Spray Cheese

 

Many great things have come out of the US over the years. Rock & Roll music, the beer drinking hat and Donald Trump to name three but festering cat faeces Batman, what the fuckty fuck is spray cheese all about?

The cheese comes in a spray can but is not an aerosol. It squirts out like an oily greasy orange coloured dog turd, with a thick viscous quality sticking to everything like shit to a blanket as the brave or the foolish apply it to their food. It seems a very American thing too, instant readily available and convenient, like going to the fridge to slice some proper cheese is a chore as they squirt away with something cooked up from the devils anus.

Soldiers fighting foreign wars or students studying abroad often get sent food parcels from home with their favourite comfort food in them. Imagine getting sent this abomination? I’d be lobbing it back at the towelheads in Shitholistan along with the RPG’s.

I haven’t actually tried it myself so some input from the General or any other US based cunters would be handy to confirm or refute my slurs on an American food icon.

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Nominated by Liberal Liquidator.

67 thoughts on “Spray Cheese

  1. Breaking news off topic.

    Apparently the Two Tier Cunt of a PM is expected to announce Dame Peter ‘Mandy’ Mangledbum as the new British ambassador to the USA.

    Fucking hell.

    Is there no depths that cunt of a PM will sink?

  2. Two other interesting consumables from the U.S. are Heinz Green Tomato Sauce. Tastes exactly the same, but because of it’s colour it’s a tough call. & Tabasco Jelly Beans. Not met anyone that can eat a whole one.

  3. Dragons Den..

    I’ve invented squirty cheese

    Why?

    Keeps longer and you can squirt it on snacks

    What problem does this solve?

    Er, convenience.

    But cheese keeps for quite a while and tastes better au naturel. i’m out.

    • ps this a leftover from the 60s when convenience was all the rage. Don’t see the point of it. On par with horrors like Angel Delight or Smash – convenient but so is eating your own vomit.

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