General Sir Mark Carleton Smith

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General Sir Mark Carleton-Smith

Who feels* that the Army needs to be more woke:

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10468001/Tens-thousands-troops-ordered-spend-DAY-reflecting-inclusivity.html

“An Army spokesman told MailOnline: ‘It is not the army being woke, it is the army addressing some of its unacceptable behaviours.’

‘Unacceptable behaviours’ refers to anything that falls short of the Army’s values and standards, including drug and alcohol abuse, sexual harassment, bullying and racism.”

Arguably these “behaviours” (check the plural: always a sign that a social worker or cod psychologist has been involved) are exactly what an effective fighting force needs in its ranks – tough brutal cunts who don’t ask too many questions and know how to entertain themselves on a Friday night in Colly.

General Sir Mark Alexander Popham Carleton-Smith (Eton, unsurprisingly, but failed Oxbridge – 2:2 BA at Durham) seems to have forgotten anything he learned in Bosnia in the 90’s, in the euphoria of his subsequent glittering ascent of the staff ladder. He was in the SAS once, ffs. Maybe it’s dementia. Brasshatted cunt.

*I can’t believe thought was involved.

Nominated by Komodo

60 thoughts on “General Sir Mark Carleton Smith”

  1. He confirms my theory that anyone with Sir in front on their name is an automatic cunt.
    I may be unaware of some exceptions so feel free to enlighten me.

  2. Anyone dumb enough to want to join the military, should be allowed in. That’s my philosophy.

  3. What fucking unacceptable behaviours? This is the military we are talking about isn’t it, not some dago dancing school for Marmite Badgers? When I joined RM as a spotty, mouthy self opinionated 17 year old the troop sargeant said in no uncertain terms that the training team was going to beast us into oblivion to weed out the namby pamby fucking homo bedwetter bumboys and mummy’s boys who had no right to breath the same West Country air as he did. He said ‘Once you sign on that line you are mine for the next 30 days, until the first opt out and I can do what I fucking like to get rid of any of you cunts we don’t want’. Unacceptable behaviours?

    • Does anyone remember the days when ‘ unacceptable behaviour’ in the Army consisted of :-
      a) unable to see reflection in boots
      b) loose thread on uniform
      c) failure to empty a full mag into target at the firing range

      Is this the future of the brirish army ?
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qxs3gmewuhI

  4. The time ‘off’ would be better spent on working out more effective ways to kill the enemy without being killed.

    Or maybe a fun day when Hallam and his mates start causing problems, use the army and it’s new found wokeness to persuade Mr Hallam to move on 😂

  6. “drug and alcohol abuse, sexual harassment, bullying and racism”
    Surely these are perks?

    • TtCE@ – Reminds me of “an incident” involving a motorcycle being ridden down a Cypriot street on the back wheel, a trip through a shop window and a “somewhat over refreshed” Officer receiving a vigorous telling off!
      Totally fked our kids knee as well – still gives the miserable old sod grief today.

  7. Let’s face it, the armed forces has to sissy up it’s requirements if they have any hope of recruiting anyone from the spineless selfish workshy millenniums and the even worse molly coddled generation that followed.
    These cunts are such wimps that dad’s army would be classed as special forces.

  8. If it went down I would rather stand shoulder to shoulder with ten squaddies than a thousand wokeflakes.
    Although the way things are going the piss weak marxist rats will probably be on the other side – good luck delivering those bran milk lattes and vegan bakes in the war zone Ivan!
    I was born in the wrong century – I should have been stood in a field hacking some foreign buggers to bits with an axe.
    Highly disappointing.

  10. Joining the army isn’t very appealing in the 21st century. It stopped being appealing in 1919 when kids saw their father come home with no face, arms, legs, genitals and had to be “put away” for the next few decades. After 1945, it truly had by then made it obvious to young people that indeed, “war is Hell,” and people started looking to a future free from this caveman nihilistic nonsense.

    Here we are in 2022. Guess what? No one wants to join the police or army, unless they are nutters who see it as a jolly for taking drugs, raping – I mean shagging and generally be shite at soldiering and creating total camaraderie in the unit with no bullying, crass comments, etc. And the high command has to deal with it by giving them human psychology 101 lessons. They aren’t in San Quentin Prison – it isn’t sections of black, white, gays, Chicanos, Muslims, Neo-Nazi skinheads.

    GET ON WITH YOUR TRAINING! GET ON WITH EACH OTHER!
    YOU’LL HAVE EACH OTHERS BACKS IN A PADDY FIELD SOME DAY!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHxf17yJsKs
    (4 mins)

  11. My idea of heaven is the late great R. Lee Ermey welcoming thirty millennium woke snowflakes to the Marine Corps at Parris Island. “Semper Fi you fucking worthless maggots. Now drop down and give me twenty five”.

    • 25? What about all morbidly obese the fat-fucks who make Gomer Pyles look like Karen Carpenter?

    • Full Metal Jacket is on TCM tonight at 9. I’ll be watching it even though I have the DVD.
      Should any of you not have seen it , make sure that you do; Stanley Kubrick and R. Lee Ermey .

      • Papillon Soo Soo still gives me the horn. Still looks great at 59. $20 is not so beacoup for her. Me so horny.

      • Nothing beats a slightly unhinged Adam Baldwin
        (not one of those dreadful Baldwin brothers, so not a cunt)

        “You talk the talk.
        Do you walk the walk?”
        😁

      • My favourite film Guzzi. The street fighting scenes in Hue are immense. Never get tired of watching it. Would highly recommend the 4K version, looks and sounds great.

      • I only recently found out that Anthony Michael Hall, the kid from Breakfast Club and Weird Science, was Kubrick’s first choice or Private Joker. But it sounds like he and his agent wanted too much money, thought that Hall was the next Tom Cruise or some shit, so Kubrick chose Matthew Modine, which was a great choice, I think. Hall made a forgotten piece-of-shit film, Out of Bounds. Imagine passing up on Kubrick? He should have worked for free. Modine kept a diary while shooting which is said to be fascinating.

  12. Is this officer in the pay of the Yellow Peril?
    I can’t imagine this sort of caper being very good for morale.
    More box ticking bullshit as the Bear and the Dragon laugh themselves silly.
    Perfect.

    • Oh and just a brief word for Doris and chums:
      Stop jabbering on about distant countries and deploy our armed forces to defend Kent from the ongoing vermin invasion.
      You pathetic cunts.

  13. Whats worse. Sexual harassment and drunkenness or stoving the enemies head in with an entrenching tool. How come the first two are out but the third ones in. Very odd.

  14. What a load of fucking nonsense.

    You can’t have a “woke” or a politically correct armed forces which is overly concerned with not hurting peoples feelings or mis-gendering some fucking member of the alphabet community for crying out loud!
    Or an armed forces that is worried about behaving in a manner that’s more than a wee bit rowdy after a few pints as a group of supposedly fighting men.

    One thing that never ceases to amaze me is the pace at which this once proud nation and its institutions continue to slide into the abyss.

    Stupid cunts.

    • Yeah, isn’t the point to strip away the identity of the “civilian”, shave their head, get them naked, have them put on the uniform and obey order, commit to the training, eat the food and bond as a unit under all pressure? Then go out there and… put electrodes on the balls of Arabs?

  15. … and what you end up with is a group of people that are smitten with PTSD the moment they’re deployed and see their first action.
    I’ll not bother to discuss this as anyone who has not spent time in military service, particularly HMAF, can only make loose judgements and assumptions as to what constitutes the ‘right stuff’ for military personnel. Remember it’s a big machine and not everyone is required to be a full on berserker.
    It’s not easy being in and it’s very challenging when you decide to get out. The life skills required in both instances are dramatically different.

  16. i am glad the pluralisation of “behaviour” isn’t just a bete noir with me. I first heard it years ago on Wireless 4, usually used by pseudo-intellectual American wimminz who wanted to sund important, and when you saw them on TV you could tell what they looked like – straggly long unkempt hair, cruddy clothing, ugly as sin – an early version of AnalEase , in fact. These days even bargain basement actors and MPs use it.

    As for this tosser – I bet his men take the piss out of him unmercifully, as well they might.

    • All philosophers, psychologists, anthropologists, cosmologists, sociologists and all other gurus, expert and pundits can blow me in a Jacuzzi while I smoke weed using their white papers as rollies.

  17. Don’t know much about the state of our forces, but I have read some of the recruiting material ! It seems there is a shortage of representatives from the “f nik ” the “bent brigade” and the “vertically challenged”. The literature outlines enthusiastically that no matter what ails you, a good career awaits your decision.

    I notice the Gaurds no longer have a required height of 6 feet and seemingly there are no minimum height requirements. Soldiers being “scolded” is not acceptable.
    Now then, I recall some years back, a young Muslim Airman who refused to serve during the Gulf war, was Court Martialled, having objected on religious grounds to fight against his Muslim “brothers” Well fuck me sideways, you now get the choice to abstain from conflicts that may upset you.

    So what the fuck is the point of funding armed services who quite frankly seem recruited from the slops of a degenerative society, once riddled with queers and fuckwits? Putin and his crew must be pissing themselves laughing at what we muster up these days.

  18. The job of the army is to fight. Unfortunately you can’t usually fight without hurting the feelings of your opponent ( as well as hurting other things).

    Soldiers should be professional in their dealings and follow a military code of honour, as they have always done. But too much PC bollox will turn them into pansies scared of their own shadow.

  19. If you didn’t cry when you had your belly button pierced
    Why not consider a job in the Armed Forces?

    Competitive pay
    Pension
    Meet other boys!!

    UK Armed forces Advertisement
    2026

  20. Coming from a military family (I was precluded from enlisting due to colour blindness) one was brought up to have unbending devotion to Madge and that their job is to compromise the materiel, infrastructure and moral of Madge’s enemies (see verse 2 of GStQ. I don’t care if you wear a ball gown off duty but there is no room for sooks in the forces.

  22. Good job this cunt wasn’t around for D-Day. Total fuck wit, Vlad must be pissing his pants.

  27. Of course our armed forces should mirror our society, a whole new industry could be created supplying combat wigs, boots combat heels high etc. The fact that this vision of woke is utter fucking bollocks is neither him or her or they or it. The man must have been threatened with reduction in pension or something.

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