Ant and Dec [5]


A quick ‘it’s a fix’ cunting for those two charmless, gurning wankers Ant ‘Half Man, Half Klingon’ McPartlin and his sidekick ‘Diddy’ Declan Donnelly.

The Gruesome Twosome have been voted ‘Best Presenters’ for something like the hundredth time in a row at this year’s National TV Awards, casting doubt on the veracity of the result. Either that, or the opposition must truly be absolute dogshit.

Apparently the pair teased the audience that they might retire to give somebody else a chance to win. Oh bring it on, as of yesterday. What’s the difference between Ant and Dec and a pencil? The pencil’s got a point to it.

Daily Record.

Nominated by : Ron Knee

With supporting evidence provided by Chuff Chugger:

Ron…….these were the nominees if it helps your nom?
Alison Hammond
Ant & Dec [WINNER]
Bradley Walsh
Claudia Winkleman
Stacey Solomon

77 thoughts on “Ant and Dec [5]

  1. The wife’s just told me her Ant and Dec joke again. Ready?

    What’s the difference between Katie Price’s front and Ant and Dec?

    Ant and Dec are a couple of real tits.

    Go on, have a laugh. You know you’re dying to.

  2. A half bald cunt and a little arsehole, used in the porn industry as the name of a pose, Allright love lets finish with an Ant and Dec lovely. Pair of annoying knob headed twats who should do the decent thing and fuck off to Gaza or some other fun filled shite hole.

  3. Cunt though he could be, John Lennon was spot on in 1970.
    When he sang ‘Keep you doped with religion and sex and TV.’

    These Easter Island headed vacuous cunts Ant and Dec are a form of opiate for British chav scum. Taking these gurning Mekon heads off our screens would be like ruthlessly snatching a baby’s bottle. Junk TV is like junk food. Mostly shite, but scum love it.

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