Hugh Jackman [2]

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Hugh Jackman is a cunt, isn’t he.

There’s always been something poncey about this aloof twinkletoes. It’s as if he genuinely considers himself to be talented, rather than the half-trick cunt he is. Whether he’s dressing up as a cat for spotty teenagers in endless noisy X-Men films, singing like an amputee in Les Mis, or any of the other forgettable turds he’s done, he’s fucking tedious. He’s so dreary, he makes Tom Hanks look exciting. Why does he stare at his claws as if he forgot he had them?

Has nobody told him or Nicole Kidman that they’ve only been cast to flog cinema seats to the Convicts down under?

The only decent film he’s been in is The Prestige and not because of Huge Arseman; it would’ve been even better without this dead-eyed, tiresome fop.

Recently, he decided to advertise Bill Gates’s latest book about climate change:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=dMGC6kw6nKA

Despite owning yachts and his own private aeroplane, Jack-off doesn’t see the hypocrisy in wagging a book on climate change in your face. Stick your claws up your jacksie.

Nominated by: Captain Magnanimous

56 thoughts on “Hugh Jackman [2]”

  1. Being a perverted snivelling little child sniffing weasel cunt kind of goes with the job in Hollycunt, if you’re male and wanna be a movie star you have to sacrifice a few babies, suck off billy gates gruff, stick your tongue up Tommy Hanks box of chocolate and wear the obligatory ugly frock and lipstick, its really compulsory, name a hollycunt star that hasn’t worn a dress in a film. Hope they all die screaming.

  3. hugh is alright in my book, his missus is older than him and a bit of a porker, but not Dianne Abbott size, he could easily dump her for some big titted bimbo but he knows which side his bread is buttered, so fair play to him

    • porker? no shit sherlock, greenpeace had to roll his wife back into the sea, but she’s a mere tiddler compared to pierce brosbum’s pet Godzilla

  4. My missus loves this bloke.
    I had to sit through some love story shite called Australia with him in.
    Then Wolverine with her an the kids.
    I finally mutinied when it was some fuckin circus musical!!!?

    Not being funny but like Meatloaf (R.I.P) I would do anything for love .
    But I won’t do that.

    • feel same about edward scissorhands, pirates and fucking musicals about serial killer barbers..i would shit in his bed too

      • That cunt has been the highest paid actor for under performing i.e. massive lose making films of all time.Junky wanker.

  5. Ps
    Maggie you really don’t like our antipodean cousins do you?

    I like them!
    Better than kiwis!
    And down to earth,
    Their beers shite but still.

    Here’s my Hero Keith Moon from the beat combo The Who showing you how to deal with Aussies.😁

    https://youtu.be/IifezehtVSg

    • It depends where you are Miserable, Melbourne is like an Aussie Bristol or San Francisco , artisan bread, coffee and graffiti = cunts.
      Darwin is better! Good people but a bit crazy, going troppo is the official medical definition…when the heat gets too much.

      • Spot on LL
        we are off on a six week trip soon and Mrs infidel wants to revisit Melbourne, I can’t stand the place but I do think the old prison is worth a visit

    • Aussie can’t cook chips and their white fish it fucking shite, kiwis cunts have an irritating accent but at least give you a free deep fried oyster with their shite fish and chips.

  6. He’s probably a dripping wet feminist darkıe-lover, but at least he has the sense to not go spouting on about it, unlike his Marvel team-mate Mark Ruffalo, one of the utterest cunts to ever draw breath.

    • The Hulk bloke?
      Is he woke Thomas?
      Doesn’t surprise me.

      Most of them are nowadays.

      I preferred Lou Ferrigno as the Hulk anyway.
      The big dummy.

      • Lou Ferrigno has said that he finds Ruffalo’s version of the hulk hard to take seriously.
        Big green poofter 😂😂😂

      • BB@
        Comes to something when you can’t take the Hulk seriously.

        My old gran loved the TV series,
        Remember the reporter who was hunting him?
        McGee?
        She hated that cunt!😄

        “He just won’t leave him alone!
        Hounding him!
        Should be ashamed of himself.”

        She took the Hulk very seriously.

        https://youtu.be/z9MysTXM_P4

      • The TV show was cheesy, but it was GOOD cheese.
        Now we have self important bad cheese that takes itself far too seriously….

      • If the Hulk had lived on our estate his life would of been miserable with local kids.

        He has a seizure, turns green, tips all his clothes and goes mental!

        “Put a firework through his letterbox!”

        “Yeah let’s egg his windows!”

      • The original Hulk series was enjoyable.

        Metal Mickey was when it all started to go downhill. What a fucking abomination that was.

        Oh, as was that 3-2-1 with Ted Rogers.
        Those fucking ‘clues’.

        “You chose this prize. You believe it’s the star prize of the new Mini Metro. Here is the clue that convinced you.

        You’ll go far
        In this vehicle
        That rhymes with ‘tar’.

        Well you’ll go far.
        ‘Go far’ well…maybe ‘gopher’
        A gopher is ‘the vehicle’ for children’s television at the moment.
        And rhymes with ‘tar’.
        Well ‘star’ rhymes with tar.
        The star with the gopher is Philip Schofield.
        Philip and Gordon the gopher live in the BBC’s ‘broom cupboard’.
        What else do you keep in a broom cupboard?
        Yes, that’s right. A bin.
        You’ve won the booby prize of Dusty Bin!”

        What the fuck was that shit?

      • Like anyone EVER took the grotty green giant seriously LOL…green cross code man gets my vote everytime..better biceps

      • I fucking loved Littlest Hobo, cried everytime, anyone know if he ever did get home?

  8. Failed the audition for James Bond for being “slightly effeminate”
    😂😂😂
    Not much use without stick on claws and mutton chops…

    • Bit to fond of the singing and dancing isn’t he?

      Seems a nice enough bloke, like that Michael Barrymore.

      A born entertainer.

      • maybe but at least you can swim in Hugh’s swimming pool and not have your arse feel like it’s had a high speed train pass through it

      • See Barry?
        Born entertainer and lovely singing voice.

        I never realised Michael was a honorary firefighter?
        He slides down a pole like he’s done it numerous times!

      • @ baron, what a fucking pile of mince, I wouldn’t rescue Barrymore to save even my own life, the screaming mincer needs the oven and more oven and more oven

      • How can you say such a thing?
        Michael is not only a entertainer but a first aider.
        He saved a bloke choking on a prawn by reaching into his upper colon and retrieving it.

        Admittedly he’d make a terrible life guard.

      • Barrymore is sorely missed, I reckon he could still forge himself a new career as a lifeguard down the local baths

  9. Never knowingly seen the cunt and dont do adolescent superhero shit which seems to have replaced films.
    Any relation to Hugh Jampton?

  12. When he’s reading the bullshit manual from Bill Gates whilst having a crap on the bog, I hope he’s got the claws on for when he wipes afterwards

  13. Large sideburns only work on proper hard cunts with faces made of granite, one never comments on there’re appearance for obvious reasons.
    But with Hugh , “He’s a nice fella , lovely isn’t he?” says the middle aged women to the uninterested party.

  15. Have to be bloody careful wiping your arse with them fucking claws. 10 pints of wife beater and a sudden urge for number 2 forget the claws and wake up in hospital as Ms Wolverina. Fuck that no trendy body mods for me..

  16. Stick to the singing and acting Hugh, as well as photographing yourself lifting big weights, because nobody else can do that.

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