Charity Adverts [2]

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CHARITY ADVERTS

They piss me off so much – ( poor Mtebe having to walk miles for a pint of diseased liquid) , but I smile to myself as I think of my version:

Adults are suffering in England today due to huge taxes and over-crowding caused by unchecked immigration.

GeeDee has to drive to Tesco every day ( a round trip of six miles ) just to buy his essential bottles of the cheapest wine – three bottles
in total. He has to do this day in and day out just to keep himself topped up.

But by texting WINO on your phone and pledging just £50 a day, he could have three bottles of a top quality wine delivered via the internet and not have to go through the stress of driving and parking his car every day. This will keep him safe and warm this winter

Thank you.

Nominated by GeeDee

69 thoughts on “Charity Adverts [2]”

  1. A very wry bit of cunting GeeDee.
    It touches on a more serious question of course. I’m not sure of figures (somebody might know) but I believe that since 1945, Africa has received a c. a trillion dollars worth of aid. Many parts of it are still disease ridden, corrupt, war ravaged shitholes. Are we throwing good money after bad??

    • The West has poured $2.3 trillion into Africa over the past 50 years (as of 2006) and STILL the Africunts are all over my telly with their bag of bones babies telling me that all they need is another £3.00 a month… FFS, the African continent should be a mega South Korea ^10 economic tiger by now, organising food parcels and aid to the basket case food bank infested UK!

      PS: Clegg just stated: “Paddy Pantsdown was the reason I went into politics.”

      Paddy is now burning in Hell, presumably.

      • 2.3 trillion….got to say I didn’t know that amount. A couple of things have struck me about these ad’s. 1, Move closer to the fucking water idiot. I mean it ain’t as if it’s going to be hard to take a few sticks and a bit of mud to make a new hut. 2, Who is the cunt filming all this shite? I mean there they are banging on about poor little Umbongo and the trek she has to make daily, or some Lidl donkey (nice Christmas song). “forced” to carry a back breaking load, and these cunts are filming it and no doubt staging it to dramatise it all the more. Let me be the first to pledge a cunting for every ad, every cunt that knocks on my door and every twating envelope begging that arrives.

      • whoops … wrong area – sorry Ruff Tuff.

        But I have taken in the 2.3 trillion …… This really gets peoples
        heads around that amount of money… I’m not going to do it again – but imagine counting out ONE dollar/pound every second. then work out how long that would take in years – it’s abominable (simple thing on computer calculator) …… as if you didn’t know —– this really makes you think how much money has been soaked into this shit hole

      • “the west has poured in” (not) But I have taken in …..
        Christ …too much wine …too many corrections

  2. Fuck knows who this GeeDee cunt is but he needs to sober up and fuck off while he’s doing it.

    Why do I get the feeling that some cunt is taking the fucking piss out of me?
    Mug some other cunt off GeeDee ok?

  3. I would willingly piss in any hole in the ground so that little Mtebe and his little onions can drink all day long !

  4. Africa is an evolutionary dead end. It’s about time we stopped paying for the thick bastards to have more kids they can’t pay for, they’ve had enough time to sort their shitholes out.

  5. I enjoyed this one.

    I absolutely love humour that takes virtue-signaling and flips the cunt on it’s head.

    Firstly it’s funny.

    Secondly it winds-up (triggers) flakes!

    The more we take the piss out of PC bullshit and neo-liberal cuntitude the less hold it will have on society.

    Magic!

    • Cheers Rebel – at least I made somebody laugh – which was the aim.
      And the whole thing is kind of based on what I do – Nuffink wrong with that?

      • Very funny cunting GeeDee,

        I’ve just texted WINO. May I recommend the Chateau de Cunt taken with a nice juicy Rump Steak.

        Make sure you needlessly throw some away though. That way you’ll enjoy even more!

      • Cheers CuntyMcCuntface

        Thanks CMC
        I will take note of your very tasty rumping, and chuck away half of it – there’s a nice buzzard in the sky I see every day – and I would like to see him feeding on it.

    • Stonewall. Weren’t they an AIDS charity? See it’s all linked. There’s a progressive continuum from homosexual ‘liberation’ to transgender ‘rights’.

  7. These Africa charities really make me laugh. Little um bongo has to walk 22 miles each day in the blazing sun, just to get clean water!. Ok 3 things, um bongo doesn’t go to school so what else who he be doing anyway? Secondly, go later in the day when it’s cooler, and finally why not move closer to the water supply? .Thick Pat Boone cunts! Merry fucking Christmas!

  8. Reminds me of that classic: “Young Mwembe has one arm and one leg. He has to ride twenty miles per day to collect shit-addled water in a bottomless bucket and has to ride through lion-infested grassland on a rusty bicycle with buckled wheels, some string for a chain, no seat and has to use pebbles for brake-pads. Please will you just donate £5 and we’ll send you the footage, it’s cunting hilarious”.

  9. Good Cunting, GeeDee.

    The trouble with so many of these Starvin’ Marvin type ads is that people have become inured to pictures of pot-bellied,fly-blown black babies. What we once found shocking has,through over-exposure,become…boring. Add the fact that everyone has had enough of shovelling money at a problem which is unsolvable. Indeed,all the money does is prolong their cycle of over-breeding.

    The fact that most of these adds are fronted by virtue-signalling,”celebrity” Wankers ensures their unpopularity too,I reckon.

    Fuck them.

  10. They cant stop shagging and firing out more fucking mouthes to feed, african counries have the highest population growth.
    They need to stop shagging, build a decent infrastructure and economies, but its impossible with thier inbred corruption.
    BTW, cut the foreign aid budget, 0.7% GDP would go a long way to sorting out the mess we have here….
    And give the liberal snowflakes something else to cry about
    Cunts

    • Cheers ‘OC’ !!! ……As I’ve said earlier, I don’t post that often so it is good to get positive feedback. Strange I pissed off Freddie the frog
      GeeDee

  12. They should make a charity for starving actors:-
    “Dominic West calls for new Bond to be transgender”

    Career slowing up a bit, Dominic? Arsehole.

    • Evening, Capt. M

      There was some straight actor by the name of Darren Criss in the paper yesterday saying that he wouldn’t play any more Gay parts.

      I’d have thought that the whole idea of “acting” is pretending to be someone who you are not.

      The Arts seems to be infested with virtue-signalling,rampaging Wankers.

      • Good evening Mr Fiddler, I trust you will be out tomorrow night, black cape billowing in the wind, swordstick tripping up drunks who get too close for a hug because ‘its Christmas’. Maybe piercing some inflatable snowpersons and scattering some tacks on the drives to deliver some Christmas cheer of village brats with expensive bikes. Ho Ho ,and fuck off of course.

      • Evening, L.L.

        Tomorrow is a busy day for me. I have made a scarecrow dressed as Santa. I plan to time my exit from the pub to coincide with the finish of the village Panto. The sight of a Massey tractor with Santa impaled on the front-end bale-spike weaving it’s way past the childish throng should wipe the smile off a few happy,shining faces….especially with me leaning out of the cab bellowing my traditional Season’s Greeting of “Fuck Off,you sponging bunch of Cunts”.

        Fuck them.

      • Funny, I’d imagined you as a spiteful and cynical part-time Santa at Kirkharle Courtyard shopping centre, Mr Fiddler, getting the kiddies on your knee and telling them that you don’t exist and that they’re going to get jack shit in their stocking this year and every year from now on, kind of like Bad Santa:
        https://youtu.be/PW4RI2rGMt8
        If you haven’t seen this movie…it’s just brilliant!

    • It wouldn’t surprise me if they did go with a transgender 007. The right-on unicorn saddlers will be wanking into their granola bowls. Bond is no longer allowed to shoot villains. He has to calmly use soothing words of trust and be kind to the bad guys.

      Titles are already being thrown around: “The Spy Who Deeply Offended Me”, “Snowflakes Are Forever”, “The Gender-Fluid Citizen With The Pink Beret”, “Never Say Anything Remotely Upsetting Again”, “Licence To Be Shocked At Everything”, “Virtue Signaller Royale”. The list goes on…

  13. I was watching an old Theroux docu on Netflix the other day. About the townships in South Africa. The squalor, the violence, the poverty etc.

    All I could think was ‘fuck me – it’s nearly as bad as Catford’

  14. That lipstick wearing and painted nails cunt Izzard is constantly on the scrounge for the Yemen.

    I’d like to see him go over there.
    They’d take one look at the cunt and throw him off the nearest multi-storey….

    • He did go there JR. in the advert you see him without his slap on and almost looking butch the fucking fraud.

  15. As soon as the saintly Ewan McGregor implored me to give generously i recoiled forever. One more odious snowflake in an occean of ‘celeb’ snowflakes.

  16. What all this charity has actually done is increased the population of Africa from 120 million in 1900 to 1.2 billion now. Result, Africans flooding West cos Africa is fucking full to the brim of people who can’t survive their and want some of that good old western culture.

    Aid has not reduced the problem, just made it shot loads bigger.

  17. Quite apart from what we give these charities, the UK gives out about £14 billion a year in overseas aid. Our money is being wasted on shitholes while our old folk are neglected, while people wait months if not years for operations, while room can’t be found for criminals in our crumbling overcrowded prisons.
    This isn’t a joke, this is serious.

    • Spot fucking on Allan.

      Some Lib Dem cunt drove the Bill through Parliament a few years back that committed them to spend .7% of GDP, that’s our money on foreign aid, so he could feel better about himself.

      No doubt when the cunt was or is inevitably voted out of Parliament he’ll have secured himself a nice big pay cheque as the boss of one of these Gravy Trains.

      My Dad died just under a year ago and his condition (dementia) was made much worse by the lack of intervention.

      It’s a long story but one anyone whose cared for a relative with the condition will be familiar with.

      My point is the cunt Osborne cut so many services in the name of austerity that the services that were once there, that would have assisted my Dad in making better choices and just generally having more support were stripped right back.

      Dementia is a degenerative disease that only has one outcome but it’s decline can be managed but my Dad, who’d worked since the age of 15 and payed shit fucking loads in tax over his life was denied crucial intervention so some fucking NGO payed by Oxfam could abuse vulnerable kids in Umbongo Land or some Well could be built so that Ngonbo didn’t have to walk 5 miles for a bucket of Bison piss.

      Ive heard these bastard cunts defend Foreign Aid by saying it gives the U.K. soft power around the world. Really, fuck soft power, I’m an advocate of Nukes and looking after your own.

      • My dad died from complications from his dementia nearly 2 years ago, hospital basically said you take him home, don’t ring us again! They put him in a care home an hour’s drive away. I say care home, no doubt it was run by some fat cunt bitch.you know the sort, only ever sees £ signs no matter who she talks to. Anyway went to see dad first day down in this home, you know what wouldn’t even have let my dog stop where they put him, and I haven’t even got a dog! We were disgusted, then they sent some Nigerian nurse to talk us round! Really! Really? We insisted dad come home with us, basically they said FUCK U,he has a fall again don’t call us! The private health care sector is a fuckin cunt £800 a week where the fuck are the regulators? No,easier to fuckin say people don’t understand dementia patients. FUCK OFF they’re still fuckin human beings you CUNTS

      • A depressing but all to familiar story Cuntosaurus.

        If I took anything from the 2/3 year battle i had with the NHS it was that they really don’t give a fuck, no cunt is accountable, they’re massively overstretched, there’s no joined up thinking and at all costs they just want to get the patient (your relative) the fuck out of their care.

        My Dad had over 20 admissions in the last year of his life, mainly due to falls but each time he went to hospital it was treated as a new case, no link was made, no effort expended in trying to understand why so many falls.

        I suspected then and am convinced now that it’s a deliberate policy as it negates the need for any further investigation.

        And you’re right about the ‘Care Homes’. Fucking shitholes, understaffed, badly maintained, show me the money.

        Even though I’m not religious I pray I don’t end up in that position.

      • Speaking as someone who is in the early stages of dementia – although getting a diagnosis is a fucking mine field in itself – I would abolish the aid budget overnight and work on the basis that charity begins at home.

        And don’t start me on Oxfam. Years back they wanted me to work on an IT project to put computers into African villages to speed up their accounting thus putting the locals who they were employing out of a job. Then they tried to knock my rate down by telling me every £1 they knocked off my hourly charge would feed a starving African family for a week. Fundamentally disagreeing with their priorities I told them to stick their job.

        Clegg demanded the 7% as a condition for joining the coalition government and look what a roaring success that was.

        I give to cancer research shops, Great Ormand Street, and the local hospice. The rest of them can fuck right off…

  19. France’s President Emmanuel Macron has said he deeply regrets President Donald Trump’s controversial decision to withdrawal all US troops from Syria.

    I and many others deeply regret the fucking cunt otherwise known as Emmanuel Macron.

  20. “Police investigating the chaos and disruption at Gatwick Airport have admitted there may never have been a drone at all”.

    I truly fucking despair of this once great country. Piss up/Brewery phrase springs to mind.

    • Yet they managed to produce photographs and…..stated quite clearly that a third arial drone was seen at 09.38 , and tracked by security . A bullshit story, so desperatly needed now the Novochok shite is forgotten ! Deep State ? Fuck em. Merry Xmas Sausage

  21. FFS!!
    This threads a fucking gem …
    I just wished umbongos dad would stick something on the end of it , that would go a damn sight further to sorting things out than pestering us fucking senseless to send cash into the bottomless pit……

  22. Feed the World? Fucking bollocks to that. Scruffy Cunt Geldof’s Geld could be put to far better use to help the macaroons.

    I would set up a number of pre-fab clinics across the sub-Saharan shitfest. Each clinic would be staffed by a surgeon, aneathetist and a nurse.

    M’Tembe Senior would enter to collect his 10kg hessian sack of Uncle Ben’s long grain finest. In exchange for the quarry, M’Tembe’s plums would be removed by the crack surgical team and his ballbag sewn up post haste.

    Everyone would be a winner. The UK population wouldn’t be pestered for cash donations. M’Tembe could make a few maggot risottos for his family. M’Tembe could then bang the fly-blown mutton shutters off Mrs M’Tembe as many times as he wants without producing offspring. The fly-blown population would eventually die away.

    And cunts like Knob Gelded would eventually fail to profit from M’Tembe’s misery.

    I see no disadvantages in my proposal. It is much more humane than anything any other well-meaning cunt has dreamed up.

  23. Advice to all mothers with little Um Bongos – keep your black legs closed you stupid slappers. That should solve the problem. Advice to all fathers of little Um Bongos – keep it in your trousers you cock for brains retards. That should solve the problem.

  24. Fuck me!!
    We’ve had the East African appeal quickly followed by the West African appeal, what next ? Maybe the south East African appeal or north by north west African appeal!!!
    These un bongos are boxing the compass….,.
    I’m gonna make my own appeal
    LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!! 😂

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