The King’s Coronation (6th – 8th May)

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Once again woke infects British life.

Old jug ears wants to put “refugees and The NHS” at the centre of his coronation. If he made it a point to highlight how one has a negative impact on the other; what with imported disease, terrorism, being injured from sitting in a dinghy and violent crime – not to mention costly births from the breeding of these people, then I’d be right behind him.

The fact I know someone at death’s door with cancer, yet struggles to get a doctors appointment shows the NHS needs reform and the immediate sacking of managers. Hardly something to be celebrated right now.

Can’t the powers that be know all we want to do is wave a Union Flag, enjoy the pomp and ceremony, have a bank holiday and piss up?! Or rant at how we hate The Monarchy. It’s our choice; stop ramming this shit down our throats!

Telegraph News Link

Nominated by: Fortress Cuntimus

And seconded by : Cuntologist

May I be so bold as to second this.

It looks like we’re in for three days of coronation events (pure guff) on Saturday May 6, Sunday May 7 and Monday May 8.

The Sun threatens that they’ll be rolling out Brian May, the Spice Girls, Ed Sheeran and more.

Talk TV mentioned that there might be some events around the NHS, refugees and LGBTQ+.

Why stop there? Why not have Klaus Schwab in a duet with Elton? Please fgs, no to all this.

The Sun

Just go to the Abbey/Church/Cathedral, whatever, says your vows, let the Archbishop say his mumbo jumbo and stick the crown on – done.

Could be done in 1 hour tops; 10 mins slow drive there or even better use a kick scooter, 40 mins mumbo jumbo ritual, then back to Buck Pal. Now that is what I call a pared back coronation.

Talk TV said Harry might even end up commentating on the coronation on NBC or some other US channel. What about our mental health?!

97 thoughts on “The King’s Coronation (6th – 8th May)”

  1. See the King is meeting Zelensky today, what the fuck for I have no idea – perhaps he is going to join the spit roast I mentioned earlier and enjoy pizza with Prince Andrew in Pizza Express?

    I wish he’d stop begging for our planes, it’s getting quite boring. We can’t afford to feed his comrades (and all the others who are coming over here) so how can we afford to give him loads of planes at about 20 mil a pop – do one. You wouldn’t support us if the Chinks invaded would you!

    Feels like he is desperate to drag us into WW3 – fuck right off!

    • All part and parcel of the United States latest proxy war.

      The daft bastards left enough military hardware over in Afghanistan to make Zelenskyy cream his pants.

      Zelenskyy should go and ask the Mad Mullah’s over there for a sizable donation of weapons.
      They hate the Russian’s and all don’t they so would maybe be delighted to help.
      🤔

    • I bet those ‘brave’ Zelensky y shitehwaks will be larging it at the Coronation. Zelensky y’s brass of a Mrs will be in a very expensive dress and fifty grand shoes, no doubt.

      That scruffy turd Zelensky y himself will probably turn up in a T-Shirt and combat keks, the fucking tramp.

      • If Zelensky y attends the coronation, then so will Bonio.
        As the U2 diddyman currently resides in Zelensky y’s arse.

    • yes – a country fighting unwanted invaders threatening their culture and way of life – where have I seen that before. It won’t end well I can tell you.

  2. Apparently, Charlie Boy’s coronation is going to be more ‘diverse’ than the one his mother got in 1953. In other words, it will be chocka with sambeaus, peacefuls, circus freaks and LGBTQ. That fake African black cunt who got that royal aide the sack will be there for a start. I dare say she will be at the top table in her bogus tribal garb giving it large, the fat fucking bitch.

    Also, volunteer for charity? My fucking arse. I’ll do it when he – Charles – does it. A mate of mine had the misfortune to manage a charity shop a while ago. And she told me that day after day it was a cavalcade of Bogos and P@k!s either ‘haggling’ or on the thieve. She got so sick of hearing ‘I give you two pound!’ and ‘No speaky Engerlish!’ that she used the lockdown to quit and find something else, and I don’t blame her. Charity now in this country is like food banks, open to abuse by the scum that infest the UK.

  3. Got to admit that although I served the late Queen, I cannot for the life of me find a single ounce of loyalty to this jug eared clown. If it wasn’t for the fact that fucking quadroon, yacht slut and her ginger bollocked, lying fucking walt husband would parade up and down braying that they’d brought the monarchy down I’d say get rid of all of them.

  4. The ‘official’ government/BBC ‘playlist’ for the Coronation is as shite as I thought it would be.

    The expected array of dark personages, poofs (see you, Styles) and the omnipresent Sheercunt is no surprise. But the rest of the choices are bizarre too. The Beatles ‘Come Together’? Don’t they know Lennon was being cynical and sarcastic? These are the sort of retards who think Leonard Cohen’s ‘Hallelujah’ is a Christmas carol.

    Also – much as I love her – why the fuck is Kate Bush on it with ‘Running Up That Hill?’ Because it was on that Stranger Things bollocks? Fucking stupid.

    As for the rest? Spice Girls.Proclaimers, Emile Sande, Grace Jones, Coldplay. What a load of shit.

    • Fat Reginald will not like the fact that he isn’t on this playlist. I’d put him and his Lady Di dirge on my Coronation playlist, just to piss off Charlie Boy.

      • Michael fucking Buble…. Jesus Christ….🤢☠
        Ed Sheercunt….☠☠☠☠☠
        Ellie Goulding…. For fuck’s sake…

        And Tom Jones with ‘The Green Green Grass of Home/. A song about a murderer who is about to be hung. Seriously, what sort of thick as pigshit mong researches or complies these things?

      • Fat Reg can’t be included. He was big mates with Open Legs Diana and equally big mates with the shit cunt Markles. As the Chimpboy himself would say…..appalling!

    • Well, Gary Glitter is out of prison, so get him on the stage in his silver platform shoes and giant bouffant wig, even if it’s covered in the tears of 500 children.

      And surely, Psychic Sally Morgan could muster her considerable spiritual powers to not just contact, but actually MANIFEST the apparitions of those legendary, heroic icons of our Scared and Ancient Land? King Arthur? King Alfred? Shakespeare? No, no. no.

      Sir James Wilson Vincent Savile, Pontifical Equestrian Order of St. Gregory the Great.

      Princess Diana, Most Feminine Spirit of Yahweh.

      And of course, to complete this Trinity of Transcendence…

      Her dad. George VI: Mission To Moscow. But as it’s 2023, he will have to be done up like a woman, like a Mrs Doubtfire-esque Fairy Godmother on her way to Brighton to sprinkle her Magic Dust on a pair of eloping Achilleans.

      But the whole thing culminates in King Tampon being hunted to his true home – yes, Hades. Where he crawls into the dick-hole (URETHRA, to some) of Satan where he will reside for Three Incalculable Aeons before he returns when the Earth requires the presence of EVIL again after a seeming eternity of peace.

      Play a record…
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8LNTCLQs0M&t=10s

  5. I dare say Sir Lenny, Oprah, the Obamas, Lammy, Dame Floella, Mama Markle (the real black one) and Beyonce will attend. Dahversiteeee! Lordy Mama!

    Of course, Charlie will bend over backwards for them, and it still won’t be enough,. It will still be ‘racist’.

  6. A quicker and more diverse coronation, according to reports.
    Which means anything British and what made 1953 so special will be jettisoned and blacks and pooves will take over. Lovely, eh?🙄

    • That’s the way it should be, reflecting the population which is, apparently, 85% gay and 98% black.

    • Might be like The Grammies with Sam Smith dressed as Satan, singing they’s song called Unholy, followed by Harry Styles singing in a dress, then a celebration of 50 years of hip-hop.

    • The footage is now lost, but the1953 Coronation of Queen Elizabeth II actually featured Al Jolson and Rock Hudson doing an interracial re-enactment of how God created man. MAN, not WOMEN. From what my grandfather tells me when he gets drunk enough, it apparently involved Al Jolson coming on stage covered in clay, which a giant, GIANT papier mâché effigy of God’s head which grandad says wasn’t represented like the classic Michelangelo rendering of YHWH, but as a sort-of Old Timey carnival goblin/demon with green skin, horns, pencil moustache and goatee, but the mists of time can play havoc with the mind of a man who was around lead paint fumes all the time.

      Rock Hudson’s role in all of this? He and Al Jolson then smooshed their dicks together until a massive torrent of Divine Seeds gooshed out all over the Earth, the FLAT Earth, of course and this literal seminal fluid was actually milk, provided by United Dairies and almost created a malnutrition epidemic in babies, only remedied by importing camel milk from Palestine and not telling any cunt.

      So, there you have it. Gay shit went on the Good Old Days, too.

      Here’s a fragment of the Al Jolson spunk show, recently found in Bob Monkhouse’s secret sex dungeon:
      https://youtu.be/IJav6Ba2Gc8?t=10

      Simpler times. 🙂

      • I stand by the historical accuracy of every word related by my grandfather. He was there to witness this, as was his brother who had mother of pearl opera glasses, so there is no questioning the fidelity of this absorbing anecdote! 😀 😀 😀

        Another fragment from Bob Monkhouse’s secret sex dungeon archive…

        https://youtu.be/5vYfnKo8Ylk?t=404

        Hudson’s biographer, David Bret claims that this is actually Hudson’s stunt-double, Ernie “Bumpy” Francesco, who was found inside Frank Sinatra’s Corvette in Las Vegas on August 14, 1970, with his anus totally reamed out, no blood in his body. The coroner ruled, “possible suicide”. Recent DNA evidence shows that Bumpy had recently converted to Scientology. The plot thickens…

      • Ok Gordon I believe your Grandfather’s truth 🤣

        At the recent Grammies, Sam Smith did actually turn up dressed like Satan and sang a song called Unholy with a trans person and they both got an award. I wonder if Archbishop Welby watched it? He might even have recorded it!

      • The first AIDS joke I ever heard was when Hudson carked it.

        Q: What’s the name for the lowest form of AIDS?
        A: Rock Bottom.🙄😉

    • Interesting facts dept:

      Satan was born less than a month prior to Brenda’s coronation.

      King Jug Ears coronation is set to take place on Satan’s 70th birthday.

      Coincidence? I think not.

  7. Tom Cruise is going to the Coronation or so I read in the Daily Mail today.

    He should drop down horizontally from the Abbey ceiling and put the Crown on Charles.

    • What? How does that two bob little cunt get an invite? Maybe Tom can convert Charlie to Scientology at the booze up afterwards. The silly old cunt is just daft enough to fall for it. Wanker.

    • Maybe Cruise is there because of diversity. Maybe Chuck wants some creepy midgets at the ceremony….🤔

  9. The whole shit fest can go to Fuck as it’s my birthday on May 8th and I will not be taking part in the Eastbenders Royal chuck the keys in gangbang, so Knock your self out King Chas and give that Ginger ‘Bastard’ a good kicking for bringing to our attention what we already knew is that your entire family aren’t any different than some low life benefit street reality show.!

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