Greg Wallace [2]

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I know this waste of skin has been given a decent cunting before but it was a long time ago and he deserves to be cunted on a daily basis.

He is a humourless, talentless fucktard who prognosticates on others whose skills he could only dream of. He couldn’t boil a fucking kettle without burning the water. But he’s clearly up some cunt’s arse at the BBC who enjoys being reamed by this mono-syllabic bivalve.
He was on the Beeb again tonight mouthing more shit. This time about mince
pies which he described as being made of buttery flaky pastry. Every Englishman worth his salt knows mince pies are made from shortcrust pastry. He then derided the traditional English Christmas lunch. For fuck’s sake.

This cunting, worthless, mouth breathing streak of piss should be shot with balls of his own shite.

I rest my case.

Nominated by Pipesmoka

43 thoughts on “Greg Wallace [2]”

  1. An annoying cunt who has rightfully been outed as a TV face rather than a knowledgeable cunt.

    • A fucking bivalve hahaha. Poor fucker.Critics,but especially food critics boil my pash.Glutinous CUNT that’ll eat everything in site, then have the gall to criticise some of it. This Bivalve would be as happy with a Greggs Steak Bake as he would rimming his foodie critic partner.(which he does at every opportunity) Dirty little cunt….now get out of my fucking site.

  2. “Masterchef host Gregg Wallace’s restaurant goes bust with £300,000 debts
    The host of the BBC cookery contest has seen his second restaurant in a year shut down and his greengrocery business also crashed with huge debts”

    The Cunt is nothing more than a jumped-up barrowboy. He holds his cutlery like a 3 year old as he shovels food in while giving his “expert” opinion. Presumably the BBC employ him as a sop to those who say that the BBC is elitest. They obviously think that every working-class white male is a loudmouthed,ignorant pain in the arse,and so Wallace will appeal to them.

    How he has the nerve to stand there pontificating when it’s obvious from his record of restaurant failure and unpaid debts that he knows Fuck All about Fine Dining,is a mystery to me. The man must have the hide of a Rhino.along with the manners.

    I’d always thought that Chefs could be a volatile bunch,so it’s a great disappointment that one of them hasn’t kicked the Gobshite into a Coma. I’m almost tempted to enter “Masterchef” just to get within hoofing range of the bastard.

    Fuck him.

    • Your hoped for slanging match about religion didn’t come to much, Mr F.
      Maybe some football bollocks would elicit a more vociferous response?!
      People always seem to get their crotchless knickers in a twist about 22 millionaire dullards kicking a ball around a field.
      Here goes then:
      Aston Villa are the best!
      Er…or something.

      • Morning Dick, morning Mr Cunt Engine.

        Ipswich Town were better than Aston Villa once. But now they’re shite… as is Greg Wallace and Religion.

      • @Mr C-E,
        Hopefully it might stir itself up a bit tonight when a drop or two of liquid refreshment has been taken. I’d urge all concerned to at least try and drain the dregs left in those
        Sherry bottles from Christmas,or to finally down that cheap Polish lager that was bought in the unlikely event of receiving visitors.

    • Had a lovely landlords pie at the local last week, any traditional English fare would probably be considered not diverse enough for Masterchef ,Mr Fiddler. Especially battling the token towelhead’s curries or the bongo-bongo stewed pigs tails and trotters.

      • Morning L.L.

        I’ve noticed that all of these cooking programmes seem to favour our well-tanned compatriots.
        Most Dar kies favour “Long Pig” meat,of course…..cooked in a giant cauldron while they dance about, with bones through their noses, banging their spears on the ground….or deep fried chicken.

  3. Great cunting. I am 100% behind this.

    Are any other cunters irritated by this floppy-mouthed, potato headed, up-his-own-arse twat Gregg Wallace?

    Wallace is one of those TV non-entities that I simply cannot bear to watch.

    He is stuffed to the hilt of his own self-importance. The part that makes me want to scream is when it comes to judging the finished works of culinary art. Wallace loads up his fork with about a hundred-weight of the food, disengages his jaw and flips the top half of his head back like a ravenous puffadder about to consume a baby warthog and gently guides the fork in.

    Then he deliberately masticates in an oh such purposeful manner, knowing that the suspenseful outcome will not be announced until he is satisfied that he has masticated sufficiently, swallowed the food down his big fat, bald, toad-like cuntish head and passed judgement.

    He has a mouth reminiscent of Jonathan King’s which is seemingly purpose built for dispensing large amounts of food. That and his utter arrogance makes me want to prepare a nice big fat cream cake with a sweet nitro-glycerin sauce that he could wolf down.

    Tosser.

    • You need to find a more WordPress-friendly way of writing “ni**er”, Mr Maskinback!

    • because sometimes you use naughty words and your post gets sent into quarantine.
      we then look at it and then release it (or edit it and release it, or if its really naughty delete it)

      • If you have a moment Admin, could you advise as to what was really naughty about my emergency Anna Sourbry nomination? Cheers.

      • Ditto. My post above was littered with the normal fucks, cunts and wankers, etc but no pejoratives offensive to any minority group.

      • Afternoon RTCP….
        I’m hoping your Anna Soubry cunting makes the front page!!
        I’m keeping my powder dry…,,, 😡

      • Afternoon Q…. I wouldn’t hold your breath – for an emergency Cunting posted 42 hours ago it must be well past its appearance date by now.

        Have a feeling it was probably too hot for the ISAC lawyers to handle… if I were you I’d snort that powder before one of us dies…

        😎😜😂

        Meanwhile Bercow has this afternoon come out in his true Remoaner colours, blatantly manipulating parliamentary procedure in favour of scuppering Brexit – he even tried to pretend that ‘Bollocks To Brexit’ sticker was on his wife’s car and not his, ffs!

        If ever there was a case for an emergency Cunting, it’s now with John Bercunt…

        PS: No doubt I’ll find he’s been nominated while I was fucking around posting this comment. 🤤

  6. I only ever tasted one mince pie in my life and vowed never to do it again, so I can’t really comment about what kind of pastry should be used. But apparently we have a resident expert on ISAC who should be able to give us a definitive answer.

    Over to you MPG.

    • Every purchased mince pie I’ve tried has been utter shite compared to the family recipe one we have. All I know is that the mix we use has sherry in it and I can/have eaten an entire plate of them in one go. The pastry is denser too, not the fluffy sugary store shite.

    • Hi Allan.
      Mince pies are the desserts of the Gods .
      The pastry has to be light and fluffy but the most important part of the pie is that it’s made with love.
      A good filling also helps.

  8. Don’t mind Greg Wallace. Fairly blunt and straightforward.

    Guys done ok for himself up until recently.

    Not aware of his political stance.

  9. This fella is a cunt and a shit shag, apparently.
    A local young lady from my parish once dated this knob spot.
    Greg had his wicked way then dumped the poor damsel, she was half his age, by the way.
    Once they had parted company , she sold her story to one of the Sunday rags.
    Tart.

  10. I have always been perplexed as to why this unqualified billiard ball was selected to judge people’s cooking skills.

    Where the fuck did they find him?

    All I know is that he was a bloody greengrocer. It would be like putting me on the box with my ‘would burn water’ and ‘beans on toast is my speciality’ cooking skills to replace Delia Smith. What the fuck does he know about it and how many (ahem) ‘favours’ did he do for BBC executives to get that job??

    Don’t like him at all. His big, faux cockney piehole makes me switch over as soon as I hear the cunt.

  11. I’ve never heard anyone say: “So Greg, exactly WHAT is an ingredients expert?”

  12. He’s a cunt onto his fourth wife, half his age, like that fucking jaw slapping cunt Torode, another shag addict (although quite like new totty) then that cunt Monica galetti, what a fucking smarmy condescending cow. Then Hollywood, cradle snatcher, Worral Thompson, shopping amnesia issues, da Campo, convicted burglarizer and cunt. They’re all shite, Thomasina miers has let herself go after spawning, that oirish ones not bad and fucked off the locals by bagging a brace of pheasants, Martin’s a tedious petrolhead. And apparently billiard ball head likes to go commando. Delia, for god’s sake come back!

    • Yeh, amazing how many young, fit women display yo-yo knickers tendencies around this r.sole.

      The males of this genre are invariably Look At Me I’m Great degenerates. Cunts. Never watch them.

      The women? Mary and Delia are perfectly ok and never show off…..and I’d wager that only Mince Pie Guy on here would kick Nigella out of bed!?

      • Nigella has got an arse the size of Belgium tho. Watched her making a flan years ago, the size of tin? I find nine inches more than sufficient. Wot a tart!

      • Nigella better not try getting into my bed… I’d don my golfing shoes and kick her smug face and cunt in all night long given half the chance.

        And that Remoaner cunt Delia – she’d need a lot more than cosmetic surgery by the time I was finished with her.

        Sleep well Cunters.

  13. Don’t start me on that nasally, midget-faced cheese-thief Worrall Thompson.

    Cunt.

  14. This fat overly opinionated cunt should be worrying about where the nearest defibrillator is not ramming another mince pie down his neck…..
    He’s such a worthless cunt I can’t be arsed to cunt him properly…….
    Excellent cunting 👍

  15. Before I read the comments on this cunt I’ll just say – pie faced, talentless shouty mouthed cunt

  16. This cunt got his tattoo’s lazered off.
    Cunt best never set foot in Bermondsey again the fucking turncoat cunt

  18. He is a tumshie heid.
    Carved like someone’s Halloween nightmare.
    If only Hammer films were still going he would have constant employment as the Igor or fat Zombie.
    So long as was not required to say more than “Duh?” Cos his vocabulree is so limited.

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