Amanda Holden [5]

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I think that we all get a bit tired of seeing that skank Katie Price flashing her tits for the tabloids and making a proper bore of herself.

It’s so refreshing therefore to see a bit more class and style being shown by Britain’s Got Talent ‘star’ Amanda Holden (53).

None of that endless postering for the tabloids and soshull media. No being constantly photographed in a skimpy bikini or in a skirt with a slit up to her navel, flashing her knickers. No being seen braless in a tight top, nipples looking as though they’ve been iced down. No, she’s very reserved is our Mandy, as befits a mature 53-year-old woman.

It makes a refreshing change, I think you’ll all agree.

Amanda Holden is 53, and famous for being famous.

Daily Fail.

Nominated by : Ron Knee

64 thoughts on “Amanda Holden [5]”

  1. Despite being a vacuous ninny, she ought to be given some leeway for having such a nice figure at 53 and further leeway for not being Katie Price or Kate Garraway.
    That said, she’d be quite a feather in the cap for my romance dungeon roster.
    Good morning one and all in the two-tier gulag of England.

    • You not been swept up in kiers war on the Far Right yet Thomas?

      Only a matter of time.

      Remember to take a poster of Rita Hayworth!👍

      • I’ll see you in 20 years or so, MNC.
        Or you could send me a cake with some C4 or Semtex and a detonator inside?

  2. Clever with her make up and looking good for the cameras, but I wouldn’t want to wake up next to it after a month or two of her missing her intensive botox therapies.

    Besides that, she is blonde and blondes just don’t do it for me.

    Sorry Amanda, no Artful Todger for you.

    • Not a natural blonde though AC. Can guarantee her carpet won’t match her curtains😂😂😂

      • I bet they do, she would use John Freida’s Only For Blondes down below. Plenty of work done but by the plastic surgeons I suspect, she can afford better ones than Katie Price. Also she must be on HRT otherwise she would be much more menopausal. Nowt wrong with that, Mrs. W was forever cleaning the house when she was going through it,

        Good Morning.

  3. Some women are addicted to the flash of a camera and a bit of attention.

    Amanda is one of these.
    Obsessed with her own appearance.

    To be fair she looks better than surgery freakshow Katie Price and over exposed calculator Carol Voldemort.

    Les Dennis used to chuck his batter up her.
    Till she climbed up the celebrity ladder by shagging A lister Neil Morrissey.

    • And when Neil Morrissey was shagging her, he was pretending she was Caroline Quentin.
      Neil’s got a thing for giant, meaty cloppers with colossal bushes where the matted, tangled hair rises almost to the overhanging belly button.

      • Neil Morrissey, wonder where he went?

        At one point the gormless fuck was always on telly.

        He must of committed some sort of career blunder that’s seen him blacklisted?

        Casual racism
        Eating meat
        Misgendered someone

        I’ll miss his slack good natured face and idiotic stoke accent ,
        With time I’m sure.

  4. Now Doc Martin’s wife……..

    I would crawl naked through broken glass just to poke matchsticks in her shit.

  5. I’d shag the arse off her.

    I bet she howls like a junkyard dog.

    Utterly filthy.

    Good morning 🌄👍

  6. Me too,
    But I’d immediately lose interest once id drained my spuds.

    I’d wipe my helmet clean in her hair and say

    ” Holden, don’t just laze around get off your plastic arse and get the chip pan on,
    Or you’ll get what Les should of given you.”

    • After mating💪, me and Mandy would have a lovely afternoon tea.

      Then fool around sexually with squirty cream and strawberries 🍓🍓.

      Started the shed yet ?

      • Sorry Jack, went out on a job in Northwich.

        No still clearing it putting membrane and wood chippings down.

        Then I’ve got to demolish two big chicken sheds and clear it before I start on the shed.

        I’ll be lucky to get it started this year.

      • If there’s shit in them thar chicken sheds, save it for your brassicas, peas and beans and rhubarb.
        💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩

        They love it 👍

        Tax free Saturday eh ?

        Capital 👍

      • LL@. Nowt wrong with a bit of pallet theft.

        Especially off those woke cunts at the Co Op 😁

  7. Never been to a cattle market, is what it appears to be, modern day slavery. I’ll play along with it, seeing that I know nothing whatsoever about this person, having just clapped eyes on her and appearing fuckable, but she could be a complete bore conversation wise with an inflection in her voice, which would turn me off her completely.

  8. My list of what some might judge to be filthy perversions i’d like to inflict on Amanda and Doc Martins wife for that matter are too many to list here.
    But at least i’ve developed a pleasant semi thinking about it so many thanks for this nom.

  9. I’ve concluded the only way to keep this naughty lady off her phone is to bum her dry repeatedly.

    Oh and can it do a fry up?

    We need to know.

    Good morning.

  10. Everyday it seems Amanda is wowing in some age inappropriate outfit. You’re 53 Amanda, show a bit of class.

    You’re not the first woman in decent shape for her age to need her ego massaged by ooos and ahs and you won’t be the last. Men still find you attractive at 53? Most men will tell a hole in the ground it’s hot if they believe they can stick their dick in it, it’s how we’re made.

    Amanda is in danger of joining the Katie Price and Madonna in forming an unholy trinity of older women who are ever more desperate to be told they are still hot despite being older.

    Menopause will have turned what’s between your legs into kebab meat by now. Go have a hot flush and try and find some dignity ffs.

    • Cher is doing some advert on the telly at the moment, at first I thought it was one of the Olympic boxers. I guess she must be nearer 80 than 70.

      • She’s the queen of antiquities, probably dates back to the construction of the pyramids.

        Men love a bit of 80 year old snatch after all.

      • Blow the cobwebs off and get stuck it.

        Careful not to break anything the archeological team might be interested in

      • She must have spent at least $10 mill on ‘procedures’.

        Impossible to tell where she ends and the silicon begins.

  11. well, shes got a filthy laugh and i would willingly fuck her in the shitter then get her to piss on me afterwards.

  13. Fucking awful attention seeking cunt who got lucky after whoring herself on blind date, it even does the voice over now for the post code lottery. Why do women with very little in the breasticle region go braless or not at all.

    • She sucked her way to the top. She’s spent more time on her back than Kamala Harris.

    • If she’s going to keep getting herself in front of the camera, she could at least get her kit off properly instead of just trying to titillate us all.
      Something a bit more artistic,if you get my drift.

      I’d be prepared to give that a look.

      Morning all.

  16. Never heard of her. Tried to find a video interview in which she showed some brainstem activity. Failed. Luvvie with expensive agent.

  17. These kinds of brainless women bring down the female image from the above intelligence they have and forever having to start from scratch to prove to the average male they are more than that.

  18. No just another attention seeking cunt with absolutely zero morals, another fuck knuckle who probably phones her local paper to let them know where and when she will be posing with a tit hanging out (step forward Katie Price).
    Yes she looks good for her age, but in all fairness when most of your body has been surgically redone it should,not to mention her surgeon is copying the daughters body (lucky him) until she just looks like a fucking alien or a badly filled bag of oranges ( step forward Cher).
    The of course you have the endless comments about her sex life to try and keep the interest alive, to go with the surgically replaced body and the desperate attempt to give a last gasp to a career where you used to have respect but now you have to pump your tits and arse up and wear skin tight dresses to stay relevant (step forward Carol Vauderman).
    The eventually after they have sold their souls to the devil, the marriage has gone down the shitter and no fucker is prepared to put up with their unrealistic demanding ways, everyone has realised that your just a cunt, then people realise some of the other depraved shit you’ve done for money( step forward Markle and the Kardashies)
    Then when all the filler in your face, tits, arse starts to harden and your skin looks like a lizards ball sack, it’s a career in soft porn,so called comedy, plastic surgery gone wrong or Dr Zoggs freak show, so Amanda Holden, the other above sluts and lots who’s names I can’t remember, fucking step forward…… Quite sadcunts I think…

  19. Having the misfortune to listen to this skank with that cunt Jamie Theakston on the Heart breakfast show is a stomach turning and ear splitting experience.

    Theakston is a knob. But Holden is sickeningly syrup drenched. She is so over-nice and she ‘loves’ every cunt who calls in. She goes so over the top about any load of bollocks or idiot who phones in. And you can tell it’s an act. Not unlike that other utter cunt, Cilla Black, Nobody is that full of sunshine and agreeable. Holden is as fake as Bruce Jenner’s minge.

  20. You want ‘celebrity’ cunts? I’ve got ’em….

    The array of G-Listers on this year’s Strictly Cunt Dancing is a masrerclass in nonentities. The most’famous’ one is Toyah Wilcox. Say no more.

    And,, as for the one who can’t see? That’s just typical BBC woke shite.
    He’s probably already nailed on to win it before it”s even started, knowing them.

    Mind you, anything is better than that horrendous Abbington whore.

    https://www.bbc.co.uk/mediacentre/articles/2024/strictly-come-dancing-celebrity-contestants-confirmed

  23. OT. Can’t that cunt Pep grasp English football yet?

    After the Community Shield penalty borefest., the City manager said ‘It’s always good to strart the season with a title’.

    For a start, the Shield is not a ‘title’. It’s a traditional season openere that really means fuck all nowadays.

    Mind you, this is the bellend that refers to the FA Cup as an ‘FA Cup Title’.
    The title is the league championship, you thick scorchio cunt.

    And we still haven’t got shut of Rashford yet? I wish the cunt would fuck off.

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