Saint Caroline Aherne


Caroline Aherne -or should I say – the canonisation of Caroline Aherne – needs cunting…
Ever since the demise of this person, the revisionism, hype, and treading on eggshells is staggering…

First of all, all this bollocks about her being a ‘comedy genius’… For me comedy genius is Chaplin, Keaton, Hancock, Milligan, Sellers, Barker, Pryor (at his best live)… Comedy genius is not doing a chatshow dressed as a granny or playing a chav who sits on her arse all day… There was no adaptability (like Barker going from Porridge to Open All Hours or Rossiter going from Perrin to Rigsby)… It was always the same thing and voice, just tweaked a little… For imbeciles to go on about Aherne like she was a female Charlie Chaplin is absurd… But that’s the modern Dianafied griefjacking UK for you…

And as for the outcry over Hooky’s recent revelations, it just shows that celebrity is the new religion (with griefjacking at its heart)… Because there are pillocks out there who are acting like Hooky has pissed on a holy shrine… Just like Diana, Jade Goody, Amy Winehouse, or Paedo Jacko… These people seem to be beyond reproach when they snuff it and nobody wants to address the nasty bits and cuntish behaviour… As one of the other Beatles said of Lennon in the 80s, ‘People act now like he was this saint… Like ‘Martin Luther Lennon’, but he wasn’t..’

Peter is now getting all that crap from people who don’t even know what went down… Fuck ’em all, and give them hell, Hooky…

Nominated by: Norman

58 thoughts on “Saint Caroline Aherne

  1. Poor hooky my heart goes out to him,had same problem with my mrs till i beat it with a big fucking stick now eveything is fine thats life.

    • My Cousin’s ex was a psychotic cunt who was abusive and violent… He was/is just a decent and normal bloke, but he fell for this monstrosity of a woman… To all outsiders she would do the ‘holier than thou’ and ‘what a nice woman’ shite… She got found out and chucked out… Last I heard of the bitch (after she’d got out of nick) she was living with some 17 year old smackhead called Michael… That was over 20 year ago, with any luck the evil slag will be dead by now…

      And I hope Hooky gets what the others in New Order owe him too… They’re still good, but not the same without Hooky…

  2. I lived with girl who everyone thought was lovely and great fun in the pub.
    They never saw the psycho bitch feel sorry for herself after a bottle of vodka.
    The last time i saw her was when i was getting in an ambulance after the cunt,bitch,whore,fuckwit had rammed a punt tumbler right into my knee a week before Xmas.
    Five days in hospital, two operations and on crutches for two months.

    When i got out ,every cunt down the local were all having a laugh, egged on by my Da.
    Now I’m not a sensitive cunt but if it had been the other way round i would have been lynched.

    I think the most harrowing thing was trying to walk on crutches in ice and snow. Now that was a laugh……

    • PS. I never even reported the cunt to the cops.
      Just asked my mates to collect my dog and gear and washed my hands of her.
      Could have probably got a claim in…

  3. That cunt Tony Blair needs another cunting double quick now that he’s telling Remain voters to “mobilise against Brexit”. In case he hadn’t noticed, there was a democratic referendum and the result was Leave. Where does this fucking war criminal cunt get off on telling people to reject the outcomes of a democratic vote? First he did it with the Labour Party, telling his disciples to ignore the outcome of the leadership election and overthrow Corbyn, now he’s telling the bitter Remoaners not to accept the result of the referendum.

    Send the cunt to the Hague and then have him shot. Or at least stick him in the cell between Radovan Karadžić and Ratko Mladić.

    • being kicked into a pit of hungry nile crocodiles is the only punishment for arch cunt blair.

    • Saint Blair is of course above democracy so why should he accept stuff he doesn’t agree with despite 17m plus people voting to leave in the biggest democratic exercise we have had in this country.
      Yes, let’s ignore them and do what we want.
      Well cunt, just try it. The poll tax riots of the 80s would be a tea party by comparison.
      These cunts just don’t get it. We are out and are staying out. Now fuck off and die you treacherous bastard.

    • Tony Blair didn’t listen to the people when he depended on their votes for a job, he ain’t going to start now. Miffed he missed out on being EU president in his egotistical mind he probably thinks his global elitist masters will make him world president if he pulled off a Brexit reversal.

      Thingis Tony, people of from all walks of life, beliefs and political persuasions feel about you the same way as they feel about finding dog shit on their shoes.

      Nasty cunt

      • True, he didn’t get the EU presidency that he seemed to think was his birthright.

        They did give him the title of ‘Middle eastern peace envoy’ though.

        Who says that the political class doesn’t have a very dark and cynical sense of humour?

  4. Keith Vaz has apparently been appointed the Justice select committee and the women and equalities select committee .I cant stop laughing.

  5. I know it’s rude to speak ill of the dead but I always found her to be an unfunny cunt.

  6. Talking of a dead bint having great knockers.
    I was watching Sin Cities with Grubb Smith and Ashley Haimes (heroes) and they done a bit about dead pornstars.
    A few were in my top five hundred and now i can’t watch them and knock one out coz it feels creepy knowing they are actually bones and dust.
    Who says wankers are deviant and emotionless…….

      • Don’t be sad Birdman. We all grieve in our own way and I’m sure knocking one out is how they would want to be remembered.

  7. Nissan, in a move which has been years in the planning announced yesterday that they are to increase production at their Sunderland plant thus ensuring 7000 jobs directly and at least as many again in ancillary and supply chain jobs.

    Are the remainiacs relieved? Are they fuck!

    The bellend whiners are demanding to know what “sweetheart deal” has been done by the government. Would these cunts, chief amongst them the ABBC, be the same as those criticizing the government for not doing a sweetheart deal with TATA over their Port Talbot plant?

    You get the distinct impression that these cunts would prefer a scorched Earth policy seeing the UK economy decimated just so they can say “we told you so” before they fuck off to their gite in France. Cunts.

  8. Lily Allen is moaning that a black cab driver refused to give her a lift and said”find an immigrant to drive you you stupid tart”.Someone needs to buy the cabbie in question a beer.

    • What that stupid bitch couldn’t figure out is that the black cab driver in question was a innocent 16 yr old refugee who recently nicked a cab. As he was driving with said stolen vehicle he thought he saw a prostitute and pulled over…. 🙂

    • What is a black cabbie?
      Is it a guy who drives a black cab or a black guy who drives a cab?…….

      • A taxi driver is perfectly within his rights to refuse service.

        Sadly the same cannot be said for bakers, who are obliged by law to bake you what ever cake you want. Even one shaped like a big black cock with cream squirting out the end with “happy 5th birthday” written on it.

  9. well done cabbie,liily the mong should be able to find an immigrant for all sorts of things now as country is going to be flooded with the shit stains,i see tony blair wants a revote on brexit so the people who voted out have a chance to change their minds,i would vote the same again…..the downward spiral cant be much if any worse than the last 5 years….most of which was that ciunts fault anyway……but well done cabbie I would had said something similar myself except stronger language and a slap

  10. lilly the mong was so shocked by being told to fuck off by a cabbie that she didn’t get the number,i reckon the fucking retard is making this up to get her smacked arse face back in the paper,as much as it would have been great I reckon its bollocks and just another desperate ploy to get some sympathy and publicity….even if it didn’t happen you are still a retarded cunt and if it did happen you deserve it with fucking bells on you cunt…..I wish she would fuck off once and for all,,,,,iron clad,weapens grade,heavy duty cunt FFFUUUUCCCCKKKK OOOOFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

  11. St Lily Cunt Allen strikes again

    “Lily Allen said she has had a “glimpse of what it feels like to be discriminated against” after being shunned by a taxi driver.
    The London-born pop star said she was turned away from a black cab after being told to “find an immigrant” to give her and her daughters a ride.
    The alleged interaction between Lily and the unknown taxi driver comes after she apologised “on behalf of my country” after seeing the squalid conditions refugees had lived in at the Calais camp known as the Jungle.
    Lily, 31, wrote on Twitter: “Just tried to get in a black cab with my kids. The driver looked at me and said , ‘find an immigrant to drive you you stupid tart’.”
    She added: “Having lived a life of privilege, that interaction has given me a tiny glimpse of what it feels like to be discriminated against.”

  12. There has to be something wrong in her head.I’m not taking the piss, these are the ramblings of a mad woman.
    I reckon she will be in rehab soon suffering from PTSD.

    It really does prove that they do live in ivory towers if that is her first glimpse of rudeness…..

    Also when the news tell us about the plight of rapeugees in Calais and now Paris they talk about the vulnerability of the women and children from sexual abuse, without mentioning that same threat will be coming to the UK, and that that is one of our main concerns……

    • Mong Features is clutching at straws and is draining every last drop of publicity out of this… I am just sorry the cab driver (if he exists!) didn’t run the gobshite spazmo over…. I dare say it will be discovered that she is bullshitting, and then the windowlicking mong will make up even more bullshiit about her previous bullshit (and get more publicity)… The gurning retarded crone is on the ropes and she knows it… And trying to get sympathy for condoning rapists and terrorists by slurring the English taxi driving profession makes her dirtier than her smelly knickers, which is no mean feat… At this moment in time, Lily Spazmotron is the most punchable person in the world…

      • My mistake… From the paps pics that I’ve seen, Spazmotron doesn’t wear any knickers… She’s always falling over and showing her stinking gash while pissed/coked out of her retarded brain….
        Gasmasks at the ready, chaps…

  13. !!!News just breaking!!!

    That other mad bitch, Killary Kiloton is in trouble with the FBI again, only 10 days before the election.

    FBI Director James Comey says new e-mails have come to light which may be pertinent to the case against The Evil One’s use of a private server for official classified correspondence and the subsequent deletion of 33,000 e-mails from said server. He goes onto say he does not know how long the investigation will take but its a pretty safe bet they will not arrest the lying old cunt before the election. However, being under investigation by the FBI isn’t exactly good for a presidential candidate and will likely sway undecided voters away from the darkness into the light. Hallelujah.

    • Great news, Skidmark… Maybe old Trump has called in a few favours at the FBI…

      More good news today: Poles who want to leave the UK because of Brexit… Ta-ra then, and take all those Romanian, Latvian, Bulgarian and Albanian white wogs with you, please… Ta, muchly….

      • Friday night doesn’t get any better than this! I may guzzle my way through some home brew in a completely irresponsible fashion.

      • And the BBC are talking shite yet again… The fall in the value of the pound means these Iron Curtain White Wogs will send less home, and that’s why they want out.. It is actually very little to do with “hate crime” you BBC cunts….

      • Remember having a chat with some Poles over a drinkie or two. They didn’t want to live permanently in the UK. They just wanted to earn good money to improve their families lives back home until they had enough put by go home and help improve Poland.

        I can live with that…

        • Fair dos… Probably was hard on the Poles… The ones that work aren’t so bad, and it isn’t the Poles that are the worst anyway… The Romanians and Albanians are the main cunts… Fleecing the welfare system and raking it in for every kid they drop, and as long as they are getting a free ride they are never going to leave… OAPs in my area have had trouble with Romanian thieves and most of them have made no attempt to integrate into UK life and society… Some have been here over five years and still don’t know English? A lot of them really take the piss…

        • There’s been Poles in Leicester since the war, social club, church the lot. All spoke English and served the country well. Of the most recent lot, I’ve said before if all the Polish electricians fucked off back to Krakow the lights would go out in Leicester. I’ve not noticed problems with them. However nearly three years ago in Egypt I met some Russians. No wonder the Poles hate them, they are cunts. Poles tell Russian soldier jokes. Like the Russian soldier told to blow up a tank. He burnt his lips on te exhaust pipe. Oh, and Egyptians are cunts too.

          • Those Latvians are cunts too… And the Somalians really are fucking vermin…. I suppose there are younger Poles who are happy to be dole wallahs and breed like rabbits, and give the older generation of Polish a bad name… But most are Romanian and Albanian gyppo cunts who make Papa Lazarou look like David Niven….

          • It’s like drug culture, everyone looks down on the glue sniffer. Even the Pakis hate the Somalians.p

        • The trouble is Dio, they come over here, live 10 to a house, undermine our own workers and send money out of the economy and into the Polish economy. Their kids still cost as much to educate, their health care etc still costs the same.

          That is globalism in action. It doesn’t make the Poles bad people, they are just doing what it takes to improve their lives.

          It I however damaging to all of us locals.

          • Not to mention hardly hearing any English voices – or even the English language – when in town these days, and them being ahead in queues above English taxpayers and pensioners… My sister is a bloody good sewing machinist, and even though she had tons of experience and was the fastest at the trials, she didn’t get the job because she didn’t speak Polish… Bollocks…..

          • Fair comment!
            On the other hand there are lots of bone fucking idle benefit scroungers in this country too fucking lazy to do any real work…

    • Beat me to it, Skid! Was driving home from the office when I heard this on the radio. I laughed all the way home. The Wikileaks guys has issued a statement saying he has more emails to release which will see that bitch arrested.

      The leaks will link collusion, lies, obstruction of justice and bribery with the Obama administration.

      Deep joy!

      This is HUGE. Some high level people are about to be exposed. Don’t stray from your TVs/radios folks. This will be great!

    • You can bet Mr Trump has had his people working on this for weeks. While she’s been wheeling on a bunch of demented women Donald has been digging up some serious shit that he’ll use to bury the witch forever.

  14. How long does it take to investigate emails?
    It is written word , so get it done tonight and decide if she is fucked or not……….

  15. I’ve just seen an African rapeugee on the news being prompted to say he was tortured.
    When asked what happened to him, he said he was beaten and kicked. I’ve had that off the pigs many a time….

    • I think it was mental rather than physical torture because they promised him an iPhone 7 and they gave him a Samsung S6 instead.

      All these children, all so poor, hungry and desperate to get to Fantasy Island… … … …

      If I was so poor, hungry and desperate then I reckon the £600 quid iPhone, £100 quid North Face jacket and £80 quid Timberlands could get you a warm gaff for a month or so, or even better, a one way ticket back to Lagos or Nairobi or whatever other safe African country you ran away from because you’re either a) a felon, or b) a 40yr old lazy idle cunt-sack who wants to hook up with some heinous 58yr divorcee and milk the cunt dry before moving onto the next one, and the next, and the next…

      Either way, you’re not wanted here, you cunts!

  16. Saitn Caroline Aherne would probably still be alive if she had not created the Royale Family, cause in every fucking scene she was filmed in for that show she had a fucking cigarette in her gob

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