For my debut cunting, I would like to nominate: Breeders.
Now, before any parents start getting their knickers in a twist, I’m not generalising breeders as a whole, I’m not referring to “normal” parents, the types that discipline their children when it is required, raise them correctly, teach them manners, keep them out of the way of others, etc – I’m talking about these modern-day cunts, these limp-wristed, shaggy-haired, Labour-voting, Guardian-reading, stay-at-home, beta male, dad cucks, with their comfortable sandles, poxy checkshirts and cargo shorts, driving around in a fucking Nissan Qushqai, complete with a “Baby on Board” sign in the back, with his dowdy, frumpy, tired, frizzy-haired excuse of a woman, on the way to the nearest city or town for lunch at Giraffe Cafe, a browse, a shitty Costa Coffee (Mummy and Daddy have been up all night too, you know) and a Babychino for the little prick, and to chit-chat with other miserable fucks of the same description. “It’s great being a parent, isn’t it? I don’t miss chasing my dream, being creative, travelling, having a ton of expendable cash and freedom, non siree, not at all. I love getting up three times a night, changing shitty nappies, watching kids TV and playing with a plastic xylophone. When the kids are asleep, I log on to my sad social media page to call people I’ve never met racists and bigots. Life has never been better”, they tell each other, as they gingerly sip their Flat White’s, hoping the little bastards in the pushchairs aren’t going to wake up anytime soon.
These selfish cunts walk around with their heads up their arses for the entire duration of their stay, pushing the buggy wheels into the ankles of unsuspecting members of the public, getting in the way, openly breastfeeding, subjecting the surrounding area with the piercing screams and running around of their offspring and that god-awful child tone that all modern parents seem to have, “Do you want to do a pooooooooo, do you?” and expecting people like me to move out of the way or give up my seat so their lives can be made a little easier – NOT on my fucking watch. You (selfishly) chose to bring that mewling cabbage into existence without it’s consent, I shouldn’t have to suffer because of your poor choice,. You’re on a fucking ego trip and wanted to create a mini you so you can upload pictures of it and your ugly mug on Facebook for all your other equally retarded friends to “like”. Oh, and stop attempting to be eco-friendly, you’ve already fucked that up by not going through with the abortion, no amount of recycling and going vegan whenever you fancy it at the time isn’t going to reverse the damage.
Go fuck yourself and your disgusting spawn. You Cbeebie lookalike, flappy-cunted, hypocritical cunts.
The same applies for the “lower” members of society. Unemployed, scrounging, white-trash, peasants that surround the benches outside Poundland with pushchairs and stuffed plastic bags, sporting trackie bottoms, dirty neon-coloured vests, furiously stuffing roast chicken flavoured crisps into their toothless gobs and smoking seemingly endless amounts of cheap fags whilst their visually impaired, malnourished brats run around like tasered gibbons. They’ll proceed to the nearest reasonably priced public house, where the kids will be fucking around, swigging back blackcurrant Fruit Shoots, and the adults pints of flat Fosters, talking exceptionally loud about how wonderful it is that Aimee-Leigh is having another baby, despite being thirteen years old. These ITV2-addicted, freeloading miscreants are parasites, and due to the the lack of critical thinking, education and logic, and knowing full well they’ll be looked after by the taxpayer, the cycle of procreating will continue – and this is only the first world.
What a sad time for human existence. Cunts.
Nominated by Lord Cuntony
Because she works for William Hill my sister deals with those ‘lower classes’ all the time. They are indeed cunts. We have quite a lot at the pub I work at in the afternoons as well but thankfully I’m in the kitchen so don’t have to deal with the cunts.
13
God that makes me sound fucking snobbish now I look at it – perhaps ‘underclasses’ would be a better term?
8
What about disease or cancer?
1
People’s definitions differ, but I’ve always considered the ‘lower classes’ as benefit cheats, workshy dossers, doleites, criminals, lazy gimmegrants, pregant-for-council-houses, druggies and the like.
So ‘lower classes’ is apt. I however prefer ‘shitheel cuntfuck scum class’.
14
There’s an early episode of Red Dwarf where the crew play some kind of immersion video game, and they can fantasise for whatever they wish to become ‘reality’. Rimmer, true to form, can only imagine bad things happening to him, and one of those fantasies includes him ending up as a breeder with a woman who hates him, with endless kids running around, screaming and uncontrollable.
I remember seeing that image at 9 years old and it stuck with me. I too could not think of anything more hellish than some boorish, self-entitled cunt of a wife barking the orders and rearing children who would grow up to fucking despise me – probably for being a white male, judging by the rate at which liberal extremists are indoctrinating today’s youth.
Selfish, sharp-elbowed, draining on local services, destroying the peace and tranquility for all and purely in the name of some selfish fucking ego trip to re-populate the village with hideous images of themselves. Breeders are indeed stake-burning worthy cunt nominees.
13
I remember the Breeders… That horrible ‘Cannonball’ record… They were fucking shite…
4
Their cover of the whos so sad about us wasn’t so hot either, the breeders were just a feminine throwback to the pixies kim deals previous band
2
I really must take you to task on two matters your Honourablness. First, cigarette is a cuntable noun and should be qualified by number and not quantity; thus “endless numbers of cheap fags”. Contrast this with tobacco which is an uncuntable noun; thus “endless amounts of tobacco”. Secondly, the word missing from your cunting that immediately springs to mind when talking of the lower members is “obese”. This is particularly so of the female lower members. Not only, your Honourableness, are they cunts but they are fucking fat, lard-arsed, cellulite dimpled, rancid, greasy haired cunts. Thank you.
11
Fim, ‘greasy-haired’ should be hyphenated as it’s a compound adjective. Also, the full stop after “obese” should be inside the speech marks. Otherwise, carry on.
1
Yep. Typo for the adjective. The full stop – disagree but can’t be bothered to explain why. Rely upon your magnanimity to agree that we differ.
1
Outstanding my Lord Cuntony, outstanding.
Good afternoon.
8
The biggest breeders by far are the people from the country just West of India. They pop the future terrorists out one after the other, twice in the same year like Irish twins. By the next generation they will have shat out for more than the native British family. Similar to faeces laced with the eggs of black flies, eggs impatient to hatch, they will spawn further until indigenous people are on the edge of society, scratching their arses as peasants, as the ever-flowing fountain of money saturates their ankle-biters and tawdry living standards.
11
Forever grateful for small mercies, I am truly glad of the fact that I will be long dead before the UK endures the hell of the Towelhead Takeover.
15
You’d better be over 50 then, Empire. Under 50 and you’ll be toiling for your -kisthani overlords who have kidded and convinced themselves that they’re hard done by and are rightfully seeking revenge.
8
Emergency cunting for Emily Dawes, president of Southampton University Students Union who states that she will deface a WW1 Memorial painting depicting an unknwon soldier receiving a degree.
She should be grabbed from her comfortable privileged surroundings, taken to Afghanistan where our lads have been/are serving, sent into the field, and then if anything is left, handed to the Taliban.
Total and utter disrespectful CUNT
Big Al
47
Great minds. Just penned a page of vitriol on the Noms against this arrogant, disgusting piece of fucking shit.
16
Probably doing it for the cheap attention – she wants her 15 minutes, backed up with all the other libtard cunts on social media.
Shame someone doesn’t find out where she lives and sprays graffiti on her home and/or car for being a complete cunt.
I bet she would quickly shit herself if this country was ever invaded and her life was threatened by the fucktards she (and others) are so desperate to protect!
Hope she is stabbed to death, cunt!
12
This equine faced harlot with the dyed blonde hair and one working brain cell is a fan of folk music and the Southampton University feminist society which in this Black history month will be discussing ‘our curriculum – is it diverse?’ Words fail me. My knuckles are bruised and bleeding from punching the kitchen wall in an uncontrollable rage. Is this bawd receiving any public funding to keep her in a place of supposed higher learning?
This tart tweeted “mark my words – we’re taking down the mural of white men in the uni Senate room, even if I have to paint over it myself” The “white men” are Poet Laureate Robert Bridges; Nobel Prize winner (Physics) John William Strutt and botanist Sir Francis Darwin (son of Charles Darwin). It shows a kneeling uknown soldier receiving his degree. It was painted by Sir William Rothenstein in 1916 in honour of all the “white men” who left their university studies for the mud and carnage of the Western Front. Many, of course, never returned.
This ignorant, arrogant, disrespectful demimondaine should be fucked off out of it by the University today!
21
I hope she is multi-raped by her non-white rapeugees and then stabbed and set alight.
Cunt
17
Why don’t you just say what you’d like to happen NoCunt. Don’t mince your words.
14
The disrespect is creeping through our country like knotweed. I note with disgust how not a single newscaster wore the poppy yesterday, all day. Today the 25th is of course the start of the official poppy appeal but at one time it was rather like Bonfire night and most people wore them the month of October through to the 11th. If I see a white poppy wearer out and about they had better stand by.
12
Cunto, I was out and about today around the Naseby battle field and the Cross of St George was flying high in the sunshine. Glorious it was. Not a libtard in sight.
11
Give her a hard kick in the cunt just after she is circumstised buy one of her idols.
Then be sure to wash your shoes.
12
She’s straying into dangerous there, Big Al. These cunts can deface what they like, but disrespect the cenotaph or the Glorious Dead, then you’re in a world of shit.
11
Mummy and daddy (or is that mater and pater) must be so proud to have reared such a vile, ignorant, racist, misandric, ungrateful, self-serving waste of haemoglobin.
Her comments are far worse and much more deserving of punishment than those of the moron on the Ryanair flight but I’ll wager that she escapes any meaningful form of censure. That’s how it is in our broken land.
8
Good shout. Liked the Bill Hicks line thrown in there too.
You’d think it were the pinnacle achievement of humanity to phunk out one of these dreg seedlings. Unfortunately for a lot of these people it is the achievement of their lives, marginally more impressive than their £2 win on the daily handful of scratchcards.
8
Best. Cunting. Ever.
8
Nice cunting.
I believe it was Oberon Waugh (please correct me if I’m wrong) who stated, ” I was terrified of my father and, by god, my children will be terrified of me!”
Make a father slightly kinder and *that’s* how to bring up a child.
Put in the fair but very firm disciplinary work at toddler age and your child will blossom into a fine, upstanding adult.
9
Mumsnet needs a cunting. Am I Being Unreasonable in saying your a lot of self entitled cunts. ‘Oh it’s just too stressful with this new au pair’. Darling husband has been working on our new extension…'(just to show the size of the house). All on message as regards Brexit, immigration. Mrs Plastic is on it now. She’ll lean over soon and I’ll have to listen…If she only knew…
8
I’m guessing that introducing Mrs. Plastic to ISAC’s esteemed halls of cunting would be a step too far..?
6
It has been suggested previously by one of the esteemed cunters that ISAC should be called Cuntsnet. Not a bad idea.
12
I bet Darling Husband’s been “working” on the new au-pair.
And, if they’re anything like some that I’ve seen around, who can blame him. I’d do my little bit for diversity, if dished up appealingly…
Won’t be long before Mumsnet is Imamsnet.
11
First rule of Fight Club :
Don’t hold it in the Saudi embassy.
11
3nd rule of Fight Club.
Don’t let the Turks record it.
13
Gents I am all to keep the crazy cow from grabbing the phone and her having her say. Then I am sure Admin would get involved. ‘So what’s your Dick Fiddler have to say today then…?’ and ‘Sitting there all day trying to think of something clever’ Well, I’m not sitting here trying to come up with something truly asinine am I?I would like to say. But I hold my peace. She’s jealous.
11
Robert De Niro was almost bombed, I’m certain it wasn’t for his anti-trump stance and it had more to do with a those recent cash ins shite films hes doing lately
Seriously tho i’m calling this bomb thingy a hoax now 1 mega billionare 9 democrats and one celeb almost bombed no one exploded. Packages are hot tracked nowadays cameras are everywhere the post office wouldn’t have such a cold trail on this suspected MAGA bomber, This bomber is either a genius or its the feds and fbi hoaxing this to make trump look bad before the midterms convince me otherwise
14
My thoughts exactly.
Trying to smear Republicans, and a load of senile old gits like clitworm and sorearse will get more security…
4
Yeah, all too neat and convenient for me. Looks like a libtard stitch up.
Everybody knows these rich cunts don’t open their own post, they have skivvies for that sort of thing.
It’s bullshit.
9
Thinking of Mr Plastic. As a side cunting as it were. Compatible we are not. We disagree on absolutely everything-politics, religion, everything- what to watch, where to go. Drunken fights (that’s why I was arrested recently). I think we agree on what to eat.Compatible we are not. Thank God. Thank God! Yes I would much prefer it to(I have a favourite big word I can use here) the uxorious couple who are so compatible. The couple who are ‘best friends’. You see it on ads sometimes-working together in the kitchen. Having fun together. Fuck off. Two examples in real life-in McDonald’s once sharing the glass of Coke. Two straws. Literally sucking up to each other. And on a train-‘we like the sun’ ‘Craig likes the sun’. As if they owned the sun. ‘We like to go to a bistro’. Both together-in their tiny world- massaging each other’s ego. Oh Mrs Plastic’s calling-‘Listen to this am I being unreasonable if…’
4
Peace. They need two of them to make a single ego. But it certainly grates. And their delusion would be starkly visible if they stopped ritually asserting their oneness. Generally speaking, am I right in thinking that it’s usually the female who’s doing all the ‘we’ while the male is staring into space and thinking about undetectable poisons?
5
There’s a saying – ‘Children should be seen and not heard’. Well I’d prefer not to see them either. I hate children. I loathe them. I detest them. And I have nothing but contempt for parents who believe the whole world is fascinated by their offspring, with their stupid names and the nuisance they cause. The Church of Euthanasia advocates an end to breeding and I’m tempted to join them.
9
We are the same.
1
Unless people can afford to pay for their children without help from the taxpayer,they shouldn’t fucking have them. Why should I contribute to something of which I strongly disapprove? Children should also only be reared in families with a Father and Mother…no Gays should be allowed access to children. They should not be allowed to foster children and if they have one with a surrogate,it should be taken into care.
Fuck Off.
17
Excellent cunting, Lord Cuntony.
I have always considered parenthood to be the ultimate act of narcissism. I have no desire to inflict another version of myself on an already grossly over populated world – One is quite enough.
I have a neighbour who has procreated 4 versions of his useless self (2 with each of his wives, former and current), not one of which is hanging straight – every one of them wired up like an Austin Allegro. “Dad” gave up working in favour of benefits some 25 years ago and the kids are following suit….
10
Agree with that. It is narcissistic, or it’s stupid people with no interests, no hobbies, no individuality, no drive, etc, who believe that filling their meaningless lives with more bodies and noise is the answer.
0
Dear Lord Cuntony,
I have felt like a cunt all day.
A 3hr journey home which took 6hrs made me feel like a double-cunt.
A bottle of McEwan’s Champion Ale and a read of this nomination has cheered me up no end.
Thank you sir!
4
Or Lezzies Dick
No gay or lezzies tearing children
1
Oops REARING children
1
“One Born Every Minute”….that boring pile of shite, aired on Channel 4..most of the women on that series are total munters…land whales with medieval. piss pot hairstyles…how thefuck they got knocked up in first place is a total mystery…
I put a comment on YouTube. Fuckin hell I got some serious backlash from said. sexless munters. My theory. the blokes were under peer pressure to ‘ find a nice bland flabby lass’ or they are closet donut punchers….or permantly tripped on LSD…..
3