Whiny Freedom Fighters of Hezbollah

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Let’s have a “pieces be blown off you” Cunting for the carpet kissing scum known as Hezbollah.

It is true that one man’s cowardly terrorist scum is another man’s target. So in order to keep from being targeted, the cowards of Hezbollah ditched their cellphones and started carrying old school, low tech pagers.

Makes sense right? If you need to coordinate the killing of innocent Jews with your comrades in Jihad and must also stay in touch with the Mullahs of Iran you need a way to communicate. However, if you don’t want a drone dropped on your cowardly ass you need to find a way to stay off the radar.

The solution was the old fashioned, low tech, ubiquitous pager used so effectively by the 1980s drug dealers here in the States.

Or at least they thought it was.

The counter-solution was kosher. Yes once again those pesky bagel snappers have outsmarted the followers of the Prophet and figured out a way to blow the balls off of the Faithful….literally…

Associated Press.

Across Lebanon thousands of peaceful terrorists were going about their degenerate business when…BAM!..their hands and pockets exploded and pieces of them flew off into the air.

A few have been killed but early news reports indicated most were just maimed.

Bummer.

And while these so-called freedom fighters whine about the “attack” I feel confident that thousands of goats across the Middle East are feeling quite relieved.

With regards to our big nosed friends. Well done! I’m glad you’re on our side. Although to be sure if Herr Starmer and Comrade Kammi have anything to do with it you won’t be for long.

As for the cowards in Hezbollah? It’s really quite simple. Quit murdering innocent Israelis and the Jews won’t have to blow your balls off. Then we won’t have to listen to you whine in soprano.

Nominated by : General Cuntster

118 thoughts on “Whiny Freedom Fighters of Hezbollah”

  2. I remember me and our kid on Starsky and Hutch walkie talkies when we were kids.

    Also had the Starsky and Hutch car, siren and the guns too. Loved all that, we did.

    Buy a kid guns for Christmas now, and it’s a nanny state toxic masculinity spaz out.
    A Nazi Stormtrooper Action Man would send the current woke cunts into a frenzy.

    • I had a pair of short range walkie-talkie’s when I was 7 or 8. My sister often had one of the two which we would use to talk after bedtime. One night, for whatever reason, we were told no walkie -talkie use that night.

      I remember clicking the transmit button 3 times that night, despite the ban, to see if sis was defying the ban too. No go, but the next day I heard the neighbour tell my mother their telly had been acting up recently … channel hopping by itself. Not so much the previous night, though, … just the three times !! Eureka!

      Oh the fun I had after that… these were 2 channel days after all. (And not remote-control t.v’s, either). Dallas end of episode cliffhanger? .. *click* .. Coronation St. episode-end minus 10 seconds? * click* … and so on. Never caught.

      Simpler days 🙂

    • I had a cap gun of a replica Nazi-issue Luger.

      Got in trouble for pretending to be “the SS” in the playground at school.

      I was 10.

  3. It’s certainly entertaining watching the BBC struggle to remain impartial on this one (or at least as impartial as a Jew hating Allah loving organisation can be).
    Inevitable reports of child casualties and ‘is this an own goal by Israel?’ among their ‘balanced’ reporting.
    Perhaps, if Hezbollah and Hamas ‘freedom fighters’ were to put on uniforms, organise themselves into a proper, recognised army and agreed to meet the Israeli army in battle, rather than hiding amongst civilians, there would be little or no child deaths.
    Not the sort of comment you’re likely to see or hear on the BBC though, unfortunately.

  4. I was chuckling loudly as I heard this story on the wireless earlier. Genius.

    Top Nom, General. Loving your work.

    The Walkie-Talkies also going bang is as good.

    The Hezzaballbags must be wondering what they can operate safely now. I suspect next we will hear about exploding camel dung or self ignited olive oil.

  5. Just a thought.
    I suppose it’s too much to hope that the Calif of Lonstabistan and the ex-Calif of Jockistan both have a pager or walkie-talkie.

    • I bet watching that uplifting…uh I mean disturbing video gives the surviving Faithful a serious case of the Heebie Jeebies.

      Never mind. I’ll leave without my coat

      • Hi GC.
        It was a challenging wank, to be sure.
        But only because it was just over a minute long.
        I had to watch it six times before I could get my musket to discharge.

    • Thanks for that Thomas. Much appreciated.

      I only had to watch it three times before reaching a heightened state of tumescence that exploded of its own accord.

      Makes you wonder what the Israelis will do tomorrow.

      It’s like Christmas. Can’t wait. 😁

      • To be clear:
        I couldn’t give a fuck:
        about the goat herders and wearers of table cloths…
        dead or maimed.

  8. Just seen the Lebanon Health Minister complaining that Israel isn’t following the normal rules of war. Like Hezbollah or any cunt in that hellscape are any authority on what’s right or wrong.

    • I heard this also Liberal,

      I truly don’t know how they can keep straight faces when uttering such pure and simple bollocks.

      It must be in their DNA or they are literally indoctrinated from birth, or both, or something.

  9. A genuinely inspired piece of spy craft from the masters .

    This is why the goat fuckers will never beat them

    1. They are the most vengeful people on the planet , fuck around and find out
    2. They are smart as fuck as well

    At least the Hezbollah men using she/her pronouns have had their gender reassignment surgery done by the Israelis for free

    Can’t say fairer than that

  10. Couldn’t help thinking of one of the cunts using the crapper at the time of detonation .
    Fucking brilliant the Israel’s took out some cunt with an exploding mobile a few years ago. Ring, ring hello bang. It’s never an accident with Mossad. Not sticking to the rules of war bollocks just ask what’s left of Hezbollah. Let’s hope the cunts don’t break out the flying carpets. Would be cruel but booby trapping goats arses would likely catch a few more

  11. Now solar panels and fingerprint scanners seem to be self detonating all over Hezbollah and Hamas country.

    Check mate tablecloth heads.

  12. Won’t these goat shagging Muslims ever learn, the Jews have been dealing with anti Semite fascists since 1946.

    You will never win.. Settle with what you have. Or be destroyed….🔥

      • I cannot tell a lie, General, .. I saw it in a comment section whilst looking for a bit of footage of the walkie-talkie shenanigans.

        I’m fully sure that the first one on YouTube to round-up a dozen or so pager/walkie-talkie’s blowing-up footage, and overlay the(earworm) intro-song to ‘Beadle’s About’ over a compilation of them … million+ views in no time, nae bother!

        That’s not a reference you could possibly get, though : Jeremy Beadle was a British television prankster last century.

        Incidentally I was totally chuffed to come up with ‘Koranderthal’ at work one day 9/11 – ish. Rushed home to the internet(!) later but too late! .. some other cunt had come up with it previously.

      • “…Heard about the USS Liberty?…”

        …but Jon, don’t you know the Liberty attack didn’t happen. it’s just another ‘hateful antisemeddick trope’. ..
        oy the agony,
        oy the shame
        you mock our suffering
        just for a game… etc etc et-fucking-cetera

      • I read the entire unfolded Wikipedia page about the USS Liberty several years ago.

        Pretty sure Jeremy Beadle was not involved.

  18. ‘But…. But Israel aren’t fighting fair…’

    Like the Hamas and Hezbollah human fillth are Marquess of Queensbury’

    Fuck off.

  19. This is a mint nomination, General.

    Some poor sod dies in Londonistan, and we’re ordered to accept as part and parcel of living in a modern city (fuck you, Suckdiq Khan).

    But, when some dirty Hamas greaseball gets their just desserts thousands of miles away, and it’s collective grief, endless whining and – I dare say – a minute’s silence from the England team.

    Simple lesson for the Hamas excrement. Don’t kill Israeli women and kids.
    It’s your own fault. You dirty toothless camellbuggering greasy bastards.

  20. The pager and mobile bombs have killed at least twelve, including two children, and injured thousands others in Lebanon. Many of those injured are women and children. So much for the ”targeted, precise attacks on terrorists only!” I keep hearing about.

    They (Israel) also use ”Palestinian,” ”Hezbollah,” and ”Hamas” interchangeably. Anyone they deem ”terrorists,” any crimes against the population suddenly become legitimate.

  22. Isn’t it strange. The type of westerner who champions these barbarian groups are the very ones these savages would end first.

    By the way, imagine the howls of l”ali acknar “ a few moments after those pagers go pop. The scene must be hilarious 😂

  23. Fairly predictable shit from the people who confuse Israel with anything other than a terrorist state. Or who have some romantic idea that Israel is the goodie in a global Western. Or that escalating the horror will solve anything for, er, poor little Israel:
    https://www.nytimes.com/2024/09/19/world/middleeast/saudi-israel-relations.html

    Trump won’t like that…

    This was an indiscriminate terrorist attack by Israel, and its only effect will be to make the Middle East more dangerous.

    No further comment, except to suggest that the MAGA crowd who appear to enjoy the taste of Bibi’s shit WILL come to regret their allegiance to Israel. America doesn’t have allies, only interests (General de Gaulle), and even with half the world’s Jews living in America its interests do not include the preservation of that terrorist state.

  24. But why has it become popular with main stream media cunts to start being sympathetic towards terrorist factions?

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