First nom.

Despite millions of pounds from the national lottery being pumped into the system to supposedly create opportunities for all to achieve and live their sporting dreams one thing never seems to change and that is if the event requires more than a pair of trainers, boxing gloves or a swimming costume the names of the participants reveals that fuck all has changed over the last 25 years of spunking cash into the system.

A quick glance at our medallists reveals that Yasmin and Scarlett did quite well at diving, Rosalind, Laura, Charlotte, and Becky stood on the podium for riding horses and Lola, Georgina, Lauren, Hannah,Emily and Imogen are decent rowers. i could go on but you get the picture, link here

olympics.com

The men are slightly harder to spot but there’s Ethan, Jake, Toby, Hamish and Oliver to be relied upon when the chips are going South.

Now, when most people think of the Olympics they think of athletics in a stadium packed with people running, jumping and throwing, and for good reason because that’s what people want to see, requires physical exertion and everyone did it at school so we have a point of reference. Everyone has a chance and if you’re talented you will get noticed and be picked for the school team, then county and national events for the very best out there.
That’s why working class scrappers like Steve Ovett, Steve Cram, Linford Christie, Sharron Davies, Duncan Goodhew, Audley Harrison,Fatima Whitbread and Kris Akabusi to name but a few could make it to the top from humble backgrounds because it cost fuck all to get started, Our only gold medal in track and field in Paris came from a lass called Keely from Wigan.

Anything involving animals or equipment means most oiks are fucked immediately. Imagine the blank faces of staff at the local council run pool when Leanne or Conner rock up say they quite fancy a shot at synchronised swimming or springboard diving. The inflatables are out at 3pm though so that’ll do.
Fair play to all those that won medals but being the best of the moneyed elite in dressage doesn’t compare to the track where a peasant from Ethiopia can become a legend. Never mind, keep playing the fucking lottery, What a cunt.

Nominated by Davemacc.

Welcome aboard Sir a fine cunting. C.A.

A “dem bones, dem bones, dem dry bones” cunting (now here de word of de Lord) for her Ladyship, who has got herself yet another front page splash by pleading victimhood.

When young Steve bought it 31 years ago, Mr & Mrs (as she then was and should still be) decided to have him entombed in Africa. Well thirty years after he has been mouldering in the grave her Ladfyship decided he should be returned to the U.K. He has been exhumed but Dame Doreen isn’t happy – because the story has leaked out on social media. She is also unhappy because the company given the honour of digging him up didn’;t guard the site of the tomb.

As she made an extraordinary decision three decades on, she might have expected that comment would be made. Is she after a freebie, a state funeral or perhaps she just wanted to make the tear-stained announcement herself. It’s all about me, honey child!.

There is no pleasing this old darkie, but why the fuck was she given a titel in the first place?. She is as thick as Angela Rayner, and not that many years ago both of them would have been lucky to have got a job in the Commons as a lavatory attendant.

You and me, we sweat and strain……….

BBC News.

Nominated by : W. C. Boggs

Seconded by : OpinionatedCunt

Here’s a Daily Fail link from 2012 where his grave is clearly shown in multiple images – no wailing from her then as far as I know. Indeed, it was filmed as part of the Panorama documentary at the time.

Daily Fail.

And a judicial review from Imitation Yank with this:

Seconded (again).

I’d forgotten about this old hag, but looked up her deets on Wiki. Well, well, well…lookie here.

Occupation cited as Campaigner. Is that actually a thing?. In 2003, she was appointed OBE for services to community relations. Well done. She founded the Stephen Lawrence Charitable Trust to promote a positive community legacy in her son’s name. OK, fair enough. She’s also been selected to sit on panels within the Home Office and the police, and she is a member of both the board and the council of Liberty, the human rights organisation, as well as being a patron of hate crime charity Stop Hate UK. All very virtuous I’m sure. A fine upstanding member of the communidee.

But wait…..there’s more….to directly quote from the Wiki page:

In October 2019, Lawrence attracted criticism for her on-camera remarks concerning the Grenfell Tower fire tragedy made during an interview with Channel 4 News. She was quoted as saying: “Had that been a block full of white people in there, they would have done everything to get them out as fast as possible and make sure that they do what they needed to do.” A public petition was raised demanding an apology. She later apologised for her remarks.

Racist much? But I guess it’s OK when they do it, right? And note, her apology wasn’t made until AFTER the public petition was raised. Does that constitute a genuine and heartfelt apology then? Why wasn’t that grounds to strip the bitch of her OBE?

Wikipedia.

Discuss.

someone needs to show these fools what policing actually means.

After a week, more or less, of civil unrest ( fucking idiots using any excuse for a rammy), I’m just waiting for the 10pm – 7am curfew. I’ll be astonished if it doesn’t happen.

wetbridgfordwire

Here’s a police force who are actually doing the job they signed up for, policing!

More power to your elbows, my dears. I just wish we had more of you.
Proper coppers!

Nominated by Jeezum Priest.

I got home the other day to find the wife in a swoon on the sofa. After administering smelling salts, she managed to tell me that she’d fainted away while listening to a song by somebody called Lyrica Anderson, which contained such unspeakable smut as ‘suck this pussy through these panties yeah, ah got a kitty shaved for you bae’. I had to put her to bed with a glass of warm milk, and she’s still in a state of considerable nervous agitation.

Sadly such vileness is a symptom of the degeneracy of modern society, along with mobile phones, drugs, trainers and fast food. I first became aware of this phenomenon back in the 80s, with Frankie Goes To Hollywood’s horrible ‘Relax’ *shudder*, and the likes of ‘relax, don’t do it, when you wanna come, but shoot it in the right direction’. Utterly appalling.

It’s nothing new of course. I mean, take this revolting example from the 40s;

You could be forgiven for thinking that smutty lyrics are a symptom of post war moral decline, along with teenage sex, teddy boys and rock n’ roll, but you’d be wrong. I mean, just have a listen to these examples from the 30s;

If this doesn’t make you want to vomit nothing will. This stuff’s been around since people began writing songs. We are lost in a stinking sewer of moral turpitude. If Mary Whitehouse was alive, she’d be turning in her grave.

youtube

youtube

youtube

Nominated by Ron Knee.

The domestic footy season ended some weeks ago, and since then, the meeja has gone into its usual feeding frenzy regarding transfer speculation and rumours. Yes, the transfer window has been ‘thrown open’ once more.

It’s that time of the year for clubs to ‘weigh their options’, and consider ‘preparing a bid’ for the latest ‘ace’ from wherever. ‘War chests’ are ‘prised open’. Melchester Untied and Littleplop get into a ‘bidding war’ for South American teenage sensation Juan Orranutha, but he ‘snubs’ them to ‘push through his dream move’ to Spanish ‘giants’ Unreal Pimpleona.

Meanwhile Aston Bungalow is ‘monitoring the situation’ of Tittingham Hotspud’s Korean ‘misfit’ Whun Hung Lo, who’s been ‘frozen out’ at White Dogshite Lane. Lo has issued a ‘come and get me’ plea to the Midlands ‘powerhouse’, in an attempt to ‘end his Spuds nightmare’. Hotspuds fans are sending out ‘I’ll drive him there myself’ messages on soshull meeja.

Elsewhere, ‘minnows’ Cunthorpe United have issued a ‘hands off warning’ to Chuntsea regarding ‘wonderkid’ Mumbo N’jumbo, stating angrily that an offer from the Londoners was ‘derisory and insulting’. Chuntsea insists that it ‘won’t be held to ransom’ by the Cunts, but is aware that Muntchester City is ‘on red alert’ and ‘looking to hijack’ the deal.

And so it goes on. In spite of clubs ‘looking to get their business done early’, with talks being at a ‘preliminary’ or ‘advanced’ stage and bids ‘lodged’ or ‘tabled’, things will reach an ‘impasse’, or ‘break down’, or go ‘into limbo’. As deadline day approaches, there’ll be a scramble to ‘get deals over the line’. Players joining a new club will be ‘unveiled’ holding up a shirt or a scarf in front of the cameras, burbling on about how ‘it’s always been my ambition to join the club I supported as a kid’.

Then suddenly, the window ‘slams shut’, and won’t re-open until January, when clubs will once more attempt to ‘bolster’ their squads. Oh well, it all helps to keep footy fans occupied during the dog days of summer, when besides the cricket, golf, racing, tennis and the Olympics, there’s little else to offer by way of a sporting diversion.

The Sun.

Nominated by : Ron Knee