The Listening Project

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Radio Four’s ‘The Listening Project’ is long overdue a nomination.
I don’t know if it is still on, as I no longer listen to that crap station, but this pile of utter twattery, introduced by the smug, up-herself Islingtonian, Fi Glover, (herself worthy of a nomination) is the most puke inducing, self indulgent drivel ever committed to radio.
For anyone not familiar with this pile of cack, it features a recorded conversation, lasting for about four minutes, normally between two women (surprise? NOT), who no one has ever heard of, talking about crap which is of no interest to anyone except the two tossers doing the talking. Avoid at all costs if you want to retain your sanity. You’ll be taking a baseball bat to your radio otherwise.

 

Nominated by Mystic Maven

31 thoughts on “The Listening Project”

  1. I had a go at this very programme a week or two back. Doris and Ethel – recorded by BBC Radio Derby recall the thirty years they spent stitching knickers in a back street factory. Ethel cackles as she remembers the day her drawers fell down and Doris had to go and find her a safety pin. We were poor but we were happy.

    The worst ones are where you get a precocious brat straight out of the BBC Drama Repertory Company talking to mummy about how daddy lft them when he was 7 and how he and mummy have coped.

    Yes this shitfest still goes out Wednesdays at 10.55 (Jenni Murray gets back to the locker room for an early bath that day) Fridays at 4.55 and another at 11.55

    If you miss them then, you have a chance to improve your aim when all three are repeated on Sunday afternoon 2.45-3.00. The sig tune sounds like they are about to do Alice In Wonderland

    It is absolute bollx (there have even been a few Brexit specials and occassional half hour editions in the 9 a.m. week day slots.

    It’s cheap and it’s crap. I hope when they get a new Controller he (probably Mr Aziz) or more likely she (Lydia Bulldyke or Mr. Aziz’s wife) take an axe to the R4 schedule and get rid of some of the old crap that has been clogging the station up for years.

    • I don’t know how people listen to radio 4 anymore. To me it’s as bad as having to listen to LBC and James O’ Shitehead. Jenni fucking Murray. With her glasses perched on the end of her nose. I know a bit about her Mr Boggs. She comes from near where I live. As always it’s a reaction against her upbringing. Specifically her pushy mum. She was ‘head girl’ at her Grammar school. I don’t think there is any worse kind of voice than a person who comes from the North putting on a genteel accent. Parky was guilty as well.

      • I can imagine her as head prefect strutting about with different coloured BICs in her top pocket. Horrible woman (subject to confirmation, like the 1970s Russian athletes – there seems to be a fair bit of testosterone in there).

        The reason I have Radio 4 is that I have a rig up in my workshop where whatever is on in the house comes over my speaker. Mrs. Boggs likes Lezzie’s Hour for some reason. There are often times when it is switched off. There is so much tittle-tattle on the station, and would-be worthy but depressing shite – this morning at 11 a half hour documentary about a man who continues to swim despite his advancing Alzheimers. As I write the pointless 14 minute fill-in after the news is being filled by a darkie reading a misery memoir (that’s off here). For a few weeks they had some American tart wittering on about restoring her house, coupled with a bloke doing the same thing to the same house 200 years earlier. Utter crap.

        The trouble with R4 apart from it’s disgusting anti-Brexit bias, and it’s love of pooftah “moderates” and Westminster feminist dykes is that it is old and predictable. If it’s Monday it’s got to be Just A Minute or I Haven’t A Clue, if it’s Friday it’s got to be News Quiz or Now Show, leftwing fuckwits to a man and woman. Wednesday night, either Dame Joan Bakewell talking about death or Micheal Burke and his smug sanctimonious Moral Maze, and of course all the otherwise unemployed and unemployable old farts who just exist for R4 games and quizzes – Tony Hawkes bought out of the museum they store him in for Just A Minute, Martin Jarvis.

        There are so many lowlights now – 9 on Saturdays is unlistenable for an hour and a half with his group of gossips who could talk all day – if only they had something to say. That is often followed by some smug middle class cunt Jay Rayner with a “foodie” show – not to b confused with the foodie show that goes out on Sundays and Mondays.

        Sums up R4 really – middle class cunts drinking wine and enjoying haute cusine while they agonise over the lives of wimmin in slavery, with a daily visit to the Archers to let them drool over their window boxes.

        I can’t listen to LBC because of all the fucking adverts especially those speeded up ones – gabble, gabble, gabble, gabble – terms and conditions apply. Cunts

      • I could also nominate LBC for the mere fact that they now employ that smug, self indulgent, ex radio 4 tosser, Eddie Mair.

      • Really? I was relieved when he left PM because it became The Eddie Mair Show where his *humour* verged on the puerile. van Davis isn’t a whole let better, in fact it stays off these days because of the Remainer element. World At One usually gets the same treatment and the radio is off for Today 9 days out of 10.

    • So much on BBCunt Radio 4 is now a bunch of cunt. Fi Glover is detestable, her smugness rivals that of Libby Purves and Polly Toynbee. I cannot listen to her.

  2. You’re quite right. But having no baseball bat I was forced to use the big torque wrench. Most of R4 is now 2 or more wimminz chattering to each other: for equivalent entertainment see (1) bus queue (2) persons blocking aisles in Tesco. (3) freshly painted wall. But do be sure the wall isn’t white.

    There is also something involving R4 listeners submitting one-line accounts of something that happened to them that day. Sort of audio tweeting…”I watched paint dry all day. Feeling so relaxed now!” This too is mostly wimminz.

    And they appear to be having a season of dramatisations of US poof Henry James, who is, if I may quote Wikipedia, “best known for a number of novels dealing with the social and marital interplay between emigre Americans, English people, and continental Europeans”

    IOW, a touchy-feely globalist, eh?

    • Reading Henry James is like wading through a sewer choked with excrement and used toilet paper. Words, words and words following each other and going nowhere. James was inflicted on a whole generation of English students in the 1970s thanks to an prick Cambridge professor called F.R. Leavis who also championed bores like D. H. Lawrence, George Eliot, Joseph Conrad and the later unreadable novels of Dickens like “Bleak House”. He also hailed a poet called Ronald Bottrall who sank without trace. Leavis deserves a cunting to himself.

      • I’ve never even tried to read James. Much like Walter Scott in terms of readability, was my impression. Wondered who FR Leavis was. The name was never absent from the Grauniad, which was quite readable back then, but I hadn’t a clue. Literary critic must be among the world’s foremost non-jobs…suited to “a tiresome, whining, pettyfogging little pipsqueak”, as Edith Sitwell called Leavis. (Thx and a tip of the hat to Wikipedia)

      • So death arrives. ‘Ah, the distinguished thing’. His last words. Too much decorum. Obsessed with decorum.

        He comes from that East Coast Puritan aesthetical upper class. Eliot later.

        There is a story in Chesterton’s autobiography where he was entertaing the celebrated American writer. All about his ‘delicate observations’ and wanting to immerse himself in the atmosphere of Europe. Anyway, in walks Hilaire Belloc shouting for ‘beer and bacon’ dressed as a tramp. As Chesterton said volumes could be written about that encounter.

        America’s misunderstanding of ‘old Europe’.

      • That’s what lies behind the encounter Komodo. Looking for decorum, a genteel culture. Belloc from that old rugged care free manly adventurous old Europe.
        His most famous quote…I hesitate…Ruff Tuff might be listening….’The Faith is Europe. And Europe is the Faith’.

      • I am listening Miles. Fortunately for you, as a dangerous secularist I’m far too thick to understand what the fuck it means.

        Be seeing you… 🙂

        PS: regards to Komodo.

      • But after Henry VIII we ceased to be Europe as far as faith was concerned…and Belloc chose to live here…

        🙂

  3. Have heard of it but not actually listened to it. Sounds riveting.
    I start with Today with my coffee. That usually winds me up. Old style interrogation of politician cunts on the wane now, although Humphreys has his moments.
    The worst is Saturday mornings. Smug cunts giggling and patting each other on the back for an hour or more. I usually turn off until ‘from our own correspondent’ comes on, which is excellent.
    R4 is the only station I listen to but it is going down hill along the pc bollocks route.

  4. I tried reading Bleak House when I was still in school after the library at the leisure centre where I used to do judo had a copy going for free. Gave up less than halfway through because it was just so utterly boring and dire. Watching paint dry would’ve been more entertaining. Watching Geordie Shore would’ve been more intellectually stimulating. God I hated that book.

  6. Jesus fucking Christ.
    Bring back Mrs Dale’s Diary. Round the Horn with Kenneth Horn , Hancocks half hour and even Dick Barton. Those were the days when radio had any talent.

  7. Most women just talk bollocks anyway….as do most men…and as for anything in between,well,all they should be allowed to say is “Guilty,Your Honour.”

    i did enjoy “Cissie and Ada” with Les Dawson and Roy Barraclough,however. They were the only cross-dressers that I wouldn’t have horsewhipped through the streets….of course, I’d start with that fucking Mrs.Brown’s Boys Cunt. I fucking detest him,I’d still horsewhip that Cunt,whether he was Gayed Up or not.

    Fuck Off.

    • Barry Humphries aka Dame Edna Everage who I saw on London was also most excellent.

      Cannot think of any others though.

  8. I’d dearly love to avoid Radio 4 at all costs. Trouble is my bedside clock-radio wakes me up every morning at 6.30 with the Today fucking programme!

    Great cunting – caught a few minutes of The Listening Project several years ago… vacuous shite ^10.

    • PS: Today Programme was especially piss boiling this morning, but that’s another story. Think somebody has nominated it…

  9. A life long Radio 4 listener, I used to have it on all the time. Now, I find myself switching it off more and more. And I’m the sort of middle-aged, middle-class twat Radio 4 appealed to. Switch off programs are:

    The Listening Project
    Ramblings
    Women’s Hour
    1830 Comedy Slot – too many unfunny, shouty lezzas.
    Gardener’s Question Time (actually, a well produced program; I’m just not a gardener).
    Saturday Live
    PM (even worse with Evan Davies)

    Actually, I’m hardly listening to it at all…..

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