The Borgias

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What the fuck is this?

Jeremy Ferromagnetic, spends the whole series proving he is ‘NOT GAY’ by diddling moist slags by the thousands. He brilliantly sounds all papal and popey but then for some reason suffers severe alzheimers and and starts sounding like a dopey cafe bint saying ‘do you want a bacon sarnie with that?’*. This ebbing and flowing of papal lah de dah with relapses into East London slack jawing is most intriguing. I’m sure the Pope of the 15th-16th century would have to agree.

Anyhoo while shagging loads of slags and generally putting bints in their place and identifying cross dressers so he can put his papal rod up their trans hole he sends off his son (Bob Geldof) to act all tough and dish out punishment. His other son, who is more effeminate tups his 13 yr old brothers wife while the 13yr old kisses pigeons in the garden. Finally Jezza’s daughter get’s fucked brutally by an Alan Rickmon wannabe who in turn gets rogered by a stableboy. Every guy in this is a weak sort of nancy, and the very first battle between France and Italy (well Rome) was decided by yes you’ve guessed it SURRENDER.

So Bob Geldof gets upset because a bird he fucked had her ears chopped off by ‘some tough frenchman’ so Bob Geldoff sends of his hard man who whispers all the time to sound menacing. He is a one man torture department and loves dishing out purple nurples (that’s about it). It’s really quite sad because the ‘Lord High Marshal’ from Riddick is complete wasted in this as he is poisoned and now suffers from Fat Tongue.

Then Bob Geldoff get’s together a load of tough italians to take down the French, blow up their powder mag and after this the top ‘ard man with the second top ‘ard man celebrate ‘their victory’ with a dung funnel penetration in a graveyard. Meanwhile, Bob Geldoff fucks the sister of the guy who force fucked his sister and sided with the French. Just as it gets interesting, we cut to the graveyard and the inevitable essential climax of the two important hard men finishing up. I am sure this series was done by the BBC, but I can’t be bothered to check.

The high tech weapons in the italian armoury are truly hilarious. ‘As effective as a cat flap in the elephant house’. Seriously a pizza cutter and a mincer would have me more convinced**. Anyhoo what next a period drama of the faggot community in the teutonic era? I really want to understand how they collect so many sticks.

*(always finishing with a Lock Jaw from He-man Pose trying to find a picture)
**oh wait I get it now THEY were the mincer

Nominated by: Get Fucked Woke Cunts

34 thoughts on “The Borgias”

  3. I will refrain from watching this crock of utter shite.
    As a maniacal dictator I am far too busy for nonsense! 😀

      • TSG@ – I can only show the true level of my evil AFTER I am “elected”!
        I look forward to the records crowds celebrating my victory – and I strongly suggest “enthusiastic support” from the people if they ever want to be seen again..😀👍
        My “Ministers of common sense” (Mnc, Sir Fiddler and Unkle Terry) will ensure whining lefties and general softies are educated in the error of their ways, DCI Gene will be “Minister for Health” (waste his time calling his wagon for a fkin cold and see how your health is afterward!)
        JTC Will be my “Immigration Minister” (As in there won’t fkin be any – and any mucky fuckers already here will be “assisted in relocating”).
        Aah, it will be grand – sat on the village green with a nice picnic watching the ducks and taking pot shots at any “shifty looking types”.

      • …& hopefully some stocks for stoning the ‘woke’ types before Dick & Terry begin their ‘re-education’?

      • I’d like to put myself forward as minister for science. I’ve got some really inventive and efficient oven concepts I want to try out on “volunteers”

  6. So they’re trying to convince us that the pope fucks everything except boys?

    Anything made after 2018 is at the very least tainted with woke shit but many times just eaten up with it. That’s ok. There are plenty of things to watch and rewatch when I have time to sit and watch TV which is rare.

  8. I’m fucked if I know what this is about. Geldof?? Were pikeys part of the set up?

  9. I have no idea what this is about but it makes a change from posts about Labour MP wankers, people using bikes, or nominations about vegans by miserable, geriatric gammons. It’s some kind of TV programme about despotic cunts running Europe which is presumably a metaphor about the Reich.

  10. 3 fuckin times ive read this nom and im still none the wiser.

    Its like the fight scene in Blazing Saddles with loads of different films crossing over.

    Just a stream of consciousness,
    Bob Geldof, 15th century nobles, He-man, pizza, popes,
    Bacon butties etc.

    I like it.👍

      • Mnc@ – Or nazi zombies – can’t beat nazi zombies for entertainment!
        Dinosaurs also acceptable but none of the herbivores – if I wanted to see a huge dumb creature grunting, farting and eating its own weight every day I would watch Diane Abbott in the House of Cunts.
        And the “fearsome T Rex”? – Get me a step ladder – I’ll do the stubby armed fker!

      • Agreed Foxy.

        When it comes to dinosaurs its carnivorous or nothing.
        Zombie nazis!!
        Yep, throw them in too 👍
        Werewolves on motorcycles
        And handgliding monkeys.

        Perfect recipe for a film.
        No dialogue
        Just a soundtrack.

        Popcorn.
        Butterkist only.

      • You had me at bacon butties, Miserable. Maybe some breakdancing midgets or a gorilla in a clown car would work too.

      • Evening MNC…I saw a dwarf driving a Range Rover stopped at a red light whilst out running yesterday. Thought for a moment it was Peter Dinklage ‘cos he had a goatee.
        It got me to thinking…what the hell is the pedal arrangement in a Range Rover for a dwarf? And how did the stumpy little fucker dismount from such a high vehicle? Watching that could have been amusing…

      • Evening MNC…I saw a đwärf driving a Range Rover stopped at a red light whilst out running yesterday. Thought for a moment it was Peter Dinklage ‘cos he had a goatee.
        It got me to thinking…what the hell is the pedal arrangement in a Range Rover for a đwärf? And how did the stumpy little fucker dismount from such a high vehicle? Watching that could have been amusing…

  11. Mnc@ – That’s the one – but mind those werewolves have tax and insurance if they are riding around on motorcycles up to rambunctious behaviour!
    Shifty no good werewolves..

    • Just mentioned that in the blame whitey nom, only to discover you beat me to it. Always the bridesmaid. She can still be a useful member of society, as a poster girl for BLM, or she might write a book about special relativity like that Hawkins bloke.

  14. Is it as bad as the godawful BBC version from the 1980s?
    That was pretty dire…

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