I’d like to make a nom for yampy brain dead fuckwits who can’t drive,was out driving ,keeping myself to myself as always,when some prick drove past shouting shit ,dumb fucks like this are the kind who could cause a crash and what they did was downright stupid and dangerous to anyone on the road.
It takes in my opinion intelligence to drive well and clearly their actions displayed they had none ,if it wasn’t me it could have been some newbie who just passed driving test or sumet, morons like this shouldn’t be on a fucking road full stop.
Nominated by Mind you own business you nosy bastard.
I’m a brilliant driver.
Surprised I’ve not been asked to chaffeur royalty to be honest?
I’m that good I can listen to Metallica, text my mate funny pictures, drink Bovril whilst doing 70mph!
An they say men can’t multi task🖕
11
Morning mis, or is it Henri Paul?
7
Only 70? Ooh, hello sailor…unless you’re doing 70 in a 30.
Or past a mōsque.
6
Ooh no, Mr Cuntengine!!
I’d rather cut my fuckin leg off than break the law by speeding!
I’m nothing if not responsible towards fellow road users😁
5
Listening to RATM and masturbating whilst doing 130mph on the hard shoulder as all the other gimps queue up for an “accident” does it for me…….
2
Every time I drive down the street I see someone in a car doing something stupid. But then I see cyclists and pedestrians doing stupid things too. There are fucking idiots everywhere.
19
Why do pedestrians stepping straight into the road think texting on a phone will prevent them from being run over?
16
It’s like a game, they just lose a life.
3
Have you ever noticed that everyone who drives slower than you is a moron and everybody who drives faster than you is a maniac?
– George Carlin
16
List of people who should have their right to drive rescinded forthwith:
1) Wimmin (until they take an extended driving test and don’t then drive anything larger than a Fiesta
2) Chınks/old farts…just do more than 20 mph, for fuck’s sake
3) Pakıs…to save young girls from being interfered with
4) Blacks…extended driving test to prove an IQ of over 30 and provide evidence of opposable thumbs
5) Iron curtain dooshkas…just get some bloody insurance for once
6) Just…fucking everyone else!
Extended retests every five years for everyone. I have no problem doing a couple of lessons to iron out any long standing driving peculiarities.
10
Can I add to your list Thomas ?
Suggest classic car drivers, particularly those that drive old Austin’s with square steering wheels.
9
Yampy, there’s a good brummy word.
5
Top of my bad fucking driver’s is.
Muslim women
No wonder the bastard’s are reluctant to let them drive in their own countries.
Fucking death wish 21st century….💀
12
They probably can’t see where they’re going with all that garb on, the giving-birth-to-terrorists bitches.
9
I’m not allowed to wear a crash helmet when driving, due to it obscuring my peripheral vision, apparently.
SO how come they’re allowed to wear a letterbox?
5
I didn’t know that one Cuntzilla, but I’ve often thought this fashion for spectacles with side frames ¾” wide is silly in day to day life and dangerous when driving. For that reason I always wear spectacles with thin wire side frames mounted high up beside the lenses.
1
asians in nissans are best avoided….as are blicks…particularly the women in toyotas and the men in rough bmw’s.
none can fucking drive…….or fucking park. cunts
10
I always avoid asians, CC.
But I would shag Jameela Jamil. She’d be so traumatised by her ordeal that her skin’d turn white with shock.
6
For the benefit of balance, i have always had a bit of a ‘hard’ spot for anita rani (lovely voice as well) and that pussycat doll bird that closet puff lewis hamilton pretended to have sex with.
Lovely..both of them.
8
Chinkys.
Everyone of them a terrible driver.
They should be registered blind really the squinting little yellow cunts
And africunts
While back on morning passed one doing 40mph in the middle lane of the M56.
The look of concentration on her face was comical!
I cheerfully beeped my horn repeatedly while shouting
” You chimp cunt!”
11
https://youtu.be/PQ-L2iXajSY
4
Was that gary Lineker off to collect the award from amnesty International?
6
I was hoping that Linekunt and Branston might have been in that submersible. Sinkable, more like. As Nan would say, What a load of shit. Reckon the noises are the sad but inevitable farts of doom…
0
Anyone else play ‘ who is driving that car’ as you approach them on the motorway?
I’m very often right with my prejudice, it’s like a sixth sense, how did I know it was a woman for instance?
10
Probably hogging the first overtaking lane, when they do change lanes they dont indicate and when approaching every junction they keep dabbing the brakes for half a mile leading up to it just in case its the exit they want….because they havent even had a cursory glance at a map prior to commencing an unknown journey prior to leaving and are therefore spending more time with their eyes looking at their phones satnav rather than the road. Oh….and the phone will be stuck to ther windscreen right in their sightline.
7
Middle lane doing 55mph, big mumma straightening her ill-fitting wig.
4
Or having a dump in the glove box….
0
Yeah it’s amazing how accurate my gender/age/race profiling of shit drivers is as I overtake the twat, glance to my left, look back ahead and say to myself “a middle-aged, white woman yapping on her phone…. FUCKING CALLED IT!”.
I’ve had a theory for years that the reason there are so many bad female drivers on the road is because they give head for a pass. Simple way to solve this issue is to installed tamper-proof audio visual equipment in all test instructor cars so that no deal can even be suggested and women would have to get a pass based on merit.
5
If I were an examiner I would put up with a load of stupid women drivers on the road if it meant a never ending conveyor belt of filthy blowjobs in return for a licence.
Mercenary..that’s me
6
I was driving in central London one day and the guy beside me was of West Indian heritage. A car in front performed a ridiculous and dangerous manoeuvre and my passengers instant response was “That will be an African woman!” When we pulled alongside said car a minute later he looked across to the black woman driver and said “Told you so, African!”I don’t know how he knew this, they all look the same to me and I hadn’t the nerve to ask.
4
Is the driver in the header picture getting his nob polished by Divine Brown??
3
It was simply a moment of madness lol
2
Cunts who wear basebal caps/trilbys whilst driving. 😁
4
Trilby!!! Top hats are a cunt.
2
Bottle-blonde wimmin in Range Rovers/Evoques wearing shades, trying to look oh-so-cool whilst attempting to drive and against all their might, cannot keep their fucking tank on the left hand side of the road centreline.
CUUUUUNTS!
9
Katie Price is a prime example of an organ donor.
0
Diversity is always the worst at driving. Fact.
Where I’m originally from in the Midlands, it’s like trying to navigate central Islamabad during prayer hour – can’t move for Abdul or Mtembe doing something monumentally spastic behind the wheel of a car.
Dame Louise Hamilton forgets the only reason that he’s in F1 is because his ma’s white. Were he 100% Sam Beau, he’d not be allowed within a six-mile radius of a Formula 1 car. Why? Because they’re not very good at driving. Or STEM subjects, which – by the way – is why they’re “under-represented” in motorsport.
And why do our chocolate-faced friends always drive Toyotas?
Toyota is one of the most exciting car brands around at the moment. Their chairman, a gentleman named Akio Toyoda, has given a massive oriental “fuck you” to the Greta/eco/EV lobby by calling it out for the bullshit it is. Oh, and don’t get me started on how excellent the GR Yaris is.
It’s giving Toyota a bad name, is diversity.
8
In fact, my other half’s Lithuanian…
Cracking lad and all that, but in the five years we’ve been together, I’ve never seen him drive, despite him claiming he has a driving licence.
Oh well, I’m fine with doing all the driving. Given how many world championship-winning racing drivers our fair nation has produced over the decades, the odds are stacked in my favour at being better at it, anyway.
6
Afternoon C_C, my company has been testing and upgrading a GR Yaris recently, absolutely fantastic car.
Shame the GR Corolla isn’t coming over here.
Today though, I’m working on an Alfa Giulia Quadrifoglio, it’s bloody well fast! Pulls like Ted Danson in the 1980s.
6
Greetings, TtCE!
Absolutely fantastic, are the GR Yari. Unfortunately, the world dealt me a bit of a naff hand in relation to business earlier this year, so I’ve had to put my plans on getting a (second hand) one on hold for a bit.
I’m still bloody determined to have one outside our dry stone walls, but only after the first few pay checks from the replacement client have cleared and going out and buying something stupid and expensive doesn’t have too much of a risk attached to it.
GR Corolla? Yes, please! It’d put Volkswagen out of business overnight with their hideous Mk.8 Golf, wouldn’t it?
3
I’ve always said that you only need to have one good day to get a licence for the next 50 years
So much evidence on the roads of people falling into that category
5
Yep. I’m an excellent driver and a keen car enthusiast, so naturally I passed first time when I was 21.
I am definitely not 21 anymore as my knees and gout and knackered eyes will tell you.
If I had to pass my test again, I reckon I’d struggle along with the majority of licence holders in this country. Wouldn’t you?
2
I’d retake my test in my rusty as fuck mk2 Cortina. The examiner would be so scared of the brakes failing or something similar that he’d pass me asap just to get out of the car.
5
You’ll never pass Tommy, not Abdul enough
4
I wouldn’t worry about bad driving if I were you. They’ll soon have you fucking peasants off the road so it won’t be your problem. You will own nothing and be happy.
9
…you’ve gotta do the accent Fred…
“Yoooooo vill own nosssink und yoo veel be heppy” sort of thing.
2
Problem is that so many people are on the road to whom driving does not come naturally and they have no interest or inclination in improving their skills. This will not change because “the great car economy” (© Margaret Thatcher) is dependent on most people driving. The upside is that it is a major factor in the impending demise of the electric car scam as the cost would push many people off the road. Older cunters will remember politicians talking openly in the 1960s of pricing the private motorist off the road. They soon backed down when they realised that the cost in votes could lose them their place at the trough.
3
A superb cunting. Plenty of things steam my piss on the roads…
Drivers who can’t keep a steady speed on an open & quiet stretch of road.
Cunts on mobiles whilst driving.
Old doddery grave dodgers causing mayhem (but denying everything).
People who bought their licences rather than passing their test.
Jacinta types who never say thanks when they’re being let out of a side road (too busy in meeting Jocasta at the arf-arf salon to get their shitholes bleached and their nails painted).
Bastard cunt lycra-clad cunts on bikes who need a meeting with a 9mm & the oven.
Mad arsed fucking boy racer latch-key kid cunts who go tear-arsing through 30mph areas like a hornet with its arse on fire.
Fucking cunt tailgaters. You’re not Mad Max…you’re just a doss cunt.
Arsehole Audi & BMW drivers who think they invented driving (with no indicators).
School run mums who insist on driving their old man’s cock extension to the school gates when they live 80 yards away from the school.
Cunts who don’t signal when switching lanes on the motorway.
Drink & drug drivers (scumcunts).
The list goes on in the sad state of our modern roads. Fucks sake.
2