People who are late. I couldnt give a fuck about Covid or lockdowns but when you invite people over ( couldnt give a fuck about that either) and they are late when you have done a rib of beef its a cunt. Fuck right off, your never being invited again.
Nominated by: Smug cunt
Seconded by: Cunty Gordon
My brother and his wife often turn up 30 minutes late to our mum’s house on sundays. They tell her during the week that they will be over at 2:00pm and then turn up at 2:30 without an apology or even a good explanation. So we are left waiting for 30 minutes with the roast chicken ready to go for 2:30. How hard is it to be on time in this day and age when you have a car?
I have noticed this a lot in the past few years. People are late when it is IMPOSSIBLE for them to be late, so the the truth is that they were pissing about doing something selfish. And we all have phones on us 24/7 so calling or texting that you’ll be late is effortless.
I agree-the only thing worse than a late cunt, is a late cunt who doesn’t let you know they are running late or apologise.
Actually the only thing worse is when a casual lady friend whispers those two words that drain the colour out of a young studs face: “I’m late!”
😳😢
21
Late=rude.
I dont give a fuck enough about you to be on time, it says to me.
My old dad drummed it into me to Never be late,
Now its a fuckin phobia.
Im never late,
Never!
Always early because I panic about being late.
Ive even developed premature ejaculation,
But never late😁
14
Very true Miserable, its the height of rudeness without a valid reason, you can see why those lazy Spanish dogs failed with the Armada, too busy with manana and burning religious minorities at the stake.
7
Lazy spics, eating paella and sat on their arse half the day?
I dont understand how they conquered South America?
Those Aztecs, human sacrifice and worshipping Jaguars,
Enslaved by a bunch of lisping manuel types?
The soft llama milking panpipe playing, poncho wearing fa99ots.
12
Wait a minute. Didn´t Drake fart about playing bowls or some other sissy game dressed in ruffled shirt, codpiece and tights while the Armada was about to lob shells onto England´s green and pleasant land?
6
Taking it on the chin is she?
6
Sorry that should have gone beneath the premature ejaculation.
5
If somebody is persistently late, then late them back.
If an employee is persistently late then make sure their wages are paid in persistently late.
If a relative or friend is persistently late then make sure you turn up extra late for ‘that’ special occasion, Christmas dinner for instance.
If you are challenged about this course of behaviour, just enlighten them that you didn’t think it mattered as they have been doing the exact same thing without explanation!
Job done.
16
Every company I know and deal with are now blaming the sacred cow of Covid for anything that it could possibly be blamed for.
Late arrival of consultants and deployment staff, late arrival of parts, lack of support via telephone or email…everything.
Being late or a total cunt is just part of being ruled over by a fat lying philandering fat useless fucking low life corrupt cunts like Johnson and Hancock……it’s the new normal if you like and now totally acceptable.
Why is your homework lad laddie? Covid
Why is this job not even started let alone finished? Covid
Why are you such a cunt? Covid
Why is Cunty McCuntface not in today? his wife’s brother’s half uncles twice removed former room mate is “isloating” = COVID
If I’m ever late for anything (which is rare) it’s because I’m a total cunt and I hate other human beings with a passion.
11
Post Chinky Flu’ will sort out those lazy fuckers.
3
I’d just start the meal, and if the cunts whinge, tell them to fuck off.
11
Fucking ignorant cunts. Get the dinner and if they are late, well tough fucking shit. I would tell them to be there on time or don’t bother.
10
I was about to make a joke about being late to this cunting but there are only 9 replies so I guess I have to apologise for being early.
5
Whatever you may think of the Germans, they’re never late. Action White, the plan to invade Poland, was set for 6am on September 1st 1939 and the Wehrmacht kicked it off at 5:58am. Efficient see.
8
Had an argument with a Frenchman in a sports quiz. The question was ‘who won the first tour de France?’ Apparently the 5th Panzer division was the wrong answer.
13
Late?
On very rare occasion it’s unavoidable, but making an effort to let people know is good manners.
Late for dinner?
No dinner – it won’t happen twice and a good lesson in not taking the piss.
Persistently late in business?
I don’t do business with them.
Late for work?
Warning, then sacked.
Persistently late in anything else – not good enough, and generally means a verbal blast – it’s just laziness, selfishness, lack of planning and organisation and damned bad manners.
Waste my time?
No. That may sound mean, but I am a stickler for being on time.
10
In my teaching phase the senior management called a staff briefing for 0835 twice a week. I gave them two minutes grace and the left if they had not shown up. My colleagues started to follow my habit and soon the cunts were waltzing in to a near empty room.
Being late says ‘ I am more important than you’.
Fuck Off !
13
The very height of bad manners.
The best revenge for lateness at a soiree is to invite the cunts in without mentioning owt then enjoy a surfeit of fine wine and brandy without offering them a drop.
Tremendous.
5
I hate being late and will call and text if I’m delayed. Most of the time the bloody trains are late or cancelled. Fix the trains, signals etc. Cunts!
5
Being more than 60 seconds early is also a cunt. I tend to hang around on street corners if I arrive early. Being late is okay for social events as long as it is no more than ten minutes (it is more polite than being early and potentially causing hosts embarrassment) this is according to Mrs Twenty, who knows all about such matters.
Being late for work appointments is fucking outrageous and should result in summary dismissal. Unlike for social occasions, being a little early for work it is not a cunt, it shows respect.
If anyone is interested in advice on whether to wear your shirt collar inside or outside the neck of your jumper in a social context please do not hesitate to ask.
7
PS Why no footballing nom? I am watching Villa v Wolves and it is utterly tedious cunt. These fuckers are paid a fortune to turn out this low grade shit. Disgusting.
2
Easy Twenty, no football chat on here, you’ll upset all the tennis fans. 🤣
1
Wear a V-neck jumper, problem solved.
Thank me later.
5
Being on time is a sign of respect.
Being late but phoning to apologize and explain is a sign of respect.
Being late without apology/explanation gets you cut out of my will.
Or your feet cut off, your choice.
7
Being late does you a disservice.
It implies your not serious,
Your disorganised,
your rude, unreliable.
If someone was late to a interview with me theyd be best not turning up because ive already decided not to employ them.
That ‘waiting for Godot’?
Fuck him im gone.
9
If I got an email from a potential employer who didn’t know ho wto use contractions properly, I’d turn up to the interview just so I could walk out of it on principle.
Sorry.
3
A few weeks ago I was expecting to hire 10 boys, but security only let six in the gate.
“These six are the ones who signed up a week ago, the other four sitting there just showed up today hoping for a job”.
“Where are the other four signed-up boys then?”
“They missed the bus”
On the FIRST facking day!
So I let the other four boys come in and hired them.
“You can’t do that!”
“I just did.”
5
*how to
……also sorry
3
I wouldn’t be there to see you walk out.
If I was having contractions id be in the maternity unit.
6
Nicely facetious but I think you know of which contractions I was speaking.
Or not…… never mind.
2
Not.
Explain.
2
@Ruff Tuff Creampuff
Who is that comment directed at?
2
At you, TiTS.
I know not of which contractions you was speaking of.
3
If thats how you view contraction’s its evident you might be one of them there person’s with uteruses’.
1
@Three Stokes
As per my previous comment to Ruff Tuff, please refer to the previous comment by TheBestRevengeIsLivingWell for context.
That is all.
3
My reply was to MNC
Is there a problem?
3
So, these apostrophes get some abbreviations pregnant, they all miss the contractions and then forget to turn up for the birth…..
Grammar*, the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit.
* Unless you’re using predictive text or dictation.
5
@Miserable Northern Cunt and Ruff Tuff Creampuff……… this comment should explain what I meant because it’s exactly what I meant (whilst I was also being unintentionally an arsehole).
3
The stars are matter, we are matter, but it doesn’t matter.
Sleep well TiTS, me old fruit bat. 🙂
3
3 hours later I finally worked out that I accidentally posted a correction to my previous comment in a new comment…….. that explains the confusion.
Glad I could be of assistance/confusion!
4
That’s all right, Two, but I would not hire anyone who used a contraction in a business communication.
It’s unprofessional, and lazy, and not what I want to work with.
2
Id fire anyone who didn’t.
But then being a removals firm gramma plays a poor second to being able to lift one end of a piano.
3
You hump it son, I’ll play it.
Morning Miserable. 🌞
2
Morning Ruff!😀👍
1
The Yanks have been late for two world wars.
That must be the ultimate in being late.
The cunts.
Get To Fuck.
10
I’m surprised Biden wasn’t late to Trump’s inauguration on January 20th! Luckily Kamala Harris was there to prop him up.
5
They’re all a bit slow.
3
Wimmin. No matter what time you agree on they are ALWAYS fucking late.
That is all.
5
Uttercunt@ – A very helpful tip – just tell the ladies it is half an hour before it actually is! 😀👍
4
I’ll try that VF. Thanks for the tip.
0
No mate, you just came too early.
4
If the pictured bird used those lips on me I wouldn’t be late, it’d be all over her face in about three sucks so best if she keeps those specs on.
3
Being late is them telling you, that you don’t matter, to them.
5
I remember working at a college in Manchester, and it was a great place to work. Then, in the late 90s, Satan Blair got in. I recall one lad – a great lad and a good and smart student actually – was late three or four times. It never bothered me as he was only five minutes late at the most. But a fellow colleague used to snidely get at him for it. Only thing was, a BAME type in her class was consistently late. And when I say late I mean half an hour late every fucking time, and the bitch didn’t say a word to him. It was the start of special treatment for these cunts and it stank, I resigned within 18 months.
4
People who are late is my pet hate, I used to go biking with a great group of guys.
We would organise ride outs on a Sunday at 10.30 am, thit hadn’t changed in years, it got to the stage when you had been waiting half an hour an then you would get the call to say, I’m running late call by my house in the opposite direction we were intending to go in.
So in your leathers in the height of summer, you pull up outside their house to find their cooking bacon sandwiches, or in a towel, it got to the stage we’re it pissed me off to the point we’re I stopped bothering….
Late people piss me off beyond belief….
2
The chick in the glasses, where did you find that pic?
0
She does look super hot (I dig chicks in glasses).
0
Yeah, a real beauty. (I realize that sounded sarcastic, but I meant what I said)
0