I know it`s been cunted before, dear cunters, but it`s a cunt that just keeps on giving.
Apparently this week (13-19th May) was Mental Health Awareness Week.
Well I never? I thought that was last week. Or the week before that. Or any other random week, for that matter.
It seems like every fucking minute of every fucking day you hear someone, somewhere banging on and on (usually the MSM) about mental health (issues).
Can any of you cunters remember when `mental health issues` weren’t actually `issues`? Me neither. It used to be that someone may have a been a bit `off` or occasionally, someone had a `nervous breakdown`. Or more rarely, some nutjob somewhere (usually the US) had a brain-gasm and indiscriminately shot multiple people with a semi-automatic then finally himself. In all cases, with the right drug treatments & ECT for the mentals or in the latter case, self-treatment, all was once again hunky dory.
They were all just a bit `mad`. Yes, we`ve always been mental. Hitler, for instance – he was a bit mental wasn`t he? And that Putin, he`s a bit mad isn`t he? And one day I`m sure he`ll get it out of his system.
Rather nostalgically, It used to go something like this (lines from Nöel Coward`s Brief Encounter) …
Fred Jesson: “You’ve been a long way away.”
Laura Jesson: “Yes.”
Fred Jesson: “Thank you for coming back to me.” *
But for now we can all blame it on `mental health (issues)`.
If you want to read the fucking obvious drivel about this, here’s a link (but I wouldn’t bother if I were you – I didn’t – plus you`ll never get the time back.) …
https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/mental-disorders
* Optional follow-up line line: “Now get me fucking tea on, woman – I`m fucking famished Bitch.”
Nominated by : Sam Beau
I love a nutter me.
Nowadays you’re meant to be all sympathetic and understanding.
But when I was a kid you could enjoy the entertainment of mental people.
Whether it be throwing bangers at them or squirting them with water pistols.
Both sides enjoyed the banter.
The humour has gone,
The average headtheball doesn’t want you patronising them with your faux sympathy.
No.
He wants to free to express his nutty side and be pelted with pebbles off small children.
Think on.
13
It used to be that if you had someone who was a bit of a fruit bar in the family you would shut the fuck up about it.
I actually feel sorry for people with real mental health issues.
A few years ago I got hit on the temple by a golf ball.
The blood clot made me even weirder than usual.
I couldn’t think straight, I would wander off and sometimes get picked up by the police and taken home.
I often forgot where I put my car or if I actually arrived wherever it was by car.
Couldn’t remember people’s names.
It could have been worse I suppose.
If I hadn’t have been wearing a visor which took some of the impact I would have been dead.
I have no sympathy with the soft as shite cunts who think that every emotion other than happiness is a mental health problem.
Perhaps they should be used as targets at golf driving ranges to know what real mental issues are all about.
14
Be that Seve Ballesteros that tried to kill you Artie.
He’s a hitman for the Spanish mafia.
Golfers are murderous fuckers and I’ve been at war with them for nigh on 50years.
You weren’t wearing Speedo on the green were you?
9
I was wearing my finest plus-fours.
I was only about 30 meters from the tee.
I have no idea who the fuck hit a ball with me so close or why they did it.
I hit the deck like a sack of spuds.
My friend ran over and told me later that the cunts who were playing behind had legged it.
Earlier that week a guy was hit on the head by a ball.
He was over 100 meters of the tee.
He was dead on the spot.
Seve Ballesteros wouldn’t have abandoned his ball and ran off.
He was a tight cunt, notorious for travelling first class on planes and putting his family in economy.
8
You wouldn’t think that a few yards of elastic could do so much damage. Its only when they’re rolled up into a flog ball, the bastard can be lethal. The game should be banned, because I say so. But I’m not going to be like those stupid people shouting from the rooftops wanting something banned on a whim. I just simply ignore it.
8
That explain the counter walking around palma in his green speedos.
Turns out it was ISAC regular, artful who got mixed up with the high street and the gold course. 🤭
0
For fuck sake, fuck these fucking smartphones and their predictive text.
0
Bollocks. Nowadays mental health problems, particularly in the young, can be caused by the WiFi going down for 30 seconds, or getting a negative response to a tweet, never mind anything actually problematic. National Service? Fuck me, can you imagine the mental health problems if that ever happened?
15
The rate we are going at, there won’t be a national service. There will be compulsory conscription. We have no armed forces, who do they think will fight the Ivan’s? Not rishi rich and his gang. I’d say his fucking off may be deliberate; I wouldn’t want to given this country when the shit hits the fan. Chin up though, it will curtail the boat invaders. I can’t see them volunteering to defend our country.
7
Most of my staff start pleading “mental health problems” whenever they get hauled up on shit work or absenteeism.
I find this excuse rather difficult to accept, given mental health relates to issues with the brain, which is an organ that none of my staff have.
16
In fact they should rename it from “Mental Health Awareness” week to “Making Excuses For Being A Cunt” week.
(And before I get leapt upon, I’ve had plenty of struggles with depression in my life, just never used it as an excuse for doing a shit job)
18
Mental Health Week? Someone better ask that fucking 43% Nigerian yacht slag if she’s ok! Wouldn’t want the wigger to be feeling suicidal again, would we! The fucking pretend n*gnog cunt of all cunts!
7
I remember as after leaving school I was on a building skills course.
Load of council estate kids .
We were putting in new pathways around a bowling green in Poynton a posh part of Stockport.
We had this kid who was a bit puddled.
He was also deaf and dumb.
He couldn’t speak
He just made a honking noise like a goose.
Anyway, he had a right temper.
He was pushing a wheel barrow full of gravel.
This other lad was weeding.
As he came past the lad whipped his hands with some nettles he’d uprooted.
HONK!! HONK!!
He dropped the barrow full of gravel all over the manicured green and punched this lad in the mush.
They went into a full on brawl on the green.😁
A posh lady was screaming for them to stop.
It’s still one of the best days at work I can remember.
Honk honk
22
That’s literally the funniest thing i’ve heard this year
5
Wish I had a piss before I read this Mis.
Ah well best have a shower and get changed.
2
Wait!
There’s a posh area of Stockport?
1
Mental elf encompasses almost anything nowadays, particularly with the young.
Can’t face further education: Mental elf
Girlfriend shagging another bloke: Mental elf
Can’t get up for work: Mental elf
Don’t shower: Mental elf
Smoke too much weed: Mental elf
Nicked by plod for some gormless misdemeanour: Mental elf
And if your a celeb trying to further your career or dig yourself out of the shit: Mental elf
It’s become the equivalent of ringing in sick with the runs.
All aided and abetted by the media, social workers and other apologist cunts.
16
Smoking too much weed will affect mental elf. Ive seen the effects first hand and on numerous occassions.. Cunts can barely string two words together and can’t count. Too much, too young.
Still preferrable company to cokeheads, though. Awful cunts.
0
18 to 24 year olds have mental issues if they are parted from their phones for more than 60 seconds.
It’s like the old days of the bad back but now it’s a complete range of elf issues provide by the internet 😂
The youth of today don’t need to work, sit at home playing video games, keeps them out of trouble.
10
Employers don’t want them. They cost too much to train to be competent at anything. Many have lower literacy and numeracy skills than their grandparents, who left school at 14. Many have no social skills – cannot hold conversations or maintain eye contact. Their IT skills are lower than millennial counterparts as well, with little knowledge of installing software and physical components – printers, scanners etc.
A generation of fucktards.
1
In olden times mentals were heaved off to the loony bin. Cold baths, electric shocks and, if all else failed a lobotomy soon put them straight. Local gentry could bring their floozies in for bit of fun with the dribblers.Who is to say whether that was better or worse for society than the present deification of the nutters? It would certainly get the skivers and chancers back to work double quick if admitting to mental health issues meant a one way trip to the funny farm.
12
That’s what “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” was all about.
8
Sammy@
There used to be a big mental hospital in Macclesfield.
Anyone a bit peculiar or eccentric my gran would suspiciously say
” He’s from Macc him”.
Don’t hear it nowadays, nobody would get the reference anyway.
But my best mate lives in Macclesfield and I take childish delight in telling everyone
” He’s from Macc him”😁
8
Was the nut-house in Macc turned into luxury flats Mis? That seems to be the usual pattern rather like pubs closing down, then being converted into Indian restaurants and after 18 months being demolished and the site being redeveloped as flats. Down the road here in Aylesbury the old Tindal nut-house exactly opposite Aylesbury’s cat A jail was turned into luxury flats. The famous and enormous Friern Barnet nut-house went the same way. I heard it described as ghastly by someone who had a relative in there. I used to go there to fix the computers in the Virgin gym on the ground floor. My boss told me not to hang about in there in case they admitted me!
2
Yes indeed Arfur.
Luxury flats and some new builds.
Shame really.
I don’t like change.
Good or bad, necessary or not
Lot of people in Macc look to be descendants of the poor wretches from that asylum.
2
We had a Mental Home in the Preswich near our Bradford Manchester home. Forgotten the names we used to call it. Its best we forget, saves the embarrassment to families.
1
We had ‘Bexley mental’ just down the road, which has now now been turned into flats for the extremely gullible.
Aversion therapy for unruly little cunts involved being given a guided tour of the dribblers on parade and an introduction to your new dorm mates.
The threat of being sent there straightened out a lot of lads very quickly in my teens.
3
Not a big fan of Iain Sinclar – too many long words, and not necessarily in the right order – but his London Orbital is very good on how all the aslyms around the periphery of the capital were emptied of occupants then sold to the highest bidder to become luxury flats, gated communities etc.
The loonies were just left to fend for themselves of course. If one of hem ran amok every so often and topped a member of the public, well that was just collateral damage.
1
When I was young you never saw a mong. They were either kept at home or under a chemical cosh at a local nut hospital. Now they’re on mainstream TV programs adverts. One’s even trying to lecture us all on climate change. The world’s gone mad.
14
Bring it on I say..
I’m saving all my mental health issues for July 5th..
When the pàķi noshing, white hating labour party get in..
If you can’t beat them join them..
7
Absolutely Barry.
The minute those cunts get in I’m quitting my job. No point in working anymore under a labour government.
They can kiss goodbye to the £40k I pay in income tax and start dishing the welfare to the same value.
Aah. The life of a welfare rat.
Can’t wait.
2
‘They’re coming to take you away, hey hey’. Whatever happened to the ‘men in white coats’? When I was a nipper my mum said they would be along for the bonkers bloke down the road. I suppose they must all be on bennies now. Shame really.
6
I’m surprised there’s not more of it about, considering the basket-case this country is now.
10
Has St Marcus of Rashford declared an mental elf episode after Wokegate left him out of the England squad?
Still, saves him from all that racism I suppose.
I wonder how many other footballers will be banging on about their mental elf this summer?
7
Mental health “issues” have increased in direct proportion to the benefits available for pretending to have them.
16
One in eight suffering these issues?
It’s much more than that around these parts.
4
The mental used to be kept in state funded loony bins most of the time.. now they’ve been closed down, they are thrown out onto the streets during the day to be with us ‘ normal’ types…..or for them to appear on lightweight daytime TV shows, or every fucking radio broadcast on radio 4 and radio 5…..that’s between times when they aren’t crying, raping, murdering, shoplifting or stabbing us tax generators.
13
Some probably work at the BBC
4
Care in the community -> cunt in the community.
4
I know some one who works in the massive mental health ward at St George’s hospital it’s full of fucking immigrants amassing their all fucking mad but they managed to find their way over here
5
Let me guess.
They all refer to each other as ‘Brother-cousin’. or ‘Bruncledad’?
Am I getting close?
4
is that the one here in Staffordshire
0
As with most modern shite, climate emergency, gender crap and mental health theres money and jobs to be had by pandering to the intellectually soft cunts that plague society. Once they’ve got the ball rolling it’s in the rollers best interests to keep it going. Nobody in power has the balls to call these people out for the charlatans they are.
10
Am I mental? I want napalm central Londonstan on Saturday afternoon….
4
Just londonistabistan? Why stop? When we have Lutonamabad, pak1ford and just about all large towns and cities in our once pleasant land. Dear Vladimir, please aim hear.
3
Nowadays it’s fashionable to be fucked in the head.
Everyone is putting their name down to be registered as some flavour of MitMot.
But in the old days your nutters were feared.
Chased off with flaming torch and pitchfork!
They aren’t legally responsible for their actions.
Capable of anything.
Lots of these barmpots now hold high office.
It’s dangerous.
There should be some sort of test.
If there’s a fire do you
A) inform your colleagues and exit the building in a safe and calm manner
B) inform the fire brigade and shout ” fire! Fire!”
C) masturbate furiously whilst giggling and clutching your zippo
8
It’s C for me every time.
Not sure what your point is. 🤪
3
B,then C.
1
‘Nowadays it’s fashionable to be fucked in the head’
Apparently it is also quite fashionable MNC to be fucked in the arse if you’re a bloke or trans or whatever you fucking think you are.
1
I really am mental, pills and hospitalisation to prove it. No fucker told me it was mental health week. Bloody typical, did I miss any street parties?
9
You could always spot a div in the old days walking down the street, talking and gurning to itself and you would take evasive action, nowadays every cunt you see is doing it cos they’re on their stupid phone like they are a head of state always contactable so important, but guaranteed that they’re talking bollocks.
7
I love the one’s that still think bluetooth ear pieces connected to their phones are in some way cool.
Cunts
0
Modern “mental health issues”, load of shite.
Both sides of my family have had their share of genuine nutters. One was committed to an asylum, and several instances of “Oh no, dear…we don’t talk about auntie/uncle so and so.”
Dubious “mental health” didn’t stop most of them leading rewarding lives and doing well for themselves (although incarceration in a couple of cases didn’t help).
Nowadays it’s any excuse with infantilised cunts crying in public demanding sympathy. People with real problems tend not to go looking for “Aw, hope you’re better soon, hun” on FaceFuck, etc.
Real mental health problems are no trivial thing and sufferers should not be lumped in with these weak, self indulgent crybabies.
11
Well said Sir, I too remember not talking about auntie May and uncle Mick rip. I am of the opinion that it’s just a social media inspired phase,
Remember all the celebs that were bi polar yeah right, hardly hear a thing about it now cos it was all bollocks. Massive doses of marching powder and booze will in the short term generate similar symptoms good excuse for the pr. my illness combined with my physical problems have really fucked up the golden years of my life. But one carries on and I still ride my bikes (carefully), especially into Sainsbury’s
4
So I’m not a mentaler after all!
Just drugs and Jack
Thanks B.B.
2
I know of people who collect mental disorders, self diagnosing and bleating about it on Facebook and Mumsnet so they don’t have to work.
2
Mumsnet…….jeez what a pile of overly sensitive, whimsical pile of cack.
Mumsnet is the platform that confirms women should be housewives only.
2
‘I fought in two fucking world wars, got sent all over the bastard place, shot in me arse cheek for me trouble. We just ‘ad to get on with it in them days, cuppa char an’ back out. Never did me any ‘arm. Now the fucking soft shites burst into tears if you look at ’em the wrong way. Cunts’.
Grandad; recycled endlessly in my formative years.
9
I did actually waste a few minutes of the short time I have left to wade through the stuff in the link about the World Health Organisation. It reminded me of the UN in that it appears to be staffed entirely by ethnics with a sprinkling of ultra-woke whites. In the reams of pictures on their site I could find only one white face and he was Belgian.
5
It’s not that surprising, seeing as whites make up less than 10% of the world’s population.
Evening Arfur, all. 👍
3
…and the UK in 20 years SCB
1
The Cuntamus Prime guide to the Mental Elf;
(approved by Dr Hannibal Lecter)
Are you mad? Schizophrenia/Psychosis
Are you sad?Depression znd Anxiety/ bipolar
Are you bad? Psychopathic, sociopathic or narcissistic?
Are you Dark Triad? Psychopathy, machiavellianism, narcissism.
Do you want to kill your dad?
Oedipus complex.
4
What’s ‘ dark triad” Cap?
Sounds good!
1
It’s like a Dutch cap MNC, but from Japan. It’s yellow, small, smells of noodles and has it’s own japs eye.
1
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dark_triad
0
I’m convinced that tv advertising is designed to drive people fucking bonkers………not that I watch much of it anymore. If I am watching something, every commercial break I switch off the sound and put on the tv guide menu so I don’t have to suffer the absolute pile of CUNT that passes for advertising.
4
I have standards around accuracy, efficiency, drive to improve but am constantly disappointed, flabbergasted, deflated, angered. Does my head in. What’s that called? I work in government surrounded by dullard cunts.
2
GCHQ?
0