Dateline 5th October: Edinburgh
“Good morning. This is IsAC’s political correspondent Ron Knee speaking to you. I’m standing in front of the Scottish parliament, where a motley crew of demonstrators is preparing to set off on a march through the city. With me is Mr Angus McCoathupp, one of the organisers. Tell me, Mr McCoathupp; what exactly is going on here?”.
‘Aye. Wuz marchin’ cos th’ people aw Scortlund wunt hendependence. Th’ people aw Scortlund wunt ah referendum ken’.
“Erm, actually the name’s Ron. But tell me, wasn’t there a referendum on this matter quite recently? Didn’t ‘the people of Scotland’ as you call them, vote to stay in the Union? Wasn’t the referendum termed ‘a once in a lifetime event’ by the SNP?”.
‘See youse Jimmy, that wus then, this is noo, ken’.
“Ron. But Mr McCoathupp, all the polls suggest that the majority of Scots don’t want another referendum, and that if there was one, you’d lose again. Then what would happen?”.
‘Aye. Wull. Then we’d stamp wa little feet an’ shout an’ scweam and scweam, cos aw them Unionists is traitorous Tory scum, an’ they’re auld, an’ theck as mince, and didna ken wut they wus votin’ aboot… o’ flewer o’ Scortlund…’.
“Yes, well, thank you Mr McCoathupp (and might I suggest that you seek medical advice about that swivelling eye?). This is Ron Knee, for IsAC, returning you to the studio”.
Nominated by Ron Knee
Sturgeon is still miffed the BBC took off the White Heather Club, but determined to have her own way she organised her very own edition at the Conference this weekend. McCunt is a dreadful old bag, but so very entertaining:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bU_C-HLM8-0
8
Let’s just give the cunts their precious independence and see how long they last cut of from the English tit and enslaved by the Fifth Reich in Brussels. As PG Wodehouse said – “It has never been hard to tell the difference between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.” These cunts will never shut up so let’s be rid of them now and then have a good laugh at their expense.
29
I hate cunts who think that every fucking scotsman is pro independence. I for one can’t stand that dizzy fucking bitch and all her haggis munchin, caber tossin, false fucking hope ‘patriots’ her and her party representing this shithole of a country (scotland).
My partners english for fucks sake.
The uk as a whole should stop all this fucking bullshit and join together and deal with the real problems this country has at the moment.
18
Agreed. Canny stand the wee fishwifey.
4
Sturgeon makes Corbyn look like Mussolini.
And another thing: The Um Bongo drinker who won the Booker prize,droning on about being black. Shut up, get back to the plantation: The cotton will not pick itself.
Also, the Canadian woman who also won had an extinction rebellion sticker on. Walk from Toronto, did she?
Cunts.
Good morning.
35
Rather like the Irish Question of a century ago ‘ They don’t know what they want and they won’t be happy until they get it ‘.
25
Another bunch of cunts. So desperate are they to escape English “ domination” that they walk straight into the EU version of Colditz where you are shot for trying to escape. Idiots.
27
But they know how to fart for it…
1
We want out of the EU and Scotland wants out of the Union. No problem with it. Same for Wales, if the majority want to go their own way they should.
The UK is a tacky sounding country anyway.
The septic Isles as we now are, parts of the country resembling Asia more than the former U.K.
We are a crumbling civilisation and there’s no way back now. How long until parts of England make a serious bid for independence?
Our politicians now are cunts but we need to look at the politics of the post war governments who sold us down the river and created the environment that’s lead us here.
The seeds of our destruction were sown and nurtured long ago. So off you go Scotland if it be your will.
Is wee smells of piss Nicki and her socialist ideology the way to a better future? That’s the question Scots need to ask themselves.
17
Truth in every syllable, nicely put 6D
0
They wanted a once-in-a-lifetime vote and they were eventually given a once-in-a-lifetime vote but now, only a few years later they want another once-in-a-lifetime vote but what happens if that once-in-a-lifetime vote doesn’t go their way, will they want another once-in-a-lifetime vote?
19
Make it best of 3. 5. 7. 9………
Reminds me of another bunch of cunts whinging about the result of a vote.
20
Ah, but the once-in-a-lifetime vote related to a specific person who has now come to the end of his lifetime so now it refers to another old fart who’s end is nigh. On that basis they could logically demand a once-in-a-lifetime referendum every 45 minutes. As far as I’m concerned they can keep having referendums until they get the right result, as long as they pay for it, or they can have a referendum which includes England and we will tell them to fuck off.
14
Still laugh at the concept of the Scottish vote for independence being ‘once in a lifetime’.
‘And you may find yourself in a council estate, in a beautiful crack-addled flat, and you may ask yourself, “why is Nicola Sturgeon such an obnoxious cunt?” ‘
‘Letting the days go by’… etc etc.
20
This is not the majority of Scotland,
This is not my beautiful deep-fried Mars….
9
Good reference to the Heads there, Empire.
Scotland will keep demanding endless Referenda knowing they only have to win once to get their victory. As long as Scotland treats Westminster as a joke by electing large numbers of SNP MPs (just as England treats EU elections as protest votes) this will continue to encourage Krankie and Co.
Slippery Salmond is due in court soon isn’t he? That’ll be interesting……
8
Oh you’re fucking kidding me… I’ve got that blasting through the headphones as I read!!! 😎 One of the best bass lines ever committed to tape. 3 notes… all the way through, that’s it; to embellish it would be to diminish and demean it.
0
The easy way to get shot of them will be to ask the whole of the UK if they want to retain the Union. We all know what the answer will be, which is why we weren’t asked last time around.
12
Probably though Hinge and Brackett (aka Grieve and Benn) would not approve and so they would engineer a stop being put on it.
8
That’s quite an offensive sour comparing Grieve and Benn to Hinge & Brackett. Why must they suffer being compared to those two dreadful, old cabaret queens? If I were Hinge & Brackett I’d sue.
11
I believe either Hinge or Brackett is dead now, (so Mrs. Boggs tells me) but then again both Benn and Grieve look as if they had been embalmed . Pity the poor mortician who has to make them look lifelike! 🙂
7
Grieve, Benn and Letwin = The Three (EU) Stooges.
6
Its all Mel Gibson’s fault.
13
I fear that a no deal Indy could mean, like Northern Ireland, a return to terrorism, with the Scots raiding, pillaging and bleeding England dry.
Oh, wait a minute, isn’t that what already happens now?
9
Being serious for a moment, the SNP are playing a very dangerous game re: Brexit. What is to stop a future UK government or parliament pulling the same trick when and if Scotland votes for independence? If unpicking a relationship that is only 47 years old has defeated our shit-for-brains politicians, how are they going to undo a far more intimate union that is more than 300 years old – 400 if you count the union of crowns.
17
Shouldn’t they be carrying 4th Reich flags in that photo?
10
Has the Bride of McKrankiestein come out with older Scottish ‘No’ voters dying off, a la Brexit and the enlightened yoof now of age to rid them of Westminster and hopefully into the arms of Brussels? No wonder she is pushing for sixteen and seventeen year olds to be given a vote but haven’t they all got mental ‘elf ishoos and Brexit Derangement Syndrome? It could prove too much.
13
I don’t understand the connection with Catalan independence. Just all whingeing cunts together.
2
Scottish independence makes much more financial sense for us than it does for them:
https://fullfact.org/economy/how-barnett-formula-flawed-favour-scotland-and-northern-ireland/
And I guarantee that if they can con their way back into the EU, Brussels will be much less keen to featherbed their dysfunctional economy. No problem with a hard border, either. And 50 fewer cunt MP’s in the UK parliament, doing everything they can to stop it being the UK? Bring on the indyref, Jimmy, and hope you like the migrants.
My apologies to those cunters who live or have moved north of the border. It’s a great place, and the people are fine…except when they get whipped up by the indy crew. And the issue would have submerged if it had not been for the utter incompetence of our approach to Brexit.
17
Apology accepted Komodo. Living here, I sincerely believe that Scotland has a better standard of living than anywhere in the UK. This is partly due to low population density (I never see a traffic jam or have to wait for a GP appointment), “old fashioned” values (e.g., it is the most monocultural country in Europe) but mainly due to the generous Barnett formula. I think most of the Scottish electorate recognise this and will vote, once again, against independence. All that the SNP ideologues will achieve is the loss of more jobs as capital investment is withdrawn yet again.
Having never forgiven the Tories for the poll tax, the Scottish electorate keep voting in the SNP to run the show. This is the paradox that they alone need to figure out.
13
Glad to see your view, S-M. Would be living there still if I’d found gainful employment outside of the cities, and I don’t rule out going back if finances ever permitted. My finances, and Scotlands, both…
Hope you’re right about the vote. My experience is that the SNP always believe their own propaganda and peak too soon , so perhaps you are.
3
If the SNP get their way, it’ll be open doors for all following independence. It’s only the nasty Tories who are stopping Scotland’s population from growing now.
“Scotland urgently needs to grow our population – or we face a demographic timebomb over coming decades that could make it seriously challenging to fund public services like the NHS.”
https://www.commonspace.scot/articles/14461/snp-demands-immigration-powers-new-figures-show-scotland-set-lag-behind-european
7
I think the cuntstituency of Moray went quite Tory in 2017, and had the biggest proportion of leavers…
I think you’ve nailed it on the head, Sarge. England is bursting at the seams; there’s a bit more breathing space in Scotty.
1
I’m finding myself increasingly despising Scotland as a nation. My biggest regret in recent politics was that Scotland weren’t successful in their bid for independence.
On the very broad assumption that Scotland could have arranged a timely split from the UK, then it would have been fucking hilarious to watch wee Jimmee Krankee and sex-pest Salmond get crushed under the jackboots of Juncker, denying them a fast-tracked application to the EU, as well as the financial suicide of the collapsing oil prices (again, assuming Scotland successfully retained the oil resources as their exclusive assets).
Please Scotland, have another ‘once in a lifetiii-iime’ vote, vote out, and kindly fuck off and burn to death.
17
Good point re. oil prices. Most of the SNP’s momentum was built up when the price was over $100 a barrel and production from the North Sea high. The price for Brent crude today is $56/barrel and production is around a third of what it was in 2000. Exploration and production costs are also rising as less economic fields are developed in more difficult conditions. Salmond could make a good economic case for independence in the early 2000’s, more especially as Thatcher and her successors declined to use oil revenue for a sovereign wealth fund but simply spaffed it.
The SNP has not yet realised that those days are gone for ever.
7
They haven’t really forgotten. English “ theft” of “ Scottish oil” is another one of their many grievances.
6
If they go and the Irish and maybe with a little luck Wales, we can be ENGLAND!
I am English and I live in England, maybe then we could take back London and make it an English city again.
Bring it on
15
Scotland ….. Fuck off.
N. Ireland … Fuck off.
Wales ………. Fuck off.
Cornwall ….. Fuck off.
Get To Fuck.
12
What abaaaaht England?
4
you forgot the isle of wight jack?
1
The Scottish Nazi Party,once allied to The German National Socialist Workers Party are welcome to their “independence” tied to the fourth Reich.
8
The referendum had an 85% turnout and NO won by 55 to 45 but that still isn’t good enough for the Nazis. As usual people didn’t know the issues and they have changed their minds. They started screaming about a second referendum the day after the first one, just like the libtards did after the EU referendum and Trump’s election. Fuck me, they wanted Trump out 2 months before he took office.
We have to accept that the libtards are always right and it’s about time we adopted real democracy and just voted the way they want.
You know it makes sense.
17
Would it be a soft leave or a hard leave? Would they leave with or without a deal? Did they know what they were voting for?
It’s all bollocks.
9
If the Nazis want to win their “Indyref2” they should take advice from the Labour Party and the Muslim Council of Great Britain on election fraud.
The “Peterborough Effect.”
14
Talking of which, I see Cuntbyn’s got his soiled knickers in a twist because the government wants all UK voters to prove their identity. The stupid senile old twat has laughably said it was an attempt to “suppress voters” and “rig” the next general election result whilst coming out with this steaming pile of shit: “The people that the Tories are trying to stop voting will be disproportionately from ethnic minority backgrounds, and they will disproportionately be working class voters of all ethnicities.” Apparently it also discriminates against certain ethnic groups such as Gypsies and Irish Travellers as they are much less likely to have a passport. Well,actually, fuck ’em. I fail to see what is unreasonable about the plans, if nobody has a driving licence or passport they can apply for new form of identity document FREE OF CHARGE. If anyone wants to see the full article it’s on the Brussels Bullshit Corporation’s website.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-50051178
9
Steptoe is probably more worried that Mohammed and his families won’t be able to implement the Tower Hamlets voting pattern – vote early, vote often
5
The postal vote is where the vast majority of fraud takes place. If that isn’t tackled they’ll merely be scratching the surface.
That said photo ID would be a good thing imo.
7
“Papieren bitte!”
Never not never to fuckin’ bollocky never ever ever would I accede to such a thing. Before y’ know it it’s the full biometric Monty.
0
I hope they dont expect to get back in the EU, or anyone to bail out their 9% of GDP deficit.
Cunts.
7
Scotland certainly wouldn’t qualify for EU membership under current rules. To join, their deficit must be no higher than 3%. And they’d be paying nothing into the EU coffers, they’d be large Net EU recipients.
Despite that the 4th Reich might be prepared to bend the rules and let them in… if only to snub the UK… though stringent conditions would apply.
The EU are very good at changing the rules when it suits them.
They said about Article 50 (before it was triggered) that once triggered there would be NO GOING BACK and the UK would leave within two years, with or without a deal. 18 months later Article 50 had been bent out of all recognition to suit the EU and their establishment quislings in the UK Remain Establishment. Johnson continues to play the game.
10
They had better fucking hope that Saint Greta is right. If you’re going to be a third world country then you need the climate.
Cunts
7
I’d like to see Little Miss Thunderpants give a lecture in Aberdeen re the satanic qualities of Scottish crude.
4
The ‘marchers’ you see in every headline / TV footage, are the same fuckers everytime … ‘Rent a Braveheart’ crowd. They marched through our local city recently, and all but a handful were from out of town. There may heve been half a dozen locals. Once the march ended, they filed down to the rail station to catch trains and awaiting busses and fucked off. They try and get it across that the numbers you see marching are local and big in numbers …. are they fuck.
At our turn for the travelling circus, locally …. they (SNP) estimated 100,000 folk would turn out, … they claimed after the march was over there had been 200,000 … the police said that the number was in actual fact under 20,000 …. I know who I’d believe.
5
over representation of the Scotish voice is part of the problem, potentially leaving them holding the balance of power at Westminster, minorities dictating to the majority the story of our times
0
Once these parasites have been ditched, it will be an ideal situation to give assistance to the poorer areas of England and Wales which have been overlooked for many years.
We can than avoid the break up of England and Wales which is more of a threat to our future. Ignore the sheep shaggers of Wales, the greater part of the Welsh population are almost English!
1
That should read “ignore the sheep shaggers of North Wales.”
0
You’re not wrong mate, a lot of our incomers are English. Radio four has recently tried to play up the fact that Welsh independence is becoming more of an issue. What a load of bollocks. No one I know gives a fucking shit about it. But, if you chuck a couple of uppity wankers on the radio, with no right of reply, it sounds like we all want it. Lying fucking bbc. Even our shit politicians don’t mention it, other than minor protest party plaid, and they can fuck off.
3
Bravo, Ken! Pardon me, Ron.
Reading your nomination, I felt as though you were really there reporting and interviewing. 🙂
0
Did our roving reporter make few quid up there selling some cheap booze to the Scots. if it ever happens they will be banging VAT up to 25% to pay for all the freebies currently funded by the whole UK, so very easy to spend somebody else’s money and after a few years of that they will want another referendum to rejoin dear old Blighty
3
These cunts are like a broken record. A stuck, scratched up, fucking annoying “Donald, Where’s your Troosers?’ record, that is.
Just like the EU referendum Remoaners, these cunts want a second one that gives them the result that they want…..then it will be a third, then a fourth… and so on.
Kilt-flashing, Braveheart-quoting, haggis-scoffing tossers, all of ’em.
Please for the sake of fuck, someone give the whining cunts what they want, then when they cotton on that they really cannot manage their own shit without the help of those nasty, oppressive English bastards, we will have the pleasure of telling them to go and get fucked and that they made their tartan-quilted bed, so they can fucking well lie in it.
JEEZUS, the cuntery never fucking stops, does it??!!
2
“They may take our lives, but they will never take our freedom” –
An Australian
1