The Scottish National Party

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Well hoots mon and he’p ma boab. What a bunch of sleazy cunts the SNP are slowly but surely proving themselves to be.

They’ve had a foot on the throat of the Parliament and the people of Scotland for years now, and finally, their chickens are coming home to roost. The education system and the NHS are on life support. The ferries debacle and the failure of the promise to ‘dual’ the A9 are but the tip of an iceburg of incompetence. The ludicrous Gender Recognition Reform Bill proved to be about as popular as a floater in a swimming pool. Climate change and cancer treatment targets, plus a host of others, haven’t been met. Scots pay more tax than any other part of the UK.The list just goes on…

Meanwhile the party, once the most ruthless and feared election machine in the country, has ignominiously collapsed in on itself. Westminster party leader Ian ‘Bloater’ Blackford chucked in the towel a while ago to spend more time with his steak pies. After claiming to have ‘plenty left in the tank’, Nicola ‘Legohead’ Sturgeon decided suddenly, and somewhat mysteriously, to quit as First Minister.
Equally mysteriously, she was quickly followed out the door by husband Peter Murrell, who amid accusations of vote-rigging, secrecy and deception, resigned as the party’s Chief Executive five minutes before being booted. All this while the scuffers investigate *ahem* possible ‘financial improprieties’ re. party funds, and membership numbers crash through the floor.

So now the people o’ bawnie Scortlund await with weary resignation to learn which of the three plankish candidates for First Minister will emerge victorious to lead the nation into the sunlit uplands of independence. Will it be one of the non-entities Ash Regan or Kate Forbes, or will it be bookies’ favourite Humza ‘what we can all learn from the Quran’ Yousaf? I’m on the edge of my fucking seat here.

The SNP is a disgraceful shambles, as is the state of governance in Scotland, and excuses such as ‘we’ve had the Covid crisis’ or ‘it’s all Westminster’s fault’ won’t wash anymore. Nope, it’s the fault of all the brainwashed cult members who keep voting for these cunts. Time for the people of Scotland themselves to do something about it.

Scottish Sun

Nominated by Ron Knee.

94 thoughts on “The Scottish National Party”

  1. Well crafted Ron.

    Dug up Krankies garden…looking for £600,000 perhaps?

    Or the laptop hard drive with the lesbian fisting home movies?

    Who can say?

    Fuck the mental incompetent cunts into the nearest loch.

  2. The Scottish would be better off with nessie in charge of the country.

    And Nessie is more believable than krankie is as a heterosexual.

  3. It couldn’t happen to s nicer bunch of cunts.
    Just sit back and enjoy as the full story emerges.

  4. Krankie went because she knew the game was up.
    Her husband’s misappropriation of party funds.
    The SNP are toast.
    Or should that be brown bread?

  5. Top cunting Ron.

    Humza Useless failed at every position he has held and is the architect of a lot of their failed policies from record drug deaths, lowering of life expectancy, NHS waiting times and his insidious Stasi-like Hate Crime Bill.

    If there was any justice in the world, McKrankie and her husband would be banged up and sharing a cell with Isla Bryson.

    • Amazing isn’t it, LL and good afternoon.
      A carpet rider head of Scotchland and London and a Ding Ding for PM.
      If someone would’ve predicted that 20 years ago, you and I would have laughed in their faces.
      And now here we are.
      Surprised they haven’t petitioned to have a brown turdlike smear added to
      🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 or 🇬🇧

      • Afternoon Mr Cunt Engine.

        That’s the one thing the Tories have over Labour, an ethnic PM and past and present Home Secretary, Health Secretary and chancellor whilst they have had none.

        I’d imagine the wine circles of Islington would be like the official in the South African embassy when Danny Glover says he wants to emigrate to South Africa in Lethal Weapon if they ever elected a minority as party leader….”But…but…you’re black!”

  6. Like our politicians/cunts or the sheep shaggers ones are any better.
    Ministerial salary is £84k and all these liars and charlatans are multi-millionaires?
    They’re bought and paid for by lobbyists / banks / corporations, every one, and ought to executed for treason.

    • I’ve long held the suspicion that ex politicians are involved in money laundering.

      You hear of them getting a few hundred grand for a short speech. It stinks to high heaven.

      I reckon that’s their pay off for scratching the right backs when in power. Blair gets about 200k per speech.

      Why would any cunt pay him that, unless there’s something in it for him?

      Allegedly and all that, but it smells worse than Daniella Westbrook’s fetid minge.

  7. She says she’s her resignation was nothing to do with this investigation which she didn’t even know was coming.

    You’d have to be a right fucking thick cunt to buy that bollocks.

    SNP is not anyone but the English, it’s everyone but the English.

    It is sad, because I will miss the pasty, unhealthy, red haired alcoholic gentleman, swinging his large bottle of Bells about, threatening to headbutt everyone, while shouting in his unintelligible Glaswegian accent.

    • Afternoon CB.
      Isn’t that everyone north of Carlisle, both male and (nominally) female?
      It also sounds rather like our departed Fiddler.

      • Well if he’s a jock maybe he snuffed it?

        His posts seem to show he was in his 40s perhaps?

        That would make him one of the oldest people in Scotland’s entire history. The Queen sends telegrams to Scottish people when they reach 30.

        25 is Scottish retirement pension age.

      • Need to have a job to retire, CB.
        And I don’t think alcoholism is a career.

  8. A posh £110,000 motor home has been seized by the police in part of Scotgate investigation.

    Well that’s part of the missing £600,000 just £490,000 to go 😂

  9. Off topic, but Crystal Palace are 5-1 up at Leeds. Under Vieira they hadn’t won in months.

    Interesting they’re winning now the new boss has put a few honkies in the team (it was spot the whitey under Vieira.)

    • Can’t believe that the Villa are up to 6th! The players will need altitude conditioning if they keep this up.

      Nice to see Prince Wills down at the Park following his chosen team yesterday. The world’s highest profile celebrity fan lol!

      • Didn’t “Dave” Cameron say he supported Villa Park Aston United? Probably see him at every game…..

    • Black players are very useful footballers, but I just don’t think you’d get a black Martin Oerdegaard or a black Kevin De Bruyne.

  10. An excellent cunting Ron.

    The SNP is no more than a single-issue pressure group pretending to be a political party. They simply operate by shovelling loads of free shit (paid for by English and ‘rich’ Scottish taxpayers) the way of the dim-witted Scottish voter. The result is a corrupt, incompetent, authoritarian one-party state, and a country going down the shitter. Thankfully that party is now melting faster than a Mars bar in a deep-fat fryer.

    The roots of corruption run deep though. It’s 6 years years since this money was raised, and 3 years since questions were being asked on social media about it. And until now, the supine MSM have done absolutely no digging whatsoever. There is also no doubt that the Polis tipped off Krankie that this was coming, and held off long enough for her to install her Continuity Crackpot candidate. She’s also had plenty of time to delete emails and texts and destroy documents, so sadly she won’t be getting banged up in Corton Vale with ‘Isla Bryson’ for a cell mate. The ‘husband’ will take the rap instead.

    Just in the last couple of days we’ve had the SNP’s auditors resign, Krankie’s mother-in-law’s £110,000 motorhome seized by the Polis, and now Bungdit Din is going to sue the UK Govt over the veto of the ‘Put Male Rapists in Women’s Prisons Bill’. So this fuckwit who couldn’t sue a nursery (over racism, naturally) is going to blow money he doesn’t have on a case he can’t win, lose the SNP more members and alienate more Scots. Keep up the good work, Bungdit Din, you fucking numptie.

    As for Empress Krankie, haste ye back, Kranks – to the depths of Loch Ness from whence you emerged, and take that ugly French lezza with you. What a glorious legacy you leave.

    • That’s poetry that.
      I never thought a Geordie could fly so high, gan canny like.

      • You’re too kind, Harry.
        I have Scottish ancestry (including my mother) and I lived and worked in Scotland in the 1990s, so I’m more Scottish than Bungdit Din and I’ve contributed more to the Scottish economy than that cunt ever will. That’s why I’m so angry at what these corrupt bastards have done to Scotland.
        Ron’s mentioned several examples of their incompetence, but here’s just one other – Scottish education has fallen from 4th to 38th in international rankings under the SNP, who tried to hide the figures. And all this incompetent shit happens because they waste their efforts on ‘Indyref2’ and ignore the day job. An utter shower of cunts.

      • Thank you Arfur.

        I might add that the Polis tent on the front lawn, going through the bins and bbq, digging up the lawn etc looks like pure theatre to me. Of course I may be wrong, but I don’t believe they’ll pin anything on Krankie and they know it. The whole charade smells fishier than Peterhead harbour.

      • The police were going through the bins looking for a meal, a takeaway is a luxury in Scotland.

      • I fear that you’ll prove to be correct Arfur. It all looks like a complete charade.

        Police Scotland will say that they’ve gone through the whole works like a dose of salts, and everyone’s come out Persil white.

        You can smell the stench from here.

  11. Perhaps Sturgeon will come out as a woman, so she doesn’t have to go to a men’s prison.
    Also, her husband looks like when Catherine Tate used to dress up as that bald bloke for her show.
    How very dare you….

  12. £600,000 isn’t worth the jail time. Small minded politics and small minded fraud, if it’s true.

    Scottish Nasty Useless Party, that’s true, all day long.

      • Who buys a motor home ?
        A gold plated cunt.
        With the Krankie bros it’s all B.O.G.O.F

      • A camper van full of misappropriated party funds, heading for the Highlands, pursued by the Rainbow police Scotland, O.J Simpson style-whilst Krankie leans out of the passenger window, screaming “FREEDOM!”-what a glorious sight that would have made😀👍

  13. Why can’t the SNP have someone normal in the driving seat?

    Wee Nicky and her gypsy fingered hubby who looks like Donald Pleasence.

    Now some accident prone Bollywood Mr Bean.

    They’re a shower of shite.

    Although all political parties struggle to find a decent leader to be fair.

    • Behind the wheel they have had Maureen and now a have a unlicensed mini cab driver, mis.

      Their insurance premiums are through the roof. Maybe that’s what the 600,000 pounds were for.

      • Maybe Baz?

        £600,000 isn’t easy to misplace, you’d remember withdrawing it wouldn’t you?!

        Awful lot of shortbread that’d buy.
        Oots Mon.

  15. Two women shared a cell for five years and were released from prison on the same day.
    When they were freed, they spent another two hours talking outside….

  16. Fuck em, Scotland wants to live in a socialist tyranny they can expect more of this.

  18. Douglas Ross the Scottish CONSERVATIVE leader has suggested people vote for Labour! Stupid cunt: Vote SNP get a Paki leader, vote Labour get a Paki leader who believes in gender benderism.

  21. Thanks to everyone making complimentary comments about the nom.

    This whole thing to me (with my Scottish ‘connection’) is totally fascinating. It’s been clear for years that the SNP is utterly incompetent, but it’s been sustained by a voter base that actually couldn’t give a fuck. The bagpipes, tartan and misty mountains brigade will vote for a haggis if it’s got an SNP rosette on it. Indy is all, and they’ll worry about the rest later.

    Now however sleaze is thrown into the mix. Two big issues at the moment as I see it. Where’s the money gone, and who knew what when. It’s going to be good fun watching Humza Useless trying to duck and weave, because he hasn’t got an pinch of Legohead’s nous. He’s been a miserable failure in every government post he’s held. Rather than trying to run Scotland, I’d suggest that he sticks to what he does best, except that I haven’t got a scooby what that actually is.

    So now Wee Jimmy’s out, we’ve got what appears to be a personality cult looking for a personality. What a bunch of absolute cunts.

    • ‘…Rather than trying to run Scotland, I’d suggest that he sticks to what he does best, except that I haven’t got a scooby what that actually is…’

      If you ever do find out, please let us all up here know, as it’s a complete fucking mystery to everyone why he keeps getting jobs….it’s like some sort of big fairy story with him as the unlikely star…

      Useless cunt couldn’t even follow through on the real ‘macho’ act of suing that bloody nursery.

      • Well I believe that he worked in an O2 call centre before he got into politics career wise.

        Maybe he could go back to that, if they’d have him.

  22. It’s absolutely wonderful.
    Like watching a slow-motion car crash.
    You know what the end result will be, but you just can’t stop watching.

    I predict a whitewash, but the smell of shit will linger.

  24. My view from the states is that this is simply a matter of diversity and inclusion. I’m betting the Scots will choose diversity and vote to include Mr. Yousaf of the McPaki clan from the Highland region of Punjab as their leader.

    Next up…the O’Sikh’s of Ireland.

    Diversity is our farce.

    As usual another righteous cunting from the illustrious Mr. Knee.

      • The Donald is very proud of his Scottish heritage General. He gets it form his mother.

        You must be pissed (in Britain we say pissed off) about his indictment.

        Or maybe not.

        Do you see it as an advantageous thing for his presidential ambitions?

      • Oh yes. Orange Man will win in 2024.

        His poll ratings are going through the roof.

      • Well at least he is proud of it.

        Sleepy Joe’s corpse of a mother slept on the floor rather than the bed the queen residing in.

        Plastic paddy cunt.

      • Very true CG.

        He’s a liar. Just a recent one-said he went to a black church service after he went to mass on a Sunday.

        Oh yeah right. You just just know he has made that up to get votes.

        I really dislike him.

    • Hey General if you’re around there is this aisan Vivek Ramaswamy who is going for the Presidency.

      If he wins that will mean there is an aisan Potus aisan pm of UK aisan first minister of Scotland and an aisan pm of Ireland Varadkar.

      • Another thing comes to mind. The moves to impeach Biden seems to be gaining ground. From my reading.

        Bloody hell we might have two ex presidents in jail soon.

        Or running their campaigns from a jailhouse.

      • ‘Plastic paddy cunt.’

        He’s in Northern Ireland now isn’t he.

        He’s going to give a speech.
        No doubt he will fuck it up.

        I am from Irish stock. Everything about him is NOT Irish .

        Can’t explain.

      • I can Miles:

        The Irish have “soul”.
        Poverty and hardship gives birth to poetry, music and literature.

        Biden has none of the above🧐

      • Maybe he can hook up with Dame Hillary, she has an honorary cunterate ftom NI , they have a shared interest in pant shitting.

      • Best place for politicians, jail.
        No distractions.
        Can knuckle down to some work.

        Biden could live out his Bobby sands fantasies!

        It’d do wonders for their love life too!
        Plenty of sex in yank prisons!

        They can’t leave each others arseholes alone.

      • Bobby sands right greedy cunt as I remember.
        Always writing his name in shit on the wall’s .

      • Bobby sands was a visionary.
        Take that back Baz.

        He not only invented weight watchers
        He started off the modern art scene.

        Didn’t do much for interior design though..

      • Was that his stand up routine? I wonder if some poor Irish kid will be sacrificed for the sake of diplomatic relations and a bit of creepy hair sniffing for the cameras?

      • I would love if he came for a state visit to the UK. Imagine him being shown around the House of Lords and getting lost, mistaken for just another corpse in a wingback. Or meeting Diane Abbott, now that would be fucking comedy gold.

      • Scottish, American, English elections the same results the law abiding tax payer loses…….

      • Yeah, sort of a update of Forrest Gump and Bubba the shrimp boat captain?

        Di – ” erh, um…hi! Can you tie shoe laces?

        Joe- ” top of the morning to ye! Are you my homehelp?”

        Di- ” not sure, I’m Diane I’m special ”

        Joe ” hi Diane, who am I again?”

        Di ” your the president of Ireland I think?
        Can you open packets of peanuts?
        Jeremy used to do it for me”

        Joe ” peanuts? Like Charlie Brown?

        Di ” your a racist”

    • Useless was installed as leader by this totally kosher vote

      Number of eligible members: 72,169.
      Valid votes received: 50,494
      Electronic: 48,645
      Postal: 1,849

      Today someone leaked that the actual membership number is allegedly closer to 40,000, the other 32,169 must have been lurking in the same place as the missing £600K, pity they couldn’t find the money when they found the voters…

      Oh, before I forget, turns out that there were 78,000 ballots issued, 5,831 more than the reluctantly released ‘official’ membership numbers.

      Fun, and possibly familiar sounding, isn’t it?

  25. “Well I would walk give hundred miles and I would walk five hundred more…” sang 80s ginger Scotch duo, the Proclaimers.

    The British Isles are only about 500 miles long. If they had set off and walked 500 miles, we have to assume that kept going for another 500 miles, which means they would’ve walked out hundreds of miles into the Atlantic Ocean and drowned to death. Which would’ve been such a tragic loss, of course.

    • With their shitty,waterlogged Aran sweaters helping them down. The speech bores.

      • The thing that gets me about The Proclaimers is their cod Scottishness, you know;

        ‘an ah-hah wuid walk fi-hiv hundreid mi-yulls’ etc.

        Cunts, the pair of them.

  26. Did you know that they still sell haggis hunting licences to dumb fuck American Tourists in Glasgow? Not making it up. I bought one just for a laugh.

    The haggis is of course a fascinating creature. It lives typically on round steep mountains – known as McSweens – and because of the nature of its environment has developed into two distinct species – Haggis Scotios Sinistral and Haggis Scotios Dextra. The difference is in the length of its legs. The legs on one side are longer than the other allowing it to stand comfortably on the steep slopes. On which side are the longer legs defines the subspecies.

    The two of course cannot mate as it would involve one or the other turning round with it’s shorter legs facing down the slope, resulting in it rolling down the mountain side.

    You may of course also have seen vegetarian haggis on the supermarket shelf. The haggis lives predominantly on the dreaded Scottish midge. These being only found on the west coast, haggis on the east coast have adapted to live on Heather – hence the emergence of the vegetarian haggis.

    Not a lot of people know this…

    • A truly fascinating and erudite discourse Dio.

      May I also add that in 1990, zoologists mounted an expedition to the Outer Hebrides to search for the Haggis Sin Glutine, a rare and extremely shy creature whom many believed had been hunted to extinction.

      Incredibly, a breeding pair was found, and a successful breeding programme was instigated at Edinburgh Zoo. This means that the wife, who is extremely glutin intolerant, can now eat this delicacy on every St Andrew’s Day, and I’m extremely fortunate in being able to share in the delights of haggis and neeps with her.

      I count my blessings every day.

      • There is the mistaken idea that one shoots for haggis. This simply not true as the correct method is netting.

        The Haggis as I have explained is native to a type of mountain called a McSween characterised as being round and pointed. The hunter uses a large circular net which is held steady in a horizontal position.

        Beaters are employed to scare the haggis. Because of its legs it is confined to a tight altitude on the mountain as it cannot run at speed up or down the slope.

        The hunter simply waits for the haggis to tear around the mountain where it is netted as it comes back around. Simple but effective.

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