“Good afternoon. This is IsAC’s Home Affairs correspondent Ron Knee reporting from Peckham, where protestors are trying to block the transfer of migrants from a hotel to the Bibby Stockholm barge. I’m joined by socialite and self-styled social justice warrior Araminta Heymer-Pratt; perhaps you could tell us why you’re here?”

“Well like okay yah. I mean, I’m not really sure and stuff, but like my besty Portia said it would be jolly fun, shouting ‘all migrants are welcome’, and knocking bobbies’ helmets off and shit, isn’t it? We’re like soooooo hoping to get arrested…”

“I see. Isn’t there something more constructive you could do, such as get a job?”

“Golly no. I mean, what good’s a third class degree in Gender and Diversity Studies in today’s job market? Besides *giggle* daddy’s soooooo generous with his ickle girl’s allowance. And you’re forgetting what you said yourself; this is like social and political activism to prevent the fizz (all coppers are bastards, by the way) from implementing oppressive state policies or something. These people can’t go to that place. Portia says that they can’t get a soy latté or an avocado dip there. It’s like worse than Austerlitz, and against health and safety and shit like that”

“I don’t mean to be rude, but you seem to have little grasp of the situation. For example, aren’t you concerned that unprecedented numbers of migrants are putting severe pressure on the supply of housing and access to the NHS?”

“Golly I mean I live in Hampstead, and daddy has private medical insurance for us all. It’s like soooooo not my problem”

“Then you wouldn’t be prepared to make a personal sacrifice by taking a couple of them in and looking after them yourself?”

“Oh we couldn’t possibly. We’ve only got five bathrooms, so we soooooo don’t have space. And mommy has an allergy…Oh corkers here’s my boyfriend Roddy in his vintage E-type. Isn’t she a beauty? Sozzers and all that, but must dash. We’re off to the Savoy for afternoon tiffin; the smoked salmon savouries are simply divine with a glass of champers…”

“So there you have it. Another day, another round of vacuous, trendy virtue-signalling. This is Ron Knee, for IsAC, returning you to the studio”

Daily Fail

Nominated by Ron Knee with a second helping on this topic by Sixdog Vomit below.

I’d like a short sharp cunting for the protesters who prevented a coach from taking illegal cunts to the Bibby Stockholm barge in Dorset.

I don’t want them to be put on a barge in Dorset either, I want anyone who arrives here illegally sent home and their government billed. If you can’t provide ID and won’t tell us where you’re from we will assume it’s Gaza and drop you there.

Not these cunts though, they want the illegals to be housed and fed etc at everyone else’s expense as a reward for arriving here illegally.

If you’re an asylum seeker you seek asylum in the first safe nation you enter, you don’t cross continents and multiple safe countries.

Build camps for the cunts, call them concentration camps if you like, I don’t care.

The illegals stay in the camps, get fed three meals a day and a dry warm place to sleep and a field to exercise in. Leave the camp without permission and your asylum claim ends there and then.

The way the system works now just attracts more and more of the cunts. The protesters can all fuck off. They should pay to keep the cunts here if they love them so much.

Read it and weep…

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