Just like the unflushable turds they are, the East London boy done bad, David Beckham, ex footballer, now media God and spunk donor for a family of publicity hungry scum, and his ugly scrawny wife, who looks as if she is Anal Ease Dodd’s body double, have crawled back into the limelight, sparking rumours that his long felt ambition to get knighted is paying off, here they are – gurning brainless Dave, accompanied by his “dress designer” wife, who looks like one of Henry Vlll’s doomed brides on her way to her beheading, attending the King’s banquet. Two little ignorant grifters, pretending they are somebodies, hoping that Star Fucker Starmer will reward them – you can’t polish a turd but he can try – and he probably will:
Nominated by W C Boggs.
If the brown inbred goblin of londonstan deserves a knighthood, for turning the capital into a vile, crime ridden, third world shit-hole, why not becks…
The only offensive thing about him is his shrivelled horrible wife, and if you squint really hard she disappears from view..
Plus dave is handy to have around when you are bored, he is a good read by all accounts..
14
He’s fairly harmless, if somewhat over-tattooed.
She looks like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle.
10
Looks like a nagging knut to me, really bad.
Whenever I see Beckham I just can’t get past that he’ll forever be Man U scum who got sent off against the Argies and wrecked the World Cup.
Plus he was mates with the ginger half-wit.
On a side note, Harry Hewitt should look on the bright side; baldness is a ginger’s second chance.
5
Bollocks.
Hoddle’s faith in spritualist crap and the failure to practice penalties cost England that 1998 World Cup quarter final. Reorganisation after the sending off would have worked. But Hoddle refused to deviate from his plan (whatever that was).
Paul Ince and David Batty missed their very badly taken penalties. When asked by the world’s press if England had practiced penalty shoot outs, Hoddle said thet hadn’t. West Ham wankers hanging effigies of Beckham frrom lamp posts and the tabloids witch hunt was deflecting the blame from Hoddle. Glenn came to a messy end. When he hired a spiritualist faith healer (Eileen Somebody) made remarks about disabled people paying for their ‘past crimes’.
With a manager like that, England didnt have a hope in Hell of winning the World Cup.
4
Slightly better than average, man u scum.
2
With some of the useless cunts who have been knighted I think Becks comes quite low down on the list, I must admit other than his appearances in adverts I have no idea what he or the skinny freak are doing.
At least is will annoy the Scousers
6
If they knight Suckdick in the unlikely event that I would be offered a knighthood I would hope I would turn it down,
4
As would I Wanksock. Arseholes accept gongs.
3
‘cor blimey guv,wot’s all this then me getting a gong’ …naah Ur avin’ a larf ain’t ya,more chance of swapping ‘toria for a 🐫 …’ere sheikhy u got a minute 👑
4
I remember when Beckham got turned down for appearing on The Simpsons because he “wasn’t famous enough”.
Being an average footballer and married to a scowling pipe cleaner obviously doesn’t do it for the Americans. To be honest though when I used to watch it I didn’t know half the so-called famous cunts featured either.
He and his cretinous family have since appeared in the show so either he has raised his celebrity profile in the US or they are fucking desperate.
8
She would be an interesting guest in my dungeon, LL.
It’d be quite the dichotomy to watch her bony frame 69ing with Dawn French’s blubbery grey lips in a shallow inflatable paddling pool of caramel.
9
Hey LL,
Believe it or not their collective profile has risen a bit here in the States because of their falling out with the Dick and Dickess of Suckit.
It’s like, we don’t know who these cunts are but if the Markles hate them they must be alright.
7
Cunt Engine, why not be greedy and have all the ex-Spice Girls in your dungeon?
To be honest I don’t mind him too much General, he’s thick but has monetized his minimal talents. He has come a long way from having an effigy of him hanging outside a pub wearing a sarong. But a knighthood? No.
4
David’s got a new book out.
He’s busy colouring it in.
13
Lammy?
Here’s a pic of that…somewhat predictably:
https://images.app.goo.gl/N4q7bVbG7jbwriom7
Safe pic.
8
😂😂😂
4
Hope the pictures are numbered to help him out.
0
Who remembers ” Driving Mr. David”?
3
Is that from Viz, JP?
2
Yes, Thomas. Absolutely hilarious.
2
Yes, it’s where he drives you up the wall.
0
He’ll be in fucking good company when they put that sword on his arse licking shoulders…💩
https://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/david-beckham-avoided-paying-tax-33029384
Awful cunts…💩
13
They are
5
It’s overcast here and drizzling. More interesting than the Beckhams at the palace.
7
Two tier is able to pick up a turd by the clean end.
8
No, sorry BB. I simply don’t believe that at all.
Two Tier can only pick up his own turds by the clean end.
What comes out first represents the lies he told to get elected, what comes out last is what represents what we now know.
I’ll let you decide which end is clean.
4
Embarrassing. There’s no other word for them.
7
Z Listers.Both a pair of gormless turds.Piss off to Outer Mongolia.
10
Outer Mongolia rejected their residency application on the grounds that they would bring no discernable skills, or enhancement to the country.
9
Rusty bollocks Harry Hitler & the black yank are worse.
6
She’s not even black.
3
She was doing a Heer Leikner, or did goal line hanger come out with it first ?
2
Same as Obama Sam, as much white as black (more than likely more white judging by their skin tone and features) due to parentage, but identifying as white negates the victim card.
1
Maybe I am being a bit controversial but I don’t mind them…… Much.
He was a good footballer for a while.
Unfortunately he used to lose his bottle and get himself substituted if he knew that a penalty shoot out was coming.
Overrated for his free kick abilities.
He doesn’t take himself too seriously.
He knows that he is thick.
She works, not hard and not too successfully.
But at least she tries to justify herself.
Their marriage has lasted for a very long time, unlike other celebrities.
A pair of cunts but not as bad as most.
11
What pissed me off with that pair was when the old whore got him to make an honest woman of her how they had “thrones” built for their wedding ceremony – a pair of real low-end pikies. I think Stacey Solomon uses them as a role model.
2
I suppose there are worse candidates for a gong, but the arse licking is a bit unseemly.
Anyone remember that cunt Gary Barlow trying to crawl up Charlie’s arse and then being rumbled for suspected tax dodging. That put paid to his ambitions, fortunately.
Anyway, apart from Beckhams impending knighthood possibly being devoid of real merit, we’ll have the unedifying spectacle of Skeletor basking in definitely undeserved limelight.
What a horrible thought.
7
Obviously he deserves a gong.
Possession of a knighthood is the sure-fire mark of an establishment arselicking Cunt.
6
Strange how the likes of Page,Plant,Gilmmour and waters aren’t considered for these enoblements given their immense contributions yet cretins like cliff et al are a shoe in?
I’d like to think they ‘did a Bowie’ and told the establishment to fuck off.
2
Musicians, politicians, actors, footballers, etc should not receive further aggrandisement through the honour system for merely, very often, being in the right place at the right time, and earns vast sums and living in luxury for doing so.
‘Services to acting’ is of no use to society whatsoever.
What about ‘services to plumbing”, or ‘working 12hr shifts in a factory for 40 years” services?
Again, George Carling – Symbols are for the symbol minded.
2
Contrary to popular opinion, there is nothing wrong with my syntax, spelling, comprehension or grammar.
It’s a combination of this shitty, slit-eyed phone, shitty eyesight and fat fingers 🙂
0
And another thing.
All this stuff with celebs effectively lobbying for a knighthood.
Time was when a celeb getting a gong was a surprise as well as an honour, but all that changed.
I blame Fat Reg.
All that candle in the wind bollocks. Being seen at the right funerals.
Grief jacking off the back of the demise of Freddie Mercury and Versace.
It worked wonders for him, so the Beckhams of this world were bound to follow suit.
Advertising Stella Artois is probably not the best way to go about things though, Dave.
Anyway, if it keeps his Skeletal missus happy, then fair enough.
3
Fuckin Stella😄
It’s for tramps.
7
Like I say Mis, not exactly a good look is it?
Might as well be advertising Tennants Super or White Lightning.
Money grabbing prick!
5
Your spot on Monty.👍
He may as well advertise treatment for scabies,
Or ointment for body lice.
Grabbing twat.
2
Miserable faced fucker his missus eh?
More meat on a Aldi chicken wing.
Couldn’t be doing with that me.
Not even a decent set of whammers to make up for the personality.
As for him he’s ruined tattoos.
Now every z- list, Love island, Ibiza dancing, turkey teethed, wannabe is inked up from arsehole to beak.
Tattoos were a right of passage growing up.
Nowadays, ” it says ” brotherly love”
In Sanskrit ‘…🙄
Get a fuckin big swastika!
Stand out from the herd.
Or a skull .
Can’t go wrong with skulls.
Classic
11
Had the misfortune to meet Skellington Spice once, Miserable.
In the Old Trafford players bar in 2000.
A revolting vile human being, Purposely ignored people and acted like they weren’t there. Needless to say, Fergie despised her. And he dreaded this rapacious stick insect getting her clutches on one of his best lads. But, it came to pass and – of course – she ruined him.
That said, he wasn’t as great as people say.
He did work his bollocks off. The end of the 1999 European Cup Final comes to mind, as he had a hand in both goals. And we all know about his crossing and free kick ability.
But, if I had an all time United XI, I would have a proper right winger. Either Stevie Coppell or Andrei Kanchelskis on the right wing, and Gordon Hill on the left. Based on players I actually saw in person, here is my all time Man United XI….
1. Peter Schmichel
2. John Gidman
3. Denis Irwin.
4. Arnold Muhren
5. Jaap Stam
6. Martin Buchan
7. Bryan Robson (Captain)
8. Andrei Kanchelskis
9. Eric Cantona
10. Jimmy Greenhoff
11. Gordon Hill
(Sub) 12. Norman Whiteside
2
Left the Holy Trinity out, as I barely remember seeing them actually play. Bestie played his last games as I started going to Old Trafford.
1
I’ve met Peter Shmeichel Norm.
Also Peter crouch, Phil Bardsey,
Shay Given,
And that awful cunt Andy cole.
That Phil Bardsey was a nice bloke.
Could have a laugh with him.
1
Can’t fault Schmichel as a goalie,
But a bellend off the pitch.
A mate of mine accidentally stood on his foot in a club.
Schmichel kicked off and refused to accept any apology.
Met Beckham a few times in his pre-Skelly days, a nice lad.
Bryan Robson was also a good bloke. Sound as a pound.
And Sammy McIlroy was a lovely fellah too. Ray Wilkins was also a gentleman,
Andy ‘Call me Andrew’ Cole is a miserable bastard.
1
The world needs more Norman Whitesides!
0
Cliffs done well, two cuntings in one day.
2
I don’t mind a decent tattoo, or two.
I’d never have one myself, being needle phobic, but fuck me, Beckham looks like Moses just carried him down from the mountain.
4
The Twilight Zone episode ‘The Howling Man’.
David Beckham as Brother Jerome.
And his wife Victoria as The Devil.
4
OT. Was at Tesco Prestwich with Mrs Norman today.
Busy, but everyone was in good spirits.
People being nice to each other, offering ladies or elderly a place to sit. People talking about Christmas and refusing to let the dreadful weather beat is. That sort of thing.
But, the only one who wasn’t interested was – wait for it – the young people (or Gen Z as they are known). This little cunt just plonked themself down on the car park bench and played some shitty game on her phone. The little bitch didn’t even offer her seat to her own mother, who was snowed under with Christmas shopping. I myself offered the lady my seat, even with my condition.
I wouldn’t mind, but it wasn’t a kid. This cunt was in her 20s. I wanted to put the little shit in a headlock and shove its head in one of the puddles made by the Mancunian squall. The Mrs could see me glaring at this ill mannered thoughtless turd. But – for the sake of the Mrs – I bit my tongue and left it. But it proves beyond doubt that young people are fucking cunts of the highest order.
10
While I agree Norman,
It’s not all of em.
Some young people are decent.
As JP will tell you in regards to his granddaughter.
But yes,
I’ve also been tempted to slap the snot out of some spoilt little shit.
7
Well, you are right pal.
We did encounter two younger girls in Home Bargains. Aged about 14/15. Very nice and thoughtful. One of them was riding a scooter inside the shop (not an electric one), but her manners were impeccable, as were the one of her mate. A far cry from the phone zombie at Tescos. Didn’t even help her mother get the shopping into the taxi.
8
@norm….mother should have got in the taxi and left it sat on the bench… hopefully they lived a few miles away and the cunt had no money 👍…simples
7
My Lass is a shining example of what a well brought-up child should be if the parents and carers engage with them.
I was the principle carer for the Lass for her first 11 years. She still spends her time with me during school breaks, even though she’s 15 now.
When her Mum and the Berserker go on holiday, the Lass lives with me.
I’m no Muppet, I’ve had a more than decent education, and I treat her like the adult she nearly is. She’s never heard baby talk, a cow is a cow, not a moo moo, and her points of view are as valid as mine.
We’re easy with each other.
I love her dearly.
10
Nice that JP.
I was a granny’s boy.
Always stayed there, loved her to bits.
Even when I was a wild teenager she always fought my corner.
Always believed in me.
You can’t buy that sort of loyalty.
6
‘Unflushable turds’.
The two words that sums this pair up completely.
Speaking of which, I’ll throw in a Harry and Meagain.
Evening all.
4
Mein Gott ! Meine winzigen Würstchen !!
They`re harmless. Good luck to them. We all need a kick-start in life.
Both David & Wictoria sport inter-related body decorations …
—⌊=_卐¯¯ᛋᛋ /̵͇̿̿/’̿’̿ ̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ⁍ ⁍ ⁍
(Although, I don`t think either of them know what they are supposed to represent).
Heil Xmas !!!
🎁
7
You are a silly sausage, Dolphy.
🌭
2
It’s Friday
It’s Christmas
It’s time for a tune
https://youtu.be/qysk6IgeFmQ?si=nf9bdEeaVdhul6lm
1
No reaction from the kids in the audience.
It must have been past their bed time.
2
Krauts for you.
Das gut ja?
The cunts don’t deserve Slade.
No rhythm see?
But put Wagner on they’re goose-stepping in tune.
2
Should that not be
Dawid unt Wictoria?
1
Here you go boys.
Check this out😂
https://pin.it/1zYP9PrBu
3
Halloween came round again really quickly.
I’m not sure which one scares me most, maybe a smiling Kim-Jong Un?
3
I’ve never understood the moniker “posh”. Pig nosed, inbred skinny council estate slapper spice seems more accurate.
5
She was never a council estate slapper her Dad had a very successful electrical wholesale business.
0
Tune time
https://youtu.be/bWLFj9JFBb8?si=x3wP283wl6rdh7ul
2
You pick some good stuff Sir Mali👍
1
Proper hip hop
https://youtu.be/TMZi25Pq3T8?si=5zd4IUJd6jM0z61P
2
Crazy ass motha fkr niggas, sums em up Mali
I imagine that a real day job is not what they really really want.
3
Dog Spice and her trained poodle are as much a couple of non entities as Harry the half blood Prince and his black queen.
In other news Some enrichment in a German Christmas Market this evening, a Saudi Doctor with bad driving techniques it appears.
8
O/T, re rent boy Moron.
I reckon he’s been given that job to fuck up relations with our uncle, so as to get us closer to our nearest neighbour..
Just a thought…!
Jesus H Christ, what a shitty corrupt shithole country GB has become….💀
9
at least they’re not in the news as much as they used to be.
ps if they gave that Nick Smeg a knighthood then anything goes and it is worthless anyway. should ask for it back.
4
Dave the Rug and Skeletor
Imagine waking up beside that bag of bones…..
‘Dave luv, my gash is all bloody, dry bugger me please, I need my morning rod’.
🤮🤮🤮
3