I know that loathsome professional Essex Lad Phill Jupitus (born Phillip Swan on the Isle of Wight) has been cunted several times before, but I recently heard him mention that he has a wife.

Anyone who would want to marry such a fat, hateful, talentless cunt is surely even more of a cunt than he is, and so I hereby nominate Phill Jupitus’s wife.

Nominated by: Fred West