The Oasis (3) Reunion

Posted on by

 

Guardian

Given that the Gallagher brothers can’t stand the sight of each other, one is forced to ask the question why the talentless twosome have reformed the band to do a 14 date UK stadium tour. Surely it can’t just for the money can it?

Well, perhaps Noel’s attitude to reforming softened in the wake of a divorce that allegedly cost him £20m? Or maybe the High Flying Birds aren’t quite flying so high these days?

Whatever the reason the back catalog of rehashed Beatles’ songs will make them a few quid. After all, why bother to go into the studio and release any new material when you can just roll out the same old dross. It’s been so long that the kids will probably think it’s something new anyway.

A beg Admin’s indulgence for the following link to a song I released in 2020. The lyrics are so spot on that it might have just been written today just to mark this momentous occasion. I give you “We’re In It For The Money” which I humbly offer to the Gallaghers if they would like to include it in their set…

youtube

Nominated by ChasC.

A second helping of not looking back in anger from Norman below.

The Oasis comeback….

Already I have had enough of it. The fuss and coverage of this has been ridiculous. First of all, is it the proper debut album era band, or just the Gallaghers with sidemen?

After all, they have had four drummers. So it’s anyone’s guess what sort of ‘band’ it’ll be. A band is a group of musicians who have a magic chemistry and work well together. It isn’t two bickering brothers and load of musos cashing in.

And the amount of morons it has attracted. One knobhead was gsushing about how the reunion is a great day for Manchester. Since when did the Gallaghers represent Manchester? As I recall, the brothers pissed off to London the minute they could, and they haven’t been back since. They are as bad as the Beatles and Cilla Black for shite off a shovel scarpering to the smoke.

And the other pricks who were talking shit today. One silly bitch on BBC Radio Manchester went on about how she saw Oasis in 1989. What? the 1989 when Oasis didn’t even exist? They formed in 1991. And this daft cow was actually presenting the radio show. And, on the same show, another mong yapped on about all the times he saw Oasis in the ‘Eighties’. I knew most of their fans were stupid, but come on…

Oh, and the predictable and nauseating bulllshit from Andy Burnham was present and correct. He can fuck off and all.

As you can probably tell, I am sick of this reuniion before it has even started.
What’s the story? Load of bollocks.

And a third chorus of Wonderwall from W C Boggs.

Every front page today – be they “serious” or cheap or free tabloids carries large photographs of two aging songsters, brothers, it seems, who cordially dislike each other, but, because they need advanced dental work, new trusses and Zimmer frames are reuniting after 15 years to purvey their brand of Britpop with their beat combo.

The Gallagher Brothers are back, and they are treated with all the reverence there would be if Sir Adrian Boult or Dame Myra Hess had risen from the dead.

No doubt many aging Radio 1/2 listeners are creaming their undercrackers at the thought of reliving their youths, but they – and these pop brothers – are now wobbling into middle age, and they will find they are not the fanny magnets they were back then. The battling brothers will probably have brewers droop which will disappoint the now advanced in years groupies, the trendies of 15 years ago are now balding or their tits are resting on their kneecaps. Change and decay in all around I see.

Provided they don’t kill each other on the road, or have another 15 year hissy fit, they might well soldier on like the Rolling Stones or geriatric McCartney, but the ridiculous spin on this non-event eagerly taken up by the press (perhaps to deflect attention from Starmer’s speil yesterday) reeks of undeserved hero worship and free advertising for two worn out old has-beens. The BBC’s news programmes were orgasmic in their love. Far better they and their fans just kept their memories of younger and happier days while sucking a Wurthers Original.

A pair of Mancurian arseholes are going to relieve their old tat at 2025 prices. Why bother?.

I give you a link from the cheapest (in every sense of the word) “newspaper”, though you will even find them in the Telegraph:

Addendum by Sam Beau.

The 2025 `DW Pension Tour`

Yes, I know they`ve been cunted twice before, but why not cunt them again – this time for being the greedy cunts that they are and cashing in on their back catalogue. Before one of them dies.

Not so fucking thick now, are they?

Fortunately, I`ve spent absolutely no time whatsoever trying to obtain a ticket for the upcoming tour whilst simultaneously laughing my face off at the pathetic cunts wasting hours of their lives trying to buy one – for a ridiculous price.

Might I suggest to the brothers it would be easier setting up a `Go Fund Me` page rather than having to actually get out of bed and tour globally the length and breadth of the UK?

But still, after having said all that, I do hope they further deprive millions more fuckwits of their hard-thieved cash with future jigs.

No doubt looking back in anger, it`ll certainly be a champagne supernova for them.

♪🍸♫

94 thoughts on “The Oasis (3) Reunion”

  1. Yawn.
    They always sounded like sub Lennon droners to me. Yoke is probably proud of them.

  2. Cant stand this pair of absolute cunts of the highest order,they do make a sort of Beatles tribute band with a heaped spoonfull of complete cuntery at every given opportunity.
    They were cunts then, they are cunts now and will always be gobshite mank cunts, IM am truly amazed that their carreers when past the first attention seeking public argument, this is what happens when your mum fucks close relatives….

  3. Look at the silly cunt’s haircut.

    One of my happiest days was the time I read in the news the smack head/ house burglar looking bell end had a tooth smacked out in Germany .

  5. Oasis

    Peak popularity 1996 just before the last Labour government got elected.

    Broke up in 2009 just before the previous Labour government lost power.

    Reform 2024 the year the new Labour government was elected……..

    Hopefully they will break up again very soon and the people will bring down the Government.

    Election now as the red scum were saying for so long.

  6. The Charlatans are a far superior band in my opinion. Great songwriting, great live band and lead man with Tim Burgess. Also had to deal with great tragedy losing band members at no age to illness and accident. By the way I am an Oasis fan but through the years the Charlatans are way ahead of them.

  8. I like the timing of this.

    Yes I know they’re money grabbing cynical cunts and I know they’re nothing more than a shit Beatles tribute act but Oasis going on tour in the UK will be enough to rattle the cages of the usual suspects.

    2 white northern blokes selling out arena’s full of white British folk who are there possibly reminiscing about a better time in their country’s history.

    The establishment won’t like it and will probably insinuate that it’s all a bit far right.

    So it’s not all bad.

    • Will be interesting to see if fake northern working class heroes like gobshite Rayner, Litha Nandoes and Rebecca Wrong-Daily have managed to get tickets.

    • LOL!
      The Establishment love these phoney so called “working class” multimillionaire celebricunt scammers.
      Blair was the Gallaghers number one fan first time round.
      William & Kate and the rest will be there with their complimentary tickets and backstage passes.
      Taking selfies with the old has-beens.
      Fuck them.

      • Evening Ruff.

        You’re quite right.

        My point remains however that the music and the band’s from that era, is still a celebration of white working class British culture. Whether you like the cunts or the music of the time, or you don’t.

        The 90s was probably the last time that producing or promoting anything culturally authentically British, was actually celebrated.

        Compare that to now and the levels of self loathing which is continually belt fed to the British population.

      • Evening HJ
        This is the second time you appear to have inferred that I am Ruff.
        Much as I am flattered, I am also mystified as to why you should hold this erroneous conviction.
        Perhaps you would care to elaborate?

      • Hehehe 😂
        Bet Hermans rubbish at cluedo?!

        Although he’s right that Ruff still posts on here.
        As does Vernon Fox.

  12. Take a couple of London to Brighton’s, take another swig and crank up Morning Glory, it is a good wall of excess.
    Apart from that, they’re a couple of one-dimensional, monobrow one trick pony’s.

  13. Any person paying good hard earned money to watch this dog shit needs to have their head fully tested and replaced if need be.

    The music is shit, the people are shits and the whole thing should be dunked in a tank of strong piss.

    I will not be attending. That is all.

    Spanky

  14. Even in their 90s heyday, there was a smell of the Second Division about these two.

    In the 70s, Rod Stewart bagged Britt Ekland, and Mick Jagger married Bianca Perez and Jerry Hall. And while Duran Duran had top models like Yasmin Le Bon and Renee Simonsen, the Gallaghers ended up with Patsy Kensit and Meg Matthews. Say no more. As I said, hardly big league. Must have been a disappointment to Liam, when he found out every rock star and footballer from that time had (allegedly) the pleasure of Kensit’s company. And Noel loves his ‘forceful’ control freak women. As, he is now smarting from his recent divorce from his latest Fräulein Rottenmeier.

  15. Why anyone would want to waste a day of their life trying to get tickets to see these two over-the-hill twats and their hangers on is beyond me.

    Even more bizarre are the idiots that are happy to indulge in ‘extreme supply and demand economics’ by handing over the price of a decent used car to entrepreneurial scalpers before running crying to kiercunt…

    I was stupid enough to waste my hard earned to see them in Hong Kong back in 1998 when I working construction there and wanted to something to do one evening, but I instantly regretted it so I guess that makes me a cunt.

    Anyway an instantly forgettable lackluster evening remembered only for the stadium being less than 1/2 full and the pretentious shade wearing pricks threatening to walk off stage because the locals were shinning laser pointers at them. Perhaps they thought they could make them dance like a cat…

    Fuck ‘em all. Cunts.

    • Richard Ashcroft was a much wiser spend of my £.

      I did see Oasis back at the (once) Apollo in Manchester, and Noel refused to sing. His complete disregard and lack of respect for people who paid to see him was abhorrent.

      Glad it was only 25.

      Nothing like seeing God Forbid. They were all real gentlemen. Signed my CD and spoke to us after the gig. Was an ace night alongside Killswitch Engage and shadows fall.

    • I remember 1997. And the almost universal and unanimous wanking about their third album. And that was before a note of it was even heard. ‘Be Here Now’ I think it was called.

      But, then the dust and hype settled, And people actually realised that it wasn’t very good at all. And it wasn’t.

      The B-Sides album ‘The Masterplan’ is better than their third album.

  18. Over £300 to see a pair of daft cunts attempt to sing. They can’t even talk properly.

    Just listen to that shite song; shakermaker.

    Still though. The UK has no shortage of fucking idiots with no money who would be more than obliged to pay for 3 tickets on the Barclaycard to see ‘ r kids’ in London mk. II.

    I would tell anyone travelling into Manchester to be careful for getting robber or raped, but if they have already got bent over for a ticket they can tick that box off already.

Comments are closed.