No, it’s shirts , trainers, and windbreaker when its cold.
      I too detest a lot of cyclists in Lycra who take themselves seriously.
      I love tearing past a group of the cunts on my cheaper bike.
      I don’t do it to be a cyclist, and i hate running ,i do it coz i turned 40 a year and half ago and noticed the muscles i had were getting spongy.
      Now i do about 80 km a week, and 500 pushups, 300 sit ups and 300 pull ups a day, seven days a week.
      I’ve never felt better.
      The weird thing is in the shower. It feels like I’m washing another guy coz i’m buff as fuck.

      • Fuck it bird i turn fucking fifty this year i need a personal trainer,You can give me some tips,Will i have to give up smoking?.

        • Not at all.
          I smoke constantly. Even when I’m out on my push bike, i take a doob
          I go along the coast, and there are some nice quiet spots to get stoned under the stars.
          The ride back home is a bit slower though.
          As for training. Just fit in some pushups and sit ups when you can. Spread them out through the day. Start of with twenty each time, and stop if when you feel pain. Working through the pain is not macho. I do a hundred pushups every time i make a brew.
          Little by little, you’ll get there.

          • PS. I think my best workout is catching seven budgies everyday.
            Remember Rocky trying to catch the chicken as part of his training ?
            Seven fucking budgies.

            Pps. Smoking. I used to run 10k’s for charidee, and always sparked a tab just after i crossed the finish line.
            The looks on the faces of the cunts who took fitness seriously, was priceless.

            Three more budgies to go.

          • Fuck it Bird i see the light like a cunt i;ve just bought one of them pull up bars and i’ve got it up in my cunt cave,Time to get myself back in shape,Happy Days.

          • Andz, please be careful with them pull up bars.
            I’ve got a frame on my roof that i use.
            They bars scare me shitless.

            Congrats on the win……… last.

  15. Is there a sticker available that says “Smug Selfie Generation totally absorbed with i-phone ” available. This could be positioned next to the seating position for said Millennial Cunt to act as an aiming point should one wish to launch a ramming attack… Snowflake Cunts

  16. I posit the theory that the number of cynical bastards deliberately tail-gating precious twats with ‘baby on board’ stickers outnumbers those who curb an irresistible urge to ram said cunts.Ashamed to say , I am one such bastard.

  17. Now Piers Morgan is usally a cunt but I’m gonna temporarily uncunt him for the way he handled that daft bitch Sarah Louise Bryan who sent her 3 year old daughter to a friends house to play wearing a 300 quid pair of one and twos. The kid then returns home with some marks on the said Jemima Choos and then sends the other mum an invioce for 3 ton to replace them. You stupid stupid stupid jumped up pretentious, ostentatious, vulgar bitch. So when Piers Morgan starts having a go at her she starts blubbering and whinging about he has no idea about the bullying she’s had and that she was abused as a kid. The thick cow has now fucked it up completely for her daughter. No other parent will go near her now so she’ll have fuck all friends to play with at all. Mind you she’d already bought the kid over 60 pairs so the poor girl’s been on a loser from the start. Daft cunt. Having said that she is worth a poke.(the mum!)

  18. Makes me want to crash into the cunts even more.

    Just to destroy that stupid fucking “look at me! Me and my kids are precious, annoying cunts” sign.

  19. My next cunting:

    Sarah Louise Bryan

    I feel I have a duty to cunt Sarah Louise Bryan and all her ilk.

    For those that don’t know she is (another) useless cunt (“fashion” designer apparently) that has no concept of the real world or anyone that lives there.

    This prick made clothing from fucking public hair for crying out loud!  ….who the fuck is gonna buy that!!!!

    That’s not even the reason she’s a cunt!

    She sent her 3 year old daughter out with  £325 fluffy fuckin boots on,  then when they get fucked she sent an invoice to the poor cunt that was stupid enough to have her round. Apparently her daughter has 60 pairs of shoes!

    Even THAT’S not the reason she’s a cunt!

    She got mugged of by piers Morgan and cried.


    If you’re sat in a room with piers Morgan and YOU are the biggest cunt then a word has yet to be invented to express your cuntitude!

    • She must have got the idea for the pubic hair clothing from the balaclavas i wore as a kid.
      I’m sure they were made from pubes.
      I remember my mum making me wear it , and I’d sulk all the way to school.
      I couldn’t take it of or my big sister (CUNT) would grass me in.
      And when it got wet, fuck that was torture.

      • Yea I had some keks like that! Always had to go to church on a Sunday in these fuckin horrible trousers and sit on cold, hard wooden pews, itching my arse off!
        …and the church wonders why the numbers r going down.

  20. …..Sorry that was supposed to say pubic hair, not pubic hair!

    ….fuckin autos pellets.


    auto spell!

    • For starting her email with “So…” , alone , this silly woman is worthy of a cunting – it’s bad enough in speech , but to actually commit it to a written communique is indicative of her general fuck-wittery.
      I am interested to know if she harvested the pubes for her dress from her own crotch over a protracted period (unless it was a doll’s dress) or extended her activities to include her friends’ clippings , in which case they appear to be more understanding than she is.

      • I’ve been sending Gemma Arterton my pubic hair clippings for years. Can’t wait to see her at the Oscars in a dress made of my crotch-wig shavings.

        • Thanks for providing me with that indelible image , Dick . You’d think she would have reciprocated your kindness by furnishing you with a little something woven from her own sacred triangle – a toupee perhaps , even if you don’t need one. I know I’d shave my head to accommodate such a wondrous object.Ah , the closeness of her…

      • I was wondering that.
        Is it a collection of random cunts or was she keeping her own in a bag in the drawer?
        ….how would u explain that!!

        • A couple of months ago i mentioned a flatmate i had that used to leave saucers of her pubes by the communal kitchen sink.
          No shame, that one.

    • I bet her old man is going to keep his head down for a while.
      Imagine his workmates firstly sending him a bill for an imagined damaged object and secondly leaving out bits of their pubes to pass on to his stupid cunt of a wife.

  21. Fathers who have these are basically saying “yes, I’ve had sex with a woman. So usually stuck in the cars of ugly twats or self absorbed bellends.

    At work we have to have a whip-round when a bloke becomes a father, for fucks sake, everyone stand round and congratulate him on shagging his wife. Although seeing some of their wives they deserve a fucking medal.

  22. 7 yr old girl gets her throat slit by a 15 yr old girl using a stanley knife a bloody stanley knife FFS! fucking brutal stuff and the bullshit media won’t name the girls name or ethnicity of the girl.

    I think they should tho and they should torture that little cunt, I bet you shes a little minging haji w0G or something. Probably get 2 years in juve tops (juvenile detention that is). I cant see this fucking little slag doing much time, justice system is a plodding joke, I tell you if I was the father I’d be angry as fuck

    • Should be a whole life tariff.I really hate the argument kids don`t know anything is wrong.When I was 15 I knew full well that slitting a 7 year old girls neck was not only wrong but completely evil!Why does the law protect scum like her.I dread to think what the family are going through.

    • I remember being genuinely shocked by what happened to James Bulger. Poor sod. I realise I hate kids and all, but that was beyond heinous. Those bastards who killed that little boy should be in a lab somewhere being experimented on. No anesthetic. Cunts. I think many people, including myself, thought that would be a one off. Was it fuck!

  23. Anyone with any sort of sticker on a car window is a cunt.

    Be it “baby on board”, “we have been ty Twycross zoo” or anything else

  24. King Mohammed/ad VI of Morocco is a cunt for getting his fat ugly gay face pictured with every Moroccan “refugee” he meets on his travels.
    The gay King is the richest monarch in Africa and the”refugees” from his cuntry pose for selfies with him in New York shops and Paris streets and nightclubs all over the world.
    What are they running from and what status of “refugee” are they if they pose with the gay king.

    The king of Morocco is gay, by the way.

      • Yep, G A Y nightclubs.
        Google the cunts images, he looks like a fatter George Michael, in garish clobber.

        He’s a descendant of The poofet Mohammed/ad.
        His family used to keep “dancing” boys who were aged between 8 and 13 or 14.

  25. With regard to pubic creations I remember Jackass cobbled together a beard for Erhen to do Jihadi Terrorist sketch made out of all their curly clippings unbeknown to him. It transpired that one of the contributors had brought crabs to the party. When they owned up and showed him a video of the jape he was compelled to ask if the use of real pubes was absolutely necessary. When they mentioned the crabs it was technicolour upchuck time. Fucking hilarious, well worth a look to those who don’t seen it.

  26. Not sure the use of rear window stickers is totally negative… Could be a major market in “I’ve been to Syria” stickers fitted with a transponder… Not sure the RAF is up to the contract as most of their adverts feature joining up to air freight aid to people who want to kill us .. but I think Russian Frontal Aviation would be up for it, plus they still use Cluster Munitions… Happy Days. Or N’Dravya as they say in Tartus… Cheers Lads

  27. Misbehaving kids need a fucking smack end of.All this mollycoddling is systematically wrecking our civilization.Before I went to University I used to fear getting cancer more than anything but now I fear being left with the millennial generation after the baby boomers and Generation X`ers die out! more than anything!

  28. Charlotte Church is a cunt…
    The tuneless snowflake hypocrite rugby team shagger gobshite is at it again..
    Church claims she was invited to sing at President Trump’s inauguration ceremony, and she declined by saying ‘I think you’re a a tyrant! Bye!’

    Church’s ‘invitation’ is from the same place as Lily Mong’s ‘racist taxi driver’: from the imagination of some bullshitting celebrity bubbleheaded attention seking cunt who just wants to up their own publicity and their status in the snowflake food chain… Cunt…

    • I hear some of the shite Charlotte Church comes out with and i think , yeah, I’d still love to root that.

    • Here here!!

      Recon they’re talking bollocks though.

      If these lefty snowflakes are to be believed, everyone on the planet that has ever released a record has been invited to play!
      …but they all made a stand because supporting the most powerful man on the planet is “against their principals”.

      Good luck to ya then.

      Lucky you can sing coz you wouldn’t last 2 minutes in business!

    • Stupid warbling cunt. She just can’t keep her beak out of it can she.
      Fucking liar as well. Why would Trump ask a cunt like that anyway. Her and Lily mong need to get a grip and decide to fuck off.
      Do us all a favour you pair of turds and piss off.

  29. Rush fans are cunts….
    Nothing really against Rush the band, but their fans are the most pompous, humourless, and up themselves cunts… If any drummer is praised online: whether it’s Bonham, Baker, MItchell, Moon, Reni or Ringo, these insufferable cunts take offence and squeal ‘What about Neil Peart from Rush?!’ ‘Peart is better than suchabody will ever be!’ ‘Polls say that Peart is the best!’ and other such shite… It isn’t a pissing contest, for fuck’s sake.. Like it’s a crime to like any other rock drummer than the bloke from Rush… He probably is a good drummer, but these cunts need to get a life and their heads out of their arses…. Rush fans: the rock music version of Harry Potter fancunts…

    • To be fair, Peart is a fucking ace drummer and a proper student of drumming excellence. That said, having been to a couple of Rush concerts and rubbed shoulders with the adoring masses, there is a high degree of snobbery when it comes to how their heroes are perceived. Geddy Lee and Alex Lifeson are also extremely good musicians, but as you rightly say Norm, it’s not a pissing contest. It’s extremely difficult and rather pointless trying to rank musicians down the years. Except for Killing Joke who are the best band ever, so there. 🙂

    • I haven’t met many Rush fans, but when i have I’ve always been amazed at how fanatical they are.
      Rush are shite.

      I always feel kinda sorry for the drummer in Travis. I know he’s made money and traveling the globe, but when he started out, i bet he thought he was going to ROCK.
      Even after the first album he thought he was going to ROCK.
      And the Fran Healey put paid to that.

      • Always thought Oasis were rotten to Tony Mac… Decent lad, good drummer… Alan White was OK too, but it was nothing Tony couldn’t have done himself… Best drummer Oasis had though was Zak Starkey… Better than his dad….

        • Chris Sharrock for me, even though he was in the La’s , even though he was in Blobbie Walliams band.

          When i typed sharrock, the spell check put ” Shattuck” what or who the fuck is Shattuck ?

          Just googled it. Its an Episcopal affiliated boarding school in America.

          Fuck being sent to Shattuck.
          It sounds dirty and scary.

        • I’m a Rush fan but not a blind fanboy and a cunt obviously but I agree Peart idol worshipping can get past the point of comfortable. These delusional cunts saying “BEST DRUMMY EVAR” Its the same with John Bonham, Bill Bruford, Ginger Baker or whoever.

          To give credit to Neil Peart not only is he a amazing brilliant drummer but a great songwriter thats pretty rare for a drummer to write so many songs, to lead the band like that. So technically thats why he is so admired but I agree his fans are obsessive nitwits who can’t be reasoned with

  30. I’d like to give a polished cunting to these morbidly obese cunts in mobility scooters/lard wagons who claim that they’re “disabled” and demand that society should fund them. Disabled my lime scented arse. It’s not a genuine disability you whaleshaming fucks. You weren’t born obese. It’s a Williams trailer full of fucking pies and cakes. They cruise around the instore bakery like sharks circling a dying whale.

    I’m minding my own business, quietly going about my daily and trying to get my shopping done and get the fuck out of there and go home, and these mobile Sumo wrestlers tear-arse down the paths and nearly knock me into the cunt road. Disabled my cock. Anything that’s self-inflicted doesn’t get my sympathy and it’s an insult to people who are genuinely disabled and/or have illnesses they never asked for. Trying to help someone who won’t be helped is like going clay shooting with a piano. Pointless.

    “It’s because they’ve had a tough life” come the comments and replies from teddy-huggers monthly, libtard unicornland and SJW dying swan devotees. What a crock of express shit. My life hasn’t turned out the way I would have liked in a lot of ways, but I don’t sit there and drink Mazola and spoon-feed myself axle grease like it’s going out of fashion. My piss levels get steamed when I and many others work their balls out to support idle feckless oil slurpers like this…and their sausage-roll habit. My piss evaporates before me. Sweet Christ just no.

    • OMG! So many brilliant one liners in this post, TV. Thanks for the laughs. I’m going with “my lime scented arse” as my favourite. Cheers – I.Y.

    • Fat cunts should be cunted remorselessly. Always someone else’s fault, lack of potty training or whatever.
      No you cunts, it’s down to you. Stop stuffing your fat face with lard and try walking even 10 yards and you may find some improvement in your health.
      But no, put your hand out for a mobility scooter and sympathy. Well none of that here you greedy bastards.

      • Yep, I have to agree. The thing that always runs through my twisted mind when I see a very seriously massively large obese lardarse is…..why did you not think that was a problem when you were half that size?

        I, like many I’m sure, put on a few over the festive period and I’m now in a state of self loathing because my fucking jeans are tight. That said, with all this evolving going on over millions of years, you’d think the human body would let you eat pizza and burgers as often as you’d like and still have a physique like Ronaldo.

        • Only exercise the fat cunts ever had was walking to the chippy, now they just chuck a flabby arse cheek either side of the reinforced seat of their wobble trolley, spark up a fag, and off they go. Every now and then, I wonder if I could push one over, like cow tipping.

        • I eat veggie burgers and pizza all the time.
          Had a quorn chicken pizza tonight, and I’ve got a physique like Ronaldo.

          If i try hard enough i might get one similar to Cristiano ronaldo.

          • Talking of fat cunts that fat cunt Corden is in an irritating advert where him and a dopey mate are driving looking for somewhere to stuff his fat face and I looks up and says to the missus ” how is that fat fucker so popular in America ” and she come back with the classic line ” it’s probably because he’s shaped like an American ” fucking hell I laughed

    • You mean these rappers aren’t the well mannered gentleman that they claim to be?…. SHOCKING! Its as if the corporate music industry knows rappers are dangerous shitbags but only care bout the money they generate strange stuff

      Dindu’s gonna Dindu what do you except? and yeah if the individual was white no doubt it would be a international headline

  31. Lets all agree rap is shite, i would of said crap but that would’ve been a verse.
    The thing I’ve always hated most about rap is
    Uh, yeah
    Uhuh yeah, yeah
    Uh yeah
    Uhuh yeah, yeah

    That could be a whole verse in a rap song.
    Thirty plus years and counting.
    Stop it, just stop it.

  32. In 2009 in the smoke I was on the tube between White City and Euston station (I think). As this tube turned out to be a bus replacement I managed to be stood right at the front (i.e. face mushed into the windscreen because a bus intended for 60 people was carrying 160) when I noticed one of these cunt on board stickers on a pokey City Rover car.

    As the traffic was at its usual less than walking pace, I had opportunity to clock the inhabitants of this vehicle and (stereotypical or not) the driver of this tin can was a fugly jabber – and no chicken either judging by the (ample) cleavage wrinkles – and the passenger was a male, I’m guessing early 40’s with the stature of an emaciated Ronny Corbett.

    The sign read as follows: WE’RE EXPECTING!

    Sometimes there is a little too much information in the world (he sudders).

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