Betting Shops

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Walk down just about any high street and you’ll be met with the same depressing sight; the shabby frontages of the likes of B and M, Poundstretcher, and American ‘Candy’ stores. If you’re looking for cheerful individuality just forget it.

But to my mind when it comes to lowering the tone of an area, you can’t beat that establishment whose sole aim is to part the naïve or the addicted from his hard-earned benefit money, as quickly as is humanly possible. I refer of course to the betting shop, or the bookies; Coral, Paddy Power, Ladbrokes, Betfred and others.

You’ll see them strung out about the place, their frontages at once gaudy and seedy in their corporate colours. Absolutely classy. Not. They’ll likely be very near to a pub, to facilitate easy passage between one and the other.

I’ve no idea what these places are like on the inside, never having been in one. But I visualise counters surrounded by banks of screens with pasty-faced losers staring glassy-eyed at the parade of runners and riders, disgarded betting slips strewn around their feet.

I’d love all these cynical, money-grubbing cunts to crash and burn, but as long as there’s a punter with a pound in his pocket and a burning belief that he knows the winner of the 3.30 at Kempton, it just ain’t gonna happen.

Exploitative bastards, and classless with it.

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Nominated by Ron Knee.

70 thoughts on “Betting Shops”

  2. My town’s commercial side is looking a tad gruesome. There are empty shops courtesy of the Amazon effect: there are copious barber shops “staffed” by Kurds, Turks, Afghans which always have more of the workers’ BMWs outside than punters inside; there are the ghastly Yank fast food chains peppered with putrid-looking teens and tattooed hippos chomping on plastic patties; the few places that sell actual groceries. aside from the “metro” supermarkets who employ a short Nigerian security guard to scroll on his phone whilst the Romanians redeem their five-knuckle discount, are Chînkzilla shops and their shitty Korean noodles or Dooshka shit-holes flogging illegal fags. Charity shops provide decent clothes for Slovaks to purchase and sell to stupid people online.

    At least the Wetherspoon’s is still open.

  3. When the fun stops, stop! … the hypocrisy in the cunts. Bit o’poker in Vegas all I’ve ever done .. one 12-hour through-the-night session per week spent there. Am about evens with them, overall. Probably a tad ahead if you were to count in the free booze you’re plied with.

    But back to the insincere warnings on ads, by bastards. If you’ve never seen it, .. I recommend South Parks “Drink Responsibly” take on it.

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=EJT0NMYHeGw&pp=ygUcc291dGggcGFyayBkcmluayByZXNwb25zaWJseQ%3D%3D

  5. On the gambling industry in general ;

    Zero(green) on the roulette wheel was always the house advantage … the thing that took away 50/50 evens on the thing. Multiply that by the thousands of times a wheel is spun, and the house – statistically- cannot lose.

    15 years ago, I spotted a second green (‘double zero’) spreading across the various Roulette wheels in different casinos(Vegas trip, again). Some were still using one, others with the two.

    I remember thinking ‘why would any cunt indulge a place taking more advantage for themselves, and not go to one with the single green?’

    Couple of weeks back I spotted a Roulette wheel in the background on a thing on TV.

    THREE greens!

  6. I’m one of many thousands that have actually made a profit from “bookies”
    We are known as matched bettors.
    Over a period of about 5 years I made over £50,000 from those cunts.
    I’m now “gubbed”from every major online book maker. They simply won’t let me bet with them.
    The secret. What they call bonus abuse.
    All bookies want your business so they offer free bets etc to pull you in.
    Laying your initial bet via an exchange for a few pennies loss, then using the free bet to harvest about 70-80% of the free bets value.
    Lots and lots of small gains here and there adds up to a tidy lump of wedge.

  7. I don’t see the point of a betting shop; you can do it all online. I have an occasional flutter; haven’t bothered in years.

    I looked into counting cards; seemed like too much work. Once you’d practiced for months on end, you then had to learn all the strategies to place bets and use your knowledge. Sounded like it was going to be a year or two’s worth of hard work and then you still risk losing your money. Hats off to anyone who has gotten one over on the casinos.

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