The Met Office [2]

metoffice

I would like to nominate the Met Office for a cunting. In January they announced that a new £100m supercomputer would provide the most “accurate forecasts yet” and yet they’re still fucking useless!

If there’s a 3min weather report the cunts spend 2mins of that telling us about the weather we had that day (which they got wrong) followed by tomorrow’s guess (which they’ll get wrong). You might as well just look out of the window or stick a couple of pine cones on your windowsill!

I wouldn’t let the cunts predict their own birthdays they’re that useless!

Nominated by: Rebel without a Cunt!

22 thoughts on “The Met Office [2]

  1. I’m Worried about Trump This is upsetting. How can he blast globalism and Goldman Sachs on the campaign trail, then nominate three of these GS rats to important positions? For the first time, I’m genuinely doubtful about his presidency. I mean, better him than that bossy evil hag Hillary or that lying twat Bernie, but still, this has to stop

    He has been silent on a number of issues which is understandable considering he isn’t even in office yet. Trump will either be remembered as one of the greatest heroes of our people, or one of our most hated traitors. I also think he’ll likely get sniped out from the powers to be maybe not now but possibly in a year or 2 if he goes too much against the grain

    • It was always going to be a contest on a cunt who thought she deserved the presidency, and a cunt who thought he could buy the presidency. 300 million people and those were the only two cunts they could come up with?

    • I have to respect his response to the CIA saying that the Russians hacked and rigged the election results. He said the CIA were the same people who said Iraq had weapons of mass destruction. Game set and match to Don

  2. Playing golf twice a week you really get to know the truth about forecasting and the above cunting is well deserved. In fact the Met office have just lost the BBC contract to Meteo., which is about as humiliating as it gets.
    In my experience ,very few forecasts last beyond a day or two at most yet these overpaid prancing wankers insist on giving you a week ahead, always changing it after 24 hours,so why fucking bother?
    All the gadgets and satellites cannot predict the weather in these islands for long because we are situated between three seas and the continent. I wouldn’t mind so much if they said ,this is our best guess, but they say it as though it’s gospel ,paying for that fat cow Kirkwood [ yes I would of course] to stand waving her norks from the roof of a building in some Scottish shithole.
    Incidentally a fair few of the male weather presenters look as if they take it large up the dungtrumpet and I reckon that if you take the BBC staff as a guide to the country , half of us are black and the other half are arse bandits.
    That should be cunted too!

    • Exactly this! That’s why I was scathing about the fuckers! Useless cunts!

      It’s not also the promise of good weather which turns out to be shit either which annoys. I’m up and down the country like a fiddlers elbow racking up more miles than EasyJet to earn a crust and so – on the very fucking rare occasions when I’m not working of a Saturday and they’re all out – I’ll play a few holes.

      I’m not some silver spoon cunt and I’m a shit golfer but it does help get a shit week out of the system. Unfortunately I’m a bit of a ponce and so I’m a fair weather golfer. On three occasions at least this year Carol in the morning then Tomasczzscz (or whatever the fuck his name is) on the night have basically said: “And it’s a hurricane monsoon forecast tomorrow. I widnae be going oot in that!”

      So I’ve not arranged owt or given up the chance of a knock at good venues based on these lies. Tomorrow comes around and there’s neary a cloud in the sky!

      But then what really sets me off is around 6pm when the: “You missed out on a great day today!” texts start coming in! Fucking met office!

      It’s not like we want to know exactly what’s it’s going to be like for next year’s easter weekend is it! To get a forecast not even 24hrs away so wrong, and with all that fucking technology at your disposal, it’s an absolute fucking disgrace! Cunts!

    • I currently reside in a country where it’s raging hot 360 days and pisssing it down for the other 5. It’s not that hard to predict when it’s going to rain, simply look into the sky and if your eyes are not melted out of your skull then it’s raining. The BBC still manage to fuck it up. The Greeks even have a calendar that predicts the storms to an accuracy of about 48 hours, it’s fucking ancient but still more reliable that the BBC weather app. Yesterday it gave me sunny with 20 degrees and a light wind, when looking out of the window I was greeted with what appeared to be a scene from Flash Gordon, the only thing missing was molten rocks falling from the skies and my house flooded. Useless, overpaid, under skilled sword swallowers.

    • if you watch the beeb’s news channel all the employee fuckers walking around in the background look ethnically british – no idea how many of them are gay tho’

  3. Sorry to do this, all weather forecasters are cunts it is true, often they are as accurate as one of the fraudulent mediums and given as they count Carole “big up my bit” Cuntwood in their number this is a well deserved cunting.

    However the queen of celebrity whoring has just boiled my piss.

    “Madonna says she has been a victim of abuse, bullying, and sexism in her career.”

    Well know narcissist nasty cunt Madonna who is such a fucking diva even the cuntmaster general known as Elton “don’t call me Reg” John called her a cunt in an interview. Is now claiming she has been a victim of bullying, sexism and all the other victim cards she can lay her hands on.

    The only thing bullying you Maddie is age, you’re so far past it you can’t even see the starting line anymore. Makes it difficult to sell your overrated shite music on the back of sexuality does it? You have had a very successful media aided career but the spot lights moved on and no one who matters gives a shit anymore.

    Instead of playing the victim go away and ask yourself why you can’t keep a husband and your son doesn’t want to be around you.

    Madonna fuck off to obscurity and good riddance.

    • Remember when the old trout went jogging in a London park, with her minders shoving people out of her way?
      That’s fucking bullying, you raddled old bag…

      • Remember when the old hag cunt fell off those Stairs into her troupe of poofter satanists LOL LOL LOL.

  4. I would like to nominate bus passengers as a bunch of inconsiderate cunts.

    I get a bus daily, to help the environment but mainly because I like a drink after work. If the bus is busy, what do these twats do? Sit in the aisle seat with no intention of moving over so you have to ask them to move. If you can see it’s getting full, fucking move over, pricks. And take your massive fucking handbags off the seat next to you, you’ve paid for one seat, not both.

    And if you’re an old fucker and turn up at the bus stop just before it arrives, if I’ve been waiting 10 minutes in the pissing cold and rain, I’m getting on first, so stick your misguided entitlement up your cunt, cunts.

    And don’t get me started on the twats who put their feet on the seats, someone should take a shoe covered in dog shite and rub it in their fucking faces.

    • Good cunting mate. Same goes for those cunts on trains who put their fucking bags on the seat, in case God forbid, some poor cunt who doesn’t want to stand all the way from Coventry to Euston, wants to sit down. Really fucking annoying when there is a carriage full of people standing, but some knob-jockey decides his rucksack should get its own seat, (and what the fuck IS IT with men carrying rucksacks to work, buy a proper fucking bag, you cunts, you’re not going on a fucking camping trip!).

    • Don’t forget the loud cunts on phones on public transport as well. Why do they think we are interested in their conversations. It’s a private call so keep,it private you utter cunts.
      Feet on seats fucking piss me right off as well. Many years ago assisted a fellow traveller in removing a cunt from seats as he had his feet up on a rush hour train with next to no space but of course the cunt was entitled to as much room as he wanted. Tried to argue but he was told in no uncertain terms that if he tried it again he would be squashed.

  5. My weather through the summer is usually scorchio and sometimes, mucho cumulus, so i don’t bother with the bullshitters.

    Crees Wadd-el, Crees Wadd-el, Crees Wadd-el dreeb-al

    Aaaah petheth a petheth a pethetheth.

  6. All i will say is Michael Fish ,This bastardo should of been charge with genocide,You all remember what happend,Yes the big storm,The fucking BBC again,They knock a me a fucking sick their cunts.

  7. John Kettely is a weather man, a weather man, a weather man
    John Kettley is a weather man
    And so is Michael Fish.
    ———————————-

    Some cunt made money writing that. And we think modern “music” is shite……….

    • For they know not what they do,Cunts birdman and cunts they a be,The I would rather the weather be read by mason verga,They are cunts,And fucking fred talbots a fine example of what put in front of us on the tv,I give you Michael Fish and Fred Talbot,I rest my case sir.

  8. And any day now the cunts are going to predict a boiling/ flooding make it fucking up as you go along summer in 2017. They base all this on the El nino currents /winds/ bollocks and have NEVER been fucking anywhere near right but that doesn’t stop the cunts .
    They tell me it’s raining and I will go out and check so why pull our national plonker with this pretence that you can actually predict beyond the next two hours you fanny fingering sewage shaggers.

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